Director Shephard's house. Gibbs is talking to DiNozzo, cutting his toenails in the living room of Jenny's house. "The Red Sox are not going to win the World Series," Tony said.

"Care to make it interesting?" Gibbs asked.

Just then Jen walked in and grabbed the toenail clipper out of Gibbs' hand. "If you do that in here again, I will use this device to castrate you, is that clear?" she asked threateningly.

"I was done anyway," Gibbs said coolly, and put his socks and shoes back on. Jen threw the toenail clipper in the trash and went to the bedroom.

"You said she likes licking your ass," Tony whispered, "but she's disgusted by you clipping your toenails in the living room?"

"Women don't make sense," Gibbs said plainly. "You will find--" Three cell phones rang at the same time. "The ticking bomb scenario!?" Duty called! The three of them quickly got ready and into their cars, and then they flew to NCIS.

"This is the bomb timer," Fornell said, handing Jen a timer that looked more like a gun from some science fiction show, "and those are the terrorists, separated and ready for you to question." The timer was at five minutes and counting down.

"So we don't know where the bomb is?" Jen asked.

"No. One of them said that we can't block the timer's trasmission and that it transmits omnidirectionally."

Gibbs cracked his knuckles threateningly. "Give me a few minutes with them, I'll get the bomb location out of them."

The first terrorist Gibbs went to claimed to be Quinn Mallory, a young college student. Gibbs brought in a tub of water. He punched Quinn and then grabbed him by the hair and dunked his head into the water tank, then brought him up. "WHERE IS THE BOMB!?" Gibbs yelled.

"Up your butt!" Quinn answered defiantly. Back in the water, back out. "In outer space!" Back in the water, back out. "In the Statue of Liberty!" Gibbs thought for a few seconds, then gave Quinn another dunk in the water. "There's no bomb!"

Gibbs punched Quinn. "What happens if we smash the timer?" Gibbs asked.

"The tamper-detection mechanism will activate and cause the bomb to explode ahead of schedule," Quinn explained.

Gibbs punched Quinn yet again. "I'll be back."

For the second suspect, Arturo Maximilian, a chubby Englishman who looks like a famous opera tenor, Gibbs decided to try the truth serum. "It's not a bomb timer, you imbecile! It's a timer for sliding between worlds," he claimed.

"Give him more, he's too fat to be affected by a normal dosage," Gibbs ordered Ducky.

"I've already given him the maximum dosage allowed for a man his height and weight," Ducky pleaded.

Gibbs punched Ducky and took the syringe, and injected Arturo. "It's not a bomb timer, it's a puppy," Arturo said and then dropped off to sleep.

With twenty seconds left on the timer, Gibbs took a hammer and swung it at the timer, but instead hit some black guy's foot who had just kicked the timer so Gibbs couldn't smash it. Three guards grabbed the black guy, but then the timer reached zero. A vortex opened up, and the four terrorists ran into it.

"What the hell are you standing around for!? Follow them!" Gibbs ordered.

DiNozzo, McGee, Abby and Ziva jumped in, and then Gibbs. After twisting and turning through some cheap computer graphics, they all found themselves on what looked like a street in Baltimore. But there was a problem: "Air... too clean! Can't breathe!" Gibbs gasped. Instantaneously, an ambulance showed up, and DiNozzo, McGee, Ziva and Gibbs were given special masks.

"You're breathing mildly-polluted air, to help you acclimatize to the cleaner air of this world.

Twenty minutes later, the four of them were walking around Baltimore with their former prisoners. "So this is a parallel Earth?" McGee asked.

"Yes, to put it so simply," Arturo said. "Each time a decision is made, whether at the quantum level or at the macro level, the universe splits off into parallel quantum worlds reflecting the various choices."

"But something tells me," Quinn said to the NCIS team, "that this particular Earth diverged from your Earth fairly recently."

The woman of the bunch spoke: "A lot of worlds we go to often have almanacs close at hand for us to look stuff in," Wade said.

"Here we go!" Quinn said and grabbed a 2007 almanac out of a kiosk without paying for it. He quickly flipped through it. "I believe the point of divergence was the 2000 U. S. Presidential election. All votes in Florida were counted, as well as military absentee ballots. A true vietnam War veteran was elected, who immediately implemented environmental reforms. The 9/11 attacks didn't occur because government agencies took the prescribed actions already on the books, and caught all 25 hijackers before they could carry out their plan. No new laws or agencies were needed to deal with the increasing threat of radical Islam."

McGee looked at the headline in a newspaper: "Pollution down to 1940 levels, more to be done, says Prez."

"Is it just me or is this a very boring world?" DiNozzo asked.

"It just got more interesting," Ziva said. "Check that out," she said, pointing to a pornography store. In the window, there was a poster for the DVD Who's Your Daddy Now? 12, with Gibbs standing wearing blue jeans but with no shirt, and a much younger man kneeling in front of him about to unzip Gibbs' pants.

DiNozzo, McGee and Ziva looked at Gibbs. "I don't have any tattoos," Gibbs said plainly. The Gibbs in the poster had an USMC tattoo on his arm. "Only porn stars get Marine Corps tattoos."

They all decided to visit NCIS, and Gibbs was disappointed at how lax the security was, and complained about it mildly on the way to the Director's office, where they found... DiNozzo.

"I'd wanted to meet you, Jethro," the alt-DiNozzo said, "but I never thought you'd come to me." The alt-DiNozzo got a DVD case out of his desk drawer. "Would you autograph this? My husband and I have seen every single one of your videos!"

It was a copy of Who's Your Daddy Now? 8. Gibbs just glared at the alt-DiNozzo. Then alt-McGee came in and whispered something into alt-DiNozzo's ear.

"My respected colleague has just informed me that you're in fact a parallel world version of the famous porn star Jethro Gibbs," alt-DiNozzo said, then noticed his doppelganger. "Nice to see I'm just as handsome in the parallel world."

"And just as full of steam," Ziva said.

"Full of hot air," the regular Tony corrected Ziva.

"Well," the alt-DiNozzo said, straightening his jacket, "if you want to stay in this world or slide back to your world, it's up to you."

They chose to slide back to their world.

Epilogue

Abby and Ducky were talking as Ducky leafed through the parallel Earth almanac. "Do you think we'll ever elect a Black president?" Abby asked.

"Within your lifetime, certainly," replied Ducky, "but most likely not during mine."

"What about in the parallel Earth?"

"According to this almanac, they have three African Americans in the Senate, and two in the Supreme Court, which is only slightly better than in this world."

"You know what I should've asked the DiNozzo in the parallel world?"

"What?"

"Who's his husband."