Leroy Jethro Gibbs woke with a start, marine senses on high alert. He glanced at the clock on the bedside table; the bright numbers illuminating the clock face 3am.

BANG, BANG, BANG - he definitely heard that, someone was thumping on his front door.

Gibbs jumped out of bed, grabbed his sig and headed towards the door; pausing briefly as the wails of a small child could be heard coming from the front of his house.

Approaching the door slowly he opened it (Clearing the porch area as he did so), before looking down.

“What the hell…�

Sitting at his feet was a baby seat, which currently held a screaming child, which couldn’t be more than a year old; tears streaming down its face.

Gibbs cautiously checked the street; whoever had left the child had taken off - and quickly. Bending down, Gibbs scooped up the child seat complete with crying baby and went back into the house, placing the seat and child on the kitchen table. Once the lights had been turned on Gibbs quickly took in the child’s condition. The little boy, Gibbs deducted by the blue sleeping suit, was filthy - covered in dirt and what looked like streaks of blood.

“Hey buddy,� Gibbs softened his voice so as to try calming the child who was still sobbing. He quickly undid the straps, holding the child and lifted him gently into his arms murmuring soft comfort, “Shhh… It’s okay now… Shhh. Everything will be alright now…� Gibbs continued talking and rocking the child in his arms as he found his house phone. It was early, but he knew he needed to call Ducky to come and take a look at the child.

After about the fifth ring Dr Donald Mallard answered his phone,

“Hello.� A tired voice came from the other end.

“Duck, its Gibbs.�

“My, My Jethro do you know what time it is?�

Gibbs quickly cut him off, “Listen Duck, sorry, but I need you to come over and bring your medical bag. Someone has left a baby on my doorstep, and by the looks of things, he’s a little banged up.�

“Heavens! Of course Jethro - I’ll be there straight away.� And with that Gibbs snapped his phone shut.

Gibbs looked down at the child in his arms; the little boy still had silent tears falling down his cheeks,

“Ah buddy� Gibbs sighed, “What is going on with you, huh?� Gibbs walked back into the kitchen area and looked towards the baby seat. There was a bag attached to the back of it and it looked like some kind of baby bag.

I guess someone planned this late night drop off, Gibbs thought to himself, but before he could open the bag he heard his front door open and the familiar Scottish brogue of Dr (Ducky) Mallard calling out

“Jethro?�

“In here Duck.� Gibbs replied turning around to face the good Dr.

“Oh my goodness Jethro, what do we have here?� Ducky crossed the floor and collected the baby from Gibbs’ arms,

“Let me take a look at you my boy,� Ducky crooned, “Jethro if you could be so kind as to get a blanket, a towel, washcloth and some warm water. Let’s get this little fellow cleaned up, shall we?�

Gibbs grabbed the items Ducky requested and brought them out to the older gentleman, who was rocking the baby in his arms. The baby had again started to sniffle and sob.

“If you could be so kind Jethro, as to place the blanket down on the table, we will have a look at this poor boy.�

Gibbs did as directed and placed the blanket on the table folding it a couple of times so as to give the boy a little padding from the hard table. Ducky then lay the baby down and with quick gentle hands removed the baby’s filthy sleep suit and started to wipe down the little body with the warm water. “Geez Duck!� Jethro exclaimed his voice getting louder and angrier by the second, “Look at the bruises and cuts, looks like someone beat the poor kid!� His voice was now booming

“Jethro please calm down - you’re frightening the poor boy.� The child was whimpering softly,

“Calm down, calm down…� Gibbs whispered, before saying, “Look at him Duck.�

“Yes Jethro I can see, but you are upsetting him and from the looks of what he has been through, that is the last thing the poor boy needs. Now, I don’t suppose whoever left him here left any clothes or anything with him did they?�

Gibbs just grunted and moved around the table to grab the baby bag, which was still attached to the baby seat, before moving back to Ducky’s side.

Opening the bag he quietly asked, “What have we got Duck?�

“Well Jethro,� Ducky said, his eyes darkening, “It looks like your initial assessment of the child was correct. It looks as though someone did beat him, and I would hazard a guess that it has been going on for a while.�

“Anything broken, Duck?� Gibbs asked

“Fortunately for the lad no, just the cuts and bruises. The best thing now is to get him fed and try putting him to sleep. Do you have any idea why someone would drop a baby at your door in the middle of the night, especially one so young?�

“None at all duck, but I intend to find out.�

Gibbs rummaged around in the baby’s bag and pulled out a bottle, diaper, and another sleep suit. As he did so a white envelope fell out on to the table. Gibbs picked up the envelope and turned it over; eyes wide at the name printed on the front - ‘Leroy Jethro Gibbs’. He opened the letter, whilst Ducky changed the baby and got a bottle ready.

*************************************************************************************************

My Dearest L.J,

I am so sorry to have to do this, especially after these years of no contact, but I have no other choice as we are in grave danger if we stay. Please take care of my precious little Anthony. You are his only hope of life and love, and the only person I can trust. Taped to the bottom of the baby seat is a DVD and a USB drive. These should provide you with all the information you need to take down my husband and explain what is going on. I am not proud of the part I have played in this, but I need to make it right.

Please take care of my son, I know after watching you with Kelly for all those years that you will give him the love and protection he needs.

Love always

Isabella DiNozzo (Paddington)

Gibbs was lost in his thoughts of the past when Ducky brought him back to the present,

“Jethro are you alright?� He asked, walking over to where Gibbs stood. Ducky was gently holding young Anthony; the boy almost asleep. Gibbs gently took the baby from his arms, cuddling him softly, being mindful of the bruises, and handed the letter to Ducky. After a few moments Ducky spoke,

“So I take it you know who Isabella Dinozzo is - and that little Anthony is not here by accident…� Gibbs took a deep breath, sighed, and proceeded to tell Ducky all about Isabella, the lovely woman his wife Shannon and he met all those years ago.

-------FLASHBACK-------

“Mr. & Mrs. Gibbs, welcome to the Georgetown University Hospital maternity wing, I’m Isabella,� A young woman with blonde hair, sparkling eyes and a friendly manner greeted them, “Let’s get you settled in, if you would care to follow me.�

Jethro pushed the wheelchair, which held his heavily pregnant wife, down the corridor of the hospital following the young Isabella, into a comfortable looking room,

“So tomorrow is the big day when you will finally get to meet your little one! Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?� Isabella asked.

“We are having a girl, my latest ultrasound showed clearly. At least I hope it was clear, because we went a little overboard with the pink in the nursery,� Shannon and Jethro chuckled remembering the nursery back home, “I’m so excited, but I can’t help but be nervous at the same time.�

“Don’t worry Mrs. Gibbs, I’m sure your husband will be with you every step of the way and I’ll be here to answer any questions you have and look after you. You just settle in get comfortable, rest up and look forward to meeting your daughter tomorrow morning. I’ll be back to check on you later on.� “Thank you,� Shannon spoke, “And please call me Shannon.�

With that Isabella walked out of the room giving them both a bright smile.

-------END FLASHBACK-------

“So,� Ducky interrupted, “You met Isabella back when Kelly was born?� Gibbs nodded slowly and glanced at the bundle in his arms - tears shining in his eyes. Kelly and Shannon were a sensitive subject with the ex-marine.

“Kelly was born the next day, 3 days later we took her home. Isabella and Shannon really hit it off in those first few days at the hospital, Isabella was such a great help to us with all the new parent stuff. When we were home she used to come over a few times a week, or whenever Shannon called her just to help us out. We all became great friends, so much so that we named Isabella Kelly’s Godmother,� Gibbs stopped and took a shaky breath and started speaking again; emotion thick in his voice, “When Shannon and Kelly died, Isabella would come over and bring me food, she would sit with me, and talk to me. We remained good friends and she helped me through my grief.� A tear slid down Gibbs’ cheek as he remembered his beautiful wife and his vibrant little girl who had left him 9 years ago,

“I owe Isabella a lot. She was the one who stopped me sliding permanently into the big black hole I was in. We kept in touch catching up for dinner, until about 5 years ago. Isabella met a man in Long Island moved over there and they got married. I would get letters occasionally - maybe three or so a year, then about 2 years ago the letters stopped/ I haven’t heard from her at all…’till now.� Gibbs struggled to get his emotions in control; he wasn’t used to showing his feelings so openly, even to Ducky, who was still the only member of his team who knew about Shannon and Kelly. That was about to change, Gibbs thought with a heavy heart, this was going to bring up a lot of memories and he wasn’t sure he wanted to, or was ready to share with anyone except Ducky.

“This is Isabella’s boy Duck, I owe it to her to look after him till we can find her and figure this thing out.� Ducky looked over to Gibbs with concern etched across his features,

“Certainly Jethro, but she may be in a world of trouble. What did she mean by bringing down her husband?�

“I haven’t got a clue Duck, all I know is she married Anthony Dinozzo Senior around 5 years ago. Whatever is on this DVD and memory stick will hopefully shed some light on the situation, what she has gotten into, and what happened to her little guy here,� Gibbs looked down fondly at the sleeping bundle in his arms, “We should get started straight away!�

Sighing Ducky spoke, “I understand your urgency Jethro, I do. But it’s 4.30 in the morning and little Anthony has been through a lot. Let’s let him sleep for an hour or so - you freshen up and get ready. We can call the team on the way back to the office.�

“Alright Duck.� Gibbs replied; slowly walking over to the couch in the lounge room. He placed the little bundle down and gently wrapped a blanket around him.

“Can you watch him a minute while I get ready?� He asked,

“Of course, my boy.� Ducky said, crossing the room to take a seat next to little Anthony on the couch, and watched him sleep as Gibbs made his way upstairs.

************************************************************************************************

After about 30 minutes Gibbs appeared back down stairs after having showered and changed, and took in the sight before him. Ducky had fallen asleep on the couch next to the little boy and was snoring softly. Gibbs sighed to himself,

“I guess I’ll let them sleep for a little longer before we go.� He then went back over to the table and picked up the baby bag. Looking inside, he started to pull things out. There were a few spare diapers, a blue pacifier, and a couple of bottles. There was also a cute blue and aqua stuffed animal, which looked like a dragon with big eyes and silver wings. There were two more sleeping suits, a tiny pair of jeans, a tiny blue hooded zip up jumper and two tiny long sleeved tops, one with the words, ‘Lock up your daughters’ written on it, and the other read, ‘Too Cute’. Gibbs smiled softly, his eyes shining with unshed tears - this was typical Isabella.

-------FLASHBACK-------

It was a wonderful time for a BBQ, the day was warm and the sun was shining. Kelly, who was now close to a year old, was lying out in the sun on a blanket - kicking her little legs about enjoying the warmth, whilst Jethro and Shannon were watching fondly. Jethro was preparing the BBQ watching proudly over his beautiful wife and daughter, and Shannon was sitting on the ground in reach of Kelly smiling softly.

“Hello. Shan, L.J I have arrived!� Isabella called out, her bubbly voice echoing from inside,

“Out here Bella� Shannon called to the young woman who had become her best friend and closest confidant, even with the 7year age gap between the two. Isabella walked out into the sunshine; her blonde hair glistening in the sunlight, a bright grin on her face,

“Hello L.J,“ She said, giving him a kiss on the cheek, “I hope you haven’t burnt our lunch,� She teased cheekily, before; “Shan, my dearest!� She exclaimed, giving Shannon a kiss and a big hug, “Do I have gossip for you!�

Both women laughed at the greeting.

“And look who it is, my beautiful niece! You look more and more gorgeous like your mum every day,� Isabella crooned, “I have a present for you.�

Shannon laughed, “It’s your birthday Bella, yet Kells gets a present!�

“Hey I’m 22, I’ll have plenty of time for presents!� Isabella laughed, “Besides, it is my duty to spoil my favorite little girl!� And with that Isabella brought out a large pink box covered with ribbon.

“Shan, you may need to help our Kells out, the box is pretty big. I got a little carried away…�

“I can see that Bella.� Gibbs chuckled from where he was cooking,

“Don’t worry L.J, I have something in there you will appreciate!� Isabella smiled, her green eyes sparkling brightly. With that Shannon took the box and begun to open it. Inside was a cute little pink and purple stuffed dragon, with big eyes and shiny silver wings, and two little pink t-shirts with ‘My Mummy’s a fox’ and ‘Daddy’s girl’ written on them respectively.

“Oh Bella, they are so cute, thank you!� Shannon cried her smile wide as she picked Kelly up to sit on her lap.

“ See L.J - ‘Daddy’s girl’! Told you there was something you would approve of. I love those little slogan shirts, they’re so cute! I’m going to make my kids wear them all the time!� Bella and Shannon both laughed, their conversation soon turning into their usual girlie talk, as Jethro smiled looking over at his family, and their extended member, Isabella.

-------END FLASHBACK-------

Small whimpering interrupted his thoughts, so he crossed the room and picked the baby up, slowly rocking him in his arms and running his hand through the soft hair,

“Shhh, buddy, its okay. Go back to sleep - Shhh…� The baby stopped his fussing and looked up to Gibbs, tears stuck to his little eyelashes.

“Oh dear, Jethro,� Ducky muttered, awaking from his slumber, “I am sorry; I must have drifted off to sleep.�

“It’s fine Duck. Besides little Tony here just woke up. Didn’t you buddy?� “Tony…?� Ducky enquired a look of amusement on his face.

�Yeah well… Anthony is too big of a name for a baby,� Gibbs replied shrugging his shoulders, “Anyway; do you need anything before we head to the office?� Gibbs asked, handing Tony over to Ducky and stuffing the baby’s things back into the bag - with the exception of the pacifier and the toy dragon, which, Gibbs decided, might come in handy with the trip to the office.

“No, No Jethro, I packed a bag when I got your phone call; I figured I might need it. It was just luck my mother is away with her seniors group for the week… In fact this whole situation reminds me of a story; it was in ’67…or perhaps ‘65. No, no it was ’67…�

“Duck come on - let’s go.� Gibbs instructed, before Ducky could get too involved in one of his long winded stories. As much as Gibbs loved the elderly M.E and respected him, sometimes his stories could… well, come at an inconvenient time.

“I’ll grab his baby seat and things, Duck, if you can carry Tony out to my car. You might as well leave yours here,� The men walked out to the car, Gibbs unlocking the door as best he could with one hand, “I don’t have one of those connections to bolt in his baby seat, so you may have to hold him till we can get one put in.�

With that Gibbs jumped into the car and started it, calling his team and informing them they had a case and to meet at the Navy yard ASAP. Ducky slid into the passenger side, clutching young Tony who was, again, asleep.

The trip to the naval yard was relatively uneventful, and the trio made good time - even with the stop-off to the convenience store for some emergency baby rations. Gibbs had decided to get some extra diapers, baby formula and a few jars of what he could only describe as ‘mush’, before making their way into the naval yard.

As Gibbs pulled over into the parking bay he turned off the car, stuffing the baby bag with the soft dragon, pacifier, and the rest of the goodies he had brought, before looking over to his companion. The elderly ME was smiling ear to ear and talking in soft tones to the little boy who was now awake, alert and looking around.

“You ready Duck?� Gibbs called,

“Yes Jethro, we are ready aren’t we Anthony?� Ducky enquired to their young charge, who of course didn’t reply and was now chewing on his fingers making baby burbling noises. Gibbs led the way, and when the familiar ping of the elevator doors opening sounded, Gibbs noted that the bullpen was empty of agents and his team had yet to arrive. It was still early and dark outside but the fact that the bright fluorescent lights were on indicated that the cleaners were somewhere around the place. Gibbs walked across to his desk, setting the baby bag down on the floor besides him. Ducky followed and gently passed Tony to him - the child was still burbling away, his fingers in his mouth.

“Well Jethro, I’m off downstairs - I still have a report to do on our latest guest from the Ross case. If you need anything at all just let me know,� Ducky gently patted the little boys hair and walked off saying, “Be good my young Anthony, and don’t get into any mischief, or you’ll have to answer to Jethro here.� Gibbs chuckled at that - how much mischief could a one year old get in to?

With the baby sitting comfortably on his lap, he reached into the pocket of his jacket and got out the DVD and memory stick and placed them onto his desk. He then stopped to look at the child; who was smiling and trying to reach for various things on his desk. Tony was a good-looking baby, with his tanned olive complexion and his blonde hair, which was curling endearingly at the ends. He looked like one of those cherub angels, but not quite as chubby. He guessed (Having never met DiNozzo Senior) that his complexion and hair may have come from either parent.

But it was the child’s eyes that were the most striking - brilliant green orbs that sparkled brightly. There was no mistaking those eyes - pure Isabella. Gibbs remembered Shannon saying once that with Isabella it was all in the eyes, she could smile and say everything was fine, and give you one of her mega-watt grins. But if you looked at her eyes they would tell you what you needed to know. Yes, Tony had definitely inherited his mother’s eyes. Gibbs smiled at the memory, and gave Tony another gentle cuddle.

The baby was waving his hands about, bouncing up and down on Gibbs’ knee, giggling and occasionally whacking Gibbs in the face with his tiny hands. This was the site that met his three Agents when they came strolling into the bullpen a few minutes later,

“Sorry Gibbs,� Said Agent Caitlin (Kate) Todd, “We decided to car pool this morning, and McGee was running late.�

“I was not!� Protested Agent Tim McGee, who sounded a little put out at being ratted on to their boss.

“We told you 05.15 did we not, McGee?� Ziva David spoke with a hint of humor in her accented voice.

“But…..� McGee was about to protest when all three agents stopped in front of their boss’ desk, mouths open as Gibbs was bouncing the baby on his knee.

“B-Boss?� Stammered McGee.

This was not a usual sight. Their boss L.J (second B for bastard) Gibbs, smiling and bouncing a small baby on his knee.

“Kate, McGee, Ziva, this is Anthony DiNozzo Jr - our new case!� Gibbs spoke, without his usual gruffness, so as not to frighten the small child. He explained to his team what had happened over the course of the last few hours. He had explained about Isabella and had told them she was a family friend.

Now for the hard part - explaining to his team about Shannon and Kelly. He had to keep his emotions in check, had to keep them believing he was that gruff ex-marine that they respected and feared. He couldn’t show them how much he was hurting, how broken he truly was. Ziva glanced over at Gibbs - she knew what was coming. Un-known to the rest of them, Ziva had received and read over dossiers for the entire team, before accepting her newest mission as Mossad Liaison Officer with NCIS. Ziva saw the flash of pain in Gibbs’ eyes, before she spoke up.

“Gibbs,� She paused, “I can fill the team in on this next part, I was given dossiers on you all before accepting this position... I know what needs to be said.� Ziva held Gibbs’ stare. There it was - his out - his way to not have to bring out his past, dig up his emotions. He briefly nodded his acknowledgement of Ziva’s offer - he was grateful.

“Okay,� Gibbs said, “Ziva; fill them in, I think this little man is due for a change. I’ll be back in 10 minutes and we will get started.� With that he picked Tony up, holding him gently, and grabbed the baby bag from the floor.

************************************************************************************************

It was now 7 am and agents started coming in and moving around the bullpen. Many of them looked like they were about to make a comment to the ex-marine about the small child, but he silenced them with one of his icy glares. He quickly made his way down to autopsy, the whoosh of the doors announcing his arrival,

“Ah Jethro, Anthony - to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?� Ducky spoke, his eyes sparkling with humor as he saw the little boy (who was doing his best to grab hold of Jethro’s fingers to put in his mouth),

“I was hoping I could borrow your office for a moment, to change Tony.�

“Of course my dear boy, of course.� Ducky walked over and held the door to his office open. Gibbs walked inside and set Tony down on the couch, pulling a diaper and a few wipes from the baby bag and proceeded to change the baby. Tony for his part kept kicking his legs and trying to sit up thoroughly; enjoying the freedom from the stuffy diaper.

Ducky chuckled from his spot in the doorway, fondly looking over Gibbs and the boy; it had been too long since Ducky had seen Gibbs smile. Not wanting to burst this happy bubble he approached the next subject with caution,

“Did you fill the team in on what's going on Jethro?�

“Yeah Duck, I did.�

“Shannon and Kelly?� Ducky spoke softly. Gibbs looked up, pain flashing through his ice blue eyes.

“Ziva is filling them in now - she had dossiers on us all before she took the position, she knows what to say,� Gibbs sighed and focused on Tony, getting his sleep suit off and fishing around for his clothes, “I couldn’t do it Duck, I couldn’t tell them. I can’t go through it again; I barely made it through last time.� Distress was clearly evident in his voice.

“My dear boy, I’m sure they will understand. I know how you feel about sharing your feelings and emotions. You will face things when you are ready, no one will push this on you.�

“ Thanks Duck.� Gibbs replied, looking back at Tony who was fussing slightly. Gibbs grabbed the pacifier out of the baby bag and coaxed it into the baby’s mouth; making him stop fussing and start to suck it desperately.

“I'll get McGee to take some photos of little Tony’s bruises later on for evidence - do you think you could write a report on your findings?�

“Not a problem Jethro, I’ll send it to you as soon as it is done.�

Now that Tony was changed and in a new set of clothes, Gibbs went back to the bullpen. He knew what needed to be done.

~*~

The ping of the elevator announced his arrival to his team and they all turned around to face him, sympathetic looks on their faces.

That was it - they knew, but he couldn’t let their sympathies barrage through his stony façade. Before they could open their mouths, he went to his desk, snapping out his orders and making the baby in his arms jump at the tone,

“Kate, put this DVD up on the plasma, and then I want a full background check on Anthony DiNozzo Senior.� Gibbs tossed the DVD across the desks to her, “McGee, find out what you can off the USB.�

“Yes boss.� He answered, quickly getting to work.

“Ziva, put a BOLO out on Isabella DiNozzo, and get me a full background check on her as well.� Gibbs then sat Tony on the floor and got out the little dragon toy to keep him entertained. He looked back up at the plasma where Kate had the DVD running.

A beautiful woman, around her late thirties, appeared on screen; her blonde hair flowing softly around her shoulders, a ghost of a smile playing on her lips. It was Isabella. Her eyes looked tired, sad and didn’t hold any of the sparkle Gibbs had remembered but it was her. She started talking; her voice soft and reflecting the tiredness in her eyes.

“Hi L.J,� She began. Gibbs looked down towards her son, who was rolling around on the floor, making small noises and playing with the toy,

“I am sorry - so sorry. I didn’t have a choice; I take it if you are watching this then you found my little gift. My precious boy is now yours. By the time you are watching this; I will more than likely be dead. Morbid I know, but he will make it so. I guess I have a lot of explaining to do so I will start at the beginning.�

Gibbs stared at the beautiful woman on the screen, pain etched on her face.

“It started 5 years ago, do you remember? I took off to Long Island after meeting the love of my life, prominent businessman Anthony Dominic DiNozzo. Anthony was a banker and he also had some shipping businesses - he loved me, made me feel wonderful, and we were married not long after. We lived in a large Estate in Long Island. Anthony had millions - not only did he make a fortune on his own, but his family was from… ‘old money’ you could say. Not to mention my family, as you know, is also quite well to do - we wanted for nothing and lived the high life. “

Gibbs looked down to where Tony was crawling away to the middle of the desk area. He stood up, walking over to grab the small child, who started rubbing his eyes tiredly, and snuggled him in his arms before turning his attention back to the plasma.

“Things started to go downhill a few years into our marriage. I sent you a letter just before the wedding, if you remember, and at that stage Anthony was already a jealous man and very possessive of me. All my correspondence to you was in secret. I guess that should have been my first warning.

However, I now see that as a savior, at least I have somewhere safe for my son, somewhere Anthony doesn’t know about. He had gotten greedy and was mixing in some rather undesirable businesses, the USB I sent you will include all you need to know about these transactions. Anthony was also drinking on a regular basis, his possessiveness and jealousy got worse, and it was at the point where I couldn’t leave the house without him. I guess you’re probably wondering why I didn’t just leave him. Well over the years I learnt the hard way - no one crosses Anthony. No one touches what is his and no one ever leaves him, unless it’s in a wooden box. If he can’t have something, no one will.

He has been under the suspicion of police and federal agencies for a while, but money and good lawyers talk, and they couldn’t make anything stick - he covers his tracks well. The information on the USB is directly from his concealed personal computer, this is the only copy of the information that will bring him down, and not even his lawyers know about this. I’m sure he thought no one knew.

Anyway our son, Anthony Dominic DiNozzo Jr. was born 12 months ago; we called him Tony for short. That’s when the trouble really started; Anthony was so jealous of Tony and the attention I gave him when he was first born. He would constantly get into these drunken rages and lash out at Tony. You have seen the bruises I assume? I soon learnt if I ignored Tony, Anthony wouldn’t lash out at him as much. We got a nanny, and Tony became the responsibility of our hired help. Can you believe my child was never taught to say Mom, because he didn’t know who that was supposed to be? Don’t worry about him being attached to anyone in particular from home; he never spent long enough with one person to become attached.�

Self-loathing clouded Isabella’s voice as she spoke.

“Anthony still hated the child but at least his attention wasn’t on him all the time… But then the last straw came. Tony was unwell and wouldn’t stop crying. Anthony was drinking again and got in such a rage he stormed into Tony’s bedroom picked him up and started shaking him violently; he then stuck him outside in rose bushes and left him there. I was so scared he would kill him if I went straight to his aid. So I went upstairs to bed, and once Anthony had passed out in his office, I grabbed the things I needed - including the USB which I had already copied a few days earlier, got Tony and left. I headed straight for you; you are the only one I can trust. I can’t go to my family or Anthony’s, for obvious reasons, and any friends of mine were also known to Anthony, except for you.

I knew Anthony would come after me so I left Tony at your house and took off. I know you will keep my boy safe, I have no doubt if Anthony finds him he will kill him. All the adoption papers are on the USB also as well as a contact number for a lawyer of mine who Anthony is unaware of - she will be able to keep the adoption secret so Anthony will not find out. She also has information of a private account with enough money in it to provide for Tony for the rest of his life, plus extra. Please take care of my boy - he deserves so much more than the life he was born into. I am sorry… Goodbye L.J. Tony - despite everything Mommy loves you.�

With tears streaming down her face, Isabella blew a final kiss to her baby before the screen went black.

The bullpen was deathly silent, not even the sound of typing could be heard, and Gibbs noted his agents had all paused what they were doing. McGee looked shocked and pale, Kate had tears rolling down her cheeks, and Ziva looked livid. Isabella’s heartfelt speech had disturbed them all, and Gibbs hoped that he had managed to keep his face neutral.

At that moment Tony started whimpering softly, snapping them all back to reality - McGee, Kate and Ziva getting quickly back to work. Tony’s cries started increasing in volume; at some point the boy had lost his pacifier and it was nowhere to be seen. Gibbs was pacing the floor holding Tony close - rubbing his back, stroking his hair and whispering soft words.

The whole time he was thinking things over in his mind. Bella was in trouble, if not dead. They had information to bring down a man who, until this point, had eluded police and federal agencies. And then there was the boy, whom his dear friend had entrusted him to look after, a boy who, according to adoption papers, was soon to become his son. This was all too much. The emotions were still too raw to comprehend.

Tony had stopped crying and was sniffling, burying his face into Gibbs’ jacket, leaving a trail of boogers on his shoulder. Gibbs sighed as he heard Tony little tummy growling.

“Ok buddy, let’s get some food into your belly, shall we?� Walking back over to his desk, sitting down on his chair and getting Tony settled on his lap, he removed a jar of baby food from the bag and looked at it - mashed pumpkin and potatoes,

“Yum.� He said sarcastically. He opened the draw to his desk, removing one of the plastic spoons he had acquired from many coffee runs. He opened the jar and, placing it on his desk, began feeding the baby on his lap.

“Mmmmm….� Tony spoke, bouncing up and down as he took mouthfuls of the mush, “Mmmmm….Bub….Bub.�

“You like that stuff, little bubby?� Kate said, looking over with a grin. The little boy, Tony, had the same amount of food on his face as in his tummy, and Gibbs had only just started the feeding process. She chuckled at the thought - this was going to get messy.

“Ziva, What have you got?� Gibbs asked, looking up from the baby.

“Well Gibbs, I have put out the BOLO based on the description from the DVD, no hits yet. As for personal information I have found nothing that we did not already know, she was ‘shiny clean’ - not even a parking ticket.�

“It’s squeaky clean, Ziva.� McGee interrupted.

“That, McGee, makes no sense. Why would something be squeaky if it was clean? Shiny makes more sense, yes?� McGee opened his mouth to reply before Gibbs cut him off,

“McGee, you got anything?�

“Yeah Boss, there is heaps of information here. Everything from shipping logs, to bank account details - there are inventory reports, contracts for dodgy dealings… this guy is going down for a long time.�

“Kate!� Gibbs demanded,

“Nothing yet Gibbs - someone is blocking our access to DiNozzo Sr’s file.� “Who!?�

“FBI� Kate replied with a steely tone.

Gibbs was so busy conversing with the team he didn’t notice the small hands reaching toward the open jar of mush. Tony’s small hands wrapped around the jar and, pulling it towards himself, tipped it upside down - dumping the contents of the jar on himself and all over Gibbs’ pants, before tossing the jar as far as he could.

“What the…?� Gibbs looked down when he felt something fall onto his pants and saw the jar flying out of the corner of his eye.

“Bub, Bub, Bub.� Tony was clapping his hands and laughing, eyes sparkling with mischief, spreading the orange mush further over himself and Gibbs. Tony was also making attempts at talking, which sounded like gibberish.

Kate, Ziva and McGee had to stifle a laugh - but as Gibbs stood up, orange mush over his lap, holding a now orange baby at arm’s length they couldn’t contain themselves. Gibbs glared at them and barked,

“Hey, back to work!� As he left the bullpen with the baby bag a small smile on his face, and headed towards the locker room to change the baby for the second time that morning.

************************************************************************************************

After quickly changing his own pants and shirt, which had little orange handprints on it, Gibbs set to work cleaning up the baby,

“You’re a grubby bubby aren’t you, messy boy.� Gibbs laughed softly; Tony was again talking gibberish with the occasional words ‘Bub, Bub’ and ‘Car’ being the only words Gibbs could make out. Tony had one clean shirt and the blue hooded jumper left but no pants.

“This will have to do buddy, ‘till I can get you something else to wear.� Putting on a clean diaper, and the last long sleeve shirt on the little baby, Gibbs scooped him up, gently running his hand through the soft hair before whisking him back to the bull pen.

He smiled at the warm little body in his arms - Abby would love this, Abbs and Kate were always going on about feelings and stuff. Gibbs made a pact to himself that he would introduce Tony to Abby as soon as she returned to work tomorrow.

Once back in the bullpen, Gibbs sat Tony on the floor next to his desk and handed him his Dragon. He really should get the kid something more to play with, but that would have to wait for now. After a few minutes the phone rang,

“Gibbs.� He said, his voice again gaining the gruffness that was trademark. Listening intently, he eventually slammed down the phone a little harder than necessary,

“Gear up,� He barked, “Got a hit on our BOLO. A woman was killed - shot while in a taxi on the Theodore Roosevelt Memorial Bridge. Her description matches Isabella’s.�

“Ziva, McGee! You’re with me, Kate - watch him.�

The tone in Gibbs’ voice held no argument, ice blue eyes boring into his agent as he pointed to the child who was trying to put his toes in his mouth. Gibbs voice softened at the sight,

“Make sure you look after him. And find out why the FBI is stonewalling us from DiNozzo’s file.� With that he turned on his heel and made his way out of the bullpen, Ziva and McGee raced off to follow, throwing sympathetic looks in Kate’s direction.

As Kate started back to her desk she glanced over towards the middle of the bullpen where the baby had now crawled, boogers coming out of his nose. She sighed grabbed a tissue and wiped the tiny nose clean, noting he had very rosy cheeks at current. She smiled; she was definitely starting to feel ‘clucky’. Kate had no idea why the other two team members gave her those odd looks as they left. As far as she was concerned she had the easier task, staying in the warmth of the office, and watching an adorable baby, how hard could that be? She placed the baby next to her own desk with his toy and continued to get back to work.

*************************************************************************************************

Gibbs drove at a furious pace towards the Roosevelt Bridge, foot flat to the floor, his agents holding on for their dear lives. Even Ziva looked rattled at the pace and erratic movements brought on by dodging the other cars.

Screeching to a halt Gibbs could see the whole bridge had been blocked off - police tape, cars and officers blocking any attempt to access the murder site. Stalking towards an officer, Gibb’s flashed his badge.

“Agent Gibbs, N.C.I.S.� Gibbs was in full intimidation mode now, his voice as steely as his glare. Never one to beat around the proverbial bush, his next words were straight to the point, “We are here to take over the crime scene.�

“Umm… Ah, sorry Sir. I’ll, umm… just go get the Captain, he’s in charge.� The young officer stammered and looked pale as he headed off towards where the officer in charge had set himself up.

“You could have been a little nicer to him Gibbs, could you not?� Ziva stated, exasperation in her voice.

Gibbs looked at Ziva and McGee, an un-readable expression on his face, before turning his back to them and walking over to where the young agent was bringing their commanding officer.

“He doesn’t play well with others, does he?� Ziva questioned to Mc Gee before following Gibbs’ lead.

“Captain Michaels, DC Metro,� A tall burley man introduced himself to Gibbs and his team, “Agent Gibbs I presume. Care to explain why Officer Jefferies came to tell me you were threatening to take over the investigation? I don’t see any boats or wayward sailors around here do you?� Captain Michaels chuckled at his own joke while Officer Jefferies, who had regained some of his colour after the initial meeting, tried to avoid eye contact with the agents.

“It wasn’t a threat.� Gibbs stated abruptly, eyes darkening with anger.

“Well Agent Gibbs, sorry to burst your bubble but you’re too late. FBI arrived 45 minutes ago - an agent ‘Fornell’ took over the whole investigation. They blocked all information regarding the woman in the car, we weren’t even able to respond to your BOLO’s till he had finished. They already got the body and evidence; we are just about to remove the road blocks,� The Captain said, “You can fight them for this one.� With that the Captain left Gibbs and his team.

“Shit...� Gibbs swore, frustration in his voice, “McGee, Ziva. Let’s go.� Gibbs stalked back to the car; he knew exactly who he needed to talk to.

*************************************************************************************************

Back at the office Kate was having a hard time. She thought this would be the easy job. However, just after she had sat back down, the whimpering had started. Softly at first, but soon developed into full blown screaming, and nothing she could do would calm the little baby down. She had tried soothing words and rubbing his back as Gibbs had done earlier, she had tried a bottle and the pacifier which she had found under Gibbs’ desk. 30 minutes later and nothing - the cries were getting louder and now the Director stood in front of her wanting an explanation as to why there was a baby in the office, and why he was making such a racket.

Then, suddenly, a strange churning sound was heard coming from the little baby, followed by what was quite possibly the worst smell Kate had ever smelt in her life - and that was saying a lot.

“Oh my gosh…� Kate said with disgust as she held the baby at arms length, the smell overpowering.

“Perhaps, Agent Todd, you should change him first. Then you can explain this to me.� The Director walked away quickly; the smell becoming too much for her to take.

Kate was pretty sure the kid was unwell - he felt quite warm in her arms. She rushed to grab the nappy bag, still holding the baby at arms length and made her way down to Ducky - he would know what to do.

At the whoosh of the doors opening Ducky turned around to see Kate with an exasperated look on her face, holding little Anthony at arms length, his nappy looking full and something horrible starting to come out of one of the little leg guards.

“Ah… umm, Ducky,� Kate started, “I don’t think Tony is very well and we’ve had a breach of diaper integrity here, could you, ah.. Maybe…give me a hand?�

“Oh my dear, dear boy� Ducky said softly taking in the sight of the baby, who was snuffling and still whimpering “What happened, Caitlin?� Ducky carefully took the baby from Kate’s arms and bore him into his office, laying him down to change him.

“Ducky it was horrible, he wouldn’t stop screaming. I tried everything, the poor baby… I...I couldn’t help him, couldn’t calm him down, he was screaming for half an hour…Poor little thing. Then he did this,� Kate said voice full of distress and sadness pointing to the diaper which was full and leaking, “He’s really warm too Duck. Isabella said he wasn’t well at the moment.�

“Isabella….. Caitlin, when did you speak to Isabella?�

“We didn’t, she mentioned it on the DVD she left with Gibbs.�

“Oh,� Ducky’s expression fell, he was hoping the young woman was okay and had made contact with his friend, “Where is Jethro?�

“He’s out responding to a BOLO on woman who matched the description of Isabella.� Kate looked at the little baby sadness in her eyes. If the woman from the BOLO was indeed Isabella, the little boy would never get the chance to know his mom. Isabella would never hear her precious boy calling her ‘Mommy’.

Ducky cleaned up the little boy, changed his diaper and put him into the only clean item of clothing he had left (the little blue zip-up jumper). He then grabbed a thermometer and checked the baby’s temperature.

“Caitlin, I believe you are right. Anthony does appear to have a temperature, he may have picked up a bug somewhere from the looks of it. The best thing for him is to get him some baby Tylenol, a bottle and put him to sleep.� The baby had settled and was only sniffing occasionally.

“Ducky, do you mind watching him ‘till Gibbs gets back? It’s a lot quieter here and if I don’t find out why the FBI are blocking the files to DiNozzo senior, Tony won’t be the one in need of Tylenol.�

“Of course, it would be my pleasure to watch young Anthony here. I have finished my reports and have no new guests to work on. Just send Jethro down when he gets back.�

“Thanks Ducky.� Kate looked to the baby in his arms and smiled - he really was cute.

************************************************************************************************

She had just sat back down at her desk, when a furious looking Gibbs stormed into the pen, walking swiftly towards his desk; he picked up the phone and started to dial furiously.

“I take it things didn’t go well with the BOLO…� Kate muttered to her two team mates, who looked slightly worried.

Gibbs slammed down the phone, hard enough to make the other items on his desk rattle. Damn Fornell wasn’t answering.

“What do you got Kate?�

“Well….I…..Nothing Gibbs.�

“Nothing?� Gibbs voice was shaking with anger

“Well between trying to calm down a screaming baby, who has a temperature and a massive breach of diaper integrity - I didn’t really get much time Gibbs.�

Kate regretted the words before they were even out of her mouth, there was no need to add fuel to the fire with Gibbs �" she was going to regret this.

“Where is Tony?� Gibbs expression and tone softened at the mention of the little boy. This surprised his agents - they were sure Kate was going to get a chewing out.

“He’s down with Ducky, who’s is feeding him and putting him to sleep. He did ask to see you when you came back though.�

“Agent Gibbs,� Director Sheppard’s voice drifted down from the stairs. Gibbs looked up at a stern looking Director with one FBI Agent Tobias Fornell, “I need to speak with you immediately.�

Gibbs sighed, “Kate, Ziva, McGee take a break. You have an hour… Oh and Kate you have three, get some baby things to last the next couple of days - some more clothes, food, a couple of toys whatever he will need till the weekend.�

With that the agents left and Gibbs walked up the stairs towards the director’s office.

*************************************************************************************************

“Agent Gibbs - care to explain what is going on?� Director Sheppard sat across the desk from him, Fornell sat to her right, and they both looked at him expectantly.

Gibbs explained to them about Isabella, about Tony and the information they had found. The Director and Fornell exchanged glances.

“Tobias, care to share why the FBI are blocking our Access to DiNozzo, and why after responding to a BOLO we arrive to find out you have removed…..Everything?� Gibbs tone had lost all politeness at this stage.

“Jethro, we need that information Isabella gave you.� Fornell said, almost hesitantly.

“Why? Give me a good reason to hand all this information over to you. This is our case!� Gibbs was getting angry, this was his case. Okay, so there was no technical connection to the Navy - but still, this was for Isabella, he had to do this.

“I’ll give you a reason,� Fornell said, his face serious, his eyes holding a look of sadness, “That little boy, Isabella’s son - he needs you. He needs you not to be anywhere near this case. YOU need to protect him. DiNozzo senior is a ruthless SOB who will stop at nothing to protect himself and eliminate anyone in his way, and is also extremely possessive - despite the fact that he didn’t treat his son well…�

Gibbs snapped, “Treat him well? That bastard beat that kid, shook him so hard the kid has bruises covering his little body!� He roared.

“Agent Gibbs enough. Hear him out.� Director Shepherd said, kindness in her voice. She was shocked that Gibbs had a wild look in his eye.

Fornell continued, “As I said - DiNozzo is possessive, no one touches what is his - he will hunt that child down and who knows what he will do when he finds him, but it would be nothing good I assure you. Jethro you need to stay clear of this, make sure there is no way for DiNozzo to track you to the case. Protect the boy - and let us handle it.�

Gibbs could see the sense it what Fornell was saying - if he did investigate this case then there was a chance that Tony could be exposed, and he couldn’t take that chance.

Gibbs sighed, “Isabella?� The question came slightly choked out. He didn’t like anyone seeing him show this much emotion, but this was getting to him.

“I’m sorry Jethro; the woman in the taxi was identified as Isabella.� Jenny spoke her voice soft.

“Tell me…�

Fornell spoke up, “As you are probably aware, we have been watching DiNozzo for a while. He has numerous shady looking business deals including what we believe to be a weapons ring - high explosive, high powered weapons being sold to the highest bidder. As yet we have no concrete proof, he is clever, has high powered lawyers and more money than Midas. That combined with the fact people keep disappearing around him has made it impossible to pin anything on him. Every time we get close to pinning the bastard, things shut down; disappear. Which is why we kept his files inaccessible, so no one could get close and spook him before we were ready. Because of this we were also tracking Isabella’s movements; when we saw the BOLO put out by N.C.I.S we knew something was up. So we changed the BOLO to make it so that we were contacted 45 minutes before anyone else, so we could protect her if needed. Unfortunately, we did not get that chance; she was, as you know, shot whilst taking at taxi. Two men on a motorbike drove up behind the taxi, firing twice into the back window. She did not suffer.�

------FLASHBACK------

Gibbs was called in to his CO’s office at 9am on the 29th of February 1991, and was told the news that his wife and only child had been killed. The Earth shattered around him,

“Jethro, they did not suffer.� his CO spoke softly. Gibbs did not hear anything after that. His wife and child were gone, and nothing would bring them back. Slowly he shut down, the walls slamming shut. He was a hollow shell.

------END FLASHBACK------

“DiNozzo, as usual, has covered his ass - he left the country at midnight last night. Isabella was shot at 7.30, and although she didn’t die by his hand we suspect he was heavily involved. We are chasing down the suspects as we speak.� Fornell looked across at Gibbs as the NCIS agent scrubbed a hand down his face.

“Where is DiNozzo now?� A weary tone issued from him, his voice matching his tired eyes.

“We lost him; we have him leaving the country but have been unable to find where he went. Anthony DiNozzo apparently took off from N.Y airport at midnight last night heading for Rome, Italy, with a stopover in London. He got off the plane, but never got back on; no one matching his description was on that flight into Rome. We have every resource available looking for him - all airports in the States are on high alert for him. Iif he tries to come back we will find him.�

“Agent Gibbs,� Jenny looked across to the silent Agent, “You will need to hand all evidence you have acquired on Isabella DiNozzo and Mr. DiNozzo’s business deals over to the FBI, including the DVD and USB drive. The boy is in your custody, the papers you require for the adoption, the bank account details as well as the Lawyers contact numbers will be given to you.�

Gibbs was too tired to be angry at this news, too many emotions running around his head, too many things he now needed to do His main priority was to protect the boy… his son.

Standing up slowly, he walked towards the door, throwing over his shoulder to the Director,

“I’m taking personal leave for 2 weeks - effective immediately.� Without waiting for a reply he headed down to Ducky’s office to collect Tony.

“I hope you can catch this scumbag Fornell. This is in your court now.� Nodding slightly Tobias Fornell left the Director of N.C.I.S pondering her next move.

**************************************************************************************************

Ducky took one look at Gibbs’ face; he instantly knew the news was not good.

“He’s sleeping in my office Jethro.� These were the only words Ducky spoke to the man before him - Gibbs was hurting and from years of experience Dr Mallard knew that now was not the time or the place to discuss such matters. He would make a detour past his dear friend’s house this evening and give him the support he would need.

“Thanks Duck.� Gibbs walked into the dark office; the only sound was the soft breathing of the sleeping baby. Gibbs picked up the little baby cradling him against his chest; sitting down on the couch and, holding the small child lovingly, he just listened to the soft baby breaths and ran fingers through Tony’s soft hair.

Memories were running through his head; wonderful times with his family - Shannon and Isabella sharing jokes, helping each other through good times and bad… Bella’s bright green eyes sparkling with life, her beautiful voice singing various songs to them all... Shannon, looking gorgeous as she did every morning, head on his chest smiling… Kelly playing and laughing happily… Memories so painful they caused his breath to get caught in his chest, tearing at his heart.

After what seemed like an hour, Gibbs spoke softly so as to not awaken the still sleeping child.

“Hey buddy,� His voice was thick with emotion, “I’m sorry, so sorry, for everything you have been through in your short years of life and for not being able to protect your mom. Mommy’s an angle in heaven now, looking over you with your Aunty Shannon and Kelly…� Tears were flowing down Gibbs’ cheeks now.

�Your mommy did what she did to protect you - never forget she loved you. Don’t be scared - you won’t be alone; I’m going to protect you and be the best Daddy I can for you. You will never be alone again…� He paused, “Neither of us will.�

Gibbs had been sitting down in Ducky’s office - thinking for a little over 2 hours, when Tony had begun to stir, making small noises and rubbing his little eyes. He watched as two bright green orbs opened and looked up at him,

“Hey little man, you awake now?� Gibbs watched the little eyes blink before a small smile graced the child’s lips. Gibbs pondered for a moment; most kids who woke up in a strange environment with no one they could recognize would usually whine or cry, not smile �" Isabella had been right. The kid hadn’t been around anyone long enough to form attachment, probably passed from hired help to hired help Gibbs thought sadly.

“What say we go home now?� He asked, and with that Gibbs stood up and walked in to the main part of autopsy.

“Ah Jethro, I see young Anthony is awake,� The elderly M.E walked over and placed a hand on the child’s forehead, “He is much cooler now, that sleep must have done some good,� Ducky looked over at his friend - Jethro looked more relaxed now thank goodness. He guessed that the sleep was good for more than just Anthony, “Did Caitlin mention to you what happened before you arrived?�

“She briefly mentioned something about crying, breaches of nappy integrity and a temperature.� Gibbs thought back to Kate’s little explosion back at the bullpen, - she honestly did look exhausted when he had arrived.

“Well yes, Poor Caitlin was at her whit’s end when she came down here. Anthony did have a temperature and a bit of tummy trouble I would say, but he feels much cooler now. I would recommend keeping some Tylenol at hand however, just in case.�

“Will do Duck. Anyway I had better get this guy home,� Gibbs said, giving a glance at the boy in his arms, “I won’t be in for a few weeks, got some things to sort out now.�

Ducky nodded, “Indeed Jethro. I will stop by after work tonight, to check on young Anthony. It shouldn’t be a late finish tonight, I’m almost done here already.� Ducky didn’t feel the need to add that it was also to check on his friend - Jethro would more than likely state he was fine and shrug off any help. Gibbs was a very private person who didn’t like to show his emotions or open up to people often. Perhaps young Anthony could help change that.

“You should stop by the office before you go - Ziva called looking for you. I did not inform them you were down here, but I did tell them I would send you up if I saw you. I figured you needed some time.�

“Okay, thanks Duck, see you tonight.� And with that Gibbs left autopsy and headed towards the bull pen.

*************************************************************************************************

Up at the bullpen, Ziva, McGee and Kate �" who was now back from her baby shopping - were quietly discussing the day’s events. Ziva and McGee had seen Gibbs leave the director’s office looking less than impressed, and had wisely decided to give the man some space. Not long after that Kate came back with some baby supplies, and they filled her in on what they knew - which wasn’t much. They had just settled down to work when the Director, followed by Agent Fornell, interrupted them.

“Agents Todd, McGee, Officer David. The Isabella DiNozzo case is being handed over to the FBI, you need to give all evidence acquired over to Agent Fornell, including the DVD and USB,� Director Sheppard looked at the confused faces of the agents before continuing, “Agent McGee I need you to give a copy of the Adoption papers and the personal account details on the USB over to Agent Gibbs, as well as the contact information for the Lawyer Isabella mentioned. You may then head home; you’re all on mandatory 2 weeks leave. Enjoy the time off.�

“Director Sheppard, Gibbs is aware of the case handover, yes?� Ziva whose face had remained impassive despite her confusion, asked.

“He is aware.� And without so much as an explanation, Director Sheppard headed back to her office, contemplating if she had made the right choice. Gibbs’ team was by far the best team they had - their closure rates were the highest and they all seemed to complement each other with their different strengths and worked well under Gibbs. The team had been working non stop for the last 6 months; first with the drug trafficking ring discovered aboard the USS Seahawk, then there was that mess with terrorist Ari Haswari which had become Gibbs’ own private obsession. Yes, the team needed this break.

After handing the information over to Fornell; Ziva, McGee and Kate started to get ready to leave.

“Where is Gibbs?� Kate asked, “I have to give him all this stuff for Tony.� Kate pointed to the numerous bags on her desk.

“We don’t really know, we saw him leave the Director’s office and haven’t seen him since,� McGee said as he walked over to Kate’s desk and looked into the bags, “Wow Kate, didn’t Gibbs say just to get what he would need to look after Tony till the weekend? That’s only 2 days away, and there are 20 changes of clothes in here.�

“You saw the orange mush incident McGee, not to mention the diaper problem while you guys were out. I figured the kid was probably pretty messy. Plus the little clothes and toys are so cute.� Kate crooned sharing a smile with Ziva as the women started up a discussion on all the cute things Kate had brought. They were going to love having a baby to spoil. McGee rolled his eyes.

The ping of the elevator announced Gibbs’ arrival to the bullpen. He strolled over to his agents’ desks carting little Tony, who was sucking his pacifier contently. He raised a quizzical eyebrow to the three agents standing around Kate’s desk with their bags packed to leave.

“Did I miss something?� Gibbs asked the three. Knowing what Gibbs was getting at, Ziva spoke,

“The director has instructed us that we are to take 2 weeks leave starting today. We were just waiting to see you before we left. McGee has the adoption papers, bank account details and the contact number for the lawyer. Kate has the stuff you needed for Tony.�

Gibbs handed Tony to McGee and looked in the bags on Kate’s desk. Kate had brought numerous sets of clothes, toys, a few blankets, diapers and wipes, more of that jarred mush and bath products - including a little seat for the bath that you could pop the baby in to stop him slipping into the water whilst leaving your hands free. There was also some baby strength Tylenol. Deciding to give Tony some now, Gibbs took the dropper and gave some to him whilst McGee kept him still.

“That’s good work Kate.� Gibbs gave her one of his rare compliments. He was about to say something else, when McGee interrupted.

“Ouch!� He cried, rubbing his eye, which had just been jabbed by the baby’s stubby finger. Tony’s childish giggles sounded through the bull pen, “He just poked me in the eye!� McGee whined

“He is just a baby McGee, I am sure it was just an accident, yes?� Ziva smiled, trying to stifle a laugh. They all looked at Tony who was giggling, his eyes shining brightly. He raised his little hand and patted McGee on the face gently.

“See,� Kate said hiding her smile, “He is sorry.�

“Ouch!� McGee cried again, as the baby finger once again found its way to his eye.

Tony was again giggling loudly and clapping his hands. He reached a little hand up to McGee’s eye to give it another poke when Gibbs caught his hand gently.

“No, Tony. That’s not nice.� Gibbs said softly, before taking Tony away from McGee. The baby looked a little upset that his game of eye poking had been stopped, but was soon burbling away again, trying to have a conversation with Kate.

The agents had all decided to leave the bullpen together and help Gibbs to his car with Tony and the extra bags of stuff.

“Umm Boss,� Stammered McGee, as the agents loaded the bags and Tony in to the car, “I got the guys in the tech garage to bolt the baby seat in your car with the proper restraints, so it’s all ready to go.�

“Good work McGee.� Gibbs gave a small smile; he was impressed with his team’s forethought. Gibbs climbed into his car saying goodbye to his agents.

“Bye Gibbs, enjoy your time off.� Kate said, blowing a kiss to Tony in the back.

“See ya Boss.� McGee waved,

“Goodbye Gibbs, Tony, we shall see you soon.� Ziva smiled at the sight as Gibbs drove off.

*************************************************************************************************

The trip home was uneventful; Tony was in the back chirping baby gibberish - the occasional word ‘Car’ being heard and lots of ‘ooohh’s - whilst Gibbs was deep in thought. He was thinking about all the things he would need to do over the next few days; he had to sort out some kind of nursery, get more baby supplies and call the lawyer and hopefully meet up with her sooner rather than later. All of this on top of looking after a child, Gibbs was beginning to doubt if this was such a good idea. He had the experience with Kelly, but with Kelly he had Shannon. They both complimented each other and relied on each other when bringing her up. This time he was alone.

Gibbs’ thoughts were interrupted by a loud squeal coming from the back seat. Looking in his rear-view mirror at Tony he saw the kid was squealing with delight. Tony had obviously grabbed inside one of the bags Kate had brought and was now ripping up paper and throwing it about the car, waving his little arms about, his face pure concentration when a piece of paper with tape on it became stuck to his little hands. Gibbs laughed to himself, he remembered Kelly at this age, laughter and smiles and boy could she throw a temper - he hoped Bella’s little boy was not the same.

Pulling up into his driveway at home, Gibbs got out of the car and opened the front door. He decided it would be easier to unload the car whilst Tony was still in his seat so he quickly brought everything inside, putting it all on the kitchen table before whisking the kid inside. Gibbs scouted around the first level of his house; baby in arms, and closed the doors to the spare room and bathroom. Stopping at the door that lead to his beloved basement he closed it gently, thinking about the baby proofing he would need to do. Once the initial sweep of the area had been done and it all looked relatively safe for Tony, Gibbs gently popped the baby on the floor of the lounge room and walked over to the kitchen table to unpack the bags. The first level of Gibbs’ house was rather open plan, meaning he could see Tony at all times from anywhere he was. Tony was crawling around on the floor exploring his new home as Gibbs unpacked the baby’s things; Kate sure had brought a lot of stuff.

Gibbs had almost finished unpacking the bags; there was only one left when he heard a noise.

THUD. He looked up to see Tony, who had pulled himself into a standing position using the coffee table. He was using one hand to hold himself up, the other to throw books and magazines unceremoniously on to the floor. THUD, there went a book, THUD, another one.

Gibbs smiled - at least he wasn’t breaking anything…..Rrrip. “Tony, NO!� Gibbs raced over to the baby who had plopped back to the floor and started tearing pages out of the nearest book. Gibbs took the book off him and picked the rest up from the floor, placing them on a higher cabinet. Tony looked up at him, smiled, and started to crawl away quickly heading for the kitchen. The Tylenol and the sleep obviously had helped the little boy - a lot. Gibbs scooped him up and spun him in the air a bit, little giggles filling the house.

“Ok, I guess we better give you something you can play with… hey!� Gibbs got an idea and rummaged around the last unpacked bag. He produced a bucket full of wooden blocks, and sat on the floor with Tony in his lap. They began to play. After about an hour of Gibbs building towers and Tony bashing them down and laughing, Gibbs looked at the time. It was now 5.15pm. He sighed and got up from the floor, leaving Tony playing with the blocks and went to the kitchen to start dinner.

Dr Mallard opened the door to his friend’s house. Walking inside, his ears were assaulted by some very loud banging coming from the kitchen,

“Jethro!� He called loudly over the top of the noise,

“In here Duck.� Ducky walked into the kitchen to find a very tired looking Jethro making dinner, and little Anthony sitting on the kitchen floor with a plastic container on his head, banging some pots with a wooden spoon.

“My, My, what do we have here?� Ducky exclaimed, lifting the little boy into his arms.

“What do you think of my early warning system Duck?�

“Early warning system?� Ducky asked, his eyebrows rose in question.

“Yeah, while he is banging on these,� Gibbs said pointing to the pots, “I know where he is and what he is doing. It’s when he stops I have to worry.� He chuckled.

“I see. You wouldn’t be causing trouble would you young Anthony? How has he been Jethro? He’s feeling a little warm again.�

“He’s been good Duck, started getting a little grizzly about 10 minutes ago. He last had some Tylenol about 5 hours ago, so he is due for more now I think.� Gibbs ran a hand through Tony soft hair. The baby looked over to him smiling, and rubbing his eyes.

“I’ll give him another dose for you now, shall I?� Ducky made his way towards the kitchen counter where he spied the bottle. Measuring out the correct dose he gave it to Anthony who pulled a face, “I guess it isn’t the nicest taste.� The elderly man laughed.

“Staying for dinner Duck? I made plenty of soup,� Gibbs took Tony into his arms, “We can eat first, I’ll feed Tony after. What, with last time I’ll probably need to wash up as much as he will after.� Gibbs smirked.

Knocking sounded from the front door �" “Who is it?� Gibbs exclaimed as Ducky disappeared around the corner to open the door.

“Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs, where is he?� Gibbs heard Abby before he saw her, bounding into the kitchen and hoisting Tony into the air.

“Careful Abbs, he hasn’t been well, you don’t want him throwing up on you do you?� Gibbs laughed at the enthusiastic Goth who sheepishly cuddled the baby. Tony looked a bit bemused at what had just happened and looked at Gibbs with big eyes.

“Yeah Abbs,� The voice of Tim McGee came from the door, “He already pooped on Kate.�

“He did not poop on me, McGee.� Kate snapped,

“But he did, McGee, almost stab out your eye - twice.� Laughed Ziva,

“It’s poke, Ziva.� McGee corrected,

“Poke, stab - either way it hurt yes?�

The three agents appeared in the kitchen while McGee was carrying a highchair

“Hey Boss, Gibbs.� They said in unison. Gibbs looked at them, raising an eyebrow.

“They told me what happened today, well actually Timmy told me,� Abby piped up from where she was sitting with Tony, “We thought the highchair might come in handy, especially after Ziva had mentioned what happened at the last feeding session.� Abby giggled and tickled Tony who responded with peels of laughter.

Looking around the kitchen, Kate spoke, “Sorry Gibbs, we didn’t know we had interrupted dinner, we had all already eaten and we didn’t think….�

Ducky cut her off, “Nonsense Caitlin, there was no interruption at all, in fact it’s good you’re here. Now we can eat and you can all watch Anthony. Isn’t that right Jethro?� Ducky looked at Gibbs with a glare that said ‘don’t you disagree.’

“Yeah, sure.� Gibbs said quickly. The younger agents weren’t confused about the gruff ex-marine being ordered around by the elderly M.E. There were only two people that could order Gibbs around and get away with it, and they were both currently in the room.

“Great!� Yelled Abby, startling the boy in her arms, “Sorry baby,� She hastily said when she felt the little boy jump.

“We can feed him while you guys eat.� Kate said, taking Tony out of Abby’s arms and placing him in the highchair, which McGee had already set up

“Just give him some of the soup we’re having, it’s just potato and leek but watch it - it will be hot.� Gibbs said. At this point it was just easier to let them at it, especially Abby. He knew how hard it was to detract from her when she got this excited.

Gibbs and Ducky ate in silence as they watched the three agents and one very over caffeinated forensic scientist feeding the baby. Kate, Ziva and Abby each had a spoon and were taking turns feeding him. Kate was making Car and Airplane noises, whilst saying, ‘Open up’. Ziva was commenting on how eating up would make Tony, ‘A big strong boy’. And Abby was saying ‘Mmmm’ and ‘Yummy’. Poor McGee was left holding the food looking slightly scared of the three women before him who had gone so gooey over the baby. Tony for his part sat there happily opening his little mouth to the food, saying ‘Mmmmm’ and clapping his hands thoroughly enjoying the attention.

Once dinner was over Ducky instructed Gibbs to go bath Tony - who was again, for some reason, covered in his food - whilst everyone else cleaned up. Gibbs was too tired physically and mentally to object with the elderly M.E and insist he was capable of doing things on his own - after being up since 3am and the emotional rollercoaster ride that ensued, he was ready to crash. Taking the items he would need to the upstairs bathroom he drew the bath.

“Ok buddy, bath time. Lets get you all clean for the ladies downstairs� Gibbs smiled stripping the clothes and diaper off the grubby little boy, placing the bath seat in and testing the water, before sitting Tony in the seat gently. Tony was splashing the water softly as Gibbs soaped him up. Kate had brought some special organic baby wash stuff that Gibbs had never heard of before, but it smelt pretty good. Gibbs washed his hair and gently removed all the food from his little face and let him splash about for a few minutes, with Gibbs occasionally splashing the baby back. After making sure the boy was properly dried, Gibbs turned away to look for the clean diaper. Finding it he turned around in time to see a naked bottom crawling out the door. Gibbs stood, his knees cracking,

“I’m getting too old for this…� He grumbled, before going to find Tony.

After finally managing to get the baby dressed into his sleeper suit, expertly picked out by Abby, he bore the baby back into the main living area of the house. The kitchen was clean, dishwasher was on, and everyone was sitting in the lounge talking quietly. Gibbs walked across the room and flopped onto the free armchair, Tony cuddling up into his chest and rubbing his eyes tiredly.

After a brief conversation on the day’s events, Gibbs moved to the kitchen to get a bottle ready for Tony. It was now 9.30pm and he should really be getting Tony off to sleep. Ziva stood,

“It is getting late, we should go now.� She spoke softly.

The others agreed, “Well Bossman we will be off now, but we’ll all see you 10am tomorrow morning.� Abby said, enthusiasm in her voice.

“Tomorrow?� Gibbs looked at the people in his now full lounge room.

“Yeah, tomorrow Bossman. We have lots to do! A whole nursery to set up - and more baby goods to buy! We’ve already discussed it. You need Kate, Ziva and I to decorate the nursery, Timmy to carry the bags, and Ducky to keep you well caffeinated. And, of course, you need to come to pay.� Abby said with a cheeky smile, knowing full well that Gibbs couldn’t say no to her. Without leaving Gibbs time to argue, they all called their goodnights and left.

Gibbs returned to the lounge room, sitting on the big sofa and started to feed Tony; whose eyes were drooping slowly closed. Ducky stood from where he was seated,

“I’ll make coffee,� Ducky said as he stood - he still wanted to have words with his friend, “You know Jethro, this evening reminds me of a time when I was much younger...� Ducky began to tell his story as he walked to the kitchen. Gibbs laid down on the sofa with Tony curled up on his chest and zoned out on Ducky’s story, concentrating of the soft sucking noise Tony was making as he drank, his little eyes closed and his little hands grabbing gently at Gibb’s shirt. Gibbs smiled contently.

“And so you see, the old General was right.� Ducky finished his story as he walked into the lounge room. He tutted softly and smiled. He had always wanted to be a Grandfather, and the sight before him reminded him of this. Gibbs had fallen asleep on the sofa with little Anthony also asleep, snuggled into his chest - empty bottle hanging from his mouth. Ducky went to the kitchen and tipped out the coffee - the conversation could wait. Returning to the lounge room he covered his sleeping friend and the small child with a blanket, removed the bottle from Anthony’s little mouth, and left.

Taking one last look at the heart-warming sight he closed the door gently. They would need all the rest they could get �" tomorrow was going to be a busy day.

Shannon was in the kitchen cooking up a storm, delicious smells wafting throughout the house. Today was Kelly’s 5th birthday and Shannon was busily getting ready for a family dinner. Jethro was outside playing with his little girl, squeals of delight could be heard as he hoisted his daughter into the air.

“Again Daddy, do it again…Higher!� Kelly’s voice was so bright, happy and full of life as Jethro hoisted her into the air once more. Going back into the house with Kelly, Jethro felt Shannon’s arms embrace him, before leaning in to kiss him passionately.

“Ewww.. Mum, Dad that’s gross.� Kelly giggled as they scooped her into their arms and started to tickle their little girl. Jethro smiled. This was life, this was living. This was love.

The scene before him melted away, He was now in a graveyard - opposite him were the headstones of his beloved Shannon and Kelly. He could still hear Kelly’s laughter, but it was hauntingly hollow.

“Where were you Daddy?� Kelly’s voice was drifting from somewhere, “We needed you, Mummy and I. Why didn’t you come back?� Jethro’s breath hitched in his throat, his body began to shake as he stared at the headstones in front of him, “Why did you leave us? Kelly’s voice was getting more forceful; and tears were sliding down Jethro’s face.

“I’m sorry, so sorry.� Jethro yelled out into the emptiness of the graveyard his voice gravely and thick with emotion. “I failed you both, I’m sorry.�

Kelly’s face appeared in front of him - she was crying heart wrenching sobs, “Why didn’t you protect us Daddy?�

**************************************************************************************************

Gibbs woke, taking in his surrounding as he did so. He had obviously fallen asleep on the sofa last night. His mind was still a bit fuzzy from his nightmare; echo’s of Kelly’s heart breaking sobs were still haunting him, they sounded so real, even now that he had woken the sobbing hadn’t dissipated.

It was then that Gibbs realized the sobbing he heard was real, and was coming from the little boy curled up on his chest. Slowly sitting upright and cuddling Tony gently he whispered soft comforting words into his ear, running a hand through his hair fondly. Feeling the child’s forehead Gibbs was relieved that Tony no longer had a temperature; he did however have a rather full, rather smelly diaper.

“This,� He said to the baby in his arms, tapping the diaper gently, “Is enough to make anyone cry.� It had definitely got to be uncomfortable for the kid. Taking Tony to the bathroom to change him, Gibbs glanced at the clock in the kitchen,

“Atta boy Tony.� Gibbs exclaimed when he saw the time - it was 8am; the kid had slept through the night without so much as a peep, allowing Gibbs to have some much needed rest, the fact that it was 8am before Gibbs himself had awoken was testament in itself as to how tired he was. After another struggle to try and keep Tony still whilst changing his diaper and his clothes, Gibbs brought Tony back into the kitchen.

“What should we get you for breakfast, little man?� Gibbs asked, mainly to himself, “Some more mush? … No, Oatmeal? ....No….I know toast. Plain toast, with butter.� Tony looked at him innocence written all over his face, his eyes gleaming as Gibbs placed Tony into the highchair, “Even you can’t make a mess with toast, right?�

WRONG. 20 minutes later Gibbs was running an exasperated hand down his face - how can a child who can’t even get out of his highchair make so much mess? It was toast, buttered toast; Gibbs had even cut it into little triangles to make it easier for the boy. He stood in front of Tony who had soggy bits of mashed up toast stuck in his hair, drool and butter covering his clothes. There were little buttered finger prints spread as far as the little arms could reach, bits of soggy toast had been flung onto the kitchen table and the floor, some even making it over to the rug in the lounge room. There was still a bit which was mangled in Tony’s fist, and Tony was currently trying to put his fist with toast into his mouth.

“Taa,� Gibbs said, whilst taking the slobbery mashed bit of toast from Tony, “How much did you actually eat, and how much is spread over the room?� Gibbs sighed and opted to leave Tony in his highchair while he cleaned up the mess, Tony was kicking his legs, giggling and babbling away. “You’re a grubby boy.� Gibbs spoke with affectionin his voice. The kid sure could make a mess; it seemed every time he ate he got covered in his food and half of it usually ended up over the floor.

Once Gibbs had finally finished cleaning up, he looked over at Tony who was trying to wriggle his way out of his chair.

“Tony,� Gibbs called his name softly, making the kid stop squirming and look up at him, eyes shining brightly. He held his arms out to Gibbs, clearly wanting the older man to pick him up, “Ok, up we go.� Gibbs lifted Tony out of the chair and took him upstairs to change his clothes for the second time in an hour.

It was lucky, Gibbs thought, that Kate had gotten so many clothes for the kid - at this rate he would be out of them before tomorrow. Once again changed in clean clothing, Gibbs sat Tony in the lounge room with the wooden blocks from yesterday, and a few of the plastic cars that Kate had also brought. It was a good thing the cars were large enough that Tony couldn’t swallow them, as he had already tried putting one in his mouth.

Sitting on the sofa watching Tony play happily, Gibbs got a notepad and pen and started writing all the things he needed to get for the kid, plus all the baby proofing he still needed to do; the list was getting long.

Gibbs stopped what he was doing and looked up, as the front door of his house opened and his team walked in. They all looked a little anxious upon entering the house, with the exception of Abby who bounced over and kissed him on the cheek.

“Hi Boss, Gibbs, Bossman.� His visitors chorused at once, as they made their way into the lounge room.

“Abbs weren’t you supposed to be back at work today?� Gibbs said as he motioned his team to sit.

“Well…..I kinda negotiated with the director so I could have time off till after the weekend. I figured you needed help with Tony…. I mean not that you haven’t had experience with babies. Just that this time you would be on you own….. Not that I wanted to bring up your past or anything or make you think about it…but…�

“Abbs,� Gibbs warned. Obviously the others had filled Abby in on Shannon and Kelly, and how he had ended up with Tony.

“Sorry Bossman. So yeah, anyways the Director gave in, and here I am. I can’t wait. Fun with babies!� Abby was practically bouncing in her seat. Gibbs couldn’t help but smirk at the enthusiasm of the young woman before him.

“Ducky will be here soon, he also requested some time off for a few days.� Kate said watching as Tony pulled himself up to stand using the furniture as support as he made his way around the room. He wasn’t walking unaided but Kate hazarded a guess it wouldn’t be long before he was, and then Gibbs would have real trouble on his hands.

Gibbs left the team to watch Tony, while he showered and changed. On returning to the lounge room he stopped at the doorway and watched with amusement. His team were currently sitting on the floor, while Tony, pacifier in his mouth was crawling between them handing them different toys, they each took the toys with a ‘Thanks’ as Tony giggled and moved on to the next person.

“It’s a nice sight, isn’t it Jethro?� Dr Mallard spoke quietly as he stood next to his friend.

“Yeah Duck, it is,� Gibbs smiled watching the little boy, his son, as he made his agents smile; they all looked relaxed in his little presence, “How long have you been here?�

“Not long my dear friend, just enough time to admire the sight.� Ducky said pointing to the game going on in the lounge room. He paused for a moment, “How are you holding up Jethro?�

Gibbs looked at his friend, hoping he had managed to cover up the pain he felt, ‘Why didn’t you protect us daddy’ the haunting memories of the nightmare flashed before him. “I’m fine Duck.� He said, a little too quickly, but Ducky didn’t question him further; he would let it go for now.

“What’s going on here?� Gibbs asked, humor in his voice. His agents looked at him, looking slightly embarrassed, Abby grinning from ear to ear. Tony, upon hearing Gibbs’ voice, stopped trying to feed Ziva his car, smiled and crawled over to where he was standing. Gibbs scooped him up,

“Ok buddy, you ready to go?� Tony burbled away, looking like he was really trying to talk to Gibbs, as Kate put socks and tiny baby sneakers on him.

Tim McGee, who had been rather quiet since his arrival, spoke up, “Do you think we should, maybe, bring a change of clothes for him? You know, just in case.�

“That’s a good idea Timmy!� Abby squealed as she ran past Gibbs and Tony to grab a change of clothes from upstairs. Gibbs was sure they would need them.

**************************************************************************************************
The drive to the mall went past rather quickly. Even though Gibbs had slowed his driving pace he had still managed to beat Abby by a full 5 minutes. Gibbs had already gotten Tony out of his car seat and was grabbing the baby bag, when Abby pulled up next to them in her hearse �" it was decided they would bring Abby’s car as it had the advantage of the extra room in the back.

“So, Boss what’s the plan today?� McGee asked hesitantly as he got out of the car. He wasn’t used to dealing with his boss outside of work and really wasn’t sure how to react to his boss, who seemed somewhat more tolerant with the kid around.

“Well McGee, I have a list of stuff I need - we’ll split into teams, grab the stuff and go.� Gibbs explanation was brief and to the point, but he was a little distracted by Tony, who kept shoving his toy car in his face saying ‘car’ as he did so.

“You make this sound like a mission Gibbs.� Kate smirked as she and Ziva got out of the back seat of Abby’s car.

Gibbs didn’t answer his agent, instead fixing her with one of his glares, which Kate found hard to take seriously as Tony, who had given up on trying to ‘share’ his car with Gibbs was now trying to ‘share’ his pacifier with him instead.

Gibbs was indeed in full mission mode as he barked out orders. “Abby, McGee, you two are on clothes and toy recon - this is your list,� Gibbs paused for a minute before adding, “Abbs, don’t get carried away, ok?�

“Sir, yes sir!� Abby mock saluted him and grabbed McGee’s arm

“On it Boss.� McGee said, looking a little unsure as he took one of his boss’ credit cards.

“Kate, Ziva, you two are on nursery decorating. Here is a list of things I need and whatever else you can think of.� Kate and Ziva exchanged smiles as Gibbs handed them another of his credit cards.

“Gibbs, may we take Tony with us?� Ziva asked, her dark eyes dancing as she watched the little boy cuddle up to her boss.

“Ok but watch him closely, look after him, and call me if you need anything.� Gibbs said, ruffling Tony’s hair as he handed him and the baby bag to Ziva.

“The first thing we need to get then, is a baby stroller� remarked Kate.

“Ducky and I will get the nursery furniture; we’ll all meet back at the food court at 1300hrs.� Watching his team go, Gibbs was hoping he would find the things he needed quickly and could sit down with a cup or two off coffee before having to meet everyone. He wanted the time to go quickly so he could have Tony back, although he had only had Tony for a little over a day the kid was growing on him rapidly and he found that he already missed the little boy.

The time did indeed go quickly and Gibbs had even been able to have his caffeine fix. Ducky and himself were situated quite comfortably at the Starbucks in the food court, a spot where Gibbs was sure the team would look for him. Abby and McGee arrived right on 1300, although he could barely see McGee under all the bags he carried.

“Good thing we brought your car Abbs, at least you should be able to fit all this in it, although there may not be any room for anyone else’s things.� Gibbs’ tone was one of amusement as McGee tried to place all the bags neatly on the floor, before sinking into a chair with a tired sigh.

“What about your stuff Gibbs, did you forget you were actually supposed to get furniture?� Abby asked with mock annoyance, as she took in the only bag Gibbs had, which was quite small.

“Of course not Abigail my dear, the furniture will be arriving at Jethro’s around 1530 today.� Ducky spoke whilst sipping his tea.

“I’m getting coffee, anyone want any?� McGee asked. Abby and Gibbs answered in the affirmative, “I’ll grab one for Ziva and Kate too then.� McGee walked towards the counter.

“Speaking of Kate and Ziva, where are they?� Gibbs looked at his watch, 1320, he was starting to get slightly worried and was contemplating ringing Kate and Ziva when he saw them coming towards him. They had a trolley full of items, but what caught Gibbs attention was Tony. The little boy was in his spare change of clothes - not entirely surprising, his shoes and socks were missing �" interesting, and upon seeing Gibbs his eyes lit up and his little arms stretched out trying to grab the older man. Gibbs scooped Tony up and the little boy immediately snuggled into Gibbs chest tapping his little hand softly on Gibbs face.

“Looks like someone missed you, Gibbs.� Kate said with a chuckle, noticing the happy smiles on her friend’s faces as they watched Gibbs with his new son.

*************************************************************************************************

The rest of the afternoon went past quickly. Tony had fallen asleep on the way home and had slept for 4hrs, his little body still recovering from the trauma he suffered the day before, not to mention being unwell. Ducky had assured Gibbs that it was quite alright. Tony’s sleep had given Gibbs and the team enough time to sort out the nursery and to put up some baby gates in the lounge room. Gibbs stood back to admire the nursery, it had already been a cream room with pale blue feature wall, but now instead of boxes and junk it had been cleaned out and now held a dark wooden crib and change table, with a matching chest of drawers and a very comfy looking armchair. Kate and Ziva had done a good job in finding cute little dragon themed paraphernalia, little dragon bedding, a lamp, and matching pictures among the items. Gibbs sighed and gave a soft smile.

-----------FLASHBACK------------

It had taken Shannon 3 hours in the paint store to pick out the perfect shade of pink for their little girl’s nursery - from the minute Shannon and Jethro had found out they were having a girl, Shannon had gone into pink overdrive.

“Ok,� Shannon said to her husband, as she opened the tin of paint in the middle of the nursery, “Here is the winner, its called Fairy floss pink. I’m thinking we leave these three walls cream, and this one,� Shannon said, pointing to a large blank wall, “This one will be the wonderful pink feature wall.� Shannon’s eyes were gleaming; she was beaming with enthusiasm as she hugged her husband in a close embrace. Well - as close as she could get with her huge swollen belly.

“I can’t wait to see it all finished.� She said, handing him the paint brushes and bounding out of the room, closing the door to the room behind her and leaving a stunned Jethro in her wake.

3 days later and the nursery was finished, Shannon had wonderful taste and had made sure everything matched, right down to the two little lambs with pink bows she had skillfully painted onto one of the cream walls. The couple stood happily in the doorway admiring their work… well, Shannon’s work really - all Jethro had done was paint the pink wall and put together the furniture. Shannon had insisted on it being a surprise for him, and it was. Jethro lent down to kiss his wife when she gasped.

“Oh my…Um Jethro, it’s time, my water just broke!�

--------------END FLASHBACK---------------------

Gibbs was brought out of his memories by Tony’s baby chirpings coming from the lounge room. Ducky and Ziva were in the kitchen preparing dinner and McGee, Abby and Kate were sitting playing with Tony.

“Hey Bossman, can he talk much?� Abby asked inquisitively about Tony, who was crawling all over her lap and throwing blocks at McGee.

“He doesn’t say much Abbs, the only words I have heard him say were ’Bub, bub’ and of course his favorite word………�

“Car.� Kate and McGee chimed in.

“So he doesn’t say Da-Da or Ma-Ma� Abby asked patting Tony’s soft hair and twirling the blonde curls in her fingers.

“No Abbs, no one ever taught him how. Isabella couldn’t, and Mr. DiNozzo would never deserve the title.� Gibbs spat out DiNozzo Senior’s name with hatred.

“Ok then Tony,� Abby smiled as the little boy looked up at her upon hearing his name, “Can you say masspectrometer? Go on you can do it, ma-spec-tro-meter…..�

“Oh oh, how about Coffee? Cof-fee.� Kate said laughing.

“Or Gibbs-slap.� McGee added.

“How about we start with something easier, yes? How about Boat?� Ziva spoke as Gibbs’ team cracked up with laughter, even Gibbs couldn’t hide his smile. Tony looked confused; he of course had no idea what they were going on about.

“Let’s just stick with da-da for now,� Gibbs said, picking Tony up and twirling him in the air, before cuddling him gently and saying, “Da-da.�

“Car.� Tony said, showing Gibbs his car. The team laughed again.

Abby, McGee and Kate spent the last 30 minutes before dinner trying to get Tony to say ‘Da-Da’ which was rather unsuccessful, while Gibbs helped Ziva and Ducky with dinner. Dinner was a wonderful affair, and Gibbs found the mood was quite relaxed, the conversation was rather pleasant and they were all watching Tony’s antics as he ate, Gibbs was prepared this time, he put a large plastic sheet on the floor under the highchair and covered Tony completely with a large towel.

“Tony, no!� Gibbs said with frustration as the little boy began putting the food in his hair.

“Do not worry Gibbs, I shall bathe him� Ziva said, standing and picking Tony up to take him to the bathroom. Tony looked at Gibbs smiled, and threw a pea at him. Abby, Kate and McGee laughed.

“My, my Jethro I do believe young Anthony is going to be quite a handful. He is already a very cheeky little boy� The M.E’s eyes were sparkling with humor. Gibbs just grunted.

The team cleaned up, whilst Ziva bathed Tony. They could hear happy squeals coming from the boy upstairs and exasperated sighs and what was probably Hebrew curse words from Ziva as she tried to get his clothes on. Ziva eventually brought Tony back down to the lounge room where everyone was waiting. The weather was getting cooler so she had dressed Tony in a pair of fleecy navy blue and white winter pajamas, with a picture of a red car on the front, his blonde hair slightly darker due to the dampness and curling endearingly.

“Oh, he looks so cute.� Kate said to Abby upon seeing Tony walk into the lounge room, two little fists grabbing onto Ziva’s fingers. He was slowly taking steps towards where Gibbs was sitting as Ziva helped him.

Gibbs crouched on the ground arms open calling to Tony, �Come on Tony, come here…� He said softly to the boy, Tony laughed and slowly let go of Ziva’s fingers, reaching out towards Gibbs, he took one slow, shaky step…..

“He did it!� Screeched Abby, “He took his first step!�

Abbys loud voice startled Tony and he fell with a thump onto the floor, bumping his head on the corner of the coffee table with a resounding ‘whack’ as he did so….

Silence… 1,2,3……. Tony held his breath, then let out a loud scream. Gibbs rushed to pick Tony up, the poor little boy was screaming, tears pouring down his cheeks. Gibbs could already see the lump and bruise forming on his little head - his face was going red as he held his breath again and continued screaming. The agents looked shocked, and Abby looked as though she would burst into tears herself. Ducky for his part had come to stand next to his friend and with gentle hands has checked over the poor boy, noticing the growing lump.

Abby stood to give Tony a hug, reaching out to take him from Gibbs, but Tony wasn’t having a bar of that - seeing Abby reaching out to him, he screamed harder and clung to Gibbs for all he was worth, burying his head further into Gibbs’ neck.

“I…I’m sorry,� Abby said as she started to sniffle, “I didn’t mean… I’m sorry baby!� Tim and Ducky coaxed Abby onto the sofa, Kate gave her a hug, and Ziva went to make her a cup of hot chocolate.

Gibbs had retreated with Tony into the nursery and sat down on the armchair with him, rubbing his back, bouncing him in his arms and whispering soothing words,

“It’s ok baby, it’s ok. Daddy’s here… Shhh…..Daddy’s here Tony…� After about an hour of screaming and crying, Tony had calmed down. He was hiccoughing and sniffling slightly, and rubbing his tired eyes. All his screaming and crying had exhausted the poor boy, and he felt a little warm; but whether that was from not feeling well or his crying, Gibbs couldn’t tell, although he was pretty sure it was from the latter.

His little eyes were closing, snapping open again as his head drooped forward. Gibbs stood and lay him down in his crib, tucking the soft sheets over him running his hand through the soft curls.

--------------FLASHBACK-----------------

The first night Shannon and Gibbs brought Kelly home, Shannon was exhausted.

Gibbs had offered to put Kelly to bed after her feed, while Shannon had a relaxing soaking bath, Shannon had agreed and handed the tiny almost sleeping baby over to him, kissing her forehead, before leaving the nursery and heading to the bathroom.

Jethro looked down at his precious bundle, his beautiful little girl; she was so tiny, so small, he was afraid he would break her. Holding her gently he just watched her, listening to the soft baby breaths and watching as her eyes drooped closed. Placing her into her crib and covering her tenderly, Gibbs grabbed a paper bag from the dresser in the room and opened it. Removing a small fuzzy pink bear from inside, he looked at it. He had spent the best part of an hour choosing his gift for his new daughter while he had been waiting for Shannon and Kelly to be released form the hospital. He had finally found the perfect bear. This was his special gift to his daughter and he was proud.

Walking back over to the crib, he placed the little bear inside and whispered “Sleepy girl, close your eyes. Daddy’s right here beside you. Close you eyes close them tight, may you wake with morning light…. Goodnight Kells, I love you always and forever.�

---------END FLASHBACK--------------------

Gibbs remembered the rhyme well; his mother had said it to him every night when he was little. And he had said that same little rhyme every night to Kelly. Shannon used to say when he was away Kelly would say it to herself before she went to sleep; it was her way of always having her daddy with her. He vowed to himself that if he and Shannon ever had other children that he would say the same thing to them so that he would be close to them wherever he was.

Gibbs stopped patting Tony’s head and walked over to the dresser, removing a small paper bag. Opening it up, he lifted a small soft toy dog, a Labrador pup. Sighing softly he remembered something that Isabella had said to him years ago before she left for Long island.

“Do not count what you have lost. Just see what you have now, because the past never comes back, but sometimes the future can give you back some of the things you lost…. Like your ability to love.�

Walking back over to Tony’s crib, Gibbs placed the toy next to Tony and whispered, “Sleepy boy, close your eyes. Daddy’s right here beside you. Close you eyes close them tight, may you wake with morning light…. Goodnight Tony, I love you always and forever.� A tear slid down Gibbs cheek, and as Tony reached out to hold his hand he swore he heard the little boy mumble…

“Da-Da�.

Tony had a new favorite word.

“DA-DA!� He yelled happily from his crib in the nursery, “DA, DA, DA, DA, DA!� Calling at the top of his voice as Gibbs entered the room. It had been a week since what Abby called ‘the walking incident’ had happened, a week since Tony had first said ‘Da-Da’ and now he was saying it constantly and every time Gibbs heard Tony say it his heart swelled with pride.

Gibbs grinned when he saw Tony standing up, holding the side of the crib, his eyes sparkling. Tony clapped his hands and held them out for Gibbs to pick him up.

“Da-Da!�

“Good morning smiley boy, you finally awake now?� Gibbs said, picking the baby up and changing his diaper, before bringing him downstairs. Breakfast had become a routine that Gibbs thoroughly enjoyed; he placed Tony in his highchair and went to get the boy some oatmeal.

“Da-Da!� Tony called, when he couldn’t see Gibbs behind the cupboard door.

“Yeah, Tony I’m here… Boo!� Gibbs replied, sticking his head back where the kid could see him. Tony giggled and garbled away. Gibbs brought the food back to Tony and began to feed him - he had given up on trying to keep Tony clean at meal times. It just didn’t happen no matter what he tried and today was no different. Tony was refusing to eat and kept trying to take the spoon out of Gibbs’ hand, which resulted in getting oatmeal on Tony’s pajamas, on Gibbs’ shirt, on the floor and none in the little boy’s tummy. Gibbs pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration,

“Tony, leave the spoon alone please,� Tony just looked up at him, then put his hands in the oatmeal on the front of his pajamas, staring at his hands in concentration as the sticky substance clung to his fingers, “Come on Tony, eat your breakfast…� The little boy kept his mouth shut and shook his head.

“Da-D…. Mmmf…� Gibbs seized the opportunity and placed the oatmeal in his little mouth while it was open, Tony held it in his mouth for a while then spat it back out at him.

“Tony NO! That’s naughty; don’t spit out your food.� Gibbs sighed, frustration rising by the minute.

As Gibbs was about to give up he heard his phone ringing. Setting the bowl down he went to the front of the house where he had left the phone and answered it.

“Yeah Gibbs.� He grunted

“Gibbs, it’s Abby. I was just ringing to let you know Kate and Timmy are coming over with me today to watch Tony. We will be there at 12.30 on the dot.� Abby’s voice was enthusiastic as usual, but a little nervous �" she hadn’t completely forgiven herself after ‘the walking incident’ despite everyone telling her she wasn’t to blame. Gibbs had strategically asked Abby to watch Tony today while he went and saw the lawyer, in hopes that it would help to regain some of her confidence, and show her that he didn’t blame her either and he trusted her.

“Ok, Abbs. See you then.� Gibbs snapped the phone shut and returned to the kitchen.

“Clever boy.� He said, on seeing Tony who had reached the bowl of oatmeal and was now trying very hard to feed himself with a combination of using the spoon and his hands. He wasn’t having much success - none of the food was staying on the spoon and most of it was now on the floor and himself. Gibbs couldn’t help but laugh.

“Thank you.� He said, taking the spoon from Tony’s hand and quickly feeding him the last of the food. Once finished he cleaned up and whisked Tony off to clean him up and dress him for the day.

Gibbs and Tony spent the morning together playing. Tony was rather active today; crawling away from Gibbs and making the older man chase him all over the house, pulling things out of the kitchen cupboards while Gibbs was making coffee, playing with his cars and blocks - he also had a new found fascination with the downstairs toilet and kept trying to get in there.

All in all, Tony had been very busy and Gibbs was exhausted. Gibbs was now lying on his stomach on the floor, his head propped up in his arms reading the paper, as Tony crawled all over his back laughing and chatting away, with “Bub-Bub� and “Car� thrown into the jumble of noises Gibbs guessed were Tony’s attempts of a conversation. Gibbs closed his eyes for a second to relieve the strain, and when he opened them Tony’s little face was right in front of his, bright green eyes staring at him, pacifier wedged in his mouth.

“Da-Da.� He said, putting a little hand on Gibbs’ face gently, before moving the hand down to Gibbs’ mouth.

“Roar!� Gibbs said playfully as he pretended to chomp Tony’s hand in his mouth. Tony quickly took his hand away and laughed and laughed, before cautiously moving it back up to Gibb’s mouth again, “Roar!� Gibbs repeated, and nibbled on the boy’s fingers again. Tony squealed with delight and Gibbs grabbed him with one arm, pulling Tony’s little body closer to him, tickling the boy and pretending to nibble off his finger and toes. Tony was in hysterics by the time the game was over, even Gibbs’ stomach hurt from laughing so hard.

Gibbs left Tony on the floor and stood up to get the boy a drink and a snack, watching from the kitchen as Tony made his way over to the window and used it to get into a standing position. Gibbs smiled at the little boy who was thumping on the window saying “Ooooh!� as he watched the rain outside. Leaving the food and bottle of juice on the counter he walked swiftly into the lounge room, moving the coffee table as far away from Tony as possible. It had been a week since Tony’s first step fiasco (not that Gibbs really counted that as his first) and as yet he hadn’t tried again - now is the perfect time for another attempt, Gibbs thought. Crouching down a few feet behind Tony, Gibbs called his name and held his arms out toward the boy.

“Come on Tony…Come to Da-Da…Come on clever boy,� Tony very slowly let go of the window and took a slow, wobbly step towards his Da-Da. Careful not to startle the boy, Gibbs continued to give praise in a soft voice, “Atta boy Tony…. Come on… one more… you can do it!� Tony took another step and another before starting to wobble dangerously. Gibbs caught him before he could hit the floor.

“Who’s a clever boy?� Gibbs’ voice was full of pride as he stood the boy back down on the floor, holding his little hands till Tony caught his balance, “Ok Tony, try again…� Gibbs slowly let go of Tony’s hands…

************************************************************************************************

Tim, Abby and Kate arrived right on time to Gibbs’ house and opened the front door quietly. It was 12.30 and they knew Tony usually had a nap around lunchtime, so were being extra quiet in case the little boy was sleeping. Creeping past the front room and into the main living area they stopped, smiles lighting up all their faces. Tony was walking, very slowly and unsteadily, towards where Gibbs was knelt on the floor. Abby did her best to quell her excitement and stay quiet while the others didn’t make a sound. McGee pulled out his phone and began to record the scene, Tony taking 1, 2, 3, 4 steps before falling into Gibbs waiting arms squealing with delight and yelling “DA, DA, DA!� loudly.

“Are you three just going to stand there all day or are you gonna come sit down?� Gibbs said without even turning around, his voice softer than usual, colored with pride.

“We didn’t want to disturb Tony’s efforts Gibbs.� Kate said with a smile.

Now that Tony was safely in Gibbs arms without risk of falling and hurting himself, Abby couldn’t control her excitement. She rushed over to Gibbs and Tony and threw her arms around them both. Gibbs chuckled and Tony looked surprised and jumped a little.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh…! He walked, he actually did it! I can’t believe it Gibbs, Tony actually walked over to you! It was so much better than last week, last week was, well…. Let’s not go there. Last week doesn’t even count as anything. But this, this was walking! And Timmy caught it on camera, didn’t you Tim?�

“Well yes…� McGee went to reply before Abby cut him off again.

“And… he said Da-Da! When did he start talking? When did he start saying that? OMG Gibbs, this is huge!� Abby took Tony from his arms and lifted him high into the air. McGee and Kate grinned at Abby’s burst of excitement, it was big news. This was the first they had seen or heard of Tony’s new accomplishments, as they hadn’t been over in a week, deciding to give Gibbs and his new son some alone time. The only team member to visit this past week had been Ducky, who had been over at least every second night after work, but he hadn’t mentioned the talking or walking.

After the initial excitement, and Gibbs filling Abby in on each detail as she forcefully requested, Abby had sat Tony on the ground again. After all the spinning and lifting in the air courtesy of the Goth-girl, Tony looked a little dizzy and wobbly. Gibbs patted his boy’s hair softly, addressing his three team members.

“Ok you three, watch him like a hawk. I should be back in a couple of hours, there is a drink and snack for him in the kitchen and he hasn’t had a sleep yet so he will probably sleep for most of the time I’m out. If you need anything, call me.� Gibbs barked out his orders. Despite his team being a great help since Tony had arrived he still wasn’t ready to let them in fully. He also needed to keep them on their toes and slightly afraid of him for the job, where his ex-marine (Second ‘B’ for bastard) side got the results he needed. Gibbs gave Tony a quick hug and said goodbye before grabbing his pack with all the necessary papers in it and left. He yelled over his shoulder at his agents,

“If anything happens to him while I’m gone, you had better run.�

*************************************************************************************************

Abby and Kate had given Tony his snack and his drink before taking the baby upstairs for his obligatory after food clothing change, while McGee, struck with an idea, turned on his laptop and begun to download the video of Tony walking from his phone onto it.

Returning from the changing expedition, Tony looked fresh, clean and warm, dressed in a pair of little black baby Adidas sweat pants and matching gray hooded jumper �" it was the start of October and the weather was starting to cool off now. Tony was snuggling into Abby and giving her cuddles.

“Ok, I can’t believe it, you branded the baby.� McGee said, shaking his head.

“Yeah, so what Timmy?� Abby said, popping Tony on the floor with his toys as Kate gave McGee a glare.

“Well…Ummm…N- Nothing. Don’t worry about it.� Tim stuttered, faltering under the gazes of the two ‘scary’ women before him �" at least Ziva wasn’t here yet - then he would be really worried.

The team played with Tony for about an hour before the little boy crashed out on the floor. Not having the heart to wake him they covered him with a blanket and let him sleep, pushing the pacifier (which had begun to fall out) back into his mouth softly.

“He is a pretty good kid,� McGee said, looking at the sleeping boy on the floor, “Doesn’t seem like much trouble at all.�

“You’re right Timmy, he does seem pretty content. He has already bonded with Gibbs really well, and they have only been together for like, a week….�

“I guess he knows he can trust Gibbs,� Kate said, running her finger through Tony’s baby curls, “And he is probably enjoying getting so much attention, not to mention the fact he is getting to spend more than a few hours with someone, before getting passed along to the next person. Gibbs is probably the first constant person in his life.�

After a few minutes of quiet conversation Kate and Abby decided to go grab the food they would need for dinner.

“McGee, you’ll be ok to watch Tony for a few minutes while Abby and I go get the food?� Kate’s question was more an order.

McGee gulped, and looked down at the sleeping baby, “Uhhh…yeah…Sure…� He stammered. The baby was sleeping - how hard could that be?

“Good, thanks Timmy.� Abby said, kissing him on the cheek before she and Kate took off.

“You think Tony will be alright with Timmy?� Abby whispered to Kate. Kate laughed quietly,

“Tony will be fine, it’s Tim I’d be more worried about…�

McGee had been working quietly on his computer for around 10 minutes. He was enjoying the silence, and although he would never admit it to Kate or Abby, Tony was a cute kid. Engrossed in his computer work McGee didn’t notice Tony had woken until he felt a bump to his legs. Tony had crawled over to McGee, car in hand and lifted it up to him,

“Car.� He said, his childish voice sounded a little sleepy still.

“Yeah, Tony that’s a car…� McGee said as he nervously picked up the little boy and held him on his lap, making car noises for Tony. This isn’t too bad McGee thought, nothing to it. McGee looked down at Tony, and suddenly the little boy turned bright red, and made a grunting noise; little fists balled up and shaking.

“Oh no….� McGee said, his voice a little weary as the smell filled his nostrils �" Ok, I can handle this, it’s just a little diaper change. McGee had younger cousins, he had done this before - well kind of - and it was just a diaper. Don’t stuff this up Tim, the boss will kill you if anything happens to his kid �" Pushing that thought aside he cautiously picked Tony up and took the baby upstairs. Grabbing a clean diaper, baby wipes and baby powder he set to work, lying Tony down on the floor.

“Good boy, Tony. Just hold still, we will have you fixed up in no time,� Taking the diaper off and cleaning the boy, McGee reached for a baby wipe “You’re being a good boy to…� McGee stopped dead in his tracks as he felt something warm spreading over his shirt. He looked back to the baby, who was smiling; his eyes shining brightly, and then looked at his shirt, “Oh you can’t be serious…� McGee said, frustrated. Tony had peed on him, and it wasn’t a little patch either,

“You were waiting to do that to me, weren’t you?� McGee asked, irritation in his voice, as he finished changing and dressing the boy. Tony looked at him innocently, but McGee swore he was smirking. Taking Tony downstairs and placing him amongst his toys, McGee raced quickly to grab a clean shirt out of his car in the drive, came back in and got changed in the front room. Pulling the shirt and jumper over his head, he heard the front door open,

“Uhh…. Hi Boss.� McGee said quickly.

“McGee…Where’s Tony?�

“He’s out in the lounge room playing; I just had to quickly change my shirt…� He didn’t get to finish his sentence as Gibbs strode into the room.

“MCGEE…� Gibbs growled, “WHERE THE HELL DID HE GO!?�

Gibbs was searching for the boy, all the doors to the other rooms were closed and the baby gate was at the staircase, so he had to be there.

Tim jumped at the tone of Gibbs’ voice - he sounded pissed. He only left Tony for a few minutes’ tops, and the kid had gone. How can a kid get lost in a room?

“Don’t just stand there, McGee - help me find him!� Gibbs’ voice was dark and threatening; he was doing a good job at hiding the panic he felt. Tony wasn’t in the room; under the couch, in the hall or in a cupboard.

Where the hell… Gibbs thought, panic rising - and then he remembered Tony’s fascination with the toilet today. Sure the door was closed now, but…

Opening the door he shook his head, relief flooding his body. There was Tony, standing up and holding on to the rim of the toilet, a mountain of unrolled toilet paper covering the floor �" there were 4 full rolls this morning and now only the cardboard centers were left, the rest of the paper was covering the floor and hanging off Tony.

Tony looked up at Gibbs guiltily, and Gibbs saw what was in his little hand, hovering over the bowl, waiting to release into the water below…. McGee’s phone.

“Tony, no...� Gibbs said, warning in his voice but not loud enough to startle the boy, “Give the phone to Daddy… there’s a good boy…� Gibbs said, extending his hand towards his son “Taa…�

“Come on Tony, please - give the phone to your Dad!� McGee’s voice was pleading with frustration, making Gibbs glare at him.

Tony looked at Gibbs, then at McGee and smiled cheekily…SPLOSH… In went the phone.

“NO!� The two men yelled, and both dashed forward. Shocked, Tony let go of the toilet and fell to his bottom with a THUD. Looking up to Gibbs with big teary eyes he began to cry, sobbing,

“Da-Da…� Gibbs scooped up the little boy and cuddled him, rubbing his back, “This, McGee, is what happens when you leave a child unattended!� Gibbs was more frustrated than angry, and McGee had learnt his lesson.

Gibbs left McGee to fish out his phone while he consoled Tony.

*************************************************************************************************

“Hello Anthony, my dear, dear boy,� Dr Mallard said upon entering Gibbs’ house and seeing the little boy crawling toward him at pace - apart from Gibbs, Ducky was the one Tony was next most familiar with. Ducky picked him up and cuddled him; Tony snuggled into his neck, “Have you been a good boy today, not causing your father any troubles?� Ducky asked, walking into the main living area, and spying the rest of the team already there, sitting in the lounge room.

“No, no trouble for me Duck…. But why don’t you ask McGee over there?� Gibbs said, pointing to McGee who was sitting at the kitchen table looking sullen. On seeing Gibbs, Tony stretched his arms out for the man to hold him, saying,

“Da-Da!� Gibbs took hold of Tony and held him gently.

“My Timothy, what happened to you?� Ducky enquired.

“Perhaps we should eat first, yes? Then McGee can tell you of his adventure.� Ziva said, her eyes twinkling as she motioned everyone to the table. Once again Gibbs’ house had become full, and Gibbs hazarded a guess it was all due to the bundle in his arms, who was putting his slobbery mouth on Gibbs’ cheek.

“Ohh, look Gibbs - he’s giving you kisses.� Cooed Kate

“Abbs, did you teach him that?� Gibbs asked, keeping his tone in mock annoyance even though he thought he might cry �" he was so proud of the little boy.

“Yep, well, someone had to teach him to be a gentleman.� She stated and they all laughed, even Tony - who just joined in because everyone else was, which only made them laugh harder.

Dinner was, once again, excellent; Ziva really was a good cook. And Tim had kept them all entertained with his story of the day, after cleaning up and bathing Tony ready for bed, everyone congregated to the couches for coffee. Tony took two steps from where he was holding Gibbs’ legs and crashed into McGee’s knees.

McGee looked down at him and sighed, “What now?� He said, trying not to sound annoyed, “I swear this kid has been sent to torture me. What with the eye poking, peeing on me, crawling off and putting my phone in the toilet…� McGee whined while the others laughed.

Tony looked up at McGee with big eyes and held his arms up to him, car in one of his hands. McGee sighed and lifted Tony so that he was now in a standing position in his lap.

“Hey Tony,� Abby said, making Tony turn to look at her, “Give McGee a kiss!� she said while making kissy noises at the little boy.

With car in hand Tony put his mouth against McGee’s cheek and slobbered. McGee’s heart softened; he couldn’t stay mad at Tony, the kid was too damn cute.

“See McGee, he does like you.� Ziva said. Gibbs watched on proudly as his little boy brought his team together.

McGee smiled slightly and Kate and Abby cooed. McGee went to take another sip of his coffee. SPLOSH. Tony’s car landed right in the cup.

“Tony, No!�

Tony had found Abby’s singing reindeer, and was now making a racket.

‘Jingle Bells’played over and over again, before Tony decided he didn’t want to hear the whole song play and just kept pressing the button repeatedly, laughing loudly, ‘Jingle Bells, Jin…Jing….Jingle Be….Jingl….Jingle Bells’.After about 5 minutes of hearing the ‘Jingle Bells’ rap, Gibbs had had enough and took the batteries out.

Tony, not appreciating his dad’s lack of support in his new musical career, gave him a dirty look before crawling quickly away, pacifier wedged in his mouth, over to his toy box.

“Oh thank goodness,� Kate said from the kitchen, where she and Ziva were busy cooking for the evening’s feast, “If I had to listen to ‘Jingle bells’ one more time…�

“Daa-Dee!� Tony called loudly, his voice sounding a little panicky, “Daa-Dee…�

“Tony…� Gibbs called back; as he returned to the lounge room. On seeing Tony he started to laugh, “Kate, Ziva look at this.� He said, gasping out between bursts of laughter. They turned around from their spot in the kitchen and burst out laughing as well. Tony had fallen head first into his toy box and was now stuck, little legs kicking in the air.

“Daa-Dee!� The little boy’s voice was now sounding shaky, like he was about to cry.

“Ok Tony, sorry…. Come here.� Gibbs said, lifting his little boy out from the clutches of the toy box and giving him a cuddle, tears clinging to the little boy’s eyelashes as he started to mumble, ‘Bub-bub.’

�Hey, it’s ok. No need to cry bubba,� He said, wiping the little eyes dry with the sleeve of his shirt, “I know - how about we decorate the tree, huh? Won’t that be fun?� He said, trying to distract Tony before he had a full melt down. Tony had been teething the last few days and because of this his moods were a little, well, fragile.

Gibbs walked over to where the tree was located and opened the bag full of decorations, gold and silver tinsel and baubles shined from inside. Tony caught site of the shining objects and wriggled to get down. Gibbs placed him standing on the ground and watched as he peered into the bag of newly bought decorations. It was now 3 days till Christmas and it was the first time in years that Gibbs had actually celebrated the event. For the first time since Shannon and Kelly’s death he wasn’t working over the Christmas break, for the first time he wasn’t confining himself to the office in order to escape the memories.

“Ba!� Tony said with excitement as he took out a shining bauble and threw it as far as he could - lucky they’re plastic Gibbs thought.

�Ba.� he said again, holding out another shiny bauble towards his Dad.

“No Tony, that’s not a ball,� Gibbs said picking up the boy, taking another bauble out of the bag, “It goes on the tree, see, like this.� He said, placing the bauble neatly on the tree.

Tony looked at the bauble in his hand, confusion clouding his face. Gibbs had to chuckle; Tony looked like he was really trying to process what had just been done.

Tony’s eyes lit up, “Ba!� He said again as he threw the bauble at the tree. Tony clapped his hands and laughed as the bauble got stuck between the branches.

“I guess that’s one way to do it.� Gibbs had an amused tone to his voice, putting Tony back onto the floor.

Kate and Ziva, who had till this point remained quiet, laughed from the kitchen and continued to cook.

It had been decided that since everyone was going to be away for Christmas day with their respected families that they would have an early team Christmas and as usual Gibbs’ house had been nominated. Gibbs himself didn’t mind, it made things easier with Tony to have everyone here anyway.

“Oooh!� Tony said, as he grabbed some tinsel out of the bag and tried to eat it.

“Tony,� Gibbs sighed, “It’s not food.� Taking the full length out of the bag and placing it over Tony’s shoulders. The little boy turned around slowly, trying to grab the other end behind his back, before he toddled off into the kitchen to show Kate and Ziva what he had found.

Tony eventually came back to the tree where his dad was busy decorating it, tinsel in one hand trailing behind him, cookie in the other.

“Who’s getting spoiled huh?� Gibbs asked Tony, who just looked up at him smiling and offered his slobbered on cookie to his dad, “No thanks Tony, you eat it.� And he did, getting crumbs and slobber over his shirt and the floor.

Eventually, the tree was close to finished, no thanks to Tony who decided his way of putting the baubles on the tree was better and continued to throw them, resulting in Gibbs having to pick them up off the floor before placing them carefully on the tree. There were only three special items left. Gibbs picked Tony up carefully, cuddling him gently before he spoke quietly to the boy.

“These Tony,� He said, opening a box on the coffee table with care, “Are very special. They belonged to your Aunty Shannon and Kelly.� Reaching inside the box Gibbs pulled out two delicate Christmas baubles. They had beautiful hand painted pictures on them, one with a reindeer and sleigh flying through the night sky with the name Shannon painted in gold, the other a picture of an angel surrounded by twinkling stars and the name Kelly.

Tony looked up at his dad before reaching out and gently touching the bauble with his little hands. It’s almost as though he knows how special these are, Gibbs thought to himself, before placing them gently towards the top of the tree - just in case Tony explores., Gibbs reached down to get the final item.

-----------------------FLASHBACK--------------------------

Every year as a tradition, the Gibbs family decorated their Christmas tree together. And every year they saved one special item till last, a beautiful glass star which had been handed down through Shannon’s family for years. Every year since Kelly was born they stood together at the base of the tree, and with Kelly in their arms placed the star on top and gave thanks for what they had. That was until Kelly accidently broke it. This year they would have to find something new.

“Honey, Jethro, I found it!� Shannon exclaimed, as she put the shopping bags on the table.

“Found what Shan?�

“Yeah mum, found what? Is it for me?!� Kelly asked, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the bag.

“Not exactly Kells,� The little girl’s face fell, “It’s for all of us.� As Shannon spoke she carefully lifted out a beautiful angel for the top of their tree. The angle had a childish porcelain face, and long brown hair. Her flowing dress was a sparkling white pearl shimmer, with flecks of silver and gold. Her wings were as delicate as silk.

“Wow mummy she’s beautiful!� Kelly gasped eyes wide, “She looks like me!�

Both Shannon and Jethro laughed.

“Yes Kells, she’s just like you. That’s why I chose her.� Shannon smiled down at her daughter, who was trying to climb up Jethro to get a better look. Indeed the chosen angel did look remarkably like Kelly.

Walking over to the base of the tree, Jethro spoke, �Hey Kells, since you’re a big girl now, would you like to put the angel on the tree?�

“Oh, yes please Daddy!� Kelly said, her excited voice getting louder, “You’re right I am a big girl now - I’m 5, I can do it!�

Kelly’s little face was beaming as she took the angel in her hands and Jethro lifted her so she could reach the top of the tree. Using all the care she possessed, Kelly positioned the angel on top. Jethro held Kelly on his hip and put his other arm around Shannon. They all stood and looked at the tree.

“Perfect.� Kelly giggled, and Shannon put a kiss on top of her daughter’s head. And together they gave thanks for what they had…each other.

--------------------END FLASHBACK----------------------

With Tony in his arms, Gibbs reached in and removed the angel from the box. She still, even after all these years, looked as beautiful as ever. Just like Kelly. Standing at the base of the tree, Tony in one arm, Gibbs put the angel on the top. Giving Tony a kiss on top of his head, Gibbs gave thanks for what he had and what he found… Tony and Family.

After a moment of quiet contemplation, Gibbs got back on task.

************************************************************************************************

“Hey Tony,� Gibbs said to the little boy still in his arms, “Let’s go help Aunty Ziva make cookies.� Taking Tony into the kitchen where Kate was putting the Turkey into the oven and Ziva was mixing the cookie batter, he handed Tony to Ziva, who put him on the bench next to the bowl.

“I’m just going to cut up some more firewood so we don’t run out.� Gibbs said, his normally gruff voice remarkably soft.

“Of course Gibbs, we shall watch him. We will make and eat lots of cookies won’t we little cookie-muncher? Just like that blue thing on that street show you watch.� Ziva tickled the baby on the bench and he giggled childishly.

“It’s Cookie Monster,� Gibbs chuckled, shaking his head, “And the show is Sesame Street.�

“Oh,� Ziva said, “Either way we will eat all the cookies, wont we Tony?�

Gibbs laughed again, “Kate you had better be the responsible one I think.� He smiled, ruffled Tony’s hair, and headed outside.

To say Tony was helpful would have been a lie. Tony was anything but helpful, and Ziva was ready to pull her hair out.

“Tony, NO!� Ziva said, removing Tony’s little hand from the cookie batter. Every time she went to start mixing, Tony would stick his hand in the bowl, grab a fist full of batter, and shove it in his mouth, “If you eat all the batter, there will be no cookies.� Tony just smiled at her, mouth full and drooling. Ziva rolled her eyes.

“Kate, can you help me with him, please?�

“Sorry Ziva, I have to finish cutting the vegetables. And I’m pretty sure he would be safer with cookie dough than with a knife.� Kate laughed.

Ziva just sighed and again removed Tony’s hand from the batter.

“Why don’t you give him a spoon, then he can think he is helping.� Kate’s suggestion sounded like it might even work, so Ziva did just that.

BANG, BANG, BANG. Tony was bashing his spoon on the baking tray as Ziva positioned the cookies. She had made reindeer shaped cookies from a cookie cutter she had found in one of Gibbs’ kitchen draws and they looked wonderful… up until Tony started beating them with his spoon. There were a few casualties, Oh well they can be Tony’s ones she thought. Tony was waving his spoon around, yelling a mixture of gibberish and words ‘Car’, ‘Daa-Dee’, ‘Up’ and ‘Yum’ being the discernable words along with a few ‘Uhh-Ohh’s’ as his spoon whacked the cupboard.

“Oww!� Kate exclaimed as Tony’s spoon connected with her hand as she was putting the vegetable scraps in the bin under the bench.

“Uhh-Ohh!� Tony said, laughing eyes shining brightly at Kate.

“Maybe giving him a weapon wasn’t such a great idea.� Kate said,

Ziva replied smiling, “At least he isn’t eating all the batter anymore, yes?�

Ziva took the spoon out of Tony’s hands and carried him to his highchair, handing him one of the biscuits from the batch she had already made. The others she sat on a plate on the kitchen table well out of Tony’s reach and went back to the kitchen to clean up the mess largely contributed to by Tony.

“I’m just going in to the study to wrap my gifts.� Kate called to Ziva, who was busy crouching down on the floor, cleaning up mess. Ziva was so preoccupied with cleaning the kitchen; that she missed the mischievous look on Tony’s face and the way his little eyes flashed.

************************************************************************************************

Gibbs had spied Abby and McGee as they arrived and commandeered them into helping him carry the firewood inside.

Kicking off their snow covered boots and stepping through the sliding doors into the lounge room, Abby and McGee gasped.

“Uh, Boss,� McGee said trying to stifle a laugh, “You might want to look at this.�

Gibbs stepped through the door, and laughed. Ziva’s head popped up from behind the kitchen cupboards at the sound of the laughter. She started laughing too as she saw Tony.

Tony was sitting in the middle of the kitchen table looking very guiltily at his daddy, his mouth stuffed full of cookies. Gibbs placed his load of firewood down in the box and made his way over to where his son sat.

“Uhh-Ohhâ€� Tony mumbled mouth full of cookie â€" ‘Uhh-Ohh’ was right. It appeared Tony had climbed from his highchair and crawled onto the table over to the cookies, and bitten the heads off about half the reindeer.

“At least now we know he has a new trick - Houdini from the highchair.� Abby said between laughter.

Gibbs picked up his boy, who had finally finished his mouthful of cookie,

“Tony! You silly boy.� Gibbs laughed, he couldn’t get angry with his little man - this was just too precious. At 16 months old Tony was continually surprising him, and this was no different. Gibbs (followed by Abby) took Tony upstairs to change his diaper and clothes. Abby had insisted on dressing Tony in a long sleeved T-shirt she had brought him, it was white and had the words ‘Baby’s First Christmas� written on the front in red and green writing. Technically it would be Tony’s second Christmas, but it was the first he would really get some enjoyment out of, the first with his new daddy and family.

When Gibbs, Abby and Tony arrived back down stairs, they were met with laughter as Ziva relayed to Kate and Ducky (who had just arrived) why they had reindeer cookies without heads.

“My, my Jethro. I hope young Anthony doesn’t get a stomachache from all those cookies…. Ooof!� The elderly M.E grunted as Tony ran smack straight into his legs, wrapping his little arms around his leg giving him a hug. Ducky picked up the boy, who snuggled into his arms. Ducky’s eyes lit up in the presence of the boy - it was no secret Ducky was fond of little Tony, a fact that was growing increasingly more obvious as the months went by.

“Ok,� Abby called out, “Now that everyone is here, I propose, it’s present time!� She beamed like a 6 year old, bouncing on her toes.

“Seems like a good idea to me,� said Kate, “Dinner will be an hour and a half away, so it should fit in perfectly.�

“Alright,� Gibbs conceded, “Presents in 5 minutes. Do what you got to do, get comfy and we’ll start.� He said as he moved around the house, closing up all the curtains to keep the warmth in. It had begun to snow quite heavily outside and the temperature was dropping rapidly.

Finally everyone was settled; there were more presents under the tree than expected. Abby had decided that this year everyone was to draw a name out of the hat and the name you drew was the person you were giving to. That idea seemed pretty logical except, Gibbs noted with amusement, that according to the nametags on the presents, not only did everyone get one person but they also all got Tony. The kid sure was spoiled.

Tony made his way into his Daddy’s arms and was playing contentedly with Gibbs fingers as the gift giving went on, deciding that while Tony was settled they would exchange all the adults’ gifts first. Gifts were given and accepted with heartfelt gratefulness. Tony was entertained with all the brightly colored paper, squealing with excitement as another piece got stuck to him.

When Tony began to whine, they distracted him with his gifts, although he seemed more entranced by the paper. With the exception of the shiny new cars Kate had given him,

“Car!� Tony said over and over again until Gibbs started driving them up and down Tony’s legs and arms making him giggle, before he toddled off to show Abby his shiny toy. Then there were only two gifts left.

“Ok, I’ll go next,� McGee spoke with confidence, none of the usual stumbling in his voice. He grabbed a small relatively flat square present from the tree. “Happy Christmas Boss.� He said, handing the gift over.

Gibbs took the gift with a smile, and started to unwrap it. Tony toddled over to him and sat back in his lap to ‘help’. Everyone looked on in anticipation as he unwrapped the present. It was a CD of some sort; the only clue as to what was on it was the word ‘Tony’.

“Well Timmy, what’s on the disk?� Abby asked curiously.

“It’s a DVD, of photos and videos of Tony - I’ve taken a lot over the last few months and thought maybe Gibbs would want them as keepsakes; I even have his first steps and those photos with Santa we took last week.�

Gibbs stood up putting Tony on the floor and walked over to McGee, giving him a warm genuine smile. Gibbs put his hand on McGee’s shoulder. “Thank you Tim. Thank you very much.� McGee smiled with pride, the use of his first name was an uncommon event.

“So, that leaves one more present. And it must be for Ducky,â€� Kate said, smiling as she read the card, “Dear Grandpa, Happy Christmas, Love from Tony and Jethro.â€� Gibbs handed the gift over to the elderly M.E sitting in the armchair closest to the fire and took Tony back onto his lap. Ducky’s eyes sparkled with unshed tears as he saw the gift. It was an enlarged black and white photo of himself with little Tony in his arms both sound asleep looking peaceful and content. The beautiful silver frame was engraved with the words, ‘Grandpa â€" Christmas 2005’. For the first time in the many years since Gibbs had known the M.E, he was silent, a single tear running down his cheek.

“That’s not all, I have one surprise left,� Gibbs stated. Holding his little boy in his arms he spoke softly, “Tony,� The little boy looked up smiling. Gibbs pointed over to Ducky, “Tony, who’s that?�

Tony looked over to whom his dad was pointing at. “Pa.�

Ducky was crying now, tears falling freely down his cheeks. Gibbs looked around; everyone it seemed had tears in their eyes. Tony stood and toddled over to where Ducky was sitting, lifting his arms up to the older man

“Pa.� He said again. Ducky took the boy into his arms cuddling him gently and whispered through his tears, looking over to where Gibbs was sitting “Thank you. Thank you so very, very much.�

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The remainder of the evening went by pleasantly, the food was once again fantastic and everyone was stuffed by the time they had finished. Tony, although he hadn’t eaten much due to the cookie incident, had still managed to cover himself in his food - apple sauce matted his curls together, and he had also managed to get applesauce on Gibbs’ shirt.

“Timmy and I will clean up, since Kate and Ziva cooked.� Abby offered.

“Jethro, I’ll bathe young Anthony while you go change.� Ducky spoke, and lifted Tony out of his highchair, taking him upstairs

Tony’s squeals could be heard along with shouts of “Daa-Dee!� and “Pa!�

“Jethro, may I ask for you assistance for a moment?� Ducky called from upstairs. Taking the stairs two at a time in case there was a problem, Gibbs dashed upstairs where he found a flustered Ducky, trying to catch Tony, who was toddling naked from room to room.

“I’m sorry Jethro, but the arthritis in my knees is playing up with all this cold weather, and I can’t seem to catch him.�

“Not a problem Duck.� Gibbs said, as he hid behind the doorframe of the room.

“Roar!� Gibbs yelled as he grabbed Tony, as the naked boy crawled past the door, deciding that crawling was still faster than walking. Tony squealed loudly as Gibbs tickled him.

After finally managing to wrestle Tony into his pajamas, they went back downstairs. It was still relatively early when everyone went home - they all had busy days and flights to catch tomorrow.

Tony, after his busy day and no nap, had crashed out on the floor underneath the Christmas tree, buried in his blanket, leaving Gibbs to his own thoughts.

Visions of Shannon and Kelly flashed through his mind, visions of his family then and now flowing through his thoughts. Memories new and old cascading like waterfalls, names and faces - Shannon, Kelly, Ducky, Abby, Kate, Ziva, Tim and Tony… Ah Tony, the little boy who had, in such a short time given him back so much, mending his wounds and fixing his heart.

He watched the little boy sleep under the tree, peaceful breathing echoing in the quiet calm of the room, his little face being illuminated by the glow of the fire. The boy was slowly giving Gibbs back his heart and his family.

Gibbs suddenly knew what he needed to do. Picking up the phone, he dialed a number he should have dialed a long time ago.

“Hello?� Came the voice on the other end.

“Hello…. Dad.�
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Pretty please leave a comment and let me know what you think???

AN: dedicated to -

William James Young

11/23/2009

"Forever in our hearts Poppy"

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Gibbs crouched down and pulled the beanie onto Tony’s head. Standing back up, he looked over the little boy; his eyes smiling. A total opposite to Tony who looked up at his Daddy, clearly not impressed with the latest development. Gibbs laughed at the look he got. Ok, well maybe I got a little carried away. Tony’s not impressed but at least he will be warm - Gibbs thought, looking again to Tony who had pulled the black beanie off his head and thrown it on the floor, his blonde curls sticking up with the static created.

Tony was standing stiffly, unable to move with the layers of clothing Gibbs had placed upon the small body, and to top it all off Gibbs had also managed to get him into a snow suit, a red, overly padded, one piece snow suit. Nope - Tony was definitely not happy - but with the weather being so cold outside Gibbs wasn’t taking any chances; he had slotted into the role of protective father quite well.

This was to be Tony’s first experience with snow, he’d seen it from the window, and when he was transported from house to car to wherever they were going next, as yet he was still to play in it. But today was the day; Gibbs had to clear the driveway and the path to the house and couldn’t leave Tony inside on his own. The heavy snowfalls over the last few days had covered the area and with Jackson Gibbs arriving in 2 hours he needed to make sure the man could park his car somewhere and make it to the house without falling.

Gibbs felt the tension returning to his body at the thought of his dad’s arrival. It had started two nights ago with a phone call and after spending close to 4 hours talking, trying to resolve some of the issues between them and telling him about Isabella and the boy who was now his son, the phone call had ended with Gibbs inviting his father for Christmas. So here he was, tense at the arrival because he had no idea what to expect - 9 years is a long time.

Gibbs sighed and put the beanie back onto Tony’s little head, “Come on Tony, up we go,� Gibbs said scooping the little boy into his arms, “It’s snow time!�

Coaxing the pacifier into Tony’s mouth and placing the snow boots onto little feet, Gibbs opened the front door and stepped onto the porch, chuckling as Tony’s little eyes bulged out of his head as the cold hit him. Grabbing the shovel in one hand with Tony in the other arm he made his way to the driveway, standing Tony on the ground next to him, he started to shovel quickly. Tony looked thoroughly confused at the white cold stuff falling onto his face â€" his eyes wide with wonderment and wrinkling his nose as a small flake landed on it, his little mittened hands swiping away the offending flakes as they fell softly onto him.

As Gibbs started to move further down the driveway he noticed Tony following him, looking bewildered and taking uncertain steps on the uneven snowy surface, his little boots making a crunching sound as he walked. It was as Gibbs had finished the driveway and was moving onto the sidewalk that Tony fell. Gibbs saw it in slow motion, Tony falling face first into a soft mound of snow. Gibbs let out a chuckle before sobering at Tony’s cries for his “Daa-Dee�, Gibbs knew he was just crying more out of shock than anything else but it still made his heart clench,

“It’s okay buddy, you’re alright, it’s just a little bit of snow.� Gibbs picked up the little boy, brushing the snow off his face and cuddling him soothingly whilst popping the pacifier back into the little mouth, “Hey, no more tears, daddy’s here� Gibbs soothed softly and wiped the baby tears from his boys eyes. Once Tony’s sobs abated Gibbs tried to put him down, but Tony point blank refused to be put down on the evil white stuff, tears once again spilling over the soft lashes, his bottom lip quivering.

“Okay, Tony hold on a second.� Gibbs was struck with an idea. Tony nestled in one arm as Gibbs opened the garage, moving towards the back, he pulled out from behind an old cabinet a pink plastic sled. The sled had been Kelly’s, she loved it, they had spent many afternoons together taking the sled up the hill at the end of the street - Kelly squealing with delight as they flew down to the bottom. Oh the trouble Kelly would get into with that sled; Gibbs remembered fondly the day she took out a mailbox and was lucky she didn’t hurt herself. It was ironic really, that the sled that got his angelic little girl in trouble was now going to keep his cheeky boy out of it. Gibbs sat Tony in the sled, before dragging it behind him and finishing off the work he had to do.

Tony was enjoying his sled ride, chirping and giggling away and he was getting braver with the snow too, picking it up gently in his mittened hands, and, true to form, eating it, making a face at the coldness. Gibbs smiled as Tony got cranky at the snow for being so cold in his mouth, babbling at it in a grumpy tone and waving his hands around. And he laughed out loud when Tony threw a handful of snow at him.

Gibbs gave a playful growl then threw some snow softly back at Tony, who giggled delightedly, his eyes shining brightly; all fear of the snow now gone.

The sight that greeted Jackson (Jack) Gibbs on arrival to his son’s house was a delightful one, and it brought back memories of his granddaughter and the life he once had, one that he missed with all his heart. His son â€" Leroy â€" was crouched down in the snow carefully throwing tiny snowballs at the pint sized child standing in front of him; the little boy was laughing and trying to stay upright as another snowball hit him with a soft thud. Jackson chuckled to himself; at some point the little boy had lost a mitten, and had a look of disgust, shock and confusion on his face as he touched the snow with a bare hand. The kid seemed like a happy little fellow, and peels of the boy’s giggles could be heard breaking the silence of the day.

And Leroy, his boy, looked contented and happy, truly happy almost as though his world had finally righted itself after so many years of pain. This was a stark difference to the man he had last seen at Shannon and Kelly’s funeral, that enraged, inconsolable, devastated, guilt ridden man, a man whose entire world had crashed down around him in a blink of an eye, a man who had contemplated eating his gun on more than one occasion when the darkness overcame him.

Yes, Jackson knew all about Leroy and what he became after his family’s tragic fate. Unbeknown to his son, Jackson had kept in contact with Isabella â€" right up until her marriage - and had been told all about the darkness and despair his son had found, even though Leroy had wanted nothing to do with him after the funeral Jackson had managed to keep tabs on his boy. Jackson had been crushed when he found out the happy family man had turned into a gruff shell of himself, and how he had closed off his heart to the world. Now looking at his son with Isabella’s boy - no, now he was Leroy’s boy - it seemed as though his son had opened his heart and managed to reclaim some of what he lost all those years ago. Jackson hoped that starting now he too would be able to regain what his heart was missing. His son. A grandchild.

---------------FLASHBACK---------------

“Grandpa, Grandpa!� Kelly squealed, as Jackson got out of the car. The little girl raced across the snow covered ground and threw herself full force at the man, her arms squeezing him tightly, “I missed you so much Grandpa.�

Kelly’s cheeks were slightly flushed with the cool air and she was smiling so brightly that the mere sight of it would warm the coldest heart.

“Kelly is that you? I could barely recognize you; you’ve grown so much since I saw you last.�

Kelly laughed, “You’re silly Grandpa, you saw me two weeks ago for my school concert, remember?�

“So I did,� Jackson chuckled, “And you were the loveliest, piano playing Christmas tree I have ever seen.�

“I really was, wasn’t I?�

At 7 years old Kelly wasn’t really a modest child. She was beautiful, funny, and smart and she knew it too.

“Come on Grandpa, I have so many things to show you - Daddy and I made a snowman! Maddie and I made a new run for the sled! And Mommy made cookies, Aunty Bella burnt them so they’re not very good, but you have to pretend to like them so Bella won’t feel too bad!�

Jackson laughed as Kelly grabbed his hand, dragging him towards her first show and tell item, a contented smile on his face. He was finally home again.

---------------END FLASHBACK---------------

Gibbs let out a sigh as his dad stepped out of the car. It was now or never. Picking Tony up from the ground he made his way over to his dad,

“Dad.�

“Leroy.�

Both men paused, slightly uncomfortable and unsure of what to say. Despite the fact they had cleared the air, and agreed to start a fresh in their phone conversation, this first meeting was always going to be difficult.

“Car!� Tony piped up, breaking the silence, excitedly pointing to Jacks red car in the driveway.

“Atta boy Tony, yeah that’s a car,� Gibbs patted the boy on the head before directing his words towards his dad, “Well he is impressed, red cars are his favorite. Dad, meet Tony.�

Jackson took a good look at the boy, his grandson; he really was a cute, good looking kid, which was to be expected considering how lovely Isabella had been.

“My god Leroy, he looks like Isabella. I would recognize those eyes anywhere.�

Jackson reached out to take Tony from Gibbs arms; Tony grabbed onto his daddy’s shirt tightly and buried his head in Gibbs’ neck. Gibbs saw a flash of hurt in the older man’s eyes.

“Don’t worry dad,� He spoke reassuringly, “It will take him a little while to warm up. He’s been teething lately and has been a little clingy, plus he hasn’t had a sleep today so is probably tired.�

Jackson gave a small smile, “It’s alright Leroy, the boy is probably like all babies his age, a little weary of strangers.�

Those words caused mixed emotions in Gibbs - he was happy that Tony now had a constant figure in his life so the boy could tell the difference between ‘strangers’ and those who would look after him - but also filled him with sadness and regret as ‘strangers’ is what his father and he had become over the years. Not wanting to get into a discussion on the topic in the front yard, Gibbs just shrugged his shoulder and rubbed Tony soothingly on the back.

“We should really get inside, Tony and I have been out here for a while now and it’s getting colder, I don’t want him to get a chill. Do you need a hand with your bags?�

“No thanks son, I’ve got them.â€� Jackson grabbed the suitcase from the car and followed his son inside. Noticing how very few changes to the house had been made since he was last here; the ex-wives Isabella had told him about obviously hadn’t made much of an impression to the home. The only real difference was the large T.V in the lounge room, everything else was pretty much still the same. Same couch, same tables, same kitchen and same rugs, even the presence of toys was the same only this time instead of being neatly stacked â€" as Shannon always did â€" they were scattered on the floor, and instead of the dolls and tea sets there were cars and blocks. Everything was the same and yet so completely different.

*************************************************************************************************

After changing Tony and getting Jack settled into the guest room, they all returned to the lounge room. Gibbs sat Tony on the floor amongst his toys and Tony immediately started bashing blocks together and throwing them even further around the room, squealing in delight as he shoved the end of the large wooded block in his mouth, before taking it out and returning to the previous bash and throw game.

Jack laughed as he caught one of Tony’s blocks before it hit the window “I bet he’s a handful.�

“He has his moments, but he’s a good boy; usually pretty happy and content really.�

“How’s his temper? Kelly had a shocking temper at this age, I remember.�

Gibbs’ heart constricted painfully at the mention of Kelly. Even with all the stuff happening with Isabella and Tony, Gibbs had still managed to keep the mentioning of Kelly and Shannon to a minimum. Sure he thought about them a lot, especially when watching Tony, but as for talking about them with someone - well… it was hard, and wasn’t something he wanted to do right now.

Gibbs answered, trying to keep the tone of his voice light, and changing the subject quickly, “He hasn’t really thrown a tantrum yet, but he does have a good set of lungs on him - so when he does it will be a good one. I really should check on dinner - I started the roast a few hours ago so it should almost be done. You want a beer?� Gibbs threw the question over his shoulder as he walked towards the kitchen. Tony toddled behind his daddy, dragging a piece of tinsel he had just ripped off the tree behind him.

Jackson sensed the turn of conversation was intentional, and that his son didn’t want to go bringing up any painful memories so let it go.

“Yeah a beer would be good Leroy thanks.� The beer might help to remove the tension in the room, “It seems you have a little shadow following you,� Jackson chuckled as he watched Tony following his dad around, sticking so close to the man it was a wonder he didn’t trip over the boy, “Does he rip things of the tree often?�

Gibbs laughed as he answered, a sparkle lit up the blue eyes. “The tree has been up for three days and he’s destroyed the parts he can reach twice already, I had to move all the baubles out of his reach - he thinks they’re balls and keeps throwing them.� Gibbs walked back into the lounge room with Tony following and handed the beer over before walking back to the kitchen. Tony lingered near Jackson for a moment before giving a smile and handing over the tinsel babbling something Jackson couldn’t make out, then he took off after his dad again.

After a few minutes of Gibbs being in the kitchen the banging started up. Tony was banging loudly on a plastic container yelling, “Da, Da, Da!� at the top of his voice. Gibbs, who was used to the noise, ignored it. Jackson couldn’t.

“What’s going on here little fella?� Jackson questioned the boy, who was sitting on the floor near his dad’s feet, banging happily away. Tony paused, looking up at Jackson who had crouched down in front of him; Tony gave the man a cheeky smile, before bashing the container again with newfound enthusiasm. “Is he always this noisy Leroy?�

Gibbs smiled and picked Tony up off the floor and took him back over to his toy pile - Tony started pressing buttons on his toy car, making noise once again.

“Trust me dad, it’s when he’s quiet that you need to worry.�

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Gibbs and Jackson had been talking in the kitchen for around 15 minutes when Gibbs noticed something, well a lack of something anyway.

“Dad do you hear anything?�

“No…�

“Exactly,� Gibbs cut him off, quickly going into the lounge room, “Toooonny!� Gibbs called out, “Where are you?� in as close to a singsong voice as a gruff ex-marine could. No noise could be heard.

“Where’d the little fella go?� Jackson said, as he looked around the room.

“Not sure, but I can tell you where he was,“ Gibbs pointing towards the Christmas tree, the gifts had been unceremoniously strewn about and the wrapping paper had been poked and ripped by little fingers. With a sigh Gibbs noticed the sticky handprints on the floor and the half eaten slobbery candy cane poking out from under the couch, “Looks like he got his hands on the candy canes too.� Although I have no idea how he could of reached them Gibbs thought with amusement.

“Well son, your right, looks like tornado Tony had swept through here.� Jackson was surprised that his son seemed so calm - not only about the sticky mess on the floor, but also about the disappearing of the child in question.

Gibbs guessed what his father was thinking and shrugged, “He’s a cheeky boy; this happens a lot, I guess I’m getting used to it.�

Both men looked as the sticky trail stopped next to the couch. Peering behind it they spied Tony sleeping wedged between the couch and the wall, sticky drool covering his face and hands. Jackson smiled happily and picked up the boy from where he was sleeping, cuddling him softly as Gibbs moved the couch back into place and went to get a washcloth to clean Tony up.

Tony stirred and opened his eyes, rubbing them tiredly, spreading the sticky mess even further over his face. Jackson looked down at the sleepy little boy in his arms and watched as Tony looked around for his daddy; not seeing him around, Tony let out a whimper and started to sniffle. Jackson cuddled him closer and patted him softly on the back, pacing the room and calming him down. Jack knew it was working when the little boy stopped sniffling and snuggled into him further.

The warm baby body brought back memories in a rush, nights just like this where he held Kelly and rocked her to sleep on many occasions. He’d loved that little girl with all his heart - he was her Grandpa, they shared a special bond, and now, just maybe, he was getting a second chance at that bond with Tony.

Gibbs returned with a warm, fresh washcloth and gently wiped over Tony’s face and hands, removing all the sticky trace, and also cleaned up the floor. Giving Tony, who was still in Jackson’s arms, a kiss on the head, he asked his dad,

“Would you mind watching him for a bit while I serve dinner out?� Knowing his dad would very much like to watch Tony and was, in a way, waiting for permission to bond with his new grandson. The relationship between his father and himself was still in repair so both were treading very carefully not to cross over any lines.

“Of course Leroy, we’ll play a while. You do what you need to.�

Gibbs made his way to the kitchen and started to serve out the dinner. He watched as his father sat on the floor with Tony in his lap, making car noises and running one of Tony’s trucks over the floor. Tony laughed in amusement and grabbed the older man’s hand, ‘helping’ to drive the truck around. Gibbs watched, a fond look sweeping over his features.

“Okay, Dinner’s up.â€� Gibbs placed the carved roast pork and vegetables on the table â€" if there was one good thing that came from his ex-wives, it was that he now knew how to make a mean baked dinner. And a baked dinner was exactly what was called for on a snowy Christmas Eve.

Dinner was eaten, the kitchen was clean, and Tony had been bathed and dressed into his new pajamas - red fleecy bottoms and a red and white fleecy top with a picture of Rudolph the reindeer on the front. Kate had found them in her lunch break and apparently ‘accidently’ bought them, stating that they would make Tony even cuter. Looking at the little boy, Gibbs had to agree.

Tony toddled into the kitchen and tugged on Gibbs’ pants,

“Da-Dee,� Gibbs looked down at his boy as Tony pointed to the empty baby bottle on the sink, “Bo�

“Do you want some milk?� Gibbs asked. Tony nodded, “Put your toys away and then you can have some, okay?� Gibbs took Tony’s small hand in his and started back to the lounge room to clean up his mess.

Tony stopped moving and looked back toward the kitchen at Jackson, letting go of Gibbs’ hand Tony walked over and held out a hand to the older man. Jackson took it, Tony looked very pleased with himself as he walked back to his dad, grabbing his hand also and slowly leading both men to the lounge room.

“It seems you grandson requires your help.� Gibbs said smiling at the older gentleman, Jackson returned the smile his eyes aglow with pride, that was right his grandson.

“Pick up your toys Tony,� Gibbs said, letting go of his little hand and bending down to pick up some of the blocks. Tony copied his dad bending down and picking up one block and car at a time and placing it back into the box (a very slow process), every so often walking over to Jackson, who was now sitting on the sofa, and depositing a toy onto his lap.

At 16 months Tony could understand basic questions and instructions well, and could say around 12 words clearly, but he still relied mostly on nonverbal communication, grunting and pointing mixed in with his gibberish, but he usually managed to get his point across.

Tony stood in the middle of the floor, pointing to the Christmas tree grunting babbling what could have been “ites�. Immediately Gibbs knew what Tony wanted, the same thing the boy wanted every night since the tree went up. Tony loved the lights - he was obsessed with them. Every night after dinner Gibbs had turned them on at the little boy’s insistence, tonight was no different.

“Okay Tony, I’ll turn the lights on now.� Gibbs flicked the switch and the tree lit up with sparkling, twinkling lights. Tony squealed and clapped his hands with joy, his eyes lighting up with glee as he watched the lights dance amongst the decorations and branches. He flopped down on his little bottom and stared at the lights, completely mesmerized. Gibbs finished cleaning up Tony’s toys and sat on the couch near his dad.

“Your boy really likes those lights, Leroy. His eyes lit up just like Bella’s used to. You could always tell what Isabella was feeling; all you had to do was look at her eyes. He’s the same, I think.� Jackson had heard from his son about Tony’s less that stellar first year of life, looking at the boy a pure innocent joy on his face it was hard to tell that it had only been a few months since he had been removed from that nightmare, Leroy had done a wonderful job with the boy and needed to be told. “Son, from what you have told me you’ve done a great job of earning the boy’s love and trust, especially considering what he’s been through. He truly is a happy little fellow now isn’t he? All you have to do is watch and you can tell how much he loves you, and how happy he is.�

“Yeah Dad, he is, thanksâ€� His tone was soft and full of love as he watched his son, “He’s also very tired.â€� Gibbs had noticed Tony rubbing his eyes more and more as they watched the lights, his little mouth opening wide at the uncontrollable yawns, his eyes getting heavier and blinking slowly, a little but sure sign he was tired â€" probably over tired since he didn’t have his nap today â€" Gibbs thought. Tony hadn’t been sleeping well with his teething, often waking up in the night crying - the boy was going to crash.

“I’ll get his bottle ready.� Jackson offered, pushing himself out of the chair slowly.

Gibbs picked Tony up from where he was sitting and cuddled him; Tony’s eyes were still shining brightly from watching the lights. Gibbs bent down behind the tree and pulled out a stocking with a blue bear wearing a Santa hat on it. The name ‘Tony� had been carefully embroidered on the front, a present from Ducky’s mother. Gibbs hung it carefully from the fireplace,

“If you’re a good boy, Santa will bring you a surprise tonight,� Tony looked up at his dad; an innocent butter wouldn’t melt expression on his face. Gibbs laughed, “Yeah, that’s what I thought.� He gave his boy another squeeze and reached down behind the tree again, this time lifting two stockings up - the names ‘Shannon’ and ‘Kelly’ emblazoned on the front of each one. Gibbs lifted them up to his lips and placed a soft kiss on each before hanging them next to Tony’s. Gibbs whispered, his voice full of emotion. “Merry Christmas Shan, Kells, we miss you.�

Jackson watched from his place in the kitchen, a tear escaping from the corner of his eye, “Merry Christmas.� He echoed silently.

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“T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house, not a creature was stirring…�

Rrriip…

“Tony no! Wait a second, let daddy turn the pages okay?� Gibbs gently took Tony’s little hand away from the book and made a mental note to stick the page back in when they had finished. Tony looked up at him, eyes shining, his half finished bottle dangling from his mouth. Jackson chuckled from his position on the couch and Gibbs smiled softly at his boy. He was enjoying the quiet, relaxing time with his son, and his dad, cuddled up on the couch, the warmth of the fire driving away the dark and the chill outside.

Gibbs leaned back into the sofa and Tony leaned back against Gibbs’ chest, pushing the bottle into his dad’s hands. Gibbs held the bottle with one hand, feeding Tony and the book in the other, reading softly. Gibbs was secretly hoping Tony would drift off to sleep. Glancing at his dad on the other chair, Gibbs was surprised to see the gleam of tears in the older mans eyes.

Jackson had so many memories running through his head, and the sight of his son so happy and content made tears of joy spring to his eyes. Many a night had Leroy read stories to his little girl and it was lovely to see his son have the ability to do it once more. Through the course of his visit Jackson had seen none of the overly gruff exterior Isabella had spoken of years ago - however, Jackson believed the softness he saw in his son was a recent development and more than likely a product of Tony’s arrival.

As Gibbs continued to read, the sucking on Tony’s bottle had slowed down, his eyes were drooping, breaths were slowing and evening out, and the grip Tony had on his daddy’s fingers had lessened. Finally, the little boy had fallen asleep.

“I’ll just put Tony to bed, it’s probably better if I keep him in with me tonight. He’s been waking during the night with his teeth coming through.� Gibbs said with a whisper to his dad, who, by the look of it, was almost asleep himself. The guest room was right next to the nursery, and with the ruckus Tony had been causing the last few nights, Gibbs didn’t want to disturb the elderly man.

Putting Tony squarely in the middle of his large bed, Gibbs laid pillows around the edges to hopefully prevent Tony from falling out. Gibbs tucked the little boy in - his angelic face was illuminated softly by the lamp on the dresser, blonde curls catching the light, his little cheeks were slightly pink and his breaths were coming out slow and steady. If he didn’t have a visitor downstairs, Gibbs probably would have gone to sleep there and then in the peacefulness and warmth of the room. Alas, he kissed the boy lightly on the top of his head and whispered the same goodnight he said every night, the same one he had said to Kelly.

“Sleepy boy, close your eyes. Daddy’s right here beside you. Close your eyes, close them tight, may you wake with morning light…. Goodnight Tony, I love you always and forever. I’ll be in soon buddy.â€� With that Gibbs left the room, heading back down to the lounge room, stopping to grab a bottle of bourbon from the kitchen and two clean glasses. Sitting back down on the couch Gibbs poured two measures of bourbon in each glass and handed one to his dad â€" They would both need some liquid courage to help the coming conversation flow freely.

After 30 minutes of silence and few more measures of courage, Jackson spoke.

“Is Santa coming to your boy this year?�

“Yeah. If Santa didn’t make a visit I think my team would be pretty disappointed, I’d never hear the end of it. I’m sure they would be more bothered by it that Tony� A small smile graced Gibbs’ face as he spoke.

“From what you mentioned of them the other night on the phone, you’re probably right. I hope you’re not going to give the boy coal, son.�

“Tony would probably enjoy eating it, if I did, but no, I brought presents - I even went out and chose them.�

Jackson chuckled then dared to ask the question,

“Do you remember the year Kelly asked for that swing set?�

---------------FLASHBACK---------------

Kelly asked for a swing set. Sitting on Santa’s lap she had asked the jolly man in the red fur suit for it. So here they were Jackson and Jethro, 11pm on Christmas Eve, outside in the freezing cold snow, which was still falling heavily, trying to workout how to put the thing together in the very little light they had shining from the back deck.

“Hell Dad, watch where you’re moving that pole to, you nearly took off my head.�

“You should watch where you’re bloody going then son,� Jackson quipped back, “Explain to me again why I agreed to help you do this?�

“Because you love Kelly, you’re her granddad, and she asked Santa for this.�

“You could have just stopped with, ‘because I love Kelly’, that’s reason enough for me.�

The two men struggled for another hour and a half trying to put the darn swing set together before it was finally done. They stood back, admiring their work as Jackson slung an arm over his son’s shoulders, “That’s some fine work there son, I think we will have one very happy little girl in the morning.�

Jethro laughed, “We sure will, now let’s go inside before we freeze to death.�

Walking towards the back glass doors, the men noticed that the lights were all off, except for the flickering lights on the Christmas tree. “Shannon must have given up on us and gone to bed.� Jethro said as he went to open the door - it didn’t budge. He jiggled the handle… nothing.

“SHIT… It’s locked, the door must have locked itself when it closed.�
“Now what? Your wife sleeps like a log, there is no way she is going to wake up and let us in.� Jackson groaned.

“We’ll have to go in through the toilet window, it’s the only one likely to be unlocked, I’ll hoist you up and you can climb through and unlatch the door. The window should be plenty big enough; I’ve gotten through there myself a few times.�

“Good, in that case you can go through the window and let me in the normal way, my bones are too old to be going through windows!�

Jethro finally agreed and after a further 30 minutes the door was unlocked and they were warm in the house and on their way to bed.

“Son, you need to make another rule about always carrying lock picks, maybe it could be rule number 23.�

“Nope, number 23 is never mess with a marine’s coffee. Night dad.�

“Night son.�

---------------END FLASHBACK---------------

Both men were laughing at the memory, and each had tears running down their faces.

“You know, Kelly came in at 4am on Christmas morning and woke both Shannon and I up. She wanted to go outside right there and then to play on those darn swings. Shan and I snuggled with her until it was a more acceptable time to get up, it was 6am when we finally gave in. I remember her running into your room and jumping on you bed and yelling ‘Santa has been grandpa’, before she took of down stairs to look out the window. She was so damn excited when she saw those swings; I thought she was going to explode with all her happy energy,� Gibbs chuckled and sniffed slightly wiping his eyes, “God she was happy.�

Shannon and Kelly had been killed the following year and everything had fallen apart. That was the last Christmas they spent together as a family, that was the last Christmas up until now that either man had celebrated, both mourning for a family lost.

Now with Tony mending the hearts of those around him, bringing love back into hollowed lives, inciting forgiveness between a father and son, both men could honestly see the light; both men knew that everything was going to be alright. Starting now.

*************************************************************************************************

OK lovely readers go ahead and leave me a wonderful comment!!!

It was 3 AM and Tony woke crying. True to form, the poor little boy’s teething was causing him grief. Gibbs had awoken to the little boy snuggling into his side and sobbing.

“It’s alright Tony…. Shh…Daddy’s here, we’ll get you all fixed up�.

After changing his diaper and wiping down the flushed little face with a cool washcloth, Gibbs took Tony back downstairs to calm him, so not to wake his dad from his slumber in the guest room down the hall. Rocking the boy softly in his arms and walking around the lounge room, Tony’s sobs became less and less.

Gibbs looked out the window - it was a clear night and the moon was reflecting on the white crisp snow that had fallen earlier that day. It was freezing and Gibbs suspected they would have more snow falling by morning. The fireplace was still burning slowly, giving off wonderful warmth and basking the lounge room with its soft, flickering glow. Everything was peaceful, and Tony had fallen asleep again with only the occasional sob escaping him. The Christmas tree stood in one corner of the room; mountains of gifts piled underneath. He and his dad had wrapped up and placed the gifts under the tree for the morning, waiting excitedly for when Tony would share his first Christmas with his new family, although Tony was still too young to fully understand the concept of Christmas it held a significant importance to both Jackson and Gibbs and they wanted to make sure Tony had a wondrous day.

Tony snuggled closer to Gibbs; burying his face further into the man’s neck, Gibbs placed another soft kiss on the boy’s head and walked over to the mantelpiece where four photos were placed.

Gibbs had gone with Abby to finish off his Christmas shopping, and they decided to take Tony to see Santa and get photos done. These were the photos sitting before him. The first one had Tony bawling his heart out on Santa’s knee, his little face red and tears streaming down his cheeks, arms reaching out to his daddy, who was thankfully off camera. The second photo had Abby grinning brightly, and an uncertain looking Tony, sitting together on Santa’s lap. The third made Gibbs chuckle, Tony had gotten his confidence back and was standing on Santa’s lap and pulling off the man’s beard and grinning cheekily, poor Santa looked a bit flushed. And the fourth made Gibbs’ heart burst, Tony was sitting on Santa’s knee, eyes sparkling and a big grin on his face.

“I’m a lucky daddy.� Gibbs whispered down to the boy in his arms. He took another fond look around the peaceful room before heading back upstairs to sleep.

***************************************

It was early, the first hint of dawn just starting to light the frosty sky, when Gibbs was woken by small hands exploring his face, gently tracing with little fingers his eyes, mouth and patting him softly on the cheek. Gibbs kept his eyes closed, enjoying the peaceful tender moment with his son - a moment which a second later was ruined by Tony shoving a small finger right up his Daddy’s nose â€" Tony had developed a fascination with noses. Gibbs’ eyes snapped open,

�Tony, that’s yucky.� His voice a little course, he softly admonished as he took hold of the small hand and removed it from his nasal passage. Tony’s bright green eyes looked at him intently, and Gibbs wrapped an arm around the boy pulling him closely into his chest, bundling the comforter around them both, trying to steal another half an hour of sleep in the comforting warmth of the bed,

“Just a little more sleep, okay buddy?� Sure it was Christmas morning, but another half an hour would really be welcome after the late night and Tony’s awakening. However sleeping was not to be, no more than 5 minutes later Tony had started to wriggle restlessly, escaping from his daddy’s arms and wriggling under the covers to the bottom of the bed, laughing and squealing as he crawled and wriggled his way under the covers and over his daddy legs.

Gibbs winced as a small foot connected with his groin, “Ok Tony, I’m up.� He sat up and uncovered Tony, who looked up at him with surprise,

“Da-Dee.� Tony smiled and wrapped his arms around his daddy’s neck, giving him slobbery kisses.

“Good morning to you too Tony,� Gibbs laughed, “Happy Christmas,� A familiar smell invaded his nostrils, “Poo Tony, you stink. Let’s change you out of that smelly diaper, then we will go make breakfast for your Poppy, hey?� Gibbs scooped up Tony to take him to the nursery to be changed, quietly creeping past the room where his dad was sleeping, Gibbs put a finger to his lips “Shhh, we have to be quiet now buddy.�

Tony copied his daddy’s actions and put a small hand up to cover his own little mouth.

“Good boy.� Gibbs whispered. Tony looked at him strangely and covered his daddy’s own mouth with his little hand. Gibbs bit back laughter but his eyes sparkled with amusement as they entered the nursery to begin the epic changing.

Jackson Gibbs awoke to the soft sounds of Jingle Bell Rock and a wondrous aroma coming from downstairs. Getting up slowly, he stretched out his limbs and tried to clear the fog from his mind. Leroy and himself had stayed up well into the night â€" or was it morning? - talking, reminiscing, wrapping gifts and drinking - Jackson suspected it was the latter which was responsible for the current haziness he felt.

Making his way downstairs and into the lounge room/kitchen area he stopped - Tony was standing in the middle of the floor still in his reindeer pyjamas, bobbing up and down to the tune of the Christmas music coming from the T.V, a pair of reindeer antlers sitting crookedly on his head and a mouth stuffed full of pancake with another pancake smooshed in his little hand. Jackson smiled widely, and looked over to where his son was making breakfast, the aroma of bacon, eggs and pancakes sent his stomach into overdrive.

“Smells good son,� Jackson announced as he walked further into the room. Tony looked up from where he was ‘dancing’ and mumbled something, a mushed up glob of pancake fell from his mouth on to the floor. Un-perplexed, Tony bent over to pick it up and shovelled it back into his mouth before anyone could stop him, “Apparently tastes good too. Tony here couldn’t bear to lose any and ate it off the floor.�

Gibbs laughed, “That’s typical Tony. If you want to take a seat, Dad, I’ll bring in breakfast.�

“Sure, son. I take it by the fact the tree looks untouched Tony hasn’t seen it yet?�

“Oh no, he saw it alright. First thing he ran over to this morning, I caught him before any damage could be done though. That’s what the music, antlers and pancakes are about…. Distractions.�

“I hope you got some good photos of that, it really was sweet.�

“I did one better, got it all here on video camera,� Gibbs held up a new video camera from the bench, “I bought one a few months ago when Tony arrived, at the insistence of the team. It took me a while to figure it out, but at least now I can get it to record. Thought it might be nice to have some memories of Tony as he grows up, although Tim - I mentioned him last night - will have to put them on a disk for me, my technological skills are limited.�

Placing plates loaded up with breakfast items on the table, Gibbs scooped Tony up off the floor and placed him in the high chair. Tony grabbed a hold of the antlers on his head and took them off, throwing them over the side of the chair

“Uhhh-Ohh!� He laughed and clapped his hands before grabbing one of the small ‘Tony sized’ pancakes his daddy had made and waved it about.

“Eat up Tony, or no presents.� Jackson scolded gently.

Tony looked over to his dad checking that it was ok, before shoving the pancake in his mouth.

“Lucky you made those small Leroy, or he’d choke.�

Gibbs and Jackson both laughed and started to tuck in on their own food.

************************************************

With breakfast done, it was time to move on with the morning. Gibbs and Jackson had both decided to shower and change before they got into the presents. Jackson went to freshen up first, while Gibbs (with Tony ‘helping’) cleaned up the kitchen. Once everything was cleaned up, and Jackson had come back down, Gibbs went to change.

Jackson sat on the couch with Tony on his lap, looking at one of Tony’s plastic books.

“Dat?� Tony said and pointed at the picture of a cat.

“That’s a cat,� Jackson said, “The cat says Meow.�

Tony nodded his head “Dat?� he repeated pointing at the ducks.

“Those are Ducks, Quack, Quack, Quack.� Jackson made the quacking noise, and tickled Tony each time he said it.

Tony giggled, “Dat?� he said pointing to the dog.

“That’s a dog.�

“Ooof, Ooof.� Tony said bouncing up and down.

“Well done, that’s right the dog says Woof Woof.� Jackson ruffled the little boy’s hair. Tony’s eyes were shining brightly with happiness as he read with his Pop and tried eating the pages.

“Your boy is smart Leroy, “ Jackson called to his son, who had just entered the kitchen, “Show your dad Tony, what does the dog say?�

“Ooof, Ooof.�

“You’re a clever boy Tony.� Gibbs said as he walked over to Tony, picking him up off Jackson’s lap and giving him a cuddle, before setting him down right in front of the tree.

“And I think clever boys need presents. You ready Tony?�

Tony’s little eyes were popping out of his head as he looked at the presents, all done up in brightly coloured paper and ribbons. The number of presents had grown significantly since the little boy had seen the tree the previous night - there were big and small presents, and one giant present from Santa for Tony that was larger than the child itself.

“Oooohh.� Tony let out a noise clearly impressed with what he saw, and wasn’t able to decide where to ‘attack’ first.

Jackson and Gibbs had thought about the possibility of Tony making a grab for the presents and, of course, his attention span left much to be desired, so all the presents for Tony were right at the front where he could get to them easily.

“Okay then, Tony, this one first huh?� Gibbs said, grabbing a present from under the tree, “Dear Tony from Poppy.� Placing the gift in front of the child. Tony looked up at him, not attempting to tear open the paper; apparently all the times Tony had been told not to touch the presents had actually sunk in, and left Tony a little unsure. Gibbs crouched down next to Tony and ripped a bit of the paper,

“It’s okay Tony, you can open it,� Gibbs ripped a little more and watched as understanding dawned on the little face, his eyes lighting up as he tore at the packaging.

“Ooooh!� Tony made an excited noise as he looked at the box “Car!�

Jackson chuckled from where he was holding the video camera, “It’s not a car Tony, it’s a Train.�

“He thinks everything with wheels is a car dad.�

Inside the box was a little wooden train set, complete with tracks, trains and carriages, which were all attached by magnets.

“Brrrrrr.� Tony made raspberry sounding car sounds as he drove the train on the floor, before trying to eat the wrapping paper.

“No Tony, don’t eat that,� Gibbs said taking the paper out of the little boys mouth, “Go say thank you to your Pop,� Gibbs pointed to Jackson and took the video camera out of his hands to film the thank you. Tony toddled off over to where Jackson sat on the sofa and struggled to climb up to the older man’s lap. Jackson hoisted him up and Tony gave him a slobbery kiss and patted him on the cheek.

Gibbs smiled with pride capturing the precious moment on camera.

The rest of the presents were unwrapped with haste. Tony was definitely spoilt; new cars, movies, toys and clothes were piled high on the coffee table.

“You don’t think you went a little overboard Leroy?� Jackson said as he piled up more of Tony’s gifts.

“This coming from the man who brought his grandson half a toy shop…�

“Point taken… Although we could have just gotten him a box, he seems to be more interested in that than anything else.�

The giant box, which once housed a ride-on/push along car, was giving the boy much enjoyment as he crawled in and out, closing himself up in the box and popping back out again with a giggle. He was having a little trouble manoeuvring however, as he was currently wearing a much too large football jersey â€" a gift from his daddy. Even though it was a t-shirt the sleeves were rolled up so he could use his little hands, and he kept tripping over the bottom of it (which was much too long) and bunching up on the floor. Tony would be wearing it for many years to come, and Gibbs looked forward to the father/son bonding time over football they would have as Tony got older -The way Tony could throw things now, the kid was going to have a heck of an arm as he grew. Gibbs thought proudly.

The two men spent the afternoon playing with Tony, pushing him around on his ride on car and building the train set, which they ran around and under the coffee table. Tony was so distracted he didn’t even try to destroy the tree once, instead he was a perfect angel, relishing the time he was spending with his Daddy and Pop.

“Catch!� Gibbs called, as he threw the new soft stuffed football at Tony. Tony tried to catch it but his co-ordination wasn’t quite there yet and the ball rolled away. Tony toddled after it, picking it up off the floor and taking off, racing past his daddy’s legs. Gibbs fake-tackled the little boy, hoisting him up in the air and rolling on the floor on his back with Tony held up in the air by strong arms. “Got ya.� Gibbs said as he tickled the boy. Tony laughed and laughed, before he was put back on the ground. Tony gave his daddy a cheeky grin and took off again, apparently liking the new game. After close to an hour of the gentlest roughhousing ever seen, Gibbs was exhausted, and Tony looked about ready to drop as well.

Jackson, who had been sitting comfortably on the couch watching the spectacle, chuckled to himself as Gibbs rubbed his knee as he stood.

“That’s what you get, Leroy, for playing rough.�

“Ha, ha, very funny, Dad,� Gibbs said with a grimace, “I think it might be quiet time now. I’ll put on one of Tony’s Disney movies and we can relax. With any hope he’ll have a rest.�

The two men settled on the couch and started the movie with Tony snuggled up in-between, pacifier in his mouth â€" which he had found under the couch - and head on his daddy’s lap.

An hour into the movie, Tony had fallen asleep. Gibbs looked down at his baby boy curled into his lap and patted the blonde curls fondly, Gibbs couldn't imagine his life without Tony now, in the few months Gibbs had been his daddy, he had brought so much joy into his life, a contentment to his soul, one which he had thought he had lost forever. Of course he still missed Shannon and Kelly always would, but with Tony by his side it made the pain fade and gave him something to look-forward to every morning.

**********************************************************

“Times getting on, I guess we should start cleaning up a bit, put some of these toys away. Good time to start while he’s still sleeping - he can’t get into anything while he’s like that,� Jackson gestured to the sleeping bundle on the couch, “Although I have to admit he has been an angel today.�

“There are a few more hours of the day left yet, Dad. “ Gibbs laughed quietly.

“Sure, but even ‘Tornado’ Tony can’t be trouble everyday.“ Jackson joked back to his son.

“When we’re done I’ll warm up the Christmas pudding and custard. I think we can skip dinner tonight since we stuffed ourselves with leftovers for lunch.� Gibbs lifted a pile of toys in his arms to take upstairs as he spoke.

“Sounds like a brilliant idea, I love brandy custard.� Jackson commented as he followed his son upstairs with another armful of gifts to put away.

It took them a good half hour to put the toys away in Tony’s room (the kid had quite a collection), but finally it was done.

“Now; for pudding and custard, I’ll get it, if you want to go back to the lounge room?� Gibbs asked as he walked down the stairs, and into the kitchen.

“Aww Hell!� Both men exclaimed as they saw Tony sitting next to the open fridge the plastic container of custard spilled open and Tony happily finger-painting with in on the floor. He was absolutely coated in it, all over his clothes, in his hair, covering his face, there even looked to be some up his nose - the yellow mess was everywhere. Both men were shell-shocked.

“I take it back. Tony really can be trouble everyday.� Jackson stood, eyes wide, as he surveyed the scene.

Gibbs crossed the kitchen and lifted Tony up at arms length, a small smile on his face, as he held Tony out to the older man - sure they wouldn’t get custard this year, but they did get family and Tony; Gibbs wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Merry Christmas Dad!�

****************************************************

And there you go, Christmas Gibbs and Tony style! As always please review and leave a comment..... Im still figuring out how to reply to them.... But seriously Thank you to everyone whom has Commented so far, keep it up!

"No!"

"Yes"

"NO!"

Leroy Jethro Gibbs was 'the boss', a hardened marine (no such thing as an ex), who was leader of the top MCRT at NCIS. He was used to making the rules, barking out orders and having his orders followed. And yet here he was having a Mexican standoff with his son, who had discovered the 'no' word and was running around the house stark naked. It wasn't so much the naked part that was worrisome, as the house was quite warm inside; it was more the no diaper on a un-toilet trained terror part that troubled Gibbs. In the recent weeks Tony had discovered the joys of being diaper-free and would remove it randomly. Needless to say the outcome of those adventures had been catastrophic and something that Gibbs had no intention of repeating anytime soon â€" the rug in the study would never be the same.

"Yes, Tony. Come here and put your diaper on please."

"No peeese." Tony's green eyes sparkled with mischief as he looked at his daddy who was crouched in front of him. Tony wiggled his bare bottom before taking off again as fast as his little legs could carry him. Gibbs sighed and stood up from the floor with a crack of his knees and chased after Tony who was laughing manically and yelling "Da-dee, poop!" over and over at the top of his voice. At 20 months, Tony's vocabulary expanded, although his voice was still quite babyfied and could sometimes be a little hard to understand if you weren't used to it (all very normal for a child his age Gibbs was assured).

It took Gibbs a further 5 minutes to catch his son, and another 10 to wrestle a diaper and clothes on the boy. Tony had been in an uncooperative mood all morning and Gibbs suspected it had something to do with the fact that this was the first time in 3 weeks that father and son had been able to spend some proper time together. NCIS had been involved in an undercover operation involving possible terrorist activity aboard a Naval Ship, and of course the services of NCIS' top MCRT had been sought. The past few weeks saw Gibbs leaving earlier than usual in the mornings and often arriving late home at night when Tony was already sleeping. The moments father and son had spent together were brief and neither party was impressed with the situation.

Although Tony was relatively adept to change in his routine, 3 weeks without daddy was a little much for Gibbs' baby boy to handle, and he was making his displeasure known. At least today Gibbs had till midday with his son before the team would arrive and they would leave to meet with their undercover contact, who had some new information to pass on.

Gibbs' thoughts were interrupted by the growl of Tony's hungry tummy. Tony laughed at the noise it made and lifted up his shirt,

"Uhh-Oh!" He said as he stuck a little finger in his bellybutton and giggled.

Gibbs scooped him up off the floor and took him into the kitchen for lunch,

"Are you hungry Tony?" Gibbs asked, putting him into his highchair.

"Mmmm, ess," Tony nodded his head, and looked at his dad thoughtfully, " I-afoo peese."

"Yeah, I'll get you food buddy." Gibbs went to the kitchen to warm up some lunch for Tony - leftover chicken, peas and carrots. I can at least make sure he is eating a healthy meal before I go â€" Gibbs thought bitterly. He really wanted to spend longer with his boy; he had really missed their time together over the past few weeks.

Tony ate with gusto and cleared his plate, all except his peas,

"Ucky!" He exclaimed picking up a green little pea and squishing it in his fingers.

"Tony, eat your peas." Gibbs ruffled his little boy's hair.

"NO!"

Gibbs gave a frustrated sigh, "Tony eat your peas, be a good boy for daddy."

"NO! Ucky" Tony picked up another pea and threw it at his dad laughing,

Gibbs was about to say something when there was a knock at the door.

"Hey Boss," Tim McGee entered the house, "I have all the equipment we need in the car, the meet is in an hour and a half aboard the Turkish ship Bakir Kamir. We should leave in about 30mins; gives us time to set up."

Over the past few months with the increased 'team bonding' McGee's confidence had soared and he could now hold a conversation or indeed a Sit-Rep with his boss without the stuttering â€" well usually, unless Gibbs was in a particularly foul mood.

Gibbs nodded his response and headed back into the kitchen to check Tony,

"Where are Ziva and Kate?" He called over his shoulder.

"Should be here in about 5 minutes." McGee took a seat on the sofa and made himself comfortable.

Gibbs took Tony's empty plate back to the kitchen, "Atta boy Tony, eating all your peas." Tony just smiled at him innocently, and lifted his arms up to be taken out of the chair. Gibbs sat him on the floor, and the little boy took off towards McGee, giving him a hug and wiping his grubby hands on the man's pants.

"Thanks Tony." McGee said, exasperated. Tony giggled and hightailed it into his daddy's legs, grabbing on to the leg tightly and sitting on his foot.

And that was how Gibbs answered the door; walking slowly with Tony attached to his leg, hanging on for dear life.

"Gibbs." Both Ziva and Kate spoke at once, before seeing Tony.

"Hello, baby." Kate said looking at the smiling boy and moving further into the house. Ziva picked Tony up off the floor, with Tony protesting at being made to let go of his daddy's leg.

"Oh Gibbs, I think he is wet, yes?" She said, patting the diaper, "I shall change him."

Before Gibbs could even mutter a reply, she had whisked Tony off to the bathroom to change him, and Kate had made her way into the kitchen to make coffee.

This was his life - in the months since Tony had come into their lives the team had banded together and become a family. At work he was still the same gruff, order-barking, second b for bastard as he had always been, but at home he was happy to relax and sit back, slowly opening up to his team, his family, as they invaded his life. Walking back to the kitchen Gibbs grabbed a coffee from Kate and sat on the couch to relax for a brief moment when he heard Ziva call out.

"Ah, Gibbs?"

"Yeah?" He yelled

"Why does Tony have peas in his diaper?"

McGee piped up, "Firstly Ziva, its pee. Secondly, he is a baby, he is supposed to pee in his diaper." Tim shook his head incredulously and smirked.

After a moment Ziva came downstairs with a freshly changed Tony, "No McGee, it is peas, a handful of green peas in his diaper?"

Kate laughed from where she had sat at the table, and Gibbs shook his head, suddenly finding his arms full of wriggling little boy, "That explains where his ones from lunch disappeared to so quickly." Gibbs smiled at Tony and put a kiss on top of his head.

"Who is looking after Tony today?" Kate asked, chuckling at the site before her; Tony was trying vehemently to shove his pacifier into his daddy mouth saying "Da-Dee leep."

"No Tony, daddy isn't going to sleep." Gibbs held the little hand gently, stopping Tony in his tracks.

"Nola is coming; she should be here in a few minutes."

Nola was the lovely old lady down the street who looked after Tony a couple of days during the week - usually three days a week; Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Tony was at the daycare at the Naval yard the other two (Gibbs tried to be home on weekends where possible) â€" she also did the odd emergency weekend of babysitting when Gibbs, Ducky, Jackson or the team were occupied. Today was one of those emergency weekends.

At the mention of Nola's name Tony snuggled closer into his daddy's chest. It wasn't that Tony didn't like Nola â€" he loved the older woman â€" it was more that when Nola came over it meant his daddy was going somewhere, and Tony did not want his daddy going anywhere.

McGee answered the door when Nola arrived,

"Hello, Tim." Nola smiled and gave him a hug â€" she really was a typical nanna type. Walking into the lounge room, Nola addressed the rest of the team giving each a hug, before she spoke to Tony

"Hello, Anthony my cheeky boy, are you going to help me bake cookies today?" her voice soft and kind, Tony just snuggled again into his dad and pouted staying silent.

The team all got up and left, "We will meet you in the car, Gibbs." Ziva stated as they all left. They knew when it came to Tony saying goodbye to his daddy over the past few weeks it was easier if they left Gibbs to it. Saying goodbye to Tony was like ripping off a band-aid - better to do it quickly; it was less painful for everyone.

Tony started crying as soon as Gibbs stood up, grabbing onto his daddy's shirt and refusing to let go as Nola tried to take him into her arms.

"No Da-dee" he cried, his eyes shining with tears "No go… Toh-nee Da-dee….NO!" Tony's wails were getting louder and louder, and tears were streaking his cheeks.

"It's okay Tony, yeah I'm Tony's daddy, I'll be home soon I promise. Shhh…." Gibbs pried Tony's little fingers from his shirt, handing the screaming bundle over to the elderly lady. Gibbs wasn't worried about Nola's ability to control Tony like this, she had grandchildren of her own and was used to the tantrums - Nola was a tough cookie. Tony wriggled out of Nola's arms and threw himself on the floor grabbing his daddy's foot kicking and screaming, having a full-blown tantrum. He usually wasn't this bad at goodbyes, but something, Gibbs thought, was off about today, and it made his gut churn.

"Da-Dee!" He wailed over and over, "Mine Da-dee!" Tony was working himself into a state, so Gibbs knelt down and ran his fingers through Tony's curls, his throat constricting painfully as he fought of his own emotions.

"Be a good boy Tony, daddy will be back soon. I love you." Gibbs picked Tony up off the floor and handed him back to Nola who was looking at him sympathetically. Kissing the boy on the forehead he left the house, and as the door closed behind him he heard Tony's anguished cry, " No, Da-dee!"

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Gibbs awoke in a panic as a flash of memory embedded itself in his mind. There were people standing over him - one man, a Dr Mallard, professed to know him, although he held no recognition ever meeting the man. He didn't know where he was, or how he got there, but he remembered an explosion and the events before it, he remembered being in his CO's office and then...

Oh God, Shannon and Kelly…

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Dr 'Ducky' Mallards heart was breaking, as it had every night since the explosion which stole 15 years of his dear friends memory. Each night since, he would take his grandson home and watch with a heavy heart as the lost looking little boy searched the house for his daddy â€" a daddy whom didn't even remember he existed. Jethro was awake and Ziva had informed them that after her impromptu visit to the hospital he could now recall his team but not of their newfound bond - he had been able to give vital information pertaining to the case, but sadly he still had absolutely no recollection of his son. The doctors had instructed everyone not to force memories upon Jethro as it could hinder his recovery, and for this reason neither the team nor anyone else had mentioned Tony. Especially since the lapse in memory had brought up painful memories of Shannon and Kelly, and, in Jethro's muddled mind had made it seem as if it was only yesterday that they were lost to him. They needed to protect Tony, and indeed Gibbs if things went bad.

Walking into the dark house, Ducky flipped on the lights and placed Tony on the floor. The little boy took off immediately in search of his daddy. From his place in the kitchen, where he was warming a bottle of milk, Ducky could here Tony's baby voice calling,

"Da-Dee… wareooo?" As he searched each room, getting more and more panicky as room after room turned up empty. It had been decided after the initial incident that Ducky would look after Tony at Jethro's house to minimize the disturbance to the little boy. However, he was now beginning to doubt the wisdom in that as he watched Tony wander around the familiar surroundings broken hearted. Tony was mostly fine during the day barring a couple of episodes, usually the only hint something was wrong was the sparkle missing from his eyes, the normally expressive green orbs were dull and listless; but it was at night the little boy fell apart.

As Tony's routine search came to an end he started to sob, hiccoughing and taking huge gulps of air tears rolling over his cheeks and clinging to his eyelashes.

"Ohh Anthony, my dear sweet boy." Ducky crooned as he lifted the child into his arms,

"Mine… *hiccough* Da-dee…. Pa." Tony could barely breathe through his sobs, his whole body shaking with distress. Ducky rubbed soothing circles on the little boy's back and whispered softly holding him close,

"It's okay… Your father will be home soon… There, there… Shhh." In truth, Dr Mallard had no idea what was going to happen. Tony was too young to understand and the child desperately missed his daddy.

Grabbing the warm bottle from the counter Ducky took Tony upstairs and went into Jethro's bedroom. Tony had developed a habit the past few nights, of climbing out of his crib and sleeping on his father's bed. Ducky had given up trying to put him back in his own crib as the poor boy would only cry and climb out again, and had therefore, resigned himself to letting the little boy sleep in his daddy's bed. Laying Tony down on the bed, Ducky sat beside him slowly feeding the warm milk to the heartbroken baby through his sobs, hiccoughs and tears, carding his fingers through his grandson's hair soothingly as Tony cried himself to sleep again, mumbling 'Da-dee' and 'Pa' over and over.

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Tim McGee had been left in the bull pen with Tony; he was in charge of watching the boy until Ducky had come back from signing his leave papers â€" so he could take care of Tony while Gibbs' memory returned.

"Hi." Tony waved up at McGee from where he was playing under the desk and gave a small soft, almost shy smile - nothing like his usual grins but still a smile nonetheless. McGee continued to type as Tony babbled away, playing with his cars and trying to pull McGee's shoes off. All of a sudden the computer screen went black,

"Uhh-Oh…" Tony held out the power plug he had pulled from the socket. McGee sighed and bent down to remove Tony from the floor and put the plug back in.

'Whack'. Tim's head connected with the table and Tony laughed, a sound that had been all too absent from the usually happy child â€" I'd give myself a concussion if it would make Tony laugh more - Tim thought as he tickled Tony, rewarded by more giggles from the boy. Rebooting the computer and settling Tony on his lap, McGee began to type again, without much luck.

Tony kept reaching out his little hands and pressing the keys, causing McGee's sentences to become a jumble of letters, numbers and random spaces. Tim silently wished that Ziva would come out of MTAC or Kate would return from Abby's lab and help him but, alas, he was on his own.

The desk phone rang and McGee answered awkwardly as Tony tried to take it off him,

"Agent McGee… Yeah ok… Will be right up…Bye," Hanging up, he stood and put Tony on his shoulders, "Okay, Tony, we get to go to MTAC now. It's like a big T.V - you'll love it. You know when you're older I'm going to show you all the fun you can have up there."

Tony, who really had no idea what McGee was going on about, just patted his surrogate big brothers hair,

"Toh-nee up." He said, sounding very impressed at being so high, and was giggling all the way up to MTAC.

As the two entered MTAC they could hear the loud, angry voices reverberating around the enclosed space. McGee stood Tony on the floor and entered further into the room, little boy following closely behind.

"I warned you… I told you this was going to happen, all those lives wasted and for what? Huh, tell me director, because I would really like to know!" Gibbs' voice was booming, his eyes burning and sending daggers at Director Sheppard. The images of the burning ship on the MTAC screen gave away what had just happened.

"Jethro… Agent Gibbs… Enough!"

"Enough. You're right there Director, I am not going to stand here and watch people die while you try not to step on the toes of any of your friends up on the hill."

"Is this what you think this is about, my friends on the hill?" Jenny yelled right back,

The tension in the room was electric, voices were raised and McGee noticed Ziva standing in the corner, watching the exchange warily; ready to step in if needed. He snuck around to stand beside her, whereas everyone else had wisely vacated the room.

Tony, however, stood stock still, unmoving, his eyes wide and fixed on the form of his yelling father, all previous excitement upon seeing his daddy evaporated as he watched the angry man in front of him. He had never heard his daddy yell this loud, or seen him this angry and the little boy was shocked and frightened. As the angry words continued, Tony began to quietly sob, tears fell silently from shocked eyes.

Turning on his heel, Gibbs stormed out of MTAC and slammed the door, not even noticing the distressed little boy as he went past.

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Things were so mixed up in his mind; the accident and memory loss he had suffered had brought back to the surface all the emotions and anger he held at the deaths of Shannon and Kelly, and he was struggling to maintain composure. Although it had happened years ago the lapse in memory had made it feel as though it was only yesterday, and the feelings had returned as raw as ever. He had done what he needed to, effectively retiring from NCIS during his heated argument with Director Shephard and saying goodbye to his team (with the exception of Dr Mallard who was apparently occupied) he was now heading off to Mexico to stay with his mentor, Mike Franks. Hopefully Mike would help him to fill in some of the gaps in his memory of the past 15years.

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Ducky made his way over to his car, which he had parked close to the front of the NCIS building instead of the usual parking garage, and placed Tony inside strapping him in tightly. Walking over to the driver's side, he spied Jethro. He had truly hoped to catch the man before he left, but had spent a considerable amount of time trying to calm Tony down after the MTAC incident. Sighing, he gave Tony a quick look before walking over towards where Jethro was now standing. It was now or never - damn the doctor's orders, Gibbs needed a reason to stay and not run to Mexico and Ducky couldn't think of a better reason than Tony.

"Jethro, wait!" The elderly M.E called across the parking area. Gibbs looked up and paused.

"Ducky, I was going to say goodbye but you were occupied."

"Indeed I was my dear friend. If I may ask, why exactly are you leaving?"

Gibbs gave a small smile which looked more like a grimace, "I need to sort things out in my head, Duck. Things are jumbled, years and moments are missing. I need to get things right, I need time."

"But you are needed here Jethro, you're needed by myself, Abby, your team… and your son."

Jethro looked momentarily stunned, before an icy haunted look passed his eyes, "I don't have a son." Gibbs' voice was choked and tense, "I had a daughter and a wife and they died. You know this. There are no reasons to stay."

"You said it yourself Jethro, that there were pieces of your memory missing - this is one of those missing pieces, the biggest piece. You have a son, and he is at this very moment sitting in my car, he is just shy of 2 years old and is truly the most delightful little fellow. He was Isabella DiNozzo's boy - she died and left him with you a little over 8 months ago; you are now his father. He is your responsibility; he is missing you immensely, he is your reason to stay!" Ducky's tone was almost pleading as spoke, and for once in his life he stated the facts not embellishing with a long-winded story as he usually did, just bare facts. He watched as emotions flashed in his friend's eyes, unfortunately - of all the things he saw flash in those intense blue eyes, not one of them was recognition.

"I…. I don't remember…. I'm so…."

Gibbs' words were cut off by the squeal of tires as a car careened around the corner, fishtailing out of control. The two men watched in horrific slow motion as the car headed straight toward Ducky's.

Images flashed in Gibbs mind, a baby on his doorstep covered in dirt and blood, a cheeky little boy grinning and getting into all kinds of mischief looking at him innocently, blonde curls and first steps melted together with memories of sparkling green eyes, soft loving cuddles and one word 'Da-dee'!

Gibbs was running full pelt as the out of control car slammed into the side of Ducky's Morgan, a grief-stricken cry escaping his lips.

"TONY!"

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I know evil cliffhanger.... What will happen to poor little Tony and how will Gibbs cope? All will be revealed, the more you review the faster I write....

But seriously I was worried with this chapter, I tried to put an awful lot into it and a lot of emotions also, I'm not sure I got it quite right so please let me know what you thought?

As Tony is now getting older and talking more I will need some help, I haven't been around toddlers for a long time and I have forgotten their speech, so If you have any cute mixed up words that any young ones use or get mixed up with let me know so I can try make Tony's speech more believable?
Also do you want me to try and write accented for Tony's speech things like the "da-dee", "leep" and "ucky"or do you all prefer me to just write "daddy", "sleep" and "yucky" when Tony talks and you can baby it up in your own minds (as someone suggested). I like the "Da-dee" and "leep" better personally makes it a little more real but am happy to do either? After all this story is for you guys!

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Previously:

Images flashed in Gibbs' mind, a baby on his doorstep covered in dirt and blood, a cheeky little boy grinning and getting into all kinds of mischief; looking at him innocently, blonde curls and first steps melted together with memories of sparkling green eyes, soft loving cuddles and one word - 'Da-dee'!

Gibbs was running full pelt as the out of control car slammed into the side of Ducky's Morgan, a grief-stricken cry escaping his lips.

"TONY!"

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He sat frozen to the spot; the only movement was the slight trembling of his body from shock, loss and pain. His stoic expression gave no indication to the grief he felt inside, so raw, so agonizing it was tearing at his very soul. The only evidence of that grief was playing across his ice blue eyes, eyes that despite the situation shed not a tear, but which blazed with anguish and desperation, eyes that were fixated on the small white coffin before him.

He'd seen the twisted metal and the shattered glass of the vehicle, and yet the whole scenario was still hard to comprehend - it seemed as though he was caught up in some hellish nightmare. However, the first night back in his all too silent house, compounded now with seeing the small white coffin adorned in white roses, was drumming home to him the all too terrifying reality.

Gibbs was barely aware of the other mourners who had gathered together to say their goodbyes. Instead, his thoughts were occupied with all the 'firsts' he would never see, all the dreams that would never be reached, all the hugs, kisses, laughter and love that would never again brighten his day. The outpouring of sympathy, the whispers and murmurs of "I'm sorry for your loss" didn't mean a thing. Nothing meant anything anymore.

And as the small coffin was slowly lowered into the ground, Gibbs' heart shattered into a million pieces, his world crumbled down leaving only darkness, as a single tear trickled down his cheek.

**************************************

No one should ever have to bury a child, Gibbs thought bitterly and today he had come close - too damn close - to burying another. Memories of the day he buried Kelly flashed vividly through his mind in shocking accuracy and made his heart ache at the remembrance. However there was also another reason for his now aching heart and that reason his son, Tony, was lying completely still in the small cot before him in the pediatrics' ward of the hospital. His frame looked smaller and more fragile than usual with various wires attaching him to a machine monitoring his vital signs. An oxygen mask practically covering his too pale face, bright white bandages around his head, and his arm where an IV line was pumping who knows what into his small body. Tony was wearing nothing but a diaper and Gibbs could see the bruising from the poor boy's cracked ribs starting to appear, he could also see the various cuts on his arms and legs from the shattered glass of the windows, some of which had required stitches. It hurt to see his little boy this way, but what had really stabbed at his soul was what happened when Tony had been freed from the car.

******* FLASHBACK*********

"TONY!"

The agonized yell was torn from his lips, he remembered now. He could hear the slapping of his feet against the pavement as he raced over to Ducky's vehicle (The older man running just behind him). A couple of bystanders were already calling an ambulance. The man driving the other car was conscious and had a large gash above his eye and, from the amount of blood pouring from his face, what looked to be a possible broken nose from the air bag deployment. Gibbs didn't stop to look, instead letting the other bystanders take care of the injured man; his focus was on the Morgan and the little boy it held inside.

The driver side of the car had taken the worst of the impact. It was completely crushed - windows shattered, metal bent and buckled… The passenger side was not much better. The force of the impact had pushed the car and it was now wedged between the light post (which looked in danger of falling over) and the other vehicle. The sight was sickening to say the least but the most terrifying part of the whole mess was the complete and total silence being emitted from the car - nothing, not a peep.

Gibbs peered into the shattered window and his breath caught in his throat. Tony had a gash on his forehead which was bleeding sluggishly - numerous other cuts and scrapes covered his little arms and legs and his face was pale, his eyes closed. In desperation Gibbs tried to open the door of the car to reach the little boy, but nothing would budge. Ducky was trying to get in the other side but again nothing.

It was then that Gibbs heard the most beautiful sound in the world - a soft whimpering as Tony started to stir from his unconscious state. The whimpering soon turning in to screams as consciousness returned fully, but despite the heartbreak in those screams Gibbs could only feel joy - a screaming Tony was an alive Tony.

It felt like hours, everything moving in slow motion, but in fact it was only about 10 minutes after the initial accident that the emergency service personnel managed to cut open the car and free Tony - who was in a right state as the shock and pain caught up to him.

As the EMT's started to assess the little boy for injuries, Gibbs sat by his side and tried to comfort him. However, that only seemed to make things worse. His screaming got louder and more desperate and he started to thrash about even more, his pain-filled, unfocussed green eyes were looking about wildly for something - or someone. It was only when Ducky appeared that Tony calmed down, if only slightly, and reached out frantically for the older man. Ducky took him into his arms and tried to calm him and hold him still while the EMT's continued their assessment, all the while Tony continued to scream in pain and confusion, clinging to his 'Pa' like a lifeline.

Gibbs' face must have betrayed the crushing emotion he felt at Tony's rejection, as Ducky was looking at him with sympathy while soothing the boy in his arms. Suddenly, Gibbs realized with dawning horror that yes, he remembered.

But so did Tony.

****END FLASHBACK*****

Gibbs was pulled from his memories by a soft pat to his shoulder,

"Jethro." Dr (Ducky) Mallard spoke softly.

"What'd the Doctor say, Duck?" Gibbs spoke without turning to face his old friend, his son's Grandpa; instead he continued to stare at Tony's face. He looked so peaceful, a complete opposite to the screaming mess he was when first brought in. Being mindful not to bump or disturb any of the bandaging on the poor boy's head, Gibbs ran a hand through the damp curls of Tony's hair, sweat from his rising temperature matting them together.

"Dr Morrissey says young Anthony was very lucky," Ducky looked fondly at the small boy on the bed. "His rising temperature is most likely due to the shock and trauma the dear boy has been through today. However, they are monitoring him closely and increasing the dose of antibiotic as a precaution. Despite Anthony's concussion he is sedated at the moment, and they will start to wean him off and wake him in the next few hours. At that stage they will start with more of the pain medication if needed. Sedating someone after a head trauma is not always the best course of treatment - however, it was quite necessary for young Anthony when they removed the glass shards and stitched up the worst of the wounds."

Ducky stopped briefly, emotion getting caught in his own throat at the description and the realization at how close he had come to losing his grandson. He reached over and gently placed his hand on the little boy's arm. Taking a deep breath he began again.

"Dr Morrissey is keen to end sedation, she insists it was the best course of treatment and I have to agree with her assessment. They are, again, monitoring him closely; the oxygen mask is just a precaution and will be removed once he wakes. He has two cracked ribs from the seatbelt, and some bruising, which although painful will be controlled by the pain medication and should heal quite nicely in a few weeks. Angela, sorry, I should say Dr Morrissey, will be in to wrap and stabilize Anthony's ribs soon."

Ducky sat in the chair on the other side of the cot and watched his friend's face as he digested the information, Gibbs raised his gaze from his son's face to look him in the eye and spoke with raw emotion clearly echoing in his tone,

"So….. He will be okay, Duck?"

"Yes, Jethro, he will be fine. His ribs will take a couple of weeks to heal properly, but he will be alright."

"Thank god, I thought …. Geez, I nearly lost him, Duck…"

Ducky saw the hope flash in his friends eyes, before that hopeful look was replaced by one of self-hatred. Jethro didn't have to say anything - his eyes said it all. He was blaming himself for this, for the fact that his son was hurting physically - but moreover emotionally. Normally his friend could hide his feelings quite well, but he was still injured himself, exhausted beyond reason, his emotions and memories still wreaking havoc on the normally infallible man.

"Jethro, it's not your fault. You were caught in an explosion and lost your memory. That is not your fault. You were injured and confused; you shouldn't have even been out of hospital yet, let alone up in MTAC. And Anthony didn't mean to push you away; he is too young to understand. He was hurting, injured and his concussion was confusing him. Let him rest, show him love and in a day or two things will be fine again. You'll see"

Gibbs grunted, but made no other reply as his focus shifted again to the boy in the bed.

********************************

True to Ducky's word, things had taken a couple of days to settle down. The first day was a disaster. From the moment Tony awoke from his sedation he cried, soothed only by his 'Pa' and an increase in the pain medication. Tony sobbed even in his sleep and refused to leave the safety of his pa's arms. The little boy didn't go to his daddy once, and cried every time Gibbs came close to him or was left alone with him. Ducky felt torn between comforting the little boy and comforting his daddy - who looked worn out, tormented, and was battling the guilt that threatened to overcome him.

The second day was slightly better, Tony still hid himself behind his 'Pa' and would still only go to the older gentleman, but at least he wasn't crying quite as much - he was still quite groggy for most of the day, but the pain medication was definitely having a positive effect on the little boy's comfort.

Tony still whimpered when Gibbs tried to take him, but he actually looked at his daddy and gave him a shy smile, when Gibbs brought him a new toy car. Gibbs for his part had not left Tony's side except to hit the head and for the occasional cup of coffee.

Ducky was glad he had told the team not to visit until he gave them the go ahead, and Jethro himself had called his father and explained to Jackson why he needed to delay his visit for a few more days. Jethro and his son needed some time together to get their relationship back on track, and overwhelming Tony with people wasn't the way to do that.

Of course, Ducky was also protecting his dear friend. Despite the team being as close as family, and Gibbs now remembering that fact, Ducky was still rather sure that Jethro would not appreciate the team seeing him looking so lost. Abby, being Abby, protested the most, but when Ducky and Gibbs had both explained why things had to be the way they were she did eventually acquiesce.

It was the beginning of the third day that things started to get back to normal. Ducky was sitting with Tony on his lap telling him a story, when Jethro walked through the door. Tony looked up at his daddy with glazed green eyes and smiled. Not the shy smile from the day before, but a happy smile (only slightly dulled by the painkillers the doctors had him on).

"Da-Dee," Tony spoke and slowly lifted the book towards his dad. "Ook." he said as he handed the story over. Gibbs sat on a chair next to Ducky and took the book from his boy.

"That's a good book Tony. Three Little Pigs - they huff and puff and blow the house down." Gibbs blew lightly onto Tony's face and the little boy giggled softly, but then grimaced as the giggles irritated his ribs. Tony's pain was being managed by the medication in his drip, and for the most part kept everything dulled as long as he was kept quiet and made no sudden movements where his ribs were concerned.

Guilt shone in Gibbs eyes as he realized Tony was in pain from the laughter, but before he had a chance to dig into that pit of self-reproach, Ducky stood and put the little boy on his father's lap.

"I must pop out for a moment, Jethro, I need to go home briefly, gather a change of clothing and call Mother. I shall be back in an hour or two. Will you be alright?"

"Sure thing, Duck - could you swing by the house and grab Tony some pajamas and a couple of toys?"

"Ah, yes of course." Ducky ruffled Tony's hair lightly and patted Gibbs on the shoulder before leaving.

Tony looked a little apprehensive as Ducky left the room, but was soon snuggled gently against Gibbs' chest, playing softly with his daddy's fingers as the story was continued.

The drugs kicked back in, making the little boy sluggish and dopey. Before he knew it, Gibbs found himself more comfortable, content and at ease than he had felt in days and, arms full of sleeping toddler, his own eyelids felt very heavy.

The sight that greeted Ducky on his arrival back into the hospital made his heart soar. Both Jethro and Anthony had fallen asleep, Jethro was snoring quietly and Anthony looked totally at peace, a far cry from the fitful sleep he had been getting over the past few days.

Ducky sat opposite the sleeping figures, content to watch over them.

After two weeks of what could only be described as 'Hell', things were starting to look up.

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On the fourth day, things were going great. The relationship between Gibbs and Tony was back on track. Although Gibbs' guilt was still grinding away at him, he pushed it aside as Tony was slowly improving, his body getting used to the medications and reacting better to them as they kept the pain from his ribs and other injuries at bay - all effects from his concussion were now also gone.

Dr Morrissey had decided to try Tony with some solid foods; a small bowl of oatmeal was given to Gibbs with strict instructions to try to get Tony to eat a little bit, but not to overdo it. Ducky had decided to use the morning to pop into NCIS and sign off on some paperwork; which in the trauma of the past few days had been forgotten.

So there they were. Gibbs was seated on the side of the cot trying to coax Tony into eating something, and finally after numerous airplane and car noises Tony had eaten a mouthful.

"Atta-boy." Gibbs smiled and praised his son. Tony decided eating was not so bad after all, and opened his mouth eagerly again for more. Gibbs watched his son with pride - Tony had regained some of his usual coloring and was looking less washed out than he had yesterday, his eyes still had a glazed look to them from the pain medication but Gibbs could make out the mischievous spark underneath. The brave little boy was still smiling through his pain, albeit not quite as brightly as normally, but the smile was still there.

Tony had eaten about four mouthfuls, when he had decided that was enough and stubbornly refused to open his mouth.

"Come on, Tony, just a little more."

"Toh-nee, no," Tony looked up at him, and pushed the spoon back towards Gibbs. "Da-Dee foo."

Gibbs chuckled. "No, Tony, it's not Daddy's food. You need to eat it, so you can get better."

Tony looked confused for a moment, and then stood up on the cot so he was level with his daddy's face. Hazy green eyes met bright blue as Tony leant over and put a kiss on his daddy's cheek. "Da-dee beh'ha."

Tears sprung to Gibbs' eyes as Tony mimicked what he himself had done many times when Tony was hurt or unhappy - giving him a kiss to make it all better.

"Yeah, buddy, daddy's all better now. Thank you."

Happy with the response, Tony sat back down but still refused to eat.

"Just two more mouthfuls, Tony, then no more I promise." Gibbs lifted the spoon back towards his son who rolled his tired looking eyes and unenthusiastically opened his mouth.

"One." Gibbs counted.

"Uhhnn." Tony repeated with his mouth still full, as Gibbs loaded up the last spoonful.

Tony shook his head slightly, and clamped his mouth shut.

"Last one, Tony, please. Ready? Two." Gibbs counted again.

Tony looked reluctantly at his daddy and slowly opened his mouth as Gibbs slipped in the spoon. This mouthful, Gibbs noted, was taking Tony a lot longer to swallow, but finally it was down.

"A' gone." Tony said proudly.

"Yeah no more, all gone. Good job, grubby boy." Gibbs said as he gently wiped down the little face and removed the dirty shirt from the boy. In his usual manner Tony had made a mess and needed to be changed. As Gibbs lifted the shirt over the boy's head he noticed Tony had gone very still, his face took on a pale green tinge to it.

"Aww hell." Gibbs said, startled as Tony vomited up the small amount in his stomach all over himself and the bed, and then started to scream between his retches. The jerking motion caused by the vomiting had jolted his ribs, causing agony to rip through the small child.

Gibbs tried to calm Tony down, holding him close despite the mess, whispering soft words of comfort, rubbing his back soothingly and bouncing him up and down gently in his arms. Tears were streaming down Tony's face; the retching would not stop despite the poor boy expelling all of his stomach contents. He didn't understand the pain, and he didn't understand that moving around and screaming would not help.

Dr Morrissey had heard the commotion and dashed into the room, a young nurse following closely behind. The doctor took one look at the mess on the bed and immediately knew what had happened. She also noted that Tony, in his thrashing around, had pulled out his IV line, and in his state it was going to be difficult to put back in.

The decision was made; she was going to have to sedate the child to prevent him doing more damage to himself.

"Anna, if you please, could you quickly change the linen on the cot." The young nurse rapidly did as she was told.

"Mr. Gibbs," Dr Morrissey addressed him as calmly as she could, "we are going to have to sedate Tony for a little while." The darkened look she got from the man made her cringe inwardly - he was not impressed by the suggestion.

"I assure you it is necessary to sedate him so we can replace his line and give him something for his pain. Vomiting with cracked ribs is painful enough in an adult, let alone a small child. This is to help him, I promise."

The only response she received was a curt not.

"Okay, lie him down gently on the bed and try to hold him as still as possible if you could, Mr. Gibbs." The little boy was still struggling and screaming as his father placed him on the bed - he was kicking and thrashing around in agony, tears were pouring down his face.

"Shhh… it's okay sweetie, I'll make it all better. Anna could you help hold him down? Thank you." The doctor continued in her calm tone as she quickly prepped the injection site and syringe.

Gibbs watched in dismay as Tony continued to scream in pain. On the doctor's instructions he held Tony down as well as he could and watched as the young nurse did the same. Holding him down only made Tony worse. He was scared and in pain, and the look in those wild, tear-filled green eyes pierced Gibbs' soul and made him sick to his stomach.

Dr Morrissey finally administered the injection and after a few moments Tony's fight began to wane, his limbs becoming lax, pained eyes that were still looking into his started to droop, and as they closed Gibbs swore he saw betrayal flash through those green orbs.

The remainder of the treatment was quite uneventful. Dr Morrissey worked quickly to re-insert the IV line and splint it again, starting up the pain medication at a slightly higher dose. She also placed an oxygen mask over the little face, and turned on the monitors for his vitals. Looking at the little boy she smiled softly - he truly was a brave little kid. Her eyes glanced over to where his father was sitting. The man looked worn out, and she could see the guilt in his eyes.

"It wasn't your fault, Mr. Gibbs, it was just a little too much food - and mixed with the medication his little stomach couldn't handle it. He'll be fine, I've given him enough medication so he will sleep peacefully for the next couple of hours and when he wakes he will be just as happy as he ever was, I promise."

Again Gibbs just nodded his reply as he watched over his son.

*****************************

When Ducky arrived 2 hours after the incident, he was shocked to see Jethro sitting motionless beside Tony's bed. It wasn't the fact that he was sitting there that was troublesome, (As Dr Morrissey had filled him in on the events of the day) it was more to do with the expression on Jethro's face and the fact he hadn't changed his clothes that were still covered with mess. As Ducky silently took his seat opposite his friend, Gibbs' eyes met his and the elderly M.E was shocked at the amount of self-loathing in the icy blue eyes.

"Can you watch over him for me, Duck? I'm going home quickly to sort out some things." Gibbs spoke softly, his voice not betraying his emotions.

"Of course, Jethro." Ducky watched as his old friend stood and silently walked out the door.

"Oh dear, Anthony."

*******************************

As Gibbs drove he found himself lost in thought, the guilt of the past week he had barely kept at bay crashed over him and echoed in his mind.

He had let his son down again; he had hurt him and NO child ever deserved that. Firstly he had completely forgotten Tony had existed - that had caused the poor little boy to go through days and nights of desperation at missing his daddy, and then when Tony had eventually seen him again, he had been frightened by the gruffness and anger he saw emitting from the person he loved and trusted the most in his whole world. To top that incident off he had walked past the crying child, not even noticing he was there.

When Tony had rejected him after the car accident it tore up at his soul, but he couldn't say he didn't deserve that reaction - he did - and just as things were getting back to normal he had to go and stuff it up again. Tony didn't want to eat any more, but no - he had forced him, he should have known it was too much, he should have known when Tony had refused to eat anymore. And Tony, like a good boy, did exactly what his daddy had asked and ate those two more - stupid goddam �“ mouthfuls.

The result? More pain and suffering for Tony.

Gibbs would never forget the fear and suffering in Tony's eyes as he was held down.

Arriving at home Gibbs thought hard. He really was a useless bastard. He couldn't protect Shannon and Kelly, and he sure couldn't protect Tony - in fact he just seemed to hurt the little boy more. As he walked into the house Gibbs gave an almighty roar punching the wall hard, letting out all his frustrations and putting a fist-sized hole in the plaster.

Something had to be done, Tony deserved better, better than a broken down Ex-Special Agent, Ex-marine who was too haunted by his own demons, and consumed by his own guilt to get his head out of his ass and realize what was truly important. He kept hurting his son and he couldn't let it continue. He had made up his mind. For Tony's own good - he was leaving. Suitcase packed, ticket in hand - he was off to Mexico.

*****************************

Gibbs was relieved to find Tony's hospital room empty - Ducky must have hit the head - he thought - thankfully. Saying goodbye to Tony was going to be hard enough without dealing with the elderly M.E trying to get him to stay, the reproachful looks he would get as he stated his reasons and the disapproval clearly written on his face as he said farewell. This was the reason he hadn't mentioned his departure to anyone, it would be better if he was just gone.

Standing by Tony's bedside, he watched the boy sleeping; oxygen mask still on. He had been going to say something, say goodbye but the words escaped him. A shadow of doubt settled over his heart. Was he doing the right thing? And was it really the right thing for Tony? Bending down, Gibbs placed a loving kiss on Tony's cheek,

"I'm sorry," He whispered. "I love you, Tony." As he walked out of the room and out of Tony's life for the last time, he heard the words that made his heart stop. They were muffled by both sleep and the oxygen mask, but they still held so much significance.

"Wuv-oo Da-dee."

***************************************

Ok so.... There is chapter 11.... Let me know what you think?? I love feedback and helps me to make the story better for you all! What did you think of the beginning of the chapter, did I make you think Tony had died, I know evil *sorry*, but I love to evoke peoples emotions when I write...

Continuation of the Hiatus period ......

******************************

It was hot - no; hot was an understatement - it was scorching. The Mexican sun beat down without mercy as Gibbs wiped his sweaty brow. He was seriously regretting his offer to fix Mike's roof now, but, Gibbs being Gibbs, he could not leave the job half done and had worked his way through the day.

Packing away the tools, Gibbs longed for a cool beer and some time to sit and relax. That's what he liked about Mike's place - it was secluded, quiet and gave space and time to think things through. Mike didn't push; he was never one for 'feelings' and he didn't need things explained to him either. Mike had seen first hand everything his 'probie' had been through after Shannon and Kelly had been killed. And now here he was a second time. After the explosion, the subsequent memory loss and the events that came after there was a lot for Gibbs to mull over. Mike had afforded him that time, the normality and the peace and quiet he needed….

"Hey, Probie," Mike's gravely gruff voice yelled out from where he was standing on the deck. "Your boy's awake!"

Peace and quiet… Then again maybe not.

Gibbs looked to the deck of the house where Mike was now crouched next to Tony, talking to him and pointing over to where Gibbs was standing. Tony smiled before yelling as loud as he could…

"Hiya, Poh-bie!" Tony's little voice parroted the older man's. Mike laughed and handed the ice-cream he was holding over to Tony. After months of Mike trying to get Tony to call him 'Probie' he had finally resorted to bribery, which, true to Tony's form, had worked. Gibbs shook his head and glared daggers over at Mike, for as cute as it was Tony saying 'Poh-bie', Gibbs wasn't ready to give up the 'daddy' tag just yet. Mike gave Tony a soft pat on the backside, sending him Gibbs's way and looked smug - after four months he had completed his mission.

Four months. Gibbs couldn't believe it had been that long. It had been a little under four months since he had last stepped foot into NCIS, four months since he had stormed out again, four months since Tony's accident, and four months since those three words 'Love you daddy' or in Tony's case 'Wuv-oo Da-dee', had stopped him from making the biggest mistake of his life. Yes he had still gone to Mexico and spent months sitting on Mikes deck drinking 'hooch', the difference was he had taken his son with him and the 'hooch' drinking had been done in the evening when Tony was tucked up safely in bed.

Now, as he watched Tony toddle clumsily across the too soft sand, trying to keep the melting ice-cream from falling out of the cone with a little hand, he was once again reminded he had made the right decision. Raising Tony was the one thing he could not, would not fail at. He loved the kid too damn much.

"Da-dee," Tony looked up at Gibbs with a huge grin, ice-cream covering his face, running down his arms and over his bare little tummy in a sticky mess. "I-team"

"Yeah I can see that, Tony," Gibbs chuckled; he really wasn't sure how much Tony was actually eating considering how much was covering the boy. "Is it good?" He ruffled Tony's sweaty hair as he continued to pack away the tools.

"Yeah!" Tony nodded enthusiastically as he licked the ice-cream, again making happy 'Mmmm' sounds as he followed his daddy like a shadow. Gibbs smiled to himself as he packed away the last item, listening to Tony babble, before scooping him up and taking him down towards the water.

Kelly had always loved the beach, the sun, the sand, the way the ocean spray softly misted and the calming breeze that whipped and blew stray strands of hair around her delicate face. Gibbs remembered with aching fondness the last family vacation they had been on. Riding horses on the water's edge, sunset slowly tingeing everything in shades of gold as they breathed in the last of the long day, Kelly's cries of 'Go faster… Can we go faster Dad?', and Shannon's laughter scolding him for encouraging Kelly's pleas, her happy glow shadowing even that of the setting sun. Gibbs also remembered in shocking contrast to that wonderful memory, the last time he had been sitting on a beach, world in monotone gray, wracked with guilt, despair and grief as he held the heavy weight of the pistol in his hand….

But now he had a chance to make new fond memories.

Gibbs held Tony's little arms and jumped him over the tiny waves as they rolled in, again and again he swung his little boy high just before the water reached him, then landing him gently on the sandy shore. Tony laughed with glee, the delightful sound carrying in the soft warm breeze. Gibbs stopped as his arms got tired; crouching down next to his son, Tony latched himself onto his daddy's leg, his eyes sparkling with happiness and mischief.

"Waw-wa mine foots," Tony managed to get out between his giggles and delighted squeals as the waves lapped over his little toes. "Mine foots da-dee!" Gibbs couldn't help but laugh; despite the fact they did this every afternoon Tony was still so excited and filled with awe. Gibbs snaked an arm around the little boy and pulled him close to his chest, giving him a kiss on top of his head and quickly removed the little boy's diaper - Gibbs knew what was coming; sand, water and diapers didn't mix, especially when Tony had the propensity to fill his with the wet sand and end up with diaper chaffing â€" a lesson they learned the first day of arriving in Mexico.

"Uh-oh." Tony giggled as he flopped onto his bare bottom into the water and splashed about with glee.

"Gottcha." Gibbs splashed his son playfully with a handful of water.

Tony laughed and splashed his own wet hands at his daddy. "Go-ya!" The little boy repeated and continued to giggle, his big green eyes glowing. Tony was having an absolute blast sitting in the water splashing about, putting the wet sand on his head and throwing it at his daddy, (whose own shorts and shirt were soaked and sand covered) running up and down the beach being 'chased' and generally just enjoying the time spent with his daddy.

The duo played and laughed until Mike gruffly called out from the house - something about being starving and putting on the grill. Gibbs took Tony's little hand in his as they made their way slowly back to the house, the setting sun starting to cast its shadows as the last ray's of the day glinted off the waves. The perfect ending to another perfect day.

*****************************************

"Apobuse," Tony grabbed Mike's leg tugging on his pants. "Apobuse, peeese." This was the fifth time the little boy had asked and he was getting more and more insistent, his voice rising higher at Mike's confusion.

"Probie, what's your boy talking about?" Mike called out from the kitchen. "He keeps asking for 'apobuse.' What the hell is apobuse?"

"Apple Juice." Gibbs's voice echoed from the next room.

"I already gave him apple juice. Even put it in that damn blue sippy-cup thing."

"APOBUSE!" Tony had all but given up and was now yelling at Mike, pointing to the counter top and trying to drag him over towards it. "PEEESE"

Gibbs came through the doorway. "What do you want, Tony?"

Tony stopped yelling at Mike, let go of his pants and ran over to his daddy. "Apobuse, peeese!" The little boy looked up at him, big eyes shining with tears of frustration, as no-one understood what he was trying to get across.

"You already have apple juice, see?" Gibbs handed over the blue sippy-cup.

"No," Tony pushed the cup back into his daddy's hands. "Dat apobuse." Again he pointed over to the counter.

Gibbs looked at where his son was pointing; laughter escaping when he realized what it was Tony was after. "No, Tony, you can't have that. That's not apple juice."

"No apobuse?"

"No, this is yours." Gibbs handed the sippy-cup back to Tony and caught the confused look on Mikes face. "He wants your beer."

Mike gave a loud bark of laughter. "A boy after my own heart. At least now I have a new word to teach him. Beer."

"Quit corrupting my son, will ya?"

"Hey, s'not my fault you're here, never said I'd be a good influence on your kid."

"Just say the word and we'll be gone."

"Don't tempt me, Jethro, I ain't nearly drunk enough." the words were delivered in jest, both men enjoying the familiar banter as they walked out onto the deck, Tony toddling behind with an armful of cars, his 'apobuse' and dragging Mike's giant sombrero behind him.

The day was once again hot, the two men cooling off with a beer while they watched Tony play happily with his cars, wearing nothing but a diaper and the giant sombrero, which was much too big for his little head and kept falling over his eyes. They hadn't been outside for long when Camilla arrived with the groceries.

"Hola, gentlemen."

"Gentlemen? She can't be talking to you and me, can she, Gunny?" Mike stood and took the groceries out of her hands.

"Si, not you no. But this little man here." Camilla picked Tony up and gave him a kiss, "Mi corazoncito." she addressed the little boy.

"Hey! What about us?" Mike asked in false affront.

"Don't listen to him, Camilla, Mike's jealous of Tony's ability to attract the women." Gibbs grinned at Mikes scowl. "How much do we owe you?"

"Twenty-five American. And you have a phone call."

Mike went to take the phone, but Camilla shook her head and handed Tony back over to Gibbs. "Not you... Leroy Jethro."

*****************************************************

Ziva's phone call was unexpected, even more unexpected perhaps, had been the reason for the phone call.

"I'm currently on the run from the FBI, NCIS, Mossad and my father."

Well, that startling revelation was not what he had expected to hear, positioning Tony more securely on his hip, his interest peaked, trying to keep the incredulous tone out of his voice as he walked around the deck to a more private position. "Geez, what did you do?"

"I did nothing, Gibbs, I swear, I did nothing."

Gibbs was struggling to hear Ziva over Tony, who was vehemently trying to talk to whoever it was his daddy was speaking to on the phone.

"Where's Balboa?"

"He can't help me."

"Well you should talk to Jenny. Jenny can help you." Gibbs really didn't like where this conversation was leading.

"I can't…"

"Ziva, look, I'm retired. I'm 3,000 miles away. What do you think I can do, that they can't do?"

Ziva's voice held more vulnerability than Gibbs had ever imagined it could, she sounded like a frightened child, her voice cracking as she answered. "Honestly, I do not know. I was hoping, maybe… save me."

****************************************************************************

And that was how, after four months on his 'Margarita safari' â€" a term which he had silenced with a glare â€" he found himself back in D.C. Ziva had indeed been 'saved', an international disaster averted, and now Gibbs faced his own set of challenges - should he stay in D.C or return to Mexico? In the back of his mind, Gibbs had always thought he would return to D.C, it was the when that had remained the mystery, and now that he was indeed back â€" be it not by choice - was he ready to stay.

In his months away, Gibbs had gone through a cacophony of emotions brought on by the explosion, memory loss, the raw grief of reliving his loss of Shannon and Kelly, and his own perceived failure regarding Tony and things were just starting to work themselves out. Tony had recovered well from his injuries; all physical traces of the fateful day were gone, the sea air and sun was doing wonders for the little boy. They had a routine, Tony had a routine, things were settled, and Gibbs himself was thoroughly enjoying being able to spend his days watching his son grow. Being able to be there for every new word and new ability, every scraped knee and teary eye, every hug and every new experience, things he had missed with Kelly. On the other hand Tony needed his family; sure they could visit but it really wasn't the same…..

Unknown to the team, Gibbs watched contently down from the catwalk outside MTAC as they played happily with Tony. It was great to see his son interacting with the team so naturally again. Before leaving for Mexico things were strained, Tony had been unwell; still recovering from the accident and the emotional ramifications. He had been unsettled, in pain, cranky, uncooperative and trying to get an active almost 2 year old to understand he couldn't run and jump around was impossible. Those first two weeks had been nightmarish to say the least; it had tested everyone's patience, strained relationships and tugged at the heartstrings of all involved. And then Gibbs had left, bundled Tony up and headed to Mexico with out a word to anyone, adding further strain to fragile bonds.

Now watching Tony play, Gibbs could pretend everything was all right… well, almost….

The little boy had McGee's phone â€" much to the agent's dismay - and Ziva was pretending to make it ring. Tony held it upside down half way between his ear and his mouth and 'answered' it with a yelled, "Yeah!" Before babbling at an amazing pace in what seemed to be an angry tone, the word 'NO' being used a lot.

Ziva laughed at Tony's conversation and the little boy silenced her with a Gibbs-worthy glare, which made Kate and McGee crack up. Tony, for his part finished his phone 'conversation' and put the phone down with a 'thump'.

"Well," Kate said with a chuckle. "It's not hard to guess whose son he is."

"Was it the 'yeah' instead of 'hello', the tone of voice, the glare, or the fact Tony hung up without a 'goodbye' that gave it away?" McGee added as he went to retrieve the phone before Tony could throw it across the bullpen.

"The coconut didn't fall off the tree, yes?"

"It's 'apple', Ziva, and it's 'fall far' from the tree."

"Either way, McGee, Gibbs is…."

"Gibbs is what, Ziva?" The ex-marine, now ex-special agent, gruffly interrupted and scooped up Tony from the floor.

"Ahh, Boss… I mean, Gibbs, we were just talking abo…"

"I'll be down in Abby's lab." like a hurricane, Gibbs tore into the bullpen and left again.

"Bye-bye, Poh-bies." Tony grinned brightly and waved his little hand, leaving the agents staring at each other small smiles playing on their lips.

**************************************

The music was blaring; reverberating right through the closed doors to her lab. It was loud, angry sounding metal, which to him sounded a lot like Tony when he was banging on the pots and pans in the kitchen yelling various things at the top of his lungs. How anyone could call it music he had no idea, but Abby was enjoying it, he watched through the glass window as her black pigtails bobbed up and down whilst she was running some kind of test. Her monitors were all still adorned with various pictures of himself and Tony, and he was pretty sure that they would remain that way until he returned for good… if he returned.

He knew his leaving had hurt his team, the way he had just up and left without so much as a goodbye, and he knew it wasn't just his leaving, but the fact that he had taken Tony away from them, which had cut deep. He had e-mailed them all once a month (an amazing feat), to fill them in on Tony, and the team â€" with the exception of Dr Mallard, whom he would deal with later â€" had seemed fine with his unexpected return and had almost forgiven him for his departure. Although Gibbs had seen everyone including Abby, Tony was being looked after by Dr Mallard whilst the team was busy saving Ziva, so this was the first time the excitable goth would see the little boy. Gibbs steeled himself for the onslaught he knew was coming when the doors opened. Not surprisingly, Abby continued obliviously on her task and didn't even hear him enter the room. Walking over to the stereo system he switched it off, the silence that filled the room was almost more deafening that the 'music' itself. Abby stood still, not making any move to face him.

"Uhh-oh moo-sic gone!" Gibbs looked down and smiled at his son whom had his small hands covering his ears and was pulling a face.

At the sound of Tony's voice, Abby turned around, smile splitting her face before she launched herself at the pair hugging them tightly.

"Tony, Tony, Tony, Tony… I missed you!" Abby grabbed the bemused looking little boy and twirled him into the air.

"Abbs, don't spin him too much."

Abby looked sheepish and put Tony back on floor. The little boy wobbled a little, grabbing his daddy's leg for stability.

"Does this mean you're back, Gibbs, back for good?" Abby looked at him with big sad eyes. Gibbs didn't have a chance to answer; he couldn't answer because he didn't know himself. Abby scooped Tony off the floor and cuddled him softly, enjoying having him back in her arms finally after all these months.

"Because we're not just team, Gibbs, we're family, and family are supposed to stick together."

"Abbs…"

"No, Gibbs, I don't want to hear it… I… you… we were family, we were family and you broke it, you broke us. You didn't even say goodbye. The team hasn't been the same and Ducky, well you've seen him, and we all saw the tension between you both, it's hinky, Gibbs, not cool." Abby handed Tony back over to his daddy and gave him a kiss on the forehead, with tears in her eyes she spoke again. "You need to decide what you want, Gibbs, we miss you, we need you, and I think you need us too. Tony needs us; think of him. You need to fix this, to fix our family."

With that, Abby turned back around, switched her music back on and continued running tests. Gibbs was dumbfounded; normally he was silent because he just wasn't talkative, it wasn't usually because he couldn't think of anything to say but that was exactly how it was now.

*********************************************

Returning to the Bullpen, Gibbs sat at Balboa's empty desk while he quickly signed off on his portion of the investigation, stealing the occasional glance at Tony, who was struggling to stay awake. He was getting cranky, restless, whining and snuffling; the little boy was overtired, he'd had a huge day and was ready to crash.

Ziva was trying to keep the exhausted child from bursting into tears as he stood â€" having refused to be picked up or cuddled by anyone - clinging to her leg, resting his head on her thigh, and sniffing miserably. Ziva tried the only other thing that might cheer Tony up - opening her desk draw she took out a small cookie and handed it over.

"Peeese-fanks." Tony said softly, running his words together and stuffing the offered cookie in his mouth. Finishing his mouthful, Tony rubbed his eyes tiredly, grabbed his pacifier (a habit which Gibbs was having trouble breaking) from the desk, lay down on the floor with a soft sigh and closed his eyes, keeping one little hand on Ziva's foot.

"Spoiling my boy, Ziva?" Gibbs asked as he signed the last of the paperwork, his voice softer and with more humor than he usually held for work; then again this technically wasn't his work anymore. Before Ziva could answer she was interrupted by a familiar brogue.

"Well, Gibbs, Tony has indeedbeen absent from all our lives for the last four months…" Ducky left the sentence hanging as he strolled into the Bullpen, and no one could ignore the bitterness in his usually jovial voice, or the absence of the use of Gibbs's first name. Ducky was not happy, and the team had not failed in picking up the tension and unease between the two - even before Gibbs had returned the team knew Ducky had not been impressed with Gibbs's unannounced departure.

"Thank you for pointing that out, Dr Mallard," blue eyes met steely grey. "Come on, Tony, let's go." Gibbs scooped up Tony, who had woken amidst the raised voices and held his son softly, the little head resting tiredly on his daddy's shoulder.

"That's right, leave. Abandon your family, take Anthony, take my grandson away again. Go ahead. Quit."

Gibbs didn't reply to Ducky's unusual outburst, instead he spun on his heel and stalked towards the elevator. Tony looked back at his 'pa' and waved his little hand wearily.

Riding the elevator down, Tony snuggled further into his daddy's chest, his breaths evening out, peaceful in sleep. A complete opposite to the way Gibbs was feeling. He was wired, and he was angry and ashamed at himself. Gibbs knew he deserved Ducky's dressing down, it had been a long time coming really, and the words had hurt, but sometimes the truth did.

The brutal honesty, anger, and desolation he saw in his friend's eyes struck a chord in his heart, he knew what he needed to do now, he had made his decision. The first step in repairing the damage, the first step in mending the shattered bonds between himself and his oldest friend - talk to Director Sheppard.

*********************************
AN: So Im not so happy with chapter it isn't quite right, but it was written while I was heavily medicated so yeah.....
I have written 14 chapters for this story so far (some of which are posted on other sites already) I am hoping to upload the rest of the chapters so all the sites are at the same spot and also hoping to have chapter 15 written and posted by next week - So there is a lot of baby Tony coming in the next few days! Enjoy and let me know what you think!

"Wynken, Blynken and Nod one night, sailed off in a wooden shoe. Sailed on a river of crystal light, into a sea of dew..."

"Soose," Tony's voice, muffled by his pacifier piped up from where his head was softly pillowed in his pa's lap. A little hand snaking out from beneath the covers and slapping down on the page of the storybook pointing to the wooden shoe sailing boat "Bi soose."

"That's quite right my dear boy, you are clever. A big shoe boat."

"Da-dee?"

A soft chuckle drifted through the room "Yes Anthony, a boat just like daddy. Now shhhh," the elderly M.E placed a finger gently to the little boys lips "you need to go to sleep." Tony nodded a sleepy head snuggling back into his pa, little fingers gripping the cuff of the older mans shirt to keep him close.

"Where are you going, and what do you wish? The old moon asked the three. We've come to fish for the herring fish, that live in this beautiful sea;"

Unbeknown to the pair, Gibbs silently watched from the doorway, as the Scottish brogue continued the tale and lulled his baby boy into slumber. The soft illumination from Tony's night-light added to the soothing ambiance of the room, a stark difference to the vibe of animosity that had flowed between the two older gentlemen and throughout the house earlier in the evening.

Gibbs had officially been back at NCIS for a week, and it had been decided that the team - their dysfunctional family - would celebrate Tony's rather belated 2nd birthday together in hopes that it would repair and strengthen the bonds of its members, which had been damaged after Gibbs and Tony's abrupt departure to Mexico. In particular, the bonds between two members, Agent Gibbs and Dr Mallard - the two still using the formal titles as form of address, much to the exasperation of the rest of the team. The tension between both Gibbs and Dr Mallard had escalated over the week, fueled by snarking jests and a stubbornness that prevented either man from backing down. It hadn't helped that the week had started with a high profile case that had set everyone's nerves on high alert, and that neither man had had time to sit and really talk things through. It was hoped by all, that the spirit of the night and celebration would help to pave the way and fix the cracks in the relationship, but alas it was not to be. It had started with a quiet disagreement between the two men over the amount of cake consumed by one, chocolate-coated toddler, who had somehow gotten to the cake without anyone noticing and practically eaten his way into a sugar coma. Escalating and ending with loud yelling between Gibbs and the good Dr, Tony throwing a tantrum, Gibbs loosing his patience, a sobbing two year old who'd expelled his over indulgence on the rug in the lounge room and Abby, Tim, Kate and Ziva leaving quickly to let the men sort out their mess.

"Nets of silver and gold have we! Said Wynken, Blynken and Nod."

****************************-Flashback-*************************

"Once upon a time there was...."

"A princess daddy, there has to be a princess."

"Ok. Once upon-a time there was a princess, who lived in a castle..."

"Nooo daddy," Kelly giggled from where she was nestled between her parents in the large bed "she lives in the forest. The princess can't live in the castle until the prince comes."

"Alright, alright." Jethro lifted his palms in surrender, " Once a-pon-a time, there was a princess who lived all alone in the forest, awaiting her...."

"Prince charming." Shannon interrupted, rolling onto her side on the comfortable bed to face her husband, eyes sparking with mirth as she smiled at Kelly and ran a hand down Jethro's arm.

"Not helping Shan.... Who's telling this story anyway, huh."

"If your gunna tell the story dad, you have to do it right."

"Is that so.."

"Yep... And you reeeeeally need help."

"Well you know what, " Jethro wrapped an arm around his little girl and began to tickle her mercilessly "I think you are the one needing help Kell."

"Mummy! Help me pleeease!" Kelly's laughter continued, the bedclothes getting strewn about as Shannon and Jethro attacked the girl with kisses and tickles. It was going to be a long night.

**********************-End Flashback -********************************

Gibbs memory had returned and, for the most part was correct. However it was now the flashbacks and dreams that plagued his thoughts. After the explosion these episodes were hauntingly frequent and even more vivid and recurrent when back in the home where so many memories had been made. The feelings his messed up psyche evoked were as if only days had past instead of years. That was part of the reason for his sudden departure to Mexico. He couldn't stay in the house any longer. Maybe it had been a mistake not to tell anyone he was leaving, a mistake not to say goodbye, a misjudgment on his part but it had been his decision in the end, and he had, in his scrambled mind managed to justify it until now.... Now people were suffering, Tony was suffering and he had to make it right.

"Wynken and Blynken are two little eyes, and Nod is a little head, and the wooden shoe that sailed the skies is a wee ones trundle bed. So shut your eyes while papa sings of wonderful sites that be, and you shall see the beautiful things as you rock in the misty sea, where the old shoe rocked the fishermen three, Wynken, Blynken and Nod." Dr Mallardfinished the story and looked down to his lap where his sleeping grandson lay, extracting himself slowly from under the sleeping child he gently lay the little head back on the pillow placing a soft kiss on his forehead before standing and making his way toward the doorway.

"He ok?" Gibbs shot a concerned look towards Tony's small form.

"Just fine. I imagine his system needed to expel all the excess sugar, not to mention his excitement with his tantrum wouldn't have helped the matter... How did the clean up go?"

"Ok. Floor is finally clean, but the rug will have another nice mark."

The discomfort between the two men was clearly showing in their brusque conversation, both pausing for a moment letting their gazes fall to Tony before looking back at each other. There was an awkward silence settling between them, neither wanting to get into another argument but both knowing the air needed to be cleared, both of them ashamed at their behavior over the course of the evening and indeed over the past week. Gibbs eyes narrowed at the calculating look being given to him by the shorter man.

"If you've got something to say Dr, just say it."

"Oh yes Agent Gibbs," Dr Mallard answered acerbically "because you listened so well to my previous counsel."

************************-Flashback-**************************

"Wuv-oo Da-dee"

The words were muffled by sleep and painkillers, but Gibbs still heard them cutting him to the very core and stripping his defenses as he left the hospital room and headed for his car. Drawing in a deep breath of fresh air he stepped outside into the parking lot. He did not know what to do, those sweet words ran through his mind 'wuv-oo da-dee' over and over, it was hard to believe that those words, said with such honesty, innocence and love could cause such a pain. He was frustrated, angry with himself and guilty - so very guilty. Unlocking his car he stopped abruptly when he heard a familiar voice.

"Where are you going Jethro?"

Gibbs paused but did not answer; his old friend took in the packed suitcases in the back seat, and frowned.

"I once knew a man, whom found himself in a awkward situation, caught up with some undesirable associates, owed money to the wrong people. It wasn't much a few hundred dollars, or was it a few thousand, no it was ..."

"Ahh Geez Duck... Is there a point to this?"

"He neglected to tell any of his family or friends his troubles and decided instead to put as much distance as he could between himself and everyone else..."

"Let me guess he felt guilty and regretted it for the rest of his life." Gibbs quipped in return.

"Actually no, he was killed over it. Although I imagine he would of regretted that very much... The point being, if he had of told his family and friends, perhaps they could of helped." Ducky took in his friends stony façade, unmoving, unchanging and tried again to reach him. "Look Jethro, I understand...."

"Understand!" Gibbs gave a bitter laugh. "No you can't understand... You have no idea what its like... I let him down I couldn't protect Tony.." - Or Shannon and Kelly. Even though un-vocalized the elderly M.E understood that sentiment loud and clear.

"Jethro, there is nothing you could have done for Tony." It was on the tip of his tongue to mention Gibbs girls but remembering the quote 'discretion is the better part of valor' he decided to let it be. "You were in an explosion... Not your fault. You lost your memory...Not your fault... You were not the one driving the car that hit young Anthony, nor were you the one whom put him in the car and left him there to begin with, the blame for that lies on my shoulders I'm afraid. Nobody blames you." Ducky's gray blue eyes held the gaze of steely blue. "However if you abandon that precious child in there," gesturing towards the hospital, his tone sharp and surprisingly threatening "we will. If you leave him we will 'close ranks' as they say, faster Jethro, than you can quote your rule 6. We will all do what is necessary to protect Tony, even from you. " Finally seeing a crack in Gibbs amour Ducky pressed on softening his tone.

"You have been blessed with a second chance, a second chance at love and family not just with Anthony, but with all of us, Abigail, Timothy, Kate, Ziva and I, we are family. Let us in, let us help. Not many people are fortunate enough to get a second chance and one has been given to you, do not throw that away. Do not abandon him nor us." Ducky watched the emotions play in his friend's eyes, his face gave away nothing, he did not speak but his eyes spoke volumes.

"Now, I am going back inside, Anthony should be waking up soon and I do not wish him to be alone. Take a moment; get yourself a coffee and make your decision, remember you will only get one. If you leave, you will say Goodbye, do not do me or Anthony the disrespect of leaving without that."

Turning around, not giving Gibbs a chance to speak, Ducky headed back inside leaving Gibbs standing in silence by his car.

5 minutes later Gibbs returned to Tony's hospital room and sat down in the chair nearest his son, giving Ducky a nod of the head and a small smile as the elderly M.E placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

***********************-END FLASHBACK-*****************************

"I listened to your 'counsel' Dr Mallard, I came back, I didn't abandon Tony..."

"No, but you abandoned the rest of us. No warning nothing, I was here the night before you left, before you took Anthony away, you didn't so much as mention you were leaving, not even a goodbye.... "

The two men's words were spoken at a whisper so not to disturb Tony's sleep, but the disappointment in the words was practically yelled. The hurt in the older mans expression was palpable, striking a cord with the gruff special agent, the walls Gibbs had kept tightly in place, walls that over the last few months he had reinforced, crumpled, and with a sigh Gibbs spoke.

"Wanna know why I left, why the suddenness... " There was such sincere despair and bone dead weariness in Gibbs eyes as he spoke, Dr Mallard couldn't look away. "Flashbacks and dreams. Made no difference if I was awake or asleep, day after day, night after night, they were so sudden, so real... Not only could I see and hear them as though they were right here with me, but I could damn well feel them, touch them, hell even smell them. It was worse here, at home." Gibbs eyes flashed, his voice although still whispered had gained volume slightly, enough to portray the emotion he was feeling. "But you know what did it, that last night before we left. I woke up, middle of the night. I could hear Kelly crying... Hear her calling out for me... And I searched for her; I actually looked all over the house trying to find her. The cry's were so real, I spent twenty god-damn minutes looking for her before I realized..." Gibbs voice caught in his throat, thick with emotion, and self-loathing. "I finally realized it wasn't Kelly crying, it was Tony, poor little kid had worked himself into such a state by the time I realized...."

Dr Mallard opened his mouth to say something, but for once, couldn't find the words, shocked at the startling revelation.

"That's why I left, I couldn't stay here any longer it was making things worse and I had to lookout for Tony, had to get away, clear my mind, get a grip. Mexico helped; the visions weren't so common, still there but only in my dreams..." Gibbs chuffed a bitter laugh as he added, "Makes sleeping at night hell..." Gibbs finished speaking the soft weary tone fading into nothingness, as he saw the same pain and sorrow he was feeling reflected in his old friends face.

Minutes passed before Ducky regained his voice, "Oh Jethro. I'm so very sor.."

"You know how I feel about apologies Duck."

"Sign of weakness."

"Not between friends...or family..." Gibbs grabbed Ducky in a tight hug. "I'm sorry Duck. I should have told you."

"Apology accepted Jethro, my dear, dear friend. And I to am sorry, so very sorry." The older man returned the hug and both men stood there for a few moments, eyes drifting towards where Tony snuffled in his sleep, wriggling for a moment before settling back down.

"Well, it's getting late, I should be on my way."

"Guestroom's free Duck. Clean sheets even a new mattress and comforter." Gibbs continued at Ducky's questioning look, "Apparently Tony was using the guest bed to hide food, or, what I hope used to be food. Four months, soggy rotting food and a bed... Well you can guess." Gibbs shrugged a shoulder and gave the shorter man a small smirk.

With another glance towards Tony, Ducky accepted the invitation, and bid his friend a goodnight before retiring.

Leaving the bathroom light on, turning off Tony's night-light and giving the still sleeping child a soft kiss Gibbs also turned in.

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Abby and McGee were sitting on Gibbs sofa, slight déjà vu from the previous night with one notable difference Dr Mallard and Agent Gibbs were back to being just Jethro and Ducky - thankfully - things were finally right between everyone, and the nights pizza evening was Gibbs 'non-apology'. Now the only argument pertaining was a friendly disagreement between the happiest goth in the world, and the young agent.

"Tony, who do you love more, me or McGee?"

"Abbs you can't ask him that, he wont understand!"

Tony looked up with a dimpled smile from where he was cramming as many cars, and various other things as he could into one of Gibbs own boots.

"You know he won't pick you Timmy, your afraid you'll lose... " The hyperactive goth turned her attention back to the little boy. "Will you Tony, you love Abby more don't you?"

"No."

McGee laughed and grinned in triumph "Take that Abbs. Knew you loved me more Tony."

"No."

"What do you mean no? Its either me, wonderful Abby who gives the best hugs in the world..." Abby's voice was full of enthusiasm as she tried to get Tony to choose her.... "Or McGee" her vioce deadpan.

"Wuv da-dee."

The headslap that was delivered to both Abby and McGee as Gibbs strolled into the room stunned the two into silence.

"Atta boy Tony." Gibbs picked up his son round the middle tucking him under an arm. "You two. Quit while your behind." Depositing Tony in his highchair he ruffled the boys hair and rolled up the large sleeves of his own, old, well worn, USMC t-shirt that had been placed on Tony for the purpose of covering the little boy's clothes in lieu of the pizza demolition that was about to begin.

"Pizza's here, Kate and Ziva are bringing it in now." Gibbs called out as he left the room to wash up before dinner.

As Abby stood, she slogged McGee in the arm before ducking out of the way laughing; McGee retaliated by pulling her pigtail while on the way to his chair.

"Just think Ziva, when we left there was only one two year old...." Kate teased as she placed the pizza boxes on the table, laughter from both Kate and Ziva intermingled with the sounds of Ducky's conversation with Tony.

"Shut up Kate." McGee tried to sound offended, failing dismally to mask the humor clearly evident in his tone. Abby stuck out her tongue in Kate's direction.

"Shup-up" Tony parroted, Abby gave a snort of laughter before the room fell deadly silent, as the rest of the group looked at Tony, mouths agape.

"Don't laugh Abby, you'll make him worse.."

"Shup-up" Tony smiled and clapped his hands, looking so very proud.

"No Anthony," Ducky admonished from across the table "you mustn't use that language, that is a naughty word."

Tony just looked confused and opened his mouth again "Shu..." Ziva gently put a hand over the little boy's mouth muffling the words as Tony giggled.

"McGee, you must make him stop. Gibbs will shoot you, if he finds out."

"Finds out what?" Gibbs again used his impeccable timing to catch the tail-end of the conversation. Ziva quickly removed her hand from Tony's mouth and took her seat at the table.

"Uhh, Umm, well you see boss...."

"McGee was just saying he was going to give Tony the biggest piece of pizza with the most sauce." Abby interrupted and gave her most charming smile; Gibbs didn't believe them for a moment and raised his eyebrow in question.

"Well McGee, when he makes a mess with that 'big, saucy' piece of pizza," Gibbs tone implied he knew they were lying "you can clean him up."

Gibbs took his seat next to Tony grabbing a piece of pizza and cutting into bite-sized pieces for the little boy as everyone else grabbed their own piece. Once everyone was settled Ducky stood;

"I propose a toast," the group grabbed the there various glasses and bottles raising them in readiness "to borrow the words of Johann Schiller, 'It is not flesh and blood, but the heart which makes us fathers and sons' - To Family.."

"To family..." The resounding sound of clinking glass could be heard, amongst the laughter and conversations that were already starting up.

Tony copied the movements wanting to 'clink' glasses with everyone, something Gibbs put an end to very quickly when Tony got overenthusiastic and bashed his sippy-cup a little too hard against Ziva's glass spilling it on the table.

Tony grinned mischievously at the glare his daddy was giving him and took a big drink out of his sippy-cup, giving an exaggerated "Ahhh" as he finished, before looking at his daddy again cheekily from beneath little eyelashes and stuffing a piece of pizza in his mouth with a smile. Gibbs couldn't help the smile that came to his own face as he watched Tony's antics, a warm feeling - that had nothing to do with the beer in his hand - spread over Gibbs as he settled to eat his own pizza and bask in the familial glow of the evening.

The dinner was going nicely, conversation and banter flowed smoothly between the 'family' members interrupted only by Tony's "Ahh's" punctuated after every drink he took, the normally chatty little boy too occupied with his favorite food to use his mouth for anything other than cramming pizza into. Tony was well onto his second piece of pizza having devoured the first with gusto, this piece Tony seemed not to like as much pulling off the pineapple and dropping it onto the floor, the action going unnoticed for a few minutes before Gibbs caught what he was doing. Although Tony 'wuved' pizza, he appeared not to like pineapple.

"Tony!" Gibbs stopped the little hand mid drop "Quit dropping it on the floor."

"Yuckie!" Tony handed over the mushed up pineapple to his da-dee, grabbed a piece of pizza and dropped it on the floor instead.

"Tony, No!" Gibbs told the little boy off again.

"Shup-up."

McGee choked on his pizza, Abby spat her drink out with a spray, Kate and Ziva sent a pointed look in McGee's direction and Ducky smirked. Gibbs looked momentarily stunned before he followed everyone's gaze, eyes landing on McGee who was looking extremely uncomfortable.

"Shup-up...."

"Ton..."

Ducky interrupted before Gibbs could finish "Jethro, I advise you, and indeed everyone else to ignore him. He will only continue if you make a fuss over it."

Gibbs sighed and rubbed a hand over his face as Tony continued to sing-song his newfound word "Shup-up, shup-up, shup-up...."

Until this point Gibbs had been so very careful with the language used around Tony, knowing the little boy would parrot everything. Even Mike had been careful while the pair were in Mexico. There was something inherently funny about seeing Mike hold his tongue and try to come up with other words to use instead of some of the more colorful language that was normally ingrained in the mans speech.

"B-boss, look I'm really sorry, I..I.. It just slipped out. I should have been more careful."

"Ya think McGee."

Tony - just as Ducky had predicted - had lost interest in his new word and the adult conversation pretty quickly once everyone ignored him, and was back to dropping pineapple on the floor and wiping the sauce from the pizza in his hair.

After Gibbs had finished his dressing down of McGee (which was pretty tame really - what was done, was done), Gibbs turned to look at Tony, pizza sauce and toppings covered the little face, it was in his hair, in his ears, and even a small piece of what looked like pizza crust was wedged up a little nostril. Gibbs USMC shirt was a mess of little fingerprints but at least it had served its purpose, to protect the clothing underneath.

"McGee, take Tony and get him bathed, you're on Tornado clean up."

"Uh, boss, do you really think that's a good idea..."

The young agent was cut off from saying anything else, by a glare.

"Yes boss.."

Tim grabbed Tony from the highchair, holding him at arms length and disappeared up the stairs.

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It was almost 40minutes later when Tony barreled back into the lounge room, powdery white smudges on his face chest and tummy and also on the cotton black and orange tiger striped sleep shorts he now wore. McGee followed a moment later, covered in wet patches and the same white powdery substance, which by the smell was deduced to be baby powder.

"Oh my gosh McGee..." Kate bit back a laugh, "What happened?"

"Should find the other guy, yes?"

"Its 'see' Ziva, and THAT," McGee pointed to Tony who was climbing up to sit on the couch next to Abby "is the other guy."

"Timothy, how is it possible for you to have bathed young Anthony, and yet he comes out looking almost as messy?" Ducky's eyes sparkled.

"Ohhh, but he smells so nice." Abby took a big whiff of the little boy and gave him a tight squeeze, whilst removing some of the smudges of powder off the tip of his little nose.

"No dis... go'way..." Tony pulled a face as he tried to stop Abby squeezing him, fussing and wiping the smudges off the rest of his face.

"Leave him be for a bit Abb's. He'll be fine, powder will come off on its own." Gibbs spoke noting Tony's frustration - Abby had a heart of gold and Gibbs trusted her completely with Tony, but sometimes she could be a little... too eager... and Tony's tolerance waned, as he got tired.

Abby smiled sheepishly and let the wriggling boy go, joining in instead with the conversation between Ducky, Kate and Ziva, about McGee's latest Tony escapade. Tony climbed back down off the couch grabbing a car from the toy box, and disappeared into the kitchen.

Gibbs went upstairs to grab the matching pajama top for Tony and a clean set of sweats for McGee, the younger agent trailing behind, leaving a fine dusting of powder on the floor.

When Gibbs returned he stopped in the doorway to the kitchen watching Tony fondly, the little boy was currently looking down his pyjama shorts and diaper, not unusual for Tony who had developed a new uh... Fascination - toilet training would be coming soon - but what had really caught Gibbs eye was how much the little boy had grown and changed since he first came into his life. Tony had always been a very good-looking, delightful kid, and as he grew that hadn't changed if anything he'd only gotten cuter. He was a good inch or two taller; his hair although still curling endearingly at the ends was longer, the previously platinum blonde strands had darkened and were now more a light brown, save for the very tips of his curls which were sill quite light in colour. His olive skin was darker, tanned from the Mexican sun, his face was slightly less baby-fied yet even more adorable with expressions than were damn hard to say 'no' to, and his dimples when he smiled were even more pronounced. But his eyes hadn't changed they were the same bright green that sparkled and shined with laughter, love and spirit. Tony was smart too, picking things up quickly. His mind was a sponge soaking up new information, his inquisitive/curious nature leading him to explore everything in his own brand of learning. To say Gibbs was a proud father was an understatement; pride didn't even begin to describe it. He loved the kid with every ounce of his being, with every breath that love grew and grew, there was nothing Gibbs wouldn't do for the boy, nothing. Gibbs watched for a moment longer before speaking.

"Get ya hands outta ya pants Tony." Gibbs smiled down at his boy who ran into the waiting arms and started to rub his eyes sleepily. Gibbs popped Tony's pajama top (white t-shirt with black and orange striped tiger print on the sleeves and cartoon tiger head with the word 'Roar' on the front) over his head and poked his arms through, before hoisting his little boy up. It was funny really, Tony was all energy and movement, go-go-go all day long, but when he got tired, it hit suddenly. One second he could be running wildly around the house, the next second he'd be passed out on the floor.

"Nuggle?" Tony yawned and looked into his daddy's blue eyes.

"What's a Nuggle?" Abby questioned from where she had appeared in the kitchen.

"Nuggle is Tony's word for snuggle.. He get's big nuggle's when he goes to bed. Usually says it when he's tired."

"Ohhh Gibbs, that is soooo cute..." Abby gushed as she watched Tony rest his head against his daddy's neck. "Kate, Ziva, guess what Tony calls snuggles, it's so sweet." The excitable goth ran into the other room, beginning her ramblings and cooing with the other women.

Gibbs rolled his eyes and gave his attention back to Tony. "You ready for bed squirt?"

Tony nodded his head slowly from where it was pillowed, "Ok come on, lets go say goodnight. Then we can have 'nuggles' for a bit."

Gibbs walked into the lounge room, where his family was seated. "Gunna say goodnight Tony."

Tony waved a little hand.

"Say goodnight to Grandpa."

"Nigh-nigh Pa."

Ducky stood and gave Tony a kiss on the forehead "Goodnight Anthony, sweet dreams."

"Say goodnight to McGee and Ziva."

"Nigh Gee." Tony smiled tiredly, "Nigh-Nigh ee'ba"

"Night Tony." "Goodnight my little cheeky butt."

"And Abby and Kate." Gibbs instructed and turned to face the agents sitting on the sofa.

"Nigh A'bee..."

"And Kate..."

"Nigh-nigh Poh-bie." Tony gave a cheeky grin, and blew a little kiss, over exaggerating it the way only a small child could.

Kate looked shocked "Gibbs, why is your son calling me probie...Me?...Of all the people here why am I the Probie? "

Gibbs left the room quickly, ignoring Kate's question. Going upstairs to Tony's room Gibbs placed the little boy in his bed (his old crib lowered, strengthened and without the sides) and 'nuggled' with his boy until he fell asleep, he could still hear the laughter from downstairs it was comforting, things had finally been resolved, everyone was happy and the team dynamic was back. The night had been a success.

----------------------------------------------------

Everyone stayed for another few hours before saying his or her goodbyes. Ducky had opted again to use the guestroom for the night as his mother was away. Gibbs spent half an hour with his boat before making his way to his bedroom, opening the window to let in the balmy night air, showering, and going to bed himself.

He had been lying in bed for 2 hours unable to sleep when he heard the soft pitter-patter of little feet, looking towards the doorway Gibbs saw the culprit silhouetted in the moonlight. Tony toddled over to the bed, little hand holding his pacifier and Labrador toy dragging it half on the ground, his hair was sticking up in every direction curls knotted together at the back where the little boy had rubbed his head against his pillow. Tony looked up at his daddy with sleepy green eyes, his bottom lip sticking out in an adorable pout.

"Da-dee?"

"Hmmm..."

"Up." The little boy asked, already grabbing a fist full of sheet to pull himself up with. Gibbs hoisted his son up and settled him down under the sheets, Tony scooted up against his daddy as close as he could, little head resting on Gibbs chest, looking up and staring intently at his daddy's face, little fingers playing with 'NIS' logo on Gibbs shirt.

"Da-dee?"

"Yeah Tony?"

"Wuv-oo"

"Love you too squirt. Now close your eyes."

"Da-dee?"

"Go to sleep Tony."

"Mo pee'a."

Gibbs barked out a laugh "No, no more pizza. Sleep. Now."

And he did. That night was the first since the whole mess began, that Gibbs slept and did not dream.

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Ok so that was the end of the hiatus theme to the story.... Let me know what you thought of it??? Next up new Tony adventures... Please review I love them and they make my day!