He had always known.

It was as if he had been waiting for this moment all those years. Ever since that defining moment when he had carried out the action, when his finger had squeezed that trigger, he had known this day would come.

It wasn’t as if he hadn’t thought it through. He had turned his idea over a million times before actually doing it. At the time, he had only been concerned with the immediate. He was a wounded father, a broken husband, and his only thought was to stop the animal who was responsible for his pain. The man who had caused his Shannon to die, their daughter wrapped in her arms as the vehicle was crushed around them.

He had wanted to make the man pay for what he did. And he had accomplished that. There was time enough afterwards to think of the consequences. He had told himself that no matter what sentence he ended up serving, it would be worth every moment.

When the initial investigation had been put aside, he had said nothing. Sure, he was surprised, but he took it as a sign. A sign that what he did was the right thing. Who could argue with that? Who else in his shoes wouldn’t have done the same thing?

And so he had lived with his actions. For all these years, he had held the memories inside, forgetting it at times. It sat below the surface, waiting to be brought to light by just the right investigator asking just the right questions.

There were those who knew. Macy knew. Getz knew. The NIS agent who had conveniently left the folder on the table had most likely drawn the correct conclusions. But none of them were close. His team knew about the car wreck. They knew about the cartel ties. But none of them knew the entire truth. They didn’t suspect that their boss was responsible for a murder.

That’s what it was. No matter how much he tried to justify it to himself, he had murdered another human being. Just like the criminals he hunted down every day, he himself was one of them.

And now it had all caught up to him. Tonight, at that very moment, as he stood in his basement, looking back into those distraught green eyes.

She knew. She had probably discovered it right away in Mexico, as soon as she’d seen the bullet. He wouldn’t put it past her. Abby was the most brilliant forensic scientist he had ever known. She knew his past. She knew the tragedy that lay hidden, at least mostly.

Until now. Now she knew it all. She knew his secret, and she wasn’t sure how to process it. To her he was a father, an authority figure to be admired. And he had crushed it all in one moment. Granted, that moment had been years in the past, but when it finally came to light, it was destroying her. He could tell.

He had seen the pain in her expression as she had watched him in the lab earlier that day. Out of respect for him and the hope that the bullet somehow wouldn’t match, she hadn’t said anything around the others. She had waited to run every test, until she was absolutely positive, before confronting him.

The tests had been run, the match had been confirmed, and she now stood in his basement. She stood before him, eyes full of hurt and sadness. She couldn’t figure out how he could have done such a thing.

They both knew what she had to do. There was no way around it. The Mexican authorities were expecting an answer, as were people in Washington now that she had brought the body back with her.

All she wanted was his assurance that she was doing what she should, that her actions wouldn’t cause any bad feelings between them. She wanted to know that he would still be her Gibbs when she told the director.

His heart filled with something he hadn’t known in a while as he looked back at her. He saw her pain, felt his own, and wasn’t quite sure how to handle it.

He could tell her she could do away with what she had found, make something up, but that would never fly with Abby. She would only lose more respect for him, possibly all respect. Yet he knew it would change everything, and he didn’t want that. He wanted things back the way they had been before the whole nasty affair had come back into the light.

But he knew that could never happen. And so the silence hung between them, thick enough to touch, as their eyes locked. Whatever happened now would seal their future forever.