It was a nightmare. It had to be. Gibbs kept wanting to pinch himself, use that little bit of pain to wake himself up. There was no way in hell Tony had murdered some woman, dismembered her and left her legs at Quantico. No fucking way.

Not that Tony wasn't capable of murder or violence; Gibbs knew everyone had the potential for such things. His stint in the Marines, and as an investigator, had certainly shown him that damn near anyone could commit murder and acts of cruelty. And he'd seen Tony use his weapon with lethal force on more than one occasion. But the younger man had only ever done that in the line of duty, in self-defense or in defense of another.

Tony just wasn't the type to ruthlessly kill another without a lot of provocation. If he were the sort to get off on power plays and abuse, Gibbs was sure he'd have noticed that trait after four years of working with the man. And even if he had somehow overlooked it, Kate wouldn't have. That was something a trained profiler should have spotted.

Assuming even Kate was blind to homicidal inclinations at least one of the many women Tony had dated probably would have noticed. If all the women Tony dated were like Paula Cassidy, one of them was bound to have caught on to any violent, abusive, psychopathic tendencies. Paula was certainly strong enough, physically and emotionally, to have lodged some sort of compliant or filed a charge of some kind if she'd ever considered Tony to be a threat. The others were likely to have equally strong minded. But there were no complaints against him recorded anywhere.

Gibbs had never seen him use excessive force on a woman, not even when given reason to. Hell, Lt. Pam Kim had certainly given Tony reason to smack her around. Just egging his beloved car would have been enough incentive, never mind her posting his name on the Herpes website. But Tony hadn't even filed a complaint against her.

Ignoring all that, Tony simply hadn't had the opportunity to kill anyone. The longest Tony had been out of Gibbs' sight in recent months was the trip he'd made to Baltimore to visit with his frat brothers. While it might have been possible for them to have killed some nameless woman and for Tony to transport her body back to Virginia, it was highly improbable and decidedly unlikely. The state of decay, or rather the lack thereof, meant whoever the victim was, she hadn't been dead for weeks. And her legs certainly hadn't been lying at Quantico for more than a day or two at the most. Someone would have noticed. The area might be restricted but it sure as hell wasn't deserted.

In addition to that, Tony hadn't dated anyone other than Gibbs for nearly eight months. Not that Gibbs could tell the Director that. Or the fucking FBI either. Tony's many dating stories were common fodder around the office, so it was natural for people to draw the conclusion that this dead woman might have been one of Tony's recent conquests.

It wouldn't be enough for Gibbs to give Tony an alibi; if they could ever pin down a time of death, Sheppard wouldn't believe him without proof. McGee, Abby, and even Ducky being able to vouch for them as a couple would mean nothing because they were on Gibbs' team and Tony's friends. It wouldn't be unrealistic to think they'd be willing to lie to keep him out of jail. A lie that might ruin his career and Gibbs' might see a bit excessive, but certainly not out of the realm of possibility. And given how firmly entrenched Tony's 'ladies man' persona was at the office, Gibbs had no real doubt about how many people would assume he was lying if he told them he and Tony were a couple.

It was all moot. The former Marine couldn't see Tony letting him do anything that would voluntarily ruin Gibbs' career. Not even to keep Tony from being convicted for a crime he hadn't committed.

No, the best option was to prove that Tony hadn't killed this woman. That he was being framed by someone who knew a hell of a lot about crime scene investigation. It was somewhat distressing to learn just how many people fell under that heading. Narrowing it down to three of the most likely prospects didn't mean they'd really pinned down the only ones capable.

That little detail was making it hard for Gibbs to breath easy. Tony in a cell was another. At least Fornell didn't really think Tony was guilty. Gibbs wasn't sure why exactly...if it was because he had faith in Tony or if it was faith in Gibbs. Tobias was on their side either way and that was all that mattered. Hopefully, they'd have the proof needed to get Tony released before Tobias' reasons were put to the test.

Ziva's faith was another thing Gibbs wasn't sure he could rely on. So far she'd proven her worth and seemed to genuinely believe Tony to be innocent. If asked to articulate why she thought him innocent, she might start to question it rather than just follow Gibbs' lead. It was better to just go with it.

McGee, Abby and Ducky could be counted on. Although, at the moment, everything they found was simply digging the hole deeper. It was aggravating and maddening for all for all of them.

Gibbs sighed. He picked up the pizza he ordered. Tony's favorite. He'd need something to tempt his lover's appetite. Tony had a troubling tendency to not eat when worried, nervous or stressed.

Gibbs walked through the halls. He nodded casually to people he passed, grateful there weren't very many. He wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone. Blue eyes flicked upward noting the location of the security cameras and the guards stationed nearby. He wanted a moment alone with Tony, but he knew that wasn't really going to be an option.

He offered the pizza to Tony. Gibbs stifled the urge to wince as Tony blithely tossed it aside. Damn. He'd hoped for a better reaction, especially when Tony told him he'd been able to smell it coming all the way down the hall.

It was small consolation that Tony was still talking. Him shutting down completely would have scared the hell out of Gibbs, but what he was saying wasn't much better. Tony would be prosecutor's dream; there was no denying it, especially not the way the younger man laid it out. Lot of dating, commitment problems, hostility, mommy issues...Gibbs clenched his hands into tight fists, forcing himself to not ask the questions about Tony's mother that were on the tip of his tongue. Those would have to wait until the case was solved and Tony was safely back where he belonged.

Gibbs wasn't going to let this go to trial. Christ they didn't even know who Jane Doe was yet, much less when she died. He hadn't given up and he wasn't going to let Tony give up either.

Gibbs didn't have all the words he needed to reassure Tony, and likely never would, but he was good with actions. He motioned Tony over to him, waiting until he was close enough to touch. A kiss or even a hug was out of the question, but a light tap under the chin wasn't going to raise any eyebrows. Neither would a smack to the back of the head.

Gibbs knew he'd gotten it right when Tony smiled; a soft, genuine smile for him alone. The quiet, ?thanks, boss, I needed that' was further proof. Tony had just needed to vent, to voice his fears. He needed someone to listen, to know he was just a little scared about how things might turn out, to understand why he had good reason to be worried about how things might play out. Tony hadn't lost his faith in Gibbs or the team.

Gibbs waited just out of Tony's line of sight, making sure the younger man actually ate something. His lips curled in a slight smile when he saw Tony reach for the pizza and pull out a piece. It would be too much to hope that his lover would actually be able to get some sleep. Hell, Gibbs didn't plan to get any either.

Gibbs headed upstairs. He needed a progress report, needed to find something that was going to get Tony the hell out of that cell. He wasn't happy to find out one suspect was dead. It narrowed the possibilities but that wasn't exactly helpful if they were looking in the wrong direction.

"Ziva, get Kim in here."

Ziva blinked. "She's on her honeymoon."

"Your point?"

"I'll get her."

"McGee," Gibbs barked, "find Stewart."

McGee opened his mouth and then snapped it shut. He nodded once. "On it, Boss."

Gibbs wanted to hurry things along, but forced himself to be patient. He waited for Ziva to bring him Kim. He was glad she hadn't bothered to knock or wait for Kim to finish with her new hubby. If Gibbs wasn't enjoying himself, she sure as hell shouldn't be either. Kim's connubial bliss could wait, especially if she had anything to do with Tony currently being behind bars.

Unfortunately, as far as Gibbs could tell, she wasn't guilty of being anything but a vindictive bitch. It made him wonder what the hell Tony had seen in her in the first place. At least she had the good sense to acknowledge the fact that she owed Tony one. He should have pressed charges for harassment. It was petty, but Gibbs took some satisfaction in knowing he'd ruined her honeymoon.

Vindictive bitch that she was, Kim was one more dead end. Damn it. Gibbs wanted to punch the wall; he stifled the urge knowing it wouldn't solve anything and would hurt like hell later. He was glad he had when the Sheppard met him outside the interrogation room. He was in no mood to be lectured about anger management.

Gibbs couldn't keep himself from getting pissy with her. Morrow would have found a way to keep Tony out of a cell. And failing that, he'd have kept the FBI out of it and stayed the hell out of Gibbs way.

He was grateful for her providing Stewart's location, but he couldn't bring himself to express it. Or to apologize for his ?ass kissing' remark. It rankled that she took it upon herself to get involved with his cases. She didn't seem inclined to do that with any of the other teams. What made his so special? Jesus. He never thought he'd regret having sex with anyone so much since his third ex-wife.

Letting Ziva take the lead with Stewart was satisfying. It didn't make up for failing to get a look in the freezer or a list of Jane Doe's, but it came close. They needed to identify the body. He hoped like hell Abby could figure it out.

He knew Abby was pushing herself hard; there was a lot of pressure on her. Part of him wanted to tell Abby to take a break, to back off for a bit, but he couldn't do that. Not with Tony's freedom on the line. Gibbs didn't think she'd listen to him anyway. Tony was her friend too.

Gibbs wasn't sure quite how Abby thought to check the bone marrow registry. She muttered something about a bony ass, but the former Marine didn't want clarification on that. Her thought processes were a mystery best not explored without a good night's sleep and a lot of coffee.

Finding their DNA match alive and well was a bit disconcerting. It would have also been damned frustrating if her being alive hadn't provided them with the real name of their Jane Doe and proof that she hadn't been murdered; she was an accident victim. Tony couldn't have killed her. All they had to do was figure out who the hell had framed Tony and mutilated the corpse of a young woman to do it.

Gibbs sent McGee to get Tony sprung while he and Ziva had another chat with Stewart. Stewart was hardly a font of intelligence or ingenuity. He was malicious and resentful enough to want Tony in jail for murder, but it nagged at Gibbs that the evidence used to frame his agent weren't things Stewart would have ready access to.

The bite mark matched Tony's teeth perfectly. The finger print and glove they found also matched up to Tony. The carpet fiber they found was definitely from Tony's mustang. Stewart had to have had help to somehow collect all those things.

Gibbs grimaced. He hated lose ends. At least they'd found enough to get Tony out of jail. He was eager to see his senior agent back where he belonged. They could tie up those lose ends a together, as a team.

It didn't click immediately when he opened the file Sheppard handed him. The picture of Chip took a moment to register, but when it did, Gibbs was off and running. That miserable son of a bitch had motive, means and opportunity?and he was in Abby's lab.

Gibbs didn't even need to look to know Tony was on his six. He might not know why Gibbs had taken off at a dead run, but that lack of information wouldn't slow Tony down. The younger man never lagged too far behind when it came to following his lead.

They entered Abby's lab, urgency warring with caution, guns drawn. Gibbs breath caught for a moment when he saw her slumped on the stool. He didn't really relax until she turned to look at them.

"Now can I work alone?" she asked pointing to where she had Chip bound fast with what had to be close to a full roll of duct tape.

Gibbs couldn't help but smirk. He looked toward Sheppard. "Well?"

Sheppard cleared her throat. Her chagrined expression spoke volumes for her. "Yes, Ms. Sciuto, I think that can be arranged." She glared at Tony when he snickered. "See to it Charles Sterling is read his rights and charged."

"Yes, Ma'am." Tony dipped his head in an abbreviated bow. The gesture conveyed the same respect his tone had. It was amusing to watch her try to figure out if he was being serious or sarcastic.

"Ziva, McGee, take care of Chip." Gibbs ordered. He wasn't ready to let Tony out of his sight just yet, and definitely not with the little bastard who tried to take him away from Gibbs forever.

Ziva pursed her lips looking down at Chip. "Removing all that tape will be?painful."

One could only hope so, Gibbs thought savagely. He resisted the urge to beat Chip while he was down and vulnerable. He was rather proud of Abby for kicking the little weasel's ass.

McGee and Ziva manhandled Chip to his feet and started dragging him out of the lab. Gibbs hoped they dropped him once or twice along the way for good measure. He had no doubts that they would both enjoy unwrapping the son of a bitch.

Gibbs stepped over to Abby, pulling her into a hug. He placed a kiss on her forehead. "You did good, Abby. Real good."

She was shaking as she returned his hug. He pulled back to look at her, searching her face. "You hurt?"

"No." She shook her head, pigtails flying. "I'm fine." She raised a hand to wipe at her eyes.

"You sure you're okay, Abby?" Tony asked, stepping closer, eyes expressing his concern as he looked her over.

"Tony!!" She launched herself at him. He caught her with a soft 'oomph'.

"Miss me?" Tony laughed as he hugged her. "I wasn't gone that long."

"God, Tony. I nearly put you in jail for life." She didn't quite wail that sentence but her tone was still enough to make Gibbs wince. "I'm so sorry, Tony. You have to believe me. I just lost my way for a bit. I doubted science which I never should have done. It won't happen again. Believe me?"

"Abby?you need to breathe." Tony cut her off, hands moving to cup her face, gently holding her still. "In and out, nice and slow?okay. In and out."

Abby nodded, her eyes closed as she followed Tony's instructions. Gibbs could almost see the tension draining out of her as she started to calm down. It would take more than this for her to really relax, but it was definitely a start.

He made eye contact with Tony. Tony smiled and nodded. He'd take Abby home, keep her company and make sure she unwound as much as possible until Gibbs could send McGee over to take his place. Gibbs still wasn't quite sure exactly what sort of relationship McGee and Abby had, but at the moment he didn't care. Whatever they had it was enough for her to be able to count him.

"Let's get your coat and get out of here," Tony suggested to Abby, his thumbs lightly caressing her cheekbones, smoothing away the few tears that had escaped. Abby nodded tiredly, leaning heavily into Tony to hug him again.

Gibbs could tell the hug meant as much to Tony as it did to her. He wasn't really jealous, but he did envy her having the freedom to hug Tony. He'd like to be able to do the same thing and resented having to wait until they were alone. Gibbs sighed, resigned to the fact that it would be awhile before he could really touch his lover the way he wanted to.

Sheppard opened her mouth to say something; Gibbs cut her off with just a look. If it was about wrapping up the case or cleaning up the mess in Abby's lab, he'd take care of it. Anything else could sure as hell wait until tomorrow morning. She pursed her lips in annoyance but wisely remained silent, turning on her heel to leave.

He was hoping that this latest fiasco would be enough to convince her to stop meddling with his team, but Gibbs didn't hold out a lot of hope for that. He usually regarded persistence was a good thing as an agent, but her continued interference wasn't persistence; it was more ego and pride than anything else. She messed with him and his team because she could, not because she should.

Gibbs didn't believe for a moment that she tracked down Stewart or had given him the case file in an effort to get Tony cleared. No, she'd done those things to prove she could do what he couldn't, that she was still a qualified field agent. If she'd really given a damn about the case or her people, she'd have looked at the file before she'd given it to him. She'd have known before Gibbs that Charles Sterling had framed Tony.

Christ. She should have at least done a thorough background check on Chip. He wasn't qualified to even work for NCIS much less in Abby's lab.

Gibbs rubbed a hand over his face. He was going to have to find a way get Sheppard to stop looking over his shoulder all the time. It had nearly cost him two people.

Gibbs watched at Tony helped Abby into her coat, one arm curling around her shoulders to hold her close. She gave him a tired smile. Tony placed a kiss in her hair.

"You ready?"

"Yeah." Her answer was little more than a sigh.

Gibbs walked with them to the elevator. He couldn't help resting a hand on the small of Tony's back, reassured by the solid muscle and warmth beneath his fingers. Knowing he was out of sight of the surveillance cameras, Gibbs slowly trialed his fingers up Tony's spine. He lightly cupped the back of Tony's neck, massaging the tight muscles he found there. Tony's head tipped forward slightly, letting Gibbs know he appreciated the effort.

A full massage might be in order to really help Tony unwind. It would go a long way to helping Gibbs too. It would reassure him that the younger man was physically fine, and gave him the liberty of touching him everywhere, reconnect on a basic level.

"Your place?after McGee gets to Abby's," Gibbs leaned in to whisper when the elevator doors opened. He thought Tony would be more comfortable in his own space, among his things. Tony had massage oil there as well as that huge bathtub for a good long soak.

Tony nodded once. As he and Abby got on the elevator, Tony looked at Gibbs, jade green eyes questioning, hopeful and expectant.

Gibbs smiled, fighting the urge to get on the elevator with them. "Be there as soon as I can."

The set of Tony's shoulders eased a bit more. He pointed at Gibbs before patting his chest just over his heart. Gibbs made the traditional ?I love you' sign back.

Gibbs sighed heavily when the doors closed, taking Tony and Abby away. He grimaced, glancing around the mess in Abby's lab. He reached for his cell phone. First order of business would be to get someone to clean up the place. Then he'd see if Chip survived his trip to booking with Ziva and McGee. After that he'd see what shit had accumulated on his desk.

He glanced at his watch as he dialed the number for maintenance. He'd be at Tony's place in an hour. Come hell or high water.

Being wired and tired was a bad combination, Tony decided. His body might be ready to crash but his mind was still going a mile a minute. He hated feeling so out of sync, so scattershot and lost.

It was probably worse for Abby, but at least Tony knew what to do to help her. He'd done it for her before, although, he'd never seen her quite this bad. Hell, he'd never been quite this out of sorts himself either. It wasn't every day someone tried to frame him for murder.

A hot shower would help Abby unwind. A long bubble bath would be better, but she vetoed the suggestion saying it would take too long and she didn't want to be in the bathroom when McGee arrived. Given that McGee had already seen her naked at least once, Tony wasn't sure what the big deal was, but he knew better than to argue with her. A hot shower would still give her mind a chance to slow down while relaxing tired muscles.

A cup of chamomile tea moved the process along another step. Tony couldn't stand the stuff himself, but he knew Abby liked it, so he obligingly made a cup for her while she was in the shower. She only drank it at night after a particularly grueling day. The habit associated with a cup of tea, combined with the warmth and natural relaxing properties helped to slow down her still racing thoughts and unknot aching muscles.

She curled up on the couch in her flannel pj's, leaning into Tony as he wrapped his arms around her. He wondered where in the hell she'd managed to find pajamas covered with glow in the dark bats, but resisted the urge to ask. It would ruin the mood. He could always ask another time.

He cued the stereo to play a little bit of instrumental music that few would suspect Abby of even owning. It wasn't heavy metal, screaming guitars or jazz. She'd stopped by his place not long after he started working at NCIS and had mentioned like the CD, so he bought her a copy. It was mostly percussion and flute, sounding almost tribal in the rhythm and cadence. The beat was constant, measured and soothing, rather like a steady heartbeat.

"Feeling better?" He placed a kiss in her still damp hair. Tony wished she'd wear it down more often.

"Much." Abby sipped her tea and sighed. One hand moved curl around Tony's fingers. She squeezed once. "I really am sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry for." He squeezed back. "Not your fault Chip was a nut job out to get me."

Tony grimaced. He should have paid more attention. Chip had seemed vaguely familiar but Tony hadn't given it much thought; certainly not enough to worry about placing his face or name. It was his own damn fault that the little shit had even been able to frame him in the first place. Just like it was his fault for being so stupid he open a poisoned letter, had kissed Pacci's killer, incited his mother's wrath...Tony shook his head. Better to just not think about all that right now.

Abby shifted so she could look at him. "You okay?"

He smiled. "I'm fine."

It wasn't a lie. Not really. He'd be fine. The only thing that had happened to him was spending a few hours in a cell. Hardly the worst thing he'd ever experienced, and definitely not something Abby should be worried about. Not right now.

Tony was glad the only one who'd witnessed his little breakdown in the jail cell had been Gibbs. No one else needed to know he'd been so damn scared he'd gotten diarrhea of the mouth and started babbling about stuff better left buried. Gibbs seemed to understand, thank god. At least he hadn't called him on it or asked any questions. Not yet, but Tony had no illusions. Gibbs would ask eventually. Tony would do the same thing in his place. He sighed softly, not looking forward to that conversation.

"You can go home if you want," Abby offered, her expression serious as light blue eyes studied him. "Been a long day for you too."

Tony shook his head. "I'll wait for McGee." Gibbs was probably still at the office, and Tony really didn't feel like being alone. Although, he did give going for a run serious consideration. Exercise helped him shut off his brain for awhile; let him focus on just moving and his breathing. It was as close as Tony ever came to true meditation.

Abby finished her tea, placing the cup on the coffee table. She slouched down further, head coming to rest in Tony's lap. Abby sighed, yawning widely.

"Go to sleep, Abby."

"You make a good pillow."

Tony chuckled, fingers brushing through her hair. "So Gibbs tells me."

He lightly massaged her scalp. She hummed in appreciation. Tony smiled softly, knowing she'd be down for the count in just a few minutes. Once she was out, Abby would sleep soundly until tomorrow morning. Tony had never met anyone who slept as deeply as Abby. He was pretty sure she wouldn't wake up if a bomb went off. Tony assumed her sleep habits were probably one of the reasons she had so much energy.

He carefully shifted out from under her, substituting a nearby pillow for his lap. Tony cocked his head as he studied her peaceful expression. She really was lovely. He placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Love you, Abby," he whispered. Other than his frat brother, Joe, Abby was his best friend. He saw more of her than he did of Joe, but there was still a lot Joe knew that Abby didn't. Maybe some day he'd consider telling her some of those things.

He looked up when there was a soft knock at the door. Tony opened the door. "Hey, Probie."

McGee smiled hesitantly. "I'd have been here sooner but--"

"You're right on time." Tony made a sweeping gesture, inviting McGee into Abby's place. "She just fell asleep a few minutes ago."

McGee nodded, glancing toward the couch where Abby lay unmoving. "Down for the count then."

"Yep."

McGee gave him a searching look. "You okay?"

"I really need to find a mirror," Tony muttered, not realizing he'd said that aloud until McGee frowned at him. Tony rolled his eyes. "People keep asking me that."

"Well, given that you were nearly on death row, it is sort of a logical question."

Tony snorted. "I was not nearly on death row."

"Abby seemed to think so," McGee offered hesitantly.

"You really think Gibbs would have let it go that far?" Tony arched an eyebrow. His faith in the cell had wavered a bit, but he'd never fully lost it. Not really. Gibbs has saved him from the Black Death for crying out loud, Tony should have known better.

"No, I don't really think Gibbs would have let it go that far." McGee shrugged, his expression apologetic and doubtful as he rubbed the back of his neck. "But Gibbs is not omnipotent."

Omnipotent, no, not really. But Tony hadn't met anyone else who so often made the impossible seem easy. "Close enough to it for me, McGee."

McGee laughed softly, raising a hand for a high five. "Amen, brother, Amen." Tony grinned, lightly slapping McGee's hand.

He looked over at Abby. Now that she was asleep, it probably wasn't absolutely necessary for someone to say, but Tony would feel better if McGee was there. And he knew Gibbs would want someone to make sure Abby had really shaken off the affects of the last two days.

"You okay with staying the night?" Tony didn't want McGee to feel obligated to stay if he wasn't comfortable doing so.

"I'm fine with it."

Tony nodded, accepting the easy answer. He wasn't entirely sure about the nature of Abby's and McGee's relationship. Good friends having casual sex or casual friends having good sex, Tony mused with an internal shrug. It wasn't his place to judge. And unlike Gibbs, Tony knew Abby could more than hold her own. If anyone was going to get hurt, it would most likely be McGee.

"You heading home?" McGee asked as Tony grabbed his jacket, shrugging into it.

"Yeah." Tony rubbed tiredly at his eyes. "Been a long day."

"That it has." McGee gave him a sympathetic look.

"About choking you...earlier...through the bars," Tony cleared his throat, forcing himself to make eye contact. He couldn't quite bring himself to apologize; he wasn't really sorry he'd done it at the time, but he knew he shouldn't have done it. It wasn't McGee's fault he'd gotten himself framed. "It won't happen again."

McGee nodded slowly, clearly understanding what Tony wasn't saying. He smiled easily. "Didn't think it would happen again. Not really expecting to see you behind bars in the future."

Tony grinned. "Your lips to God's ear, Probie."

"I thought you weren't sure there even was a god?"

"Nothing wrong with hedging my bets." Tony shrugged, patting McGee's shoulder. "See you tomorrow."

"Good night, Tony."

"Night, Tim." Tony headed out. He hoped Gibbs wasn't expecting too much from him when he got to Tony's place. Helping Abby had definitely helped Tony unwind a little. A shower, maybe something to eat, and some mindless movie entertainment was about all Tony thought he could handle.

He would love a massage. Gibbs had demonstrated a real skill for giving them. Knowing his lover was good at it had prompted Tony to restock his supply of oils not too long ago, but he wasn't going to ask for one. It just seemed so damn?needy. Tony knew it was stupid and insecure of him, but he was leery of asking Gibbs for too much, of appearing weak in his lover's eyes.

Maybe he could talk Gibbs into a bath with him. He knew the former Marine loved the big sunken tub at his place. It wouldn't seem overly selfish to suggest something he knew Gibbs enjoyed. Tony enjoying it at the same time could be considered a side benefit.

Tony yawned as he got into his car. He was damn glad he'd been able to get her out of the impound lot. She should never have been subjected to having strangers climbing all over her looking for evidence. He patted her steering wheel. "Sorry, baby."

He started the car, letting the engine warm up. He hoped Gibbs would already be there, but wasn't really expecting him to be. Gibbs hadn't changed his habit of staying late at the office wrapping up loose ends. It wasn't usually a problem since Tony often stayed late himself, or went running after work. Just this once Tony wished they'd altered their routines.

"Can wish in one hand, piss in the other, and guarantee which one will get wet." He said to himself, snickering as he remembered the first time Ernie said that. Waiting for Gibbs wasn't exactly a hardship, so he'd just have to suck it up and quit wishing for things to be different.

He lightly stroked the dashboard. "Let's go home,girl."

Gibbs left the office fifteen minutes before McGee did. It was the first and hopefully only time he'd left the office before all members of his team had headed home. He'd always made a habit of being the last to leave, making sure everything was taken care of so that his team could start fresh the next day. But tonight, he needed the extra time if he was going to have things ready before Tony got to his place from Abby's.

Gibbs didn't believe in the benefits of aromatherapy. It was just so much new age bullshit as far as he was concerned. But he liked the scented candles Tony would light from time to time. The light fragrance would subtly permeate the apartment, lingering long after Tony extinguished the flames. It was soothing and comfortable in its familiarity; it was the scent of home, and Gibbs wanted Tony to have that sense of security have spending time in a cell as a murder suspect.

So the first thing Gibbs did when he got to Tony's place was light the candles. There were three his lover typically used. Gibbs wasn't quite sure what the actual fragrances were or why it took all three to create the one scent he wanted, he just lit the ones he'd seen Tony use the most often.

The reddish colored one was always in the living room. It sat on the top of the entertainment center in what looked like an antique silver bowl. The reflective metal was enough to brighten the small flame, adding to the soft glow.

Tony periodically moved the pale green one around the apartment. Gibbs wasn't sure why; he'd never asked. He was just glad he had no trouble finding it the small bookshelf. It was in a similar silver bowl as the reddish one, and the light it cast added illumination to both the living room and the hallway.

The third was a light purple. It was always in the bedroom, usually the last one Tony extinguished at night. Instead of a silver bowl the candle was set inside what looked like very thinly carved alabaster globe. It cast a pattern of light and shadow on the wall that resembled twinkling stars.

Gibbs moved on to checking the fridge to see what Louisa stocked it with. He wondered some times if the woman was psychic. She always seemed to know when Tony's appetite would need a little extra tempting. The top shelf had a Tupperware container filled with Tony's favorite comfort food, spaghetti and meatballs.

He set the table but didn't warm anything up yet. Gibbs wasn't sure if Tony would want to eat right away when he got home. Knowing his lover, he'd want a shower first. A good long soak in hot water would be better.

It shouldn't be too hard to convince him a bath would be a good idea, Gibbs decided with a smile, especially not if I offered to join him. Tony seemed to really like sharing the tub. Gibbs liked it too, more than he ever expected.

His ex-wives usually regarded baths as solo affairs. They were interested in their own personal down time, something he wasn't often included in. He knew he wasn't the easiest person to live with, and tried to be understanding of their need for time away from him. But Tony...he seemed to regard time alone with Gibbs as something precious, something to be savored. Gibbs was most definitely part of the younger man's down time.

Maybe it was because they so rarely had the chance to let down their guard with each other. All the time spent at the office was as teammates, not as lovers. So much care had to be taken not to overstep the lines of propriety. When they had the chance to just be themselves, neither man really wanted to spend time apart. Whatever the reason, Gibbs was just very glad the feeling was mutual.

Gibbs would wait to draw the bath until Tony got home. No point in having the water get cold. Or all the bubbles to lose their foam, he thought with a small laugh. Kelley had loved bubble baths, and he found Tony's similar enjoyment just as endearing.

Gibbs grabbed one of the larger towels Tony had and took it into the bedroom. He placed it and the bottle of massage oil on the nightstand in plain sight. He knew Tony loved having a massage, but his lover never outright asked for one. Hell for that matter, he rarely hinted he wanted one. Gibbs wasn't sure why; he added it to the list of things he needed to ask Tony about. At least with the massage oil and towel sitting where Tony could see it would be obvious Gibbs was offering him one; all the had to do was say yes.

Shannon had often asked Gibbs for a massage. He even went so far as to take a class or two when she was pregnant. The doctor suggested it as a way of helping Shannon deal with lower back pain and swollen feet.

Satisfied that things were as ready as they were going to get, Gibbs striped out of his clothes. He shrugged into the robe Tony had given him. Being in the robe would give Tony another clue that he was more than happy to take a bath and relax with him. Words he wasn't always so good with, so Gibbs was working on getting better at letting his actions speak for him.

He ran his fingers lightly over the sleeves of the robe. Gibbs loved the feel of it against his skin. He sighed, enjoying the smooth silk. He really needed to look at getting one for his house.

Gibbs headed back out to the living room. He eyed the TV warily. He moved on to the stereo, feeling more confident of his ability to use it. All he had to do with the stereo was hit the power button and cue up the right CD. It held a selection of over 60 CD's that Tony occasionally shuffled with the rest of his collection. But he always kept the styles in the same order.

Gibbs knew the first twenty would be a mix of old and new rock and roll. From there, up to thirty-five, would be blues and jazz. After that it was big, band and swing. The last ten would be would be something instrumental. They could be new age or classical. Gibbs never knew for sure what exactly he'd find there, but those were the ones he wanted. Something light, melodic, that could easily become background.

He smiled when the soft stains of an alto flute began filtering through the speakers. There was a time when Gibbs hadn't even known there was such a thing as an alto flute much less be able to recognize the sound of one. Tony had done more to broaden his musical horizons than anyone else in his life ever had.

He turned when he heard the door open. He watched his lover slip inside, blue eyes narrowing as he gave Tony a thorough examination. Gibbs winced seeing the lack of animation in his lover. It was unnatural to see his shoulders slumped, his expression painfully neutral as though he were forcing himself to not think or feel. Damn.

Tony tiredly shrugged out of his jacket, carelessly hanging it on a hook. He kicked off his shoes with a sigh. The shadows under his eyes were so dark they almost looked like bruises. Fine lines bracketed his mouth; lines Gibbs was sure hadn't been there when he left the office.

"Hey," Gibbs called out softly as he approached his lover.

Tony's head came up immediately, shoulders squaring. Gibbs almost hated to see him do that. He was momentarily worried it meant the younger man was going to try and hide the effects of the last few days rather than willingly let Gibbs help. But then Tony smiled. It was a smile Tony reserved just for Gibbs. It was a strange blend of hesitancy and welcome, brassy and shy.

"You're home." Tony sounded delighted and relieved.

"Yeah." Gibbs pulled him into a hug. Tony went willingly, wrapping his arms around Gibbs to burrow in closer, head resting on Gibbs' shoulder.

Gibbs hand rose to cup the back of Tony's head. He lightly stroked the short, soft hair. "You hungry?" Gibbs asked quietly, fingers moving to rub Tony's neck.

"Not really." Tony raised his head. "Was thinking a bath first."

"Sure." Gibbs agreed easily.

"You want to join me?" Tony waggled his eyebrows, patting Gibbs' silk covered chest. "Know you like that big old tub, Jethro. I'll even let you play with my rubber ducky."

Gibbs chuckled, like he had to be lured into it. "You don't have a rubber ducky, Tony."

Tony laughed, eyes warming to moss green. He leaned in, lips just a hairs breath from Gibbs. "Well, okay...I don't have a ducky, but I'm sure I can find something for you to play with."

Gibbs captured Tony's mouth in a fierce kiss, unable to resist the temptation being offered. Even though he initiated the kiss, Gibbs wasn't in control of it. Tony's hands moved to cup his face, tilting his head for a better angle, his tongue caressing the roof of Gibbs' mouth and making him moan. He'd never realized what a hot spot that was for him until meeting Tony. His young lover seemed to take delight in locating every spot on his body that made him gasp, moan, or shudder. Tony found an impressive number of them, and had an astonishing ability to remember each and every one.

He was gasping when Tony finally pulled back. Tony rested his forehead against Gibbs'; his breathing uneven and ragged. "God, I missed this."

"Me too."

Technically, it had only been a day and a little more since they'd last kissed. It had felt like a lifetime, especially when they didn't know for sure when, or if, they'd get the chance to be this close ever again.

"C'mon." Gibbs tugged on Tony's arm. He wasn't going to think about what might have happened. And he definitely didn't want Tony to dwell on it either. "Let's get that bath."

Tony followed him easily. He hesitated for a moment in the hallway making Gibbs look over his shoulder, raising an eyebrow. "You lit the candles."

"Yeah." Gibbs answered even though it was more a statement than a question.

Tony's smile was soft, his eyes taking on a glow that only appeared when something surprised and pleased him. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." The older man was constantly amazed at how little it took to make Tony happy.

Gibbs started the bath water, making sure to set the temperature for what Tony preferred. As stiff as he felt, Gibbs didn't think he'd mind the heat much himself either. He tossed in a handful of bath salts. He had no idea what the hell they were supposed to do, but they smelled nice and Tony liked them.

Tony reached around him to pour a generous amount of bubble bath into the tub. It began to foam immediately, reminding Gibbs of the froth generated by wave action against a rocky shore. It was just part of the appeal, he thought with an inner smile.

Gibbs shrugged out of his robe, hanging it in the usual place on the back of the door. He watched as Tony striped out of his clothes, carelessly tossing them into a pile rather than into the hamper. Gibbs raised an eyebrow in askance. His lover wasn't overly neat, but he rarely missed the hamper, and certainly not on purpose.

"Was thinking I'd rather burn them than wash them." Tony looked away, hands making a helpless gesture. "Haven't made up my mind yet."

Gibbs understood the desire to get rid of things now tainted by a negative association, but he wasn't sure if he should argue or agree. He opted for what seemed like sound, neutral advice, "Sleep on it."

Tony looked up, once more making eye contact. "I'd planned to."

Gibbs nodded. He tested the temperature of the water with his fingers. It was more than hot enough. He turned off the water. They'd found out the hard way just how much was too much. Gibbs chuckled. Having to mop up the bathroom floor hadn't ruined the mood any, but it had nearly resulted in a change of venue.

"What?" Tony asked, arms wrapped around Gibbs waist, a soft kiss placed on his shoulder.

"Remember the first time we did this?" Gibbs raised his hands to capture Tony's, pulling him in just a little closer.

Tony snickered. Gibbs could feel his lover hiding his face between his shoulders. "That was not my fault." That declaration was mumbled against his skin.

"You could have said something."

"I did," Tony protested, pulling away.

Gibbs looked over his shoulder. "Before we got in the tub."

Tony rolled his eyes, a smile lurking about the corner of his mouth. "Picky, picky." Tony waved a hand. "Get in already."

Gibbs stepped into the tub, hissing in response to the hot water. His toes were definitely more sensitive to the temperature than his fingers had been. He eased himself into sitting down, adjusting to the heat before offering a hand to Tony, inviting the younger man to join him.

Tony grinned, taking Gibbs hand. He stepped into the tub, moving carefully to situate himself between the older man's legs. He leaned back, resting against Gibbs' chest, huffing out a playfully breath so that some of the bubbles became airborne. They made it to the edge of the tub, reflecting rainbows briefly before popping against the side.

Gibbs grabbed the washcloth. He lathered it before taking Tony's right hand in his. He very carefully washed each of the long, elegant digits, massaging as he went. He spent time just rubbing the fleshy area between Tony's thumb and forefinger. Gibbs had found out by accident that it was something of a personal trigger point; massaging that area almost always got Tony to relax even when he didn't want to.

Gibbs loved the level of trust implied when more of Tony's weight settled into him. Tony's head tipped back to rest on Gibbs' shoulder. The older man couldn't resist nibbling on the pulse point of Tony's neck. Tony turned his head, clearly giving him permission to continue. Gibbs sucked hard enough to leave a mark.

He released Tony's hand to lazily rub the washcloth up his arm. He bypassed his lover's chest in favor of giving his left hand the same treatment he'd given the right. Tony released a breath with a long sigh of contentment, tension easing out of his shoulders.

"Love it when you do that."

Gibbs smiled. "I know." He sucked on Tony's earlobe, then blew across it. Goosebumps rose along Tony's skin in reaction.

He moved the washcloth to Tony's chest. Gibbs rubbed in slow circles, gradually zeroing in on one of Tony's nipples. He played with first one than the other, enjoying the way his lover responded to him.

Tony arched his back, mutely asking for more. Gibbs abandoned the washcloth, pinching and rolling those tight little nubs between his fingers. He sucked on Tony's earlobe, nipping with his teeth before licking away the small hurt he'd caused.

Tony moaned, his hands gripping and releasing the sides of the tub. His hips were moving lazily, brushing his ass and lower back against Gibbs' hardening erection. The play of hot water and then smooth skin over the head of his cock was a delightful torture. He found himself mimicking Tony's relaxed thrusts, moving easily with him.

Gibbs moved his hands down Tony's soapy torso, caressing his abs, brushing his hips and tops of his thighs, skipping his groin before heading back up. Tony whimpered, clearly wanting more.

"Touch yourself," Gibbs whispered hoarsely. "Show me how you like it."

Gibbs was intimately familiar with just how Tony liked to be touched; he knew how rough to be, how tight to hold, how fast to move. But he also liked to watched Tony do it himself.

"You...are a closet...voyeur." The smirk was obvious in Tony's breathless voice.

"Just for you." Gibbs nuzzled Tony's neck. He didn't care if he ever saw another picture of a naked body or porn film. Tony was who turned his crank. "And you like to show off, don't try to tell me different."

"Just for you." Tony echoed Gibbs earlier statement, shifting just enough to be able to capture Gibbs lips in a sloppy, passionate kiss.

Tony pulled back. The wicked gleam in his eyes the only warning the older man got before Tony turned around so that he faced Gibbs, somehow managing to pull it off without ever really losing contact. The water sloshed wildly for a moment, bubbles rolling with the motion, but never quite escaping the confines of the tub. Tony wrapped his legs around Gibbs' waist and pulled him forward a little. It brought their groins as close together as possible without Tony actually sitting in Gibbs' lap.

"No reason why I can't do us both," Tony grinned, long fingers of his right hand encircling both their erections.

Gibbs nodded, unwilling to trust his voice. The water and bubbles alternately added and eased the friction as Tony started to stroke them both. Tony moved his other hand around Gibbs back, fingers drifting south until they lightly brushed against his opening. He rimmed the sensitive area with his tips of his fingers, teasing with the promise of more. Gibbs bit his lower lip, trying to hold in the little whimpers of pleasure that fought to escape.

"Like that?"

He just wasn't sure he could get anything that resembled words out, so Gibbs opted for a jerky nod. Like it? Oh he more than liked it. Gibbs whimpered, too caught up the moment to care how needy and desperate he sounded.

Tony continued to stroke their aligned cocks, movements deft and sure. Gibbs moaned, head tipping forward to rest on Tony's shoulder when one finger breached his entrance, massaging the tight ring of muscle. Gibbs hips rocked backward and then forward, torn between the two sensations, both sparking jolts of pleasure through him.

Wanting to give Tony as much as he was getting, Gibbs reached around to caress the younger man's back before migrating to his ultimate goal. He fingered the small puckered opening, easing his way in and out, moving with his lover's lazy hip thrusts. His other hand focused on Tony's left nipple, alternating pinching and pulling, matching his movements to the hand stroking their cocks; up, pinch, down, pull, back and forth, in and out.

Tony murmured something indistinct against Gibbs' ear, his voice husky and raw. All Gibbs could make out was ?please', the rest was in Italian, but message was clear enough. He wasn't sure who was leading now as they began moving faster, touches less teasing and more aggressive, focused and intent.

Gibbs could feel small tremors starting to ripple though Tony. Muscles twitched and flexed at random, tightening with a familiar, well loved intensity. Gibbs could feel himself reacting to Tony's burgeoning orgasm as though caught in a feedback loop. He loved that feeling, knowing he was in sync with Tony.

Gibbs gasped when Tony added a second finger, chest arching in surprised pleasure. He shuddered. "Please...Please...Please," Gibbs wasn't even sure exactly what he was asking for, but he couldn't stop repeating the request.

Tony seemed to understand. The spiral of rising ecstasy continued to build. Gibbs could feel the tingle at the base of his spine, could feel it rising and spreading until it flashed white behind his eyes.

He bit Tony's shoulder, muffling his cry of completion, clenching Tony tightly to him. He felt as well as heard Tony's own climax a moment later.

Gibbs struggled to get his breathing under control. He ran his hand up and down Tony's back, soothing away the aftershocks that often flowed through him after a very intense orgasm. Gibbs kissed the bite mark he'd made, glad he hadn't done any more damage than create a bruise that would fade in a day or so.

"You okay?" Gibbs whispered.

"Okay?" Tony laughed quietly. "I'm golden, Jethro."

Gibbs grinned. He placed a soft kiss on Tony's temple. "Good."

"Very," Tony agreed with another soft laugh. He sighed. "Water is getting cold."

He nodded. It wasn't really cool by Gibbs' standard, but it was definitely by Tony's. Gibbs turned on the hot water, reaching for the wand as he pulled the plug. He rinsed away the evidence of their love making and the bubbles.

Tony rose gracefully to his feet, offering a hand to Gibbs. He took Tony's hand, making a conscious effort not to look at him. A naked, wet Tony was a thing of beauty, but if he looked, they'd never get to dinner. The rumbling growl from Tony's stomach was enough to let Gibbs know he'd made the right decision.

"Hungry?"

Tony shrugged, looking a bit sheepish. "Yeah."

"Louisa left spaghetti and meatballs in the fridge." Gibbs tossed him a towel before grabbing one for himself. He was still fond of that heated towel rack, enjoying the feeling of the warm terrycloth against his bare skin.

"Awesome." Tony grinned brightly. Gibbs felt his heart beat a little faster just from the simple, open joy on Tony's face. He never tired of seeing that expression.

"I need to send her flowers or something."

You're not the only one, Gibbs thought with a smile. He grabbed his robe. "C'mon. Dinner's waiting."

"Did your mother really make you wear a sailor suit until you were ten?"

Tony froze, his fork poised halfway to his mouth, totally caught off guard by the question. He closed his eyes, swallowing hard. He should have expected it. Should have known it was coming eventually. It wasn't like Gibbs would have forgotten all the crap Tony had spewed forth while in that cell, more than a little afraid he'd be spending the rest of his life in one. No, Gibbs wouldn't forget it?no matter how much Tony wished he would.

He took a slow, deep breath, and put his fork down carefully, working hard to keep his hand steady. He had expected Gibbs to ask questions about his family at some point, just not so soon. Not after the older man had done so much to make coming home such a pleasant, comfortable experience. Tony thought he might get a short reprieve, at least a day, maybe two.

"Tony?" Gibbs sounded hesitant and unsure, so unlike himself. "I didn't mean to...look, just forget I said anything. I shouldn't have brought it up. I've got lousy timing. I always have. Just...I'm---"

"It's okay." Tony opened his eyes, reaching across the table to take one of Gibbs' hands. He didn't bother trying to smile, knowing it would look forced and unnatural.

Tony wasn't sure where to start. Honestly, he didn't even want to, but he didn't really think Gibbs would let it go. The man was a bit too much like a bulldog. He'd gotten his teeth in; there was no going back now. It was better if Tony told him than if he started digging on his own. At least this way, he could try and explain things, maybe make Gibbs understand.

There was no way he could lie, and pass it off as some sort of joke. The details he'd let slip in the cell were just a bit too honest. And his reaction to Gibbs' question only cemented that it wasn't something Tony could make light of or just dismiss easily. No, it was better to go with the truth. He just wished he was sure what the truth was.

Joe had spent a lot of time trying to convince Tony that he hadn't deserved bearing the brunt of his mother's wrath. Joe had told him time and again he hadn't deserved to be hurt, that abusing a child was not an act of love. Intellectually, Tony understood. Spanking and discipline were one thing, broken bones and bloody knuckles were definitely another. As a cop, Tony had even counseled victims of domestic violence that they were not to blame; that something would always set off the abuser, it wasn't the victim's fault. But when it came to his own life, sometimes it was hard to comprehend how it couldn't have been his fault. At the time, it always seemed that way. He'd done or said something to warrant getting hurt.

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to." Gibbs lightly stroked the back of Tony's knuckles. "I should have waited for a better time."

Tony winced. There was no good time to ask about things like that. Probably never would be.

Tony bit his lip. He took a breath and looked away, unable to maintain eye contact. It wasn't like Gibbs didn't already know he was a first class screw up. So telling him this story shouldn't make him think any less of him. He tried to withdraw his hand, but Gibbs tightened his hold, squeezing gently.

"Tony?"

"It's okay." Tony repeated dully. It wasn't Gibbs fault he'd been an idiot and run off at the mouth. He sighed. It was probably best to just start at the beginning and get it over with.

"She didn't make me wear it." Tony kept his gaze on his half empty plate. "She just threatened to make me wear it until I was ten."

"Why?" The one word question was soft and encouraging.

"Because when I was seven?.I was in this school play." Tony cleared his throat, wishing he'd opted for a beer with dinner instead of water. "I was scared to be up in front of people and my teacher thought the play would be a good chance for me to work through it. She gave me a speaking part. Was only one line. No big deal."

He clenched the hand Gibbs wasn't holding into a fist, hiding it under the table. Tony was afraid his trembling would be too obvious otherwise. Even after all this time, the memory still bothered him.

"I had to wear a costume...little sailor outfit." Tony shook his head, thinking about the damn thing. He'd looked like the cartoon character on the Cracker Jack box.

He took a deep breath and forced himself to pick up the story again. "I wasn't expecting my mother to be there."

"Why not?"

The question sounded like Gibbs was clenching his teeth. Tony resisted the urge to look up and find out for sure. He cleared his throat. "Normally, she didn't bother with school functions. Wasn't really her thing"

Not much of his childhood had been his mother's thing. But the play was a fund raiser, a charity gig that all her society friends were going to. With Tony being in the play, all her friends expected her to be there. Appearances meant a lot to his mother, so she'd been in the audience for the first and only time that Tony could remember.

"I got stage fright." Tony bit his lip. "Just froze up. Couldn't say a word." He swallowed hard, still remembering that moment of looking out over a room full of people and seeing his mother in the crowd. He hadn't been able to move or speak. He was grateful he hadn't pissed his pants; it had been a close thing at the time.

"My mother was...well, embarrassed." Tony hedged. What she'd been was ashamed of him, and absolutely furious that he'd been unable to do such a simple thing that every one of her friends' children had no difficulty with. It hadn't helped matters when he started crying. She hated it when he did that. She must have told him a thousand times, 'real men don't to cry'.

He risked a quick glance at Gibbs. His lover seemed to be listening intently. Tony wasn't quite sure what to make of his expression. At least there was no condemnation or disappointment?yet.

"My mother came up and ushered me off stage." She'd actually put on a pretty good show of her own at the time. No one but Tony realized how angry she was, or how much trouble he was in. To the rest of the crowd Elizabeth DiNozzo looked like a mildly embarrassed, caring and understanding mother.

"It was later?when she was dragging me to the car after everything was all over that?she broke my arm." It had taken years for him to actually say ?she broke' rather than 'I broke' placing the blame for the injury squarely on his mother.

"Jesus," Gibbs whispered, his face tight with anger, blue eyes flashing.

Tony immediately pushed his chair back, tugging on his hand to free it, instinctively trying to put space between himself and Gibbs' fury. He knew he should have just lied. Even a bad lie was better than this. At least then Gibbs would have a good reason to be pissed. He wouldn't be angry with Tony for shit that happened more than twenty years ago. If he'd lied then Gibbs wouldn't know what a chicken shit coward he'd been.

"It was my fault. She didn't mean to. I was just being stubborn and stupid. You know me, Boss, not the sharpest tool in the shed." Tony nearly babbled in his haste to fix the situation.

"If I'd just said the line like I was supposed to. Or if I'd gone out to the car like she wanted, it wouldn't have happened." He should have been less of a big baby and not been afraid to go with her. She only had pull and twisted his arm, jerking him almost off his feet in the process, to get him to stop crying and behave.

Gibbs got up from the table. Tony continued to back up, attempting to put even more space between himself and the older man. Gibbs still looked so pissed. He had to find a way to fix this, to make it right.

"Tony?"

"It wasn't like it was a bad break or anything. I only had the cast for three weeks."

"Tony?"

"And I knew better the next time there was a play. I made sure not to get a part. Wasn't really cut out to be an actor anyway." His mother never came to another school function again, but Tony had learned his lesson.

"She only kept the costume to make sure I didn't forget how I'd screwed up. How much I'd embarrassed and disappointed her." Tony stopped himself from admitting how just having his mother mention the damn suit would make him blush and stammer.

"Tony." Gibbs trapped him against the counter. He raised one hand, and Tony flinched, telling himself he'd been stupid to believe Joe. No one else was going to understand. It was his fault, it always had been. He should have just said so and Gibbs wouldn't be so angry now. Gibbs would never blame someone else for his mistakes. He'd take responsibility for his actions, and it was only right for him to expect Tony to as well.

Instead of the slap he was anticipating, Gibbs lightly cupped his face, eyes no longer spitting fire. He looked...worried. "Breath," Gibbs commanded softly. "In...and out."

Tony obeyed automatically. He hadn't realized until that moment just how ragged his breathing was, how close he was to hyperventilating. He looked away, embarrassed by is near panic.

Gibbs patted his cheek, drawing Tony's focus back to him. "I'm not mad at you."

Tony searched Gibbs' eyes, not entirely convinced. "You are mad," he countered warily. He knew the signs too well.

"Yeah, I am." Gibbs' seemed to struggle to keep his voice even. "But not with you."

"Okay," Tony stretched the word out, not so much implying agreement as asking for clarification, green eyes still scanning Gibbs' face anxiously.

"I am angry with your mother."

Tony blinked. Gibbs was angry with his mother? "You...I don't--"

"You were seven, Tony." Gibbs smiled gently, blue eyes holding green. His expression hardened. "Stage fright isn't something to be ashamed of. And it sure as hell isn't something worth breaking a child's arm over."

Tony shook his head, torn between wanting to believe Gibbs and the firmly ingrained belief that it was his fault. He found himself repeating what his mother told him on the way to the hospital the next day. "Should have just said the line. If I wasn't such a coward---"

"You were a child, Tony. You. Were. Not. And. Are. Not. A. Coward." Gibbs emphasized each word, eyes daring Tony to contradict him.

Tony struggled to comprehend that Gibbs didn't think it was his fault. That he wasn't blaming him. It seemed almost surreal. Tony felt like pinching himself to make sure this wasn't a bizarre dream.

Gibbs gaze softened. "It is okay to be afraid once in a while. Everyone is."

"You're not." Tony could feel his face warming. He sounded childish to himself, but he couldn't quite fathom Gibbs being afraid of anything. Okay..uneasy maybe, or wary of say a ticking bomb or a coiled rattlesnake, something genuinely dangerous. Gibbs never seemed to be at all afraid of anything, and certainly not people.

Tony hadn't even realized he'd said the last bit out loud until his lover responded. "Not now," Gibbs admitted, "but I used to be."

Tony stared at him. "You were really," he hesitated, unwilling to accuse Gibbs of being scared. He licked his lips. "You were really?uncomfortable with being in front of people?"

"I really was." Gibbs nodded, his smile turning rueful. "Basic training took care of that for me."

Basic was intended to not just teach combat skills but to also build confidence. Tony smiled hesitantly. He should have signed up for a stint in the military. He probably would have if Sully hadn't been so adamant that he go to college.

"Unless I'm addressing troops, I still don't like being in front of a crowd." Gibbs shrugged. "It's one of the reasons I don't accept that stupid award every year."

Tony found himself chuckling weakly, leaning into Gibbs'. He sighed when Gibbs pulled him into a hug, welcoming the embrace, dropping his head to his lover's shoulder. "And all this time, I thought you didn't accept them because you thought they were stupid."

"They are stupid." Gibbs snorted, one hand rubbing the back of Tony's neck. "It's not a competition. It's our job?our duty. I don't want or need an award for doing it."

"They like to acknowledge you're hard work."

"I'm part of a team, Tony." Gibbs squeezed his neck, shaking him gently. "Don't do it by myself."

"I should have been wired." Tony snickered. "No one will ever believe me if I tell them you said that."

Gibbs lightly slapped the back of his head. His lover immediately tensed and started to pull away. "Shit, Tony, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have--"

"S'okay, Boss." Tony grabbed his arm, green eyes meeting blue. "You said a smack to the back of the head is a wake up call." He smiled, not wanting Gibbs to feel bad about something so minor, something he'd come to expect and rely on. "Slap to the face would be an insult, right?"

"Right." Gibbs still looked apologetic.

"I don't mind, Jethro." Tony knew the head slaps were just Gibbs way of making his point. They were proof that what he did and said mattered enough for Gibbs to actually make note of, expecting him to give his best and not let him get away with less. They were proof Gibbs gave a damn even before they started sleeping together, and their sleeping together hadn't garnered him special treatment on the job.

Gibbs frowned. "I don't want you to think I'm like your mother."

Tony shook his head. "Don't see how I could." Gibbs wasn't anything like her.

"She hurt you." Gibbs looked torn between being stricken and pissed. "I hurt you?"

"It's not the same thing." Tony countered. Gibbs had never really hurt him. "And you know it."

"Do you?" Gibbs asked. "Do you know it's different?"

Tony hesitated for a moment, giving the earnest question the serious consideration Gibbs' tone demanded. Gibbs and his mother had nothing in common. Gibbs barked, his mother had shrieked. Gibbs wanted him to do his best; nothing Tony did was ever good enough for his mother. Gibbs made him feel safe; his mother had always made him feel anxious and uneasy. Gibbs only smacked him when he genuinely deserved it, and Tony knew he deserved it. The head slaps weren't hard enough to bruise, much less break bones. His mother hit him whenever she felt like it, and never cared if she hurt him or not. She never seemed overly concerned with the injuries she'd inflicted unless they were likely to be noticed by someone else.

"Yeah." Tony smiled, feeling like he suddenly understood what Joe had been trying to tell him. "I know it's different."

"Good." Gibbs nodded. The tension drained out of his shoulders. "We're okay, then?"

"Yeah, we're good."

Gibbs leaned in and kissed him. It was a feather light meeting of their lips, chaste and sweet. "You want to finish dinner?"

Tony rested his head on Gibbs' shoulder again, grateful that the older man was willing to redirect the conversation. He knew the topic of his childhood and his mother would probably be revisited, but he just wasn't up to talking about more of it. Not tonight.

"Tony?" Gibbs patted his back. "Dinner?"

"Think I'm done." Tony closed his eyes. He was exhausted. The day had been one hell of an emotional roller coaster.

"Okay."

Tony hugged Gibbs loosely, relieved that he wasn't going to push it. Food could wait until tomorrow. He sighed. Tony really wanted to just go to bed and forget about the rest of the world for awhile. But he knew he wouldn't be able to sleep yet. There was still too much crap swirling in his head.

"You want to watch a little TV with me?" Tony could go for something mindless, something that had nothing to do with real life or him or Gibbs or anything at all.

"Sure." Gibbs kissed his temple. "Go turn on that technological monster you call a TV. I'll clean up in here."

Tony smiled. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Gibbs stepped back. "Go on. I'll join you in a few minutes."

Gibbs' eyes drifted from the TV to Tony. The younger man rested against him, his back against Gibbs' chest, his head on Gibbs' shoulder. Tony was solid and heavy, all long bones and lax muscle. His breathing was deep and even, green eyes closed, fine lines around his eyes speaking more of exhaustion than age.

Gibbs was not surprised Tony had dozed off. It had been a rough day to say the least. He placed a kiss on Tony's temple, fingers sliding through his lover's hair. Tony sighed softly, a muted sound of contentment.

Gibbs glanced at the TV. He really had no idea what the hell he was watching. He'd spent more time concentrating on his lover, senses attuned to Tony rather the flickering screen. Cocking his head to one side, Gibbs frowned unconsciously trying to place the action he was seeing as he continued to run his fingers through Tony's hair.

It was definitely not one of those idiotic reality TV shows. Thank god. Gibbs got enough of stupid people on a daily basis. The last thing he wanted was to watch morons via for their fifteen seconds of fame.

He grinned when he finally placed what he was seeing. He wasn't entirely sure how he could have missed Tom Selleck or the red Ferrari. Tony had the entire Magnum series on DVD. He wasn't quite sure he understood the appeal, but he didn't really need to. Tony liked it and Gibbs didn't mind watching it.

Gibbs eyed the remote and debated turning off the TV. The sudden silence would wake Tony. It always did. And Gibbs wasn't sure he wanted to wake him just yet.

Gibbs bit his lip. He was such an idiot for bringing up Tony's mother. He should have waited. Although, he wasn't sure there would ever really be a good time to talk about that bitch and what she'd done to Tony. He was sure there were times that were better than others; there always were, he just never realized it until after the fact. God, my timing stinks, Gibbs thought with a silent sigh.

Still, he'd gotten an honest answer to his question. He just wished he'd been better prepared to deal with it. Even knowing what to expect hadn't made it any easy to hear how Tony's mother had berated him and broken his arm when he was seven. Jesus. His rage had been so white hot that for a moment Gibbs hadn't been able to breathe or think clearly. He'd scared Tony with his anger. In all the time they'd known each other that had never happened before. Gibbs never wanted it to happen again.

Gibbs shook his head. The medical history Sam had given him supplied him with some of what Tony had gone through, but it didn't cover everything. The why and how were definitely details Gibbs needed to know, and Tony was the only one who could provide those.

Gibbs was relieved that Tony was willing to talk to him about what had happened. It was certainly a start. And it was an astonishing display of trust.

Gibbs kissed Tony's temple again. He wasn't sure he'd be able to do the same thing if Tony ever confronted him about his past or his family. How the hell Tony could ever think of himself as a coward was beyond him. The younger man was a lot stronger than he gave himself credit for.

Gibbs knew he'd have to be careful when he brought the issue up again. Letting it go wasn't really an option. It was obvious the damage done had been more than just physical. He knew it wasn't uncommon for victims of abuse to blame themselves, to believe it had been their fault, but it had never occurred to him that Tony might fall into that mindset. I am such an idiot, Gibbs though, resisting the urge to smack himself.

While Gibbs didn't really believe in therapy or spilling his guts, he did see the value in it for other people. Tony had been revealing more and more details of his childhood and Gibbs was astute enough to know that meant the younger man needed to talk about things, was finally ready to start dealing with them. Marriage counseling and job required counseling sessions had taught him that much.

Gibbs wasn't entirely convinced he was the right person to help Tony, but he couldn't see his lover trusting very many people with the details. And he knew himself well enough to know, he didn't want someone else to help Tony. He wanted to be the one to make Tony feel safe. Gibbs wanted to be the one to make Tony feel loved and valued. He was determined to do the best he could and hope like hell he didn't make too many mistakes.

Gibbs smiled wryly. No pressure. None at all. He was damned lucky Tony was so forgiving. Hopefully he wouldn't test the younger man's limits.

Gibbs sighed. He bit his lower lip, uncharacteristically uncertain of himself and his course of action. He weighed the options and nodded to himself.

He'd have to be patient, wait for another opportunity to bring up Tony's mother and his childhood. Not for the first time did Gibbs wish his timing and instincts were better when it came to emotional stuff. He was getting better?or at least he thought so. Tonight certainly hadn't been a complete disaster. It had actually turned out better than he expected given Tony's initial reaction.

His jaw tightened as he thought about what Tony had said. God damn woman, Gibbs cursed mentally. She was lucky to have been killed in a car accident. He hoped there was a vengeful god torturing her soul.

Tony shifted restlessly, at though he sensed Gibbs' mood. The former Marine had forgotten how in tune to him Tony could be at times. It was uncanny.

Gibbs forced himself to take a slow, deep breath and unclench his fists. He'd already let his anger get the better of him once tonight scaring the hell out of Tony in the process; he wasn't going to make that mistake again. Gibbs took another deep breath, holding it for a count of ten, waiting for Tony to settle again

Feeling calmer, Gibbs glanced at his watch. It was late, later than he was usually up unless he was working on the boat. He rubbed at his eyes, wincing at the gritty feel. He hadn't slept much last night. Only seemed fair since he was certain none of his team had either.

Gibbs yawned widely. They really should get up and go to bed. Tomorrow would be coming soon, and they'd need to get ready for another day. Hopefully one that was a lot less stressful.

He pointed the remote toward the TV, hesitating for a moment before reluctantly hitting the power button. He breathed a soft sigh of relief when the plasma screen went dark rather than blowing up. Just as he expected, Tony's eyes opened immediately.

"Boss?"

"I'm here," Gibbs whispered. He carefully wrapped his arms a little tighter around Tony so his lover could feel as well as hear him.

"Wha' time is it?" Tony mumbled, rubbing at his eyes.

"Time for bed."

Tony's chuckle was a warm, raspy sound. "You woke me up to tell me to go to bed?"

"Yes, I did." Gibbs hugged him. "I like this couch, but I prefer sleeping in your bed."

"Yeah." Tony yawned. "Me too."

Tony rolled smoothly to his feet. He stretched, arms over head, back arching into a tight bow before releasing to bend forward and touch his toes. Gibbs envied him the ease of moment. It had been a few years since he'd been able to stretch like that without joints popping, muscles and tendons protesting.

Tony straightened and offered him a hand. Gibbs took it, smiling slightly. He didn't need help getting up, and he knew Tony knew that. It was just an automatic offer, a way for them to stay connected.

He used their joined hands to pull Tony into a hug. Gibbs liked the way they rested against each other, drawing and giving strength at the same time. The closest he'd ever come to a similar feeling had been with Shannon. He sometimes wondered if Tony had ever felt the same way with someone else, but he had never been able to bring himself to ask.

Tony patted his shoulder before stepping back. He walked over to the candle that was still burning and blew it out. Gibbs become so accustomed to the scent and flickering light he'd actually forgotten it was even still lit. He turned off the small lamp on the end table.

They headed for the bedroom together, fingers and shoulders brushing as they moved. They parted at the door to the master bathroom. Gibbs let Tony take care of his own nightly ritual, heading into the bedroom.

Gibbs regretfully placed the massage oil back in the nightstand drawer. He didn't think either of them were really up for it now. He'd offer Tony a massage tomorrow. Make up for missing out on it tonight.

"Bathroom is all yours."

Gibbs nodded. He quickly brushed his teeth and gargled some of Tony's sinfully expensive mouth wash. Stuff had to be worth it because Tony never woke up with morning breath that Gibbs had ever noticed. Not that it mattered much if he did. It would take more than morning breath to keep Gibbs from kissing him.

Gibbs wasn't comfortable sleeping naked. Too much time in the Marine Corps sharing space with a lot of people, and then having a daughter in the house had made him leery of going to bed without something on. He had grown accustomed to sleeping in a pair of Tony's silk boxers. Tony had bought him several pair of is own, but Gibbs preferred the ones he'd stolen from his lover.

He left the nightlight on in the bathroom and the door open enough to allow the dim light to filter into the bedroom. Tony had gotten the small light after Gibbs had caught his little toe on the dresser one night. The layout of the room and location of everything was now as familiar to Gibbs as his own bedroom, but he liked having that little bit of light just the same. It was one more thing he'd grown used to.

Tony held up the comforter in an open invitation. Gibbs slid into his side of the bed. He sighed when Tony curled in close, head on Gibbs' shoulder.

Gibbs rubbed his cheek against Tony's hair, pulling the comforter up so that it covered Tony's back and shoulders. "You warm enough?"

"I'm good." Tony patted his chest in a gesture of affection.

Gibbs smiled. "Love you, Tony." Saying ?Love you' was almost a ritual way for him to end the day. He'd missed being able to say it yesterday. God damn little weasel, Gibbs thought, hoping like hell Chip was finding his new accommodations at NCIS terrifying.

Tony tilted his head, placing a light kiss on Gibbs' chest. He didn't vocalize it as often as Gibbs, but the older man knew the kiss was Tony's own ritual of expressing his love.

Gibbs closed his eyes and breathed out a silent prayer of thanks to any deity who cared to listen. He was grateful for the man in his arms, for the chance he'd been given to know him, to love and be loved by Tony. Tony was a blessing he never wanted to take for granted.

"Stop thinking," Tony mumbled against his skin. "It's too loud."

Gibbs laughed softly. "Sorry."

"S'okay." Tony curled in closer. "Sleep now. Think later."

Gibbs smirked, relaxing further. Tony rarely gave him orders to do anything. Sleep now. Okay. He could do that. Not like he had any plans to argue with Tony about ordering him to do something he was already planning to do?eventually. They could always argue about it tomorrow. And maybe work in a little make up sex while they were at it. Gibbs smiled. Yeah, that was a good plan. Definitely. A damn good plan.

The end