That Darned Cat

Special Agent Gibbs and his team sat at their desks in the bullpen, working diligently on several open cases. Suddenly NCIS director Shepard strode into the room, her very being electric with determination and her eyes sparking "no bullshit." She was followed by a young man wearing camo and leading a dog.

As she stopped in front of Gibbs desk, he stood up and leaned on his knuckles.

"What the hell, Jen?" he asked.

"I keep hearing rumors," she replied.

"What rumors?" he demanded to know.

"That there's a *cat* associated with your team."

"So what if there is? You've got a dog," he said, pointing at it.

"This dog is specially trained. It's a bloodhound, and it's trained to find people—or in this case, cats."

Gibbs had been keeping his voice low, but its intensity signified to anyone who knew him that he was making an effort to keep anger in check. "So what exactly is it doing here?"

Jen crossed her arms and tapped her toes as she replied, "It's going to sniff the members of your team to see if any of them smell of cat."

For a long moment, Gibbs stared at her as if in disbelief. Then he burst out into mirthless laughter.

"Sniff away," he said, swinging his arm to indicate his team, who were watching with expressions on their faces ranging from quizzical to mild horror.

Jen turned to nod at the young man; at her signal he led the dog to Agent Tony DiNozzo's desk. DiNozzo, characteristically, immediate began trying to ingratiate himself with the dog.

"Hi, there, big fella," he began. He held his hand out, expecting the dog to sniff his fingers, but the dog chuffed at him and ignored the fingers. The dog was wearing his "uniform," a special harness which meant he was on duty and not amenable to socializing, even with the most charming of NCIS agents. He used his nose to investigate carefully DiNozzo's clothes and desk, but he apparently smelled nothing feline and looked up at his handler waiting for further orders. The young man shook his head at Director Shepard and then moved to the desk occupied by Agent Tim McGee. McGee had stood up and moved to the corner of his cubicle, holding his hands up and sweating slightly.

After getting no response from the dog's inspection of McGee and his area, the dog handler indicated a "no" to Shepard. As he approached Mossad Officer Ziva David, she protested. "Jen, is this really necessary?"

"Yes," Jen answered coldly. "Something's going on, and I want to know what it is before I'm humiliated in front of other agency directors."

Ziva too passed the dog's sniff test.

Now it was Gibbs himself who had to endure the dog's inspection, but, as with the others, he passed without triggering a response from it.

"Ma'am?" asked the young soldier.

Jen's toe had never stopped tapping during the inspection. At his question she unfolded her arms and leaned on Gibbs' desk.

"I don't know what's going on, but I am going to find out one way or the other," she growled at him. "That is both a threat and a promise."

"Whatever," Gibbs responded resignedly, spreading his arms in acquiescence.

She spun around and began walking out. "With me," she ordered the dog team.

Heading for the elevator, she heard DiNozzo's voice singing a jingle from a commercial for flea powder.

"Oh, there may be bugs on some a you mugs, but there ain't no bugs on me."

As she stepped onto the elevator with the young man and the bloodhound, she heard the sound of the three agents' raucous laughter.