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Gibbs had nothing more to say. There just wasn't anything left to say. Tony could see how exhausted He was, how defeated, yet His body was still wired taunt. Tony gently led Him upstairs, the quiet man silently complying. Tony started the shower and efficiently stripped off his own clothes and then peeled off the many layers Gibbs was wearing. He gave Him a little nudge and got Him under the hot water and climbed in after him.
His body was one big knot under Tony's strong hands. The slippery shower gel letting his hands slide easily over His back and shoulders. The shower was eerily quiet. There was none of the normal teasing, none of the normal banter, none of the normal arousal. Just quiet. Tony got them washed and rinsed and was trying to process in his own head what to do. They toweled off and Tony placed a gentle hand on His back to guide Him towards the bed.
He pulled back the covers and nudged Him to lie down and He complied, the eerie silence almost overpowering in the room. Tony went around to the other side of the bed and crawled in, not exactly sure how his next action would be taken. They didn't cuddle, didn't hold each other, they had Abby for that particular need. But somehow Tony knew that that was exactly what He needed tonight. But not from Abby.
Tony slid towards the center of the bed and spooned up behind Him, noticing that He was gripping the pillow so hard His knuckles were white. He started with a gentle stroke on His arm, softly running his hand all the way down His arm to those tense knuckles.
Again and again he repeated the motion, not saying anything in the quiet where all he could hear was the sound of their breathing. Until he heard Him bite back a sob. And then he wrapped his arms around Him tightly and whispered in His ear, "Let it go."
When He shook His head, refusing, Tony squeezed harder and said in a firm, low tone that he had never used with Him, "Let it go. I've got You."
The sound began as a low vibration, a testament to the fact that He was still fighting to contain it, until He couldn't and it erupted as a heartbreaking wail. Wave after wave He sobbed, crying for her, crying for Him, and crying for what was lost. Crying because he could. He held on to the arms Tony had wrapped around Him in a death grip as if He were afraid Tony would let go.
He was broken, He had shattered. And in that moment, everything that He had been teaching Tony in the past year all fell in line for Tony. He recognized the exact moment He had shattered. Recognized that he had given Him exactly what He needed. And recognized that He still needed more.
Tony kept that low, firm tone and reassured Him, "I'm not leaving." He entwined their fingers and continued, "Let it all go, I've got You." Tony felt Him relax back in to him slightly as he held Him through the storm.
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Being back in the light wasn't easy. It took work and strength and it was exhausting sometimes. And it was lonely. She missed Him. Missed him with every one of her shattered pieces that she had worked so hard to patch back together.
It took two years before she was strong enough in mind and body to return to work. And she was glad to be back. They found a place for her working cases that had run cold. And she was good at it. She was able to chase the monsters in the dark that thought they had gotten away with their crimes. And it was satisfying to destroy that illusion for them.
Her confidant became her friend. And their emails and phone calls eased that loneliness a little, but he wasn't Him.
As the time slipped by she tried to date, tried to be the woman she once was but it was impossible. She did try once, with a beautiful man with a gentle smile and tender hands. But she couldn't go through with it, and he was understanding. She would have almost preferred that he had been angry. She didn't try again. Instead she just tucked that part of her away, to be forgotten.
But it was never completely forgotten. In her dreams she would remember. Remember the feel of His hands on her making her tremble and beg, the taste of His mouth on hers, the heady smell of His body, and joy of having Him inside her. And it took a long time for her to admit to herself that it wasn't that she didn't want to have someone inside her but rather that she only wanted Him inside her.
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Abby let herself in. And not seeing the men up and about in the kitchen she headed upstairs. She stood in the doorway to the bedroom and just took in the scene before her. They had apparently had sex given the tube on the nightstand and the empty condom wrappers but the view on the bed was telling her that somehow the dynamic had changed between the two.
Her boys didn't cuddle. Well, with her they did, but they patently avoided cuddling with each other. Yet here they were, Tony on his back with Gibbs lying on his chest, Tony's arms around Him protectively. It was beautiful and she took a mental picture to treasure.
She slipped back downstairs and started the coffeepot brewing knowing that would get them up.
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Evie got up and splurged on ordering room service, she just wasn't up for hotel room coffee. She ran through quick shower and was dressed when her breakfast arrived.
She sipped her coffee as she efficiently packed up her belongings. She smiled thinking that tomorrow she would have breakfast on the beach.
She finished eating and zipped up her suitcase. She slipped on her shoulder holster and snapped her Sig in place and hid it all under a navy blazer.
She gave one last look around the room and flipped the lights off as she left, humming a little Hawaiian melody as she headed for the elevator.
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Tbc…feedback adored :)
Only one more chapter to go!!
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