Chapter Three
Tony looked at Gibbs for long moments, absorbing what the other man said. Even as Tony’s heart soared, he couldn’t quite allow himself to believe what he'd heard. He was Gibbs’? Gibbs wanted him?
“Yes, Sir,” Tony whispered. “I’ll try not to blame myself.”
He couldn’t wrap his mind around how this had happened, the commanding Gibbs giving way to a more gentle one, steel wrapped in cotton for the moment. Tony knew that would change and welcomed it, but for now, it was as if Gibbs knew exactly what he needed before Tony did. Anticipation. Gibbs had always stressed that at work, but Tony had no idea his boss"his new Master"was so good at reading people off hours. Made him wonder why the three marriages hadn’t worked.
“Stop analyzing me,” Gibbs said and there was a clear command in that voice that had Tony’s head angling downward, his cock throbbing urgently.
“Ah, Tony,” Gibbs said in a soft voice, hand brushing through his hair again. Tony leaned into it, feeling like a cat or dog that was being petted by a beloved master. “Remember, the rules are suspended for now. Until we’re done eating. Need you to talk freely to me. And that is an order.”
Tony responded to the gentle command, lifting his head, realizing Gibbs needed the equal ground for the moment. “Talk about what?”
“Tell me about what you’ve done, Tony. Have you been Dominated?” Gibbs smiled faintly. “Abbs trained you at all?”
Tony snorted and shook his head. “No. No way. I couldn’t look at her the same way afterward.” Talking freely now was a bit easier.
“But you have been,” Gibbs continued. “By someone. A woman, but you always wanted a man.”
This was uncomfortable territory, but Tony knew they had to visit it before they got in any deeper. “Yeah. Couple of times. Just scenes at clubs.” He met Gibbs’ eyes. “Never wanted a guy"like that. Until I met you.”
“Oh?” Gibbs asked, leaning in.
Tony nodded, swallowing hard, trying to find the right words. “Something about you, Gibbs. Don’t know what it is.”
“But my boy knows his Master,” Gibbs finished.
Tony blinked a few times and then shrugged, unsure how to answer that.
“You’ve wanted me since we met, DiNozzo. I saw it in your eyes. First I thought it was a father figure, then I smelled you getting turned on every time I slapped your head. You ever jack off thinking about that? You ever act up just so I’d do that and you’d have fresh fantasy material?” Gibbs’ voice was a silky rumble that wrapped around Tony, cocooning him, protecting him from the outside elements.
“Yeah. I…” Tony flushed darkly.
“I know.” Gibbs brought a thumb across Tony’s lower lip, stroking it. “A little pain turns you on. A commander you can trust makes you safe. I know...” Both hands burrowed themselves in Tony’s hair and Gibbs pulled his face close. “I know,” he whispered.
“You do?” Tony asked, barely audibly.
“Giving a little pain turns me on. And taking care of someone special is what I was put here to do. Not gonna fail you.” Gibbs’ eyes took on a liquid sheen and Tony realized with a start that this was about far more than just him. The failure to protect his wife and child must have damn near killed Gibbs. And then there’d been Kate, Paula, even Pacci. And now Jenny…
“Couldn’t fail me. Been on your six for seven years, nowhere I’d rather be.”
“Almost got you killed a few times,” Gibbs pointed out.
“And you even more often. I might have had the plague, but who got bombed and nearly drowned in the last two years. You’ve got it all over me.”
Gibbs blinked a few times and seemed to shake off his emotion. “And who saved Maddie from drowning? Who rescued me? Hell, didn’t even thank you, Tony.”
“You were kinda busy remembering how to breathe again,” Tony teased. That night had been rough and yeah, he’d been hurt that Gibbs hadn’t so much as given him a smile or a nod.
“Screwed up,” Gibbs admitted in a rare show of vulnerability. “Not the first time I did with you.”
Tony shrugged, uncomfortable with the fact that Gibbs was blaming himself. They didn’t need to go down this road. There was way too much darkness there. “And I’ve screwed up too. And we’ll screw up again, Boss, and you too. But we’ll manage okay. We always do. We’re survivors.”
“Survivors,” Gibbs echoed, nodding. He didn’t stop touching Tony, and Tony relaxed into the warm callused hands that stroked over his cheek, his lower lip, that ran in soothing motions through his hair.
“Never imagined you to be a touchy feely guy,” Tony remarked quietly.
“Hands on, DiNozzo. Like feeling different textures under my hand. Rasp of stubble, damp hair, soft lip.”
Tony had the distinct impression that Gibbs had done this before, maybe even with a group of people, and that pissed him off. Gibbs was his"his boss, his lover soon, his Master. He emitted a small growl.
“Easy,” Gibbs whispered, giving Tony a quizzical look.
“Not sharing,” Tony replied sharply. He realized he was breathing harshly, his heart racing, panic threatening to crowd in. What if Gibbs used him and then threw him away. What if…
“Not sharing,” Gibbs repeated. “Only you and me, Tony. Just us. We’re the keys to fixing the broken things inside each other.”
The words relaxed Tony, the intent Gibbs was conveying clear. “You think we’re broken?”
“I know we’re broken. Before this, before Jenny, maybe even before Kate.”
Tony had never looked at it from that perspective, but he found himself nodding.
“You ever deal with Kate’s death, Tony? Outside of drowning yourself in a bottle?”
Tony flushed a little. He really didn’t want to get in to this. “McGee and I messed around a little.”
“Second base? Comfort?” Gibbs asked.
“Yeah. I…we…Neither of us were experienced.”
“But you needed something and wouldn’t come to me. That changes, Tony. Has to change right now. I’m your safe place, got it? You come to me with everything. I don’t care how trivial you think it is. Ya gotta understand here. In order for this to work, you put yourself in my hands. Totally. Completely. Ready for that?”
It was a longer speech than Gibbs usually gave and the meaning and intensity was very clear to Tony. It was a chance to put his life in Gibbs’ hands, his emotional security, which was more important in some ways than his physical life. And it was something being offered on equal ground now.
Tony met Gibbs’ eyes, nodding. “I’m ready to be yours, Gibbs. To trust that you’ll give me whatever you think I need.”
“To trust that I know best?”
Tony nodded. “To trust that you know what I need more than I do. I trust you, Gibbs. Wholly. My life has been in your hands more than once. I agree. You have the control now, Gibbs…Sir…Master.”
“Good. Gonna be a hell of a ride, Tony.”
“Climbing on board, Boss,” Tony said with a smirk.
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