Chapter 13: Breaking Bowls
Gibbs leaned into the kiss, taking care not to put too much pressure on Tony’s tender ribs. He let Tony take the lead for a moment and then pulled back and shook his head.
“I’m not in this to be a distraction for you, Tony,” he said quietly. “I want this as badly as you, but I don’t want Declan in bed with us,” he said firmly.
Tony nodded and tried to pull Gibbs back down again. Gibbs leaned down and kissed him chastely. “First you take your meds, then we continue where we left off. I’ll be right back--I’ll leave the door open so you can see I’m only stepping to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.”
Tony watched him with wide eyes as his lover stepped quickly down the hall, disappeared inside the bathroom for only a few seconds, before returning and closing the door, pill bottle in hand.
“Don’t need ‘em,” Tony argued as Gibbs shook the pills out into his hand.
“There’s no reason for you to hurt. You just slapped me with an arm that has a broken collar bone Tony. You’re hurting. You don’t need to hide from me.”
Tony reluctantly took the pills and swallowed them down with the cup of water Jethro always kept for him by the bed. Satisfied, Gibbs set the pill bottle down on the bedside table and crawled up on the bed so he was straddling Tony, much like he’d done earlier in the car. Sitting on his hands and knees over Tony, Gibbs leaned down and kissed him, his tongue probing and exploring Tony’s mouth, pressing his lover into the pillow, taking complete control.
Tony kissed him back, but could feel Gibbs easily dominating his mouth. Surprisingly it didn’t make him feel nervous or scared in the way that it had when Declan acted similarly. Tony knew Gibbs was paying attention to every detail surrounding Tony--the expression in his eyes, the way he was breathing, if he was breathing, if he was hurting, if he was scared--all of it. Tony ran his free hand up and down the outside of Gibbs’ arm, feeling the strength of the muscles there.
Finally Tony broke the kiss and stared up at Gibbs, both men breathing had.
“Fuck me,” Tony whispered. “Please Jethro…fuck me please,” Tony begged.
Gibbs smiled softly at Tony and shook his head. “Not fucking,” he said, “not tonight. Tonight I’m going to love you.” He leaned down and kissed Tony again softly, passionately.
Tony’s eyes widened as he returned the kiss. Never, ever in his life had he felt so special and loved as Gibbs made him feel tonight--and it seemed Gibbs wasn’t interested in stopping.
“I’m going to make love to you,” Gibbs whispered. “Is that okay?”
“Please,” Tony whispered softly against Jethro’s lips as they pressed to his own.
Reaching down, Gibbs pulled the waist band of Tony’s sweats down to expose a little portion of his hips. Moving from the bed, Jethro pulled the sweatpants off his lover kissing every inch of skin as he exposed it.
Once Tony was naked from the waist down, Gibbs quickly shed his shirt and boxers before crawling back onto the bed with Tony. As soon as skin came into contact with skin, both men mewled at the sensation of being that close to one another.
Gibbs pulled back slightly and looked over at the nightstand hoping to see something they could use for lube. Seeing a bottle of lotion, Gibbs opened it and squirted some into his hand. He smiled down at Tony as he rubbed his hands together to warm the lotion. Satisfied that his hands were slick and warm enough, Gibbs pressed his hips tightly against Tony, and wrapped his hand around their two erections.
Tony arched off the bed when Gibbs’ hand touched him. He stared up at Gibbs, eyes wide, in awe that this was actually happening. It was too good to be true.
Gibbs watched his lover carefully. Tony watched Gibbs for a bit before looking around him, trying to memorize this moment and record it forever.
“Look at me Tony. Just watch me. I don’t want you to get lost right now--stay with me okay? It’s just you and me, we’re together, we’re safe, and I’m loving you. Stay with me and enjoy that.”
Tony wrapped his good arm around Gibbs’ neck and nodded. He focused on Gibbs’ eyes--he had really incredible eyes--and on the calloused hand that was currently wrapped around his still growing erection. Gibbs was squeezing and pumping his hand nice and slow and…ohhhh Tony groaned--Gibbs had his erection in his hand too--both of them were squeezing and rubbing together…God it felt amazing.
His eyes closed suddenly and Tony fought them open again. This felt so good…being with Gibbs in any way was more than he could have ever hoped for…and this was just…
Tony yawned. Gibbs took the opportunity to smother Tony’s mouth with another dominating kiss. Tony liked kissing Gibbs--he had a power about him, an authority--Gibbs told Tony he was safe just by the way he kissed him. The sensations were building and Tony couldn’t help it as he thrust up against Gibbs’ hand surrounding their cocks.
“Easy,” Gibbs whispered softly, smiling down at Tony in the moonlit room. “Just take it easy, I’ve got you.”
Tony gasped as Gibbs rotated his hips, grinding them against Tony’s and increasing the sensations for both of them. Breathing harder, Tony smiled up at Gibbs, leaning up into the kiss and trying to reclaim some control of the situation. He couldn’t let Gibbs have all the control without a fight. He wasn’t some weak, submissive…
His thoughts began to trail off when Gibbs suddenly nipped his earlobe bringing him back to the present. “Stay with me,” he said gently, “you alright?”
Tony groaned. “Y-you get me th-this c-closeeee and…assssssk m-me…that?”
Gibbs smiled down at his younger lover. “Wanna make you cum…gonna make you cum with me,” he groaned and he squeezed their erections and moved his hand slower and then faster.
That was all it took to send Tony spiraling over the edge. He thrust his hips hard into Gibbs’ hand, crying out as the passion of the moment overwhelmed him and clawing at Gibbs’ shoulder with his good hand.
Gibbs’ eyes narrowed when Tony’s eyes rolled back in his head and his hand dropped limply to the bed beside them. Pulling back from his lover, Gibbs looked him over carefully before smiling slightly. Tony was flat on his back, t-shirt covered in sticky, quickly cooling cum, breathing deeply and completely relaxed. Gibbs shook Tony’s shoulder carefully.
“Tony? Babe you ok?”
Tony groaned and snuffled a little bit, pulling Gibbs down on top of him and wrapping his arm tightly around the older man. Gibbs chuckled and gently disengaged himself from Tony. Tony moaned at the loss of the body heat and Gibbs quickly hopped off the bed and went quickly down the hall to the bathroom where he grabbed a washcloth out of the closet and wet it with warm water. He took it back to the bedroom while it was still warm.
Tony groaned again and Gibbs put a steadying hand on Tony’s shoulder to keep him from rolling over. He gently eased Tony out of his t-shirt and wiped Tony clean before cleaning himself off. Then he crawled back into bed, and gently eased Tony into his arms. Tony immediately snuggled around him, tucked his head into the crook of Jethro’s neck and was quickly sleeping soundly again. Gibbs shook his head at Tony and smiled. Pulling the covers up over them, Gibbs quickly joined his lover in sleep.
xxx
Gibbs was pleased. In the days following their trip to the movies and the subsequent near run in with Declan, Tony slowly became increasingly independent. Under Gibbs’ constant care and love Tony was beginning to gain some weight, and was becoming more able to assist with his own care than he’d been when he first came home from the hospital. Ducky came by a couple of times to check on Tony, each time clucking with approval of the progress Tony was making.
By the weekend, Tony thought he was feeling up to seeing the team. He and Gibbs discussed it at length and decided that on Saturday night it would be good to have Abby, McGee, Ducky, Kate and Palmer over. They would grill out and have an early dinner--guaranteeing that Tony could be safely locked in the house by dark. He was still nervous about nights and darkness.
Saturday morning Tony woke to the smell of coffee brewing and bacon frying. He took a deep breath and smiled, loving how domestic they’d become. Laying in bed, troubling thoughts began to drift through his mind. Was Gibbs trying to catch Declan? What would happen once they caught Declan? What would happen once all this was over? Would Tony have to go back home? Would Gibbs want him to leave? Did Tony want to leave? He’d never truly been on his own before…did he dare try it? Could he do it? Clearing his throat, Tony called for Gibbs. Despite his newfound independence, Tony still required help getting up and down.
A moment later a freshly showered Gibbs appeared in the doorway, coffee mug in hand and a smile on his face. “Thought you were going to sleep through the cookout,” he said with a smirk. “How you feelin?”
“Need the head,” Tony replied.
Gibbs immediately moved to help Tony out of the bed. Tony was moving a bit more stiffly than he’d been moving and Gibbs knew it was from all the hard work Tony had been doing to be so independent, as well as…other activities.
“Oughta take it easy today Tony,” Gibbs said when he heard the near silent moan of pain from the younger man as he was moved. “Been workin hard…next week’s your big appointment with the surgeon--he might put you in physical therapy or something then. Let me take the bulk of you moving around for the next few days alright? Just take it easy. You don’t have to be running marathons by Wednesday.”
Tony nodded and let Gibbs have a little more of his weight. If there was one lesson he’d been taught by all of this, it was to lean on others, namely Gibbs.
“Time is it?”
“After eleven. Those painkillers help you sleep for a long time,” Gibbs commented.
“Feel like a zombie after I take ‘em though,” Tony grumbled. “If I don’t shoot my mouth off in some insane rant, then I’m acting like a complete idiot.”
“It’s alright,” Gibbs murmured in his ear. “You’re my idiot.” He laughed when Tony swatted at him with his good hand. “C’mon,” Gibbs said, “the team will be here around two.”
After he was showered, dressed, and fed, Gibbs moved Tony outside to the double chaise lounge to enjoy some early afternoon sun while he prepared the grill. Tony was doing much better these last few days, hadn’t had any more panic attacks, but he still preferred to stay close to Gibbs. Gibbs shot him a small smile and a wink, raising his beer in a silent toast to his lover. Tony smiled and raised his own beer before taking a healthy slug off of it.
“Doin’ ok?”
Tony swallowed his beer and nodded. He had talked to Ducky and Gibbs and told them he wanted to go off the heavy painkillers during the day, and they agreed. Tony had been doing everything the doctor had instructed without any argument or protests. Gibbs and Ducky were both shocked by it. Tony was known for not following doctors’ orders.
A sound from the front of the house caused Tony to immediately tense up, quickly trying to hide the terror on his face at the unexpected noise. Gibbs moved to Tony’s side and put a hand on his shoulder. “Easy,” Gibbs soothed softly. “Probably just someone from the team. Want me to go see?”
Tony shook his head, his face paling slightly. “No,” he whispered. “Stay here. Please,” Tony pleaded, trying not to sound desperate.
Gibbs ran his hand over Tony’s hair and pressed a quick kiss to the top of his head. “Hey. You’re safe here. It’s just our friends. You’re gonna be fine, just relax.”
Gibbs stayed close to Tony until he nodded, fighting for control. A moment later Gibbs’ back door opened and Kate and Abby stepped out on the patio.
“TONY!!!” Abby squealed, running for the chaise lounge. It had been almost a month since she’d seen her friend and she was so excited when Gibbs called to invite her to the cookout. She came to an abrupt halt when she saw Tony recoiling from her overeager approach.
“Tony?” She said much softer, slowing down at the end of the chaise lounge. “You okay?”
“Hey Abs…sorry ‘bout that…I’m fine,” Tony said softly.
Kate stepped up next to Abby. “How you doing Tony? Heard you had surgery--you doing okay?”
Before he could answer the backdoor slammed again and Tony immediately tensed back up and backed away. He could feel that familiar tightening feeling in his chest and felt his breathing hitch just slightly. Abby stepped closer, a hand reaching out to offer help, but he shrunk back, eyes slamming shut and shaking his head in a silent plea to not touch him.
“HEY!” Gibbs’ voice rang out and the others all froze. “Why don’t you guys make yourselves useful and get inside to help get everything ready?”
The group quickly scrambled to be helpful, including Ducky, Palmer and McGee who had arrived only moments before. Once everyone had scattered, Gibbs turned to Tony. “If it gets to be too much just say so. Or give me a signal--something I won’t miss okay? I’ve got your six,” he said quietly.
Tony nodded nervously and took a sip of his beer. Gibbs patted his good shoulder and stepped back to the grill, giving Tony some space.
“Thanks Jethro,” Tony said softly.
Ducky stepped out onto the patio and shut the door quietly behind him. “Jethro I think it would be wise if you go speak with the others. I’ll stay with Anthony.”
Gibbs glanced at Tony. “How much do you want me to tell them?”
“As little as you have to,” Tony said softly.
“They’re your friends Anthony,” Ducky admonished gently. “They only want to help you.”
“Tell them as little as you have to,” Tony said again, a little firmer. Gibbs nodded and stepped inside.
Ducky sat down on a nearby deck chair and began softly regaling Tony with a story from his past. Tony tried to listen, but he heard something in the bushes…something that got his attention. He looked out over the yard…something was off…something was wrong…Tony felt like someone was watching him. He glanced around but didn’t see anything.
Ducky walked to the table where he poured a glass of lemonade. He handed it to Tony, whose hand shook just slightly when he accepted it, and took away the beer bottle. “You look a bit nervous Anthony. Are you alright?”
“Y-yeah Duck,” Tony said softly. “I’m fine.” He sipped his drink nervously. He couldn’t stop looking around…there was something out there that they were missing and Tony didn’t want to think about what or who it could be.
xxx
“We need to talk,” Gibbs said without preamble when he walked into the house. “Living room,” he said without looking back or slowing down. The others scrambled after him.
Once everyone was seated, Gibbs looked around. “I know you’re all curious about what’s going on with Tony.”
“What happened to him Gibbs? He’s never backed away like that before,” Abby wailed, her face a mask of despair and concern. Tim reached out a nervous hand and patted her awkwardly on the shoulder.
“Seriously Boss,” Kate said, “Tony always whines about a paper-cut but this…he’s never acted this way before. It’s almost like he’s scared of us.”
“Tony was attacked,” Gibbs stated, sitting down on the coffee table, “while we were on vacation. He called me to come help, but asked that no one else be told. Ducky knew because he was with me when I got the call. Tony spent nearly a week in the hospital. He’s had surgery on his ankle, we find out this week if he needs surgery on his knee, and he’s got multiple broken bones.”
Gibbs looked carefully at each member of the team. “But the worst damage was emotional. Tony has been completely traumatized. It’s important that you realize that today isn’t about you all--it’s about helping Tony recover. He needs to know you’re still his friends, but he also needs you to respect his need for privacy and space. If he recoils from you, back up. If he snaps at you, don’t take it personally. Don’t pressure him to talk about what happened. If he feels comfortable he’ll tell you.”
“Why doesn’t he want us to know?” Abby’s voice was softer now, tinged with hurt. “We’re his friends…”
“Because he’s embarrassed. He thinks you all will view him as weak if you know what all happened to him.”
“What all did happen to him, Gibbs?” Palmer spoke up, glancing around at the others, wondering if he’d overstepped his bounds. As the newest member of the team, he was still trying to figure out and understand his role within the group.
To Palmer’s surprise and relief, Gibbs didn’t get mad. Instead he looked…sad? “The worst possible things you could imagine,” Gibbs replied softly, looking at each person in the room. “Tony almost didn’t survive. If he hadn’t managed to get away and call me to come get him he would not have survived.”
“Where was he when he got attacked, Boss? We could go search the scene--see if we can figure out who did this?” Gibbs looked at his Probie. The kid would prove to be a good agent one day, Gibbs was sure of it.
“He was at home when he was attacked and he was attacked by someone he cares about. We don’t need to do an investigation to find out who it was,” Gibbs said softly. “Tony and I know who did it and why.”
“So who did it and why?” Abby spoke up again, her fingers twisting together nervously.
Gibbs shook his head. “Not important right now. The important thing today is Tony. Remember what I told you. Give him some space, but try to cheer him up. Distract him from everything that’s happened. He needs you here as his friends today, not as investigators. Leave your questions at the door. We clear?”
Everyone nodded. “Clear Boss,” came several whispered replies.
“Alright,” Gibbs said softly, “help me get the food ready and let’s get this party started.”
xxx
Ducky was trying to distract Tony from being nervous when Gibbs returned outside.
“Tony?” Gibbs immediately noticed how pale Tony was and moved to his lover’s side. “You alright babe,” he asked softly.
Tony shook his head and looked nervously around the yard. “Something’s out there,” he murmured. “He’s out there…he’s going to find me…”
Gibbs cupped Tony’s face in his hands and moved between Tony and his view of the yard. “No one is going to hurt you here. Declan doesn’t know you’re here. You’re safe here, alright?”
Tony blinked, ashamed when tears filled his eyes. God he was so emotional these days it was just terrible. “Okay,” he whispered.
Gibbs tapped him twice under the chin, drawing a small smile from the younger man. “Do you want to go back inside?”
Tony looked around. Everything was set up to eat outside. It was a beautiful day, the sun was shining and it was warm on Tony’s pale skin. He didn’t want to go inside--he wanted to do whatever he pleased, dammit, without being afraid.
“I want to stay outside,” Tony said softly, “I just can’t shake the feeling that someone’s watching me.”
Gibbs narrowed his eyes slightly. Tony had good instincts--Gibbs trusted Tony’s gut almost as much as he trusted his own. “Where,” he said shortly, standing up and looking around.
Tony indicated the bushes on the edge of Gibbs’ unfenced lot. Narrowing his eyes, Gibbs moved quietly to the bushes. He looked carefully but didn’t see anything. A moment later the neighbor’s dog leapt out of the bushes startling the three men in the backyard.
“Ah there you see Anthony, it’s merely the neighbor’s Yorkshire Terrier,” Ducky said, letting out a relieved breath and chuckling softly. “Nothing to worry about.”
Gibbs puffed out a laugh in relief as well, and looked at Tony. The younger man looked like he wanted to sit down and cry. Gibbs moved back to Tony’s side. “I looked Tony. There’s no one out there. Just that damn yappy dog. You’re safe alright?”
“Thank you for believing me,” Tony said softly. “You checked even though you didn’t think there was anything out there. Thank you,” he said gratefully.
“I want you to feel secure here. I’ll look under beds and in closets and bushes--whatever it takes to make you feel safe alright? You’re safe here and we’re gonna keep it that way.”
Tony nodded and realized his hands were shaking and the whole team had joined them on the patio in time to see his little meltdown.
“That smells great,” Palmer said pointing at the grill. “I am starved.”
Moving back to the grill, Gibbs whispered his thanks to the younger man. He knew that no matter what, Palmer had Tony’s six. The others gathered round, and began recounting events of things going on in the office--gossip about who was dating, who was in trouble, and what the latest rumors around the office were.
“I heard that some new person down in dispatch got written up for giving out personal information on the agents over the phone,” Abby said, slurping on her drink noisily.
Tony’s gut immediately tied into a knot and he shared a surreptitious glance with Gibbs. “Did they say which Agents had information shared on them?”
“Nah, but then I heard that rumor wasn’t even true, so who knows,” Abby said.
“Tony have you watched any good movies lately,” Kate asked. “I mean since you’ve been kinda laid up I figure you’ve had some time to catch up on some movies.”
Tony smiled and Gibbs smirked as he stood at the grill. “Saw some Bogart movies the other night,” Tony said, his eyes lighting up a bit with the memory of their trip down to Stephens City. “That was fun. Gibbs actually watched the movies with me.”
“Wow Gibbs I didn’t think you’d abandon your boat to watch a movie--especially an old movie--and especially with Tony,” Abby snarked. She meant the comment to be teasing towards Gibbs and totally missed the look of hurt that flashed across Tony’s face. Gibbs saw it and narrowed his eyes.
“I don’t mind movies, Bogart, or DiNozzo’s company,” Gibbs snapped at her. Seeing her wilt a bit under his gaze and clipped words, he turned back to the grill, shooting Tony a wink that no one else could see.
xxx
After eating the huge meal that everyone had helped prepare, McGee pulled out a huge tub of ice cream that he’d picked up. “I even got chocolate sauce, Tony. I know you always talk about how much you love chocolate sauce.”
The ice cream bowl slid out of Tony's boneless fingers and the glass bowl crashed to the ground quickly drawing everyone’s attention. For a moment everyone looked at questioningly at each other trying to figure out what had just happened. Gibbs was the first one to recover and moved to Tony’s side.
Tony didn’t make a sound, but flinched back and shook his head, eyes wide like a deer in headlights, staring at something no one else could see with a look of complete fear marring his features.
“Party’s over,” Gibbs said quietly to the others who looked at each other for a moment before springing into action. “Don’t worry about cleaning up I’ll take care of it later.”
Ducky moved to Gibb’s side. “Would you like me to stay for a few minutes longer Jethro?”
Gibbs ran a hand over his face and nodded. “Yeah, yeah I dunno what the hell just happened here, but…ah Christ Ducky,” Gibbs said softly.
Tony suddenly began to heave and Gibbs knew what would come next. “Trash can--now!”
Ducky managed to get the salad bowl under Tony’s face just in time to catch as Tony began to vomit violently.
“Easy now dear boy, you’re going to strain your ribs just relax,” Ducky guided him carefully as Gibbs brought over the larger trash can. Ducky dumped the bowl’s contents into the trash as Tony began to heave again. Gibbs ran his hand lightly over Tony’s shoulder blades, frowning when Tony flinched away and heaved harder.
“I’m not going to hurt you Tony. It’s Jethro, you’re safe. You’re at my house. Try to relax,” Gibbs said running his fingers through the back of Tony’s hair.
“I’ll just go get him a damp washcloth Jethro,” Ducky said and moved inside. He was surprised when he saw the rest of Jethro’s team--minus Palmer--standing in the kitchen observing the events on the porch.
“You should be ashamed of yourselves,” Ducky admonished angrily. “Jethro asked you to leave because Anthony requires privacy and here you are--his friends--staring at him when he is at his most vulnerable. You should be ashamed.”
“We’re sorry Ducky,” Abby said, “but we wanted to see what made Tony so upset--everything was going great then all of a sudden he--”
“Anthony is going through quite possibly the most difficult time in his life right now. You--his friends--are supposed to be supportive! THIS--this is the last thing he needs right now. Get out--all of you just go home and leave him alone. And I had better not hear one remark made about the events you have just witnessed. Do I make myself clear?” Ducky couldn’t remember the last time he’d been so angry.
A chorus of “Yes Ducky” and “Sorry Ducky” emerged from the group as they made their way to the front door of their boss’ house.
“Jethro invited you here to help Anthony,” Ducky continued his tirade, following the others to the door to make sure they actually left this time. “You aren’t helping him this way. You have to earn his trust--Anthony is barely able to trust anyone right now. If you value your relationships with him it would do you well to respect the boundaries he has established. Now go home like Jethro told you to, all of you.”
Ducky was mightily impressed that Jimmy had chosen not to partake in the team’s snooping. After slamming the front door closed the ME stepped to the bathroom Tony was using during his stay to get a washcloth when he heard a sound coming from the bedroom. Tony’s near constant fear and panic kept everyone around him on high alert these days so Ducky stepped silently toward the bedroom. What he saw caused him to pause and smile.
Jimmy was in Tony’s room carefully changing the sheets on the bed and fixing it so it would be ready for his friend whenever he returned. Ducky softly cleared his throat and Jimmy looked up, startled.
“D-Dr. Mallard…I know that Gibbs told everyone to leave, b-but I thought it might be nice for Tony to have…” Jimmy’s voice trailed off as he gestured helplessly at the bed. “I was trying to be helpful,” he finally said in a small voice. “I heard you fussing at the others. I tried to tell them not to eavesdrop--Gibbs always catches them, but…but they wouldn’t listen to me.”
“You’re a good lad, Mr. Palmer,” Ducky said with a gentle smile, resting his hands on Palmer’s shoulders. “However right now Anthony is feeling very poorly, and I think he may desire some privacy.”
“Of course Doctor, I’ll just…go now,” Jimmy said awkwardly, quickly smoothing out the bed one last time and quietly leaving.
xxx
Gibbs moved the trash can away and squatted down in front of Tony once he’d stopped throwing up. “Hey,” he said softly, running his fingers across Tony’s temples lightly and through his hair. Tony shivered lightly at the gentle touch and Gibbs’ eyes narrowed slightly. “You cold Tony?”
Tony didn’t answer. Gibbs could tell by the look in Tony’s eyes that he was still lost in whatever nightmare he’d drifted away to. Ducky appeared by his side and together they carefully cleaned Tony off, concern on both of their faces when Tony didn’t react or respond to the cool dampness of the cloth.
Gibbs moved to carefully sit next to Tony on the double chaise lounge, reclining a bit and pulling Tony down with him to rest his head against Gibbs’ chest. He nodded at Ducky who sat down in the deck chair he’d been using for most of the afternoon.
After a bit Gibbs felt Tony stir and the younger man let out a soft sigh. “You with me?” Gibbs kept his voice soft; he wanted to gently coax Tony back to awareness, he didn’t want to scare him anymore. He’d obviously had enough of that.
Tony nodded his head slowly, but didn’t lift his face to look at the two men in his company.
“Were you remembering something?”
Tony nodded, his head moving jerkily, nervously. Yes, definitely remembering something.
“You wanna talk about it?”
This time Tony’s head moved in the other direction. No, he didn’t want to talk about it--not at all.
“I think it’d help you feel better if you got it off your chest. We can face it together if you tell me,” Gibbs suggested softly.
Ducky was in awe. He’d known for a long time that Gibbs had feelings for Tony and vice versa, but to see the steps they’d taken together in the last few days--to see the progress that had been made in their relationship--was truly a wonderful thing, and a great relief to the old doctor.
Tony shifted a bit on Gibbs’ chest and Gibbs ran a slow hand up and down Tony’s spine.
“What made you sick Tony? Can you tell me that much? I want to make sure not to bring it around again,” Gibbs said softly.
Tony whimpered when the memory hit again and buried his face in Gibbs’ shoulder. Gibbs frowned at Ducky. Whatever it was that was stuck in Tony’s head was really upsetting him badly this time. Gibbs held Tony tighter.
“It’s alright Tones,” Gibbs murmured in his ear. “I’m right here. You’re safe. Tell me what it was that triggered the memory. You don’t have to tell me the memory if you don’t want to, but tell me what triggered it please.”
Tony blinked. Gibbs never said please. He swallowed hard and slowly eased himself up and looked around. Everyone was gone except Gibbs and Ducky. Tony let out a slow sigh.
“You’ll laugh,” he mumbled, eyes on his lap.
Gibbs tapped him on the back of the head with only a fraction of the force he typically used. “I won’t laugh,” Gibbs whispered firmly in Tony’s ear. “I won’t ever mock you. You can’t help this Tones, you can’t. It’s not your fault.”
Tony looked up at Gibbs who nodded gently and then over to Ducky who leaned forward slightly in his chair. “You can tell us Anthony. You’re safe with us.”
“It was,” Tony’s breath caught in his throat. He’d never told anyone about this. “It was…” his eyes dropped back to his lap and he laughed humorlessly and shook his head, feeling foolish for being so upset. “The chocolate sauce,” he whispered, running his hands over his face. “I freaked out over some fucking chocolate sauce.”
TBC…
Chapter End Notes:
Slash warning! :)