2 weeks later.
Gibbs drove McGee to his house. The arraignments had all been made and Tim seemed to make a lot of progress with Gibbs help. His ribs and lungs had healed and his bruises and scars had either vanished completely or were almost gone. He was acting like his old self. Gibbs pulled up into his driveway, he was finally home with his young lover. They had spent every day and night together since Tim's rape. Now they were home. Gibbs hoped McGee would want to stay with him even after Jeff and Paul as well as Ducky said he was okay to be on his own. The more he was around McGee the more he loved the young man. Gibbs helped Tim get settled in the master bedroom as he was about to leave he stopped and asked, his hope soaring, “ Do you want me to stay in here with you Tim or would you be more comfortable with me in the other room?”
“I would really like it if you slept with me. Since you have been staying with me I haven't had any nightmares. Besides I really like the feel of you next to me not to mention the other benefits....” Tim said as he blushed and grinned like a Cheshire cat.
“ That's good cause I wasn't planning on leaving my lover alone in my big ole bed anyway.” Gibbs said teasingly as he kissed Tim.
Both men laughed as Gibbs went downstairs to start dinner. “Gibbs what's for dinner? I am starved that hospital food was bad.” Tim yelled just as Gibbs reached the bottom of the stairs.
“ How about steak, baked potatoes, and salad. Don't forget the beer to wash it all down with?” Gibbs yelled back as he stepped into the kitchen.
A few minutes later McGee appeared in the kitchen. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“ You just take it easy I have this McGee.”
“ It smells wonderful. My mouth is watering just from the smells.”
Just as Gibbs turned the steaks he found himself wrapped in his young lovers arms and he relaxed into him.
“Jeff and Paul are supposed to come over in a bit. Ducky also said he would be by to check up on you. I was hoping that you would make the desert and the salad for tonight. Unless you want to be the desert?” Gibbs said grining at the last part as he watched his young lovers face turn red. Just as McGee was about to answer the doorbell rang. Since bringing Tim home Jethroe had started locking the door. The team had been over a couple of times since Tim came home but a stern look from Gibbs told them not to ask to many questions.
Gibbs opened the door and was shocked to see Jeff, Paul, Tony, Ziva and Ducky all on his front porch.
“Are you going to let us in Jethroe or just stand there gaping at us like were dead fish.” Ducky smirked.
“Yea come on in. I just wasn't expecting all of you tonight. I just hope we have enough food.” Gibbs said opening the door and stepping back so they could all come in.
“Boss we have enough for everybody. Hi Tony,Ziva its really good to see you guys. What brings you here?”
“We just wanted to make sure that your ok Tim. Since Gibbs wouldn't tell us whats going on here.” Ziva said.
“ Nothing's going on Ziva. I just needed some recovery time since my accident on the assignment for the Director. Gibbs told me I could stay with him so if I needed anything he would be here to help me. That's all Ziva.” Tim said with certainty in his voice. The doctors took turns with Tim making sure he was doing good while the others helped finish preparing dinner. Questions raced through Tony and Ziva's minds as the other 3 men moved up and down the stairs.
“ Boss I don't understand what happened to McProbie? Why are they making such a fuss over him. He looks fine to me.” Tony asked.
“Yea Gibbs whats up with McGee? What exactly was that special assignment and why the shrink?” Ziva chimed in.
“How do you know one of them is a shrink Ziva? If the director wants you two to know about the assignment he will be the one to tell you. Now lets eat dinner is ready.” Gibbs said setting the platter of steaks on the table just as Jeff and Tim came into the room. Ducky and Paul followed soon after. The conversation was kept light and there were no problems. That is until they were all leaving. Jeff, Paul, Ducky and Ziva hugged Tim goodbye but when Tony went to hug McGee and just as he put his arms around him,
McGee screamed “ Don't touch me Tony, please don't touch me.” as tears fell from the young mans eye's, he ran from the room.
The horrific look on McGee's face crushed Tony. “ What did I do Boss?” the hurt coloring his voice. Before Gibbs could answer Ducky began ushering him out the door.
“ I have to go see to McGee. I will talk to you later Tony. Jeff would you please help me.” Gibbs asked as Jeff came back threw the door as him and Paul had heard McGee's scream.
“I will go talk to him Gibbs. It might be best for you to stay down here for a while I will call you when it's safe to come up?” Jeff said gently.
“Okay.” I will stay down here till you say its safe. The tone and look on Gibbs face telling the young doctor that he didn't like not being there for Tim but that he would do as he was asked.
Gibbs started into the living room “ DiNozzo, David, with me.” he growled as he sat in his easy chair.
Both agents sat in anticipation of what Gibbs would say. Gibbs sat there thinking for awhile until Tony finally broke the silence.
“Boss whats up with Probie? Why did he react that way when I tried to hug him?What the hell happened to my Probie?”
“The answer isn't a very simple on DiNozzo. The mission we were on was a joint operation between us and the FBI. They needed some information and asked if McGee could get it for them and in the process he was caught and tortured for three days. When we got him out he was like just what you saw. Its taken Jeff a long time to help him get through this. You reminded him of one of the men that tortured him. Even though the guy is dead he see's him when someone but the four of us try to touch him. It took him a long time to let me help him, or even touch him. That's why he is staying here. He can't stand to be left alone for more than a couple of minutes and he can't stay at his place because they know where he lives and is afraid that they will come after him. Hence the locking of the doors. This is very hard on Tim. So please don't question him about it, just for once in your life Tony let this go and never bring it up again.” Gibbs spoke softly but the meaning of his words left no room for argument or for breaching the insight.
“If you can't handle this either of you I will transfer you off the team so tell me know?”
“I will not mention it Gibbs.” Ziva said.
“ I promise I won't mention it or tease him about ever Boss. He just looked terrified and it hurt to see him like that. I think of him as my little brother and I can't stand the thought of him being hurt.”
“ I know Tony you and Ziva both think of him as a brother. But this is something that will take time for him to get over. We have to make it as easy as possible.” Gibbs said.
“Gibbs will you come up here. Tim wants to see you?”
Gibbs hurried up the stairs leaving his other two agents downstairs wondering what really was going on and what happened to their friend.
“We need to leave them alone. McGee is in good hands. Tony, Ziva I think we should go now.” Ducky said motioning to the door. They stood to leave when another scream split the silence. Both turned looking up at the closed door. Questions still dancing in their heads.
After finally getting McGee calmed down and into bed Gibbs and Jeff stepped out of the room and down the stairs. Gibbs went into the kitchen to get the three of them a drink, beer wouldn't do for this tonight. He poured them three glasses of bourbon straight. As he entered the living room both men were sitting on the couch where Paul had been sitting since the others left. Hanging his head he sat in his chair. Quietly he asked “ What are we going to do Jeff? I don't understand what brought that on. He is so shattered its like the first time. It breaks my heart. He is such a loving man. How do I deal with this?”
“It's going to take time. He is fragile and for some reason Tony reminded him of one of his attackers. You have to be strong and patient for him Gibbs. I know its hard. When my lover was killed after I was raped I had no one and it tore me apart. I had to be strong and I hurt all the time. If Tim loses you now he won't recover. He will wind up killing himself one way or another or he will lose his sanity all together. Its going to take a lot for him to trust Tony again and most men. Its going to be hard on Tony. I know I could see the love he has for Tim.” Jeff said as he wrapped his arms aroung Gibbs knowing how much the man needed the comfort himself . He wanted to be strong for Tim but he needed strength himself and Jeff's comforting arms gave him the strength he needed right now.
“Thank you Jeff. I needed that and its not easy for me to admit that I hope you know.” Gibbs said.
“ Paul I think it might be best if you and I stay here tonight incase Tim has another incident. What do you think?”
“I think its a good idea and Gibbs there is no arguing. We can sleep in the guest bedroom you need to be close to Tim in case it happens again.” Paul said putting a final note on the conversation. They sat there in silence for a time, when Jeff took Pauls hand and led him to the guest bedroom leaving Gibbs lost in his own thoughts.
“ Jeff do you think Gibbs will be okay? Do you think he can handle it?”
“ I think he has more strength than anyone gives him. He even lost his wife and daughter and survived that. He loves Tim so much this is just overwhelming him a little. He doesn't realize how strong Tim is and how much that young man loves him. It's going to take time. But it will happen.” Jeff said as he kissed his own new lover.
Gibbs sat there for he didn't know how long. He loved Tim so much, he just didn't know how he would get them through this. Finally he got up and went upstairs to bed to be with his lover. Gibbs undressed and slid into bed next to his sleeping young love. He carefully wrapped his arms around him and snuggled close and quickly fell asleep listening to Tim's breathing.
Gibbs didn't know how long he slept when the night was shattered by McGee's ungodly screaming. Gibbs woke to find the young man in the corner naked and screaming his head off.
Just as Gibbs got out of bed the door was thrown open and Jeff and Paul entered naked as well.
“Jethroe don't touch him stay just where you are his is still in the grips of the nightmare. I will need to get through to him. His is seeing his attackers and he can't be woke up by just shaking him or saying his name. If we don't wake him up right it could hurt him. You have heard never wake a sleep walker where there are reasons for that.” Jeff said calmly.
Gibbs watched as the young man gently took McGee in his arms and started whispering in his ear. It took a few minutes but McGee collapsed in Jeff's arms the tears falling uncontrollable. After a few minutes Gibbs was able to take him in his arms and hold him. Finally they managed to get him back into bed and he fell asleep almost instantly. Jeff and Paul went back to bed talking quietly. Gibbs slipped in besides McGee and held him close taking his time to watch the young man sleep. Finally Gibbs fell asleep.
Screams split the night once again. Bringing Gibbs awake and reaching for the empty space were McGee had been. Instead he found him in the corner once again screaming. The horror on his face was heart wrenching. It was a look that would haunt Gibbs for the rest of his life. Jeff and Paul rushed in, Jeff moved over to Tim and his screams increased.
“This is getting worse. He is tearing himself apart.” Jeff thought to himself.
“ Paul get me a sedative and quick before he completely loses it.” Jeff almost screamed to be heard over Tim.
Paul raced out and returned just as quickly with a syringe filled with the sedative.
Paul handed it to Jeff and he quickly jabbed it into McGee's arm. Soon the young man quieted and then the helped him back to bed.
“ Gibbs you need to stay close. This one was bad. I have never seen someone like this. I hate to give him a sedative but he and us need to get some rest.”
“Thank you Jeff.”
Both men left as Jethroe slipped back into bed and wrapped himself around McGee. Jeff threw a look backwards and saw the tears slipping from Gibbs eyes. He knew how much the older mans heart was hurting at seeing his young lover like this. It hurt both of them to see McGee and Gibbs being torn apart like this. When they got to there room Paul turned and took Jeff in his arms seeing his own lovers hurt for the two men. “ I don't know what to do Paul. Tim is tearing himself apart and I can't stop it. Gibbs is hurting so much and I hate to see him hurting like this. He is afraid of losing Tim. Tim is afraid of losing himself and Gibbs. I don't know how much more he can take before his mind shatters.” Jeff said into Paul's ear as they held each other.
“ I think I know someone who can help and they both trust him. Let me call him in the morning. That sedative should keep him sleeping in the more.” Paul explained.
The rest of the night went without a hitch. Gibbs was the first up as usual and had coffee ready for the guest as well as started on breakfast when they cam up for their first cups of coffee.
“I see you slept well Gibbs after it was all over. By the way how was Tim when you got up?” Jeff asked concern in his voice.
“ Jeff he was fine and still sleeping. Thank you both for what you've done for us. I don't know what you gave him last night but at least the nightmares didn't reoccur.
I was able to get some sleep and so was he. He did toss and turn a lot though. I hope you guys were able to get some sleep?” Gibbs said placing their coffee in front of them.
“Gibbs are you alright? Are you starting to second guess this situation? I saw the look on your face last night and it worried me.” Jeff asked.
“ I'm alright just hate to see Tim tearing himself apart and I can't do anything about it. It just hurts to not be able to help him when I want to so bad.”
“ I know I see the hurt in your eyes every time I look at you and you look at him. He is a tough young man. You need to understand that and just have patience and be there for him.” Jeff said.
“I know it's just that I feel so helpless and I am not used to feeling like this. I want to do more I just don't know what to do.” Gibbs almost pleaded.
“ We may have the answer. I need to make a couple of calls and then we will know. I thought I would wait to see how he is doing before I make them though.” Paul interjected.
Gibbs was about to say something when McGee walked into the room.
“He who? What are you guys plotting this early in the morning. Boss can I have a cup of that coffee?” McGee said as he yawned.
“We were talking about you Tim. How are you doing this morning.” Paul asked as McGee took a seat and a cup of coffeee.
“I slept great last night. Why do you ask?” Tim said glancing at the worried looks on their faces.
“ What do you remember about last night?” Jeff asked.
“ Nothing I slept fine. Why what happened.”
“Nothing happened. Just thought I would ask.” Jeff said.
“Paul can I see you in the bedroom for a minute?”
“Sure be there in a second.”
Paul got up and followed Jeff out of the room. Gibbs glanced at Tim's face. The young man was always easy to read but this morning he showed no emotion just like he didn't remember the nightmares.
“Tim are your really alright?”
“ Yea Boss. I'm fine. Just need a shower and a shave. When do I get to go back to work anyway? I miss everybody. I'm tired of doing nothing I want to work.” Tim whined.
Gibbs had to smile at the young man. “ Tim why are you calling me Boss here. You haven't done that in a long time. Why now? Did you sleep okay last night.”
“ I slept fine. Did you Boss? Did something happen last night I don't remember? Why wouldn't I call you Boss anyway? Its not like we are sleeping together is it?”
Gibbs felt his heart sink and his face fall. “ No Tim were not sleeping together and you don't have to call me Boss in my own home. You can call me Jethroe. No nothing happened out of the ordinary.” Gibbs tried hard to control his emotions as a single tear slid down his cheek.
“Tim can you go see Jeff in the bedroom for a couple of minutes. He needs to talk to you.” Paul asked entering the room.
“ Sure Paul is something wrong?”
“No he just wants to talk to you in private.”
“Okay.” Tim said as he left the room.
Paul saw the look on Gibbs face and came around the table and hugged Gibbs. Whispering in his ear he asked, “What is it Jethroe? Whats happened?”
“He doesnt even remember that we are together and that we have been sharing my bed. He doesn't remember that he calls me Gibbs or Jethroe. I've lost him Paul what am I going to do now?” Gibbs cried as he held onto the younger man. They held onto each other till they heard McGee enter the room.
“ Is everything alright Jethroe? Why are you crying?” Tim asked worry tinging his voice.
Gibbs pulled the younger man into an embrace and nuzzled his ear. “ It's because I love you Tim and I don't want to lose you. I thought I had lost you there for a minute.”
“Why would you think that Jethroe?”
“Because you didn't remember that we share a bed and have been sharing our lives for almost a month now. That you call me Jethroe or Gibbs when we are at home, not Boss.”
“Why would I not remember sleeping with you Jethroe much less the fact that I love you more than life?”
“I don't know. I am just glad your back, Tim.”
“Jethroe you should know I am never going to leave you.”
Gibbs broke the embrace just enough to kiss his young lover ever so gently.
Author's Chapter Notes:
McGee is home with Gibbs now the true test begins.