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Author's Chapter Notes:
Tony finally talks with Gibbs
Chapter Five--"Like A Shotgun Needs An Outcome"

Leroy Jethro Gibbs foot slammed down on the gas.

They were headed to a crime scene outside of city limits.

His driving was making due record time.

Special Agent Tim McGee ralfed in the back seat.

He smiled.

"Gibbs?!" Agent Todd called out and nearly fell over.

An impressive feat to accomplish with a seatbelt on.

He made another sharp turn.

She screamed and clung on for dear life.


Jethro heard a knock at his front door.

The only person crazy enough to do that at 2 a.m was Anthony DiNozzo.

The door opened.

"Boss," his eyes pleaded. "We need to talk."


He handed the younger field agent a beer as he sanded his mark onto Gibbs boat.

"Thanks Boss," Tony accepted the cool beverage graciously. "I've been meaning to talk to you about this for awhile now."

Jethro leaned back casually, "Have you?"

"Yeah..." Tony almost looked ashamed. He took a moment before continuing, "I just talked with Probie. He seems to think I bottle away all my emotions."

A half-hearted chuckle drenched in worry.

Gibbs tried not to pick up his phone and fire McGee's ass right this second.

"So!" He leaned forwards, clapping his hands awkwardly, "Time to come clean."

Jethro just listened.

"My life...was not...a cakewalk Boss. It had its up and downs but mostly it was a pile of poo," Tony crinkled his nose at the thought. "My dad was always away on business trips, my mother used to dress me up as a sailor and lock me in a dark room with a canopy bed full of vampires. She drank my sea monkeys because she thought it was her mint julep." Then he out right laughed, "She was off her rocker Boss! Doctors diagnosed her with acute paranoia. She spent half her time acting unbelievably insane and the other drinking away the liquor cabinet!"

DiNozzo apparently thought it was funny.

"When she took her meds we got along swell. But it's not like I had any opportunity to see her! Senior kept shipping me off to boarding school after boarding school. Right before she died I used to watch movies with her. Mom did love the good ol' black and whites." Tony smiled.

"What happened?" Gibbs asked.

"She got sick," he said. "And I don't mean mental deterioration. Senior brought her back from Spain one year and that was it. That's when we knew. The doctors said she couldn't make it for much longer."

They sat in silence.

After a few minutes Tony finally said, "To be honest be both kinda lost it after that. Senior and I. Her dying just...sent us down a dark hole neither of us could get out of." His eyes looked troubled.

"Did he...?" (lay a hand on you?)


"How rough?"

Tony's frame shook a little.

It answered his question.

"I got what I always wanted though. Senior finally acknowledged my existence. Just not in the way I had hoped."

Both seemed lost in different worlds when Gibbs finally stood to his achy knees and said, "Lets go."

Tony jumped up in eager curiosity, "Where are we going, Boss?"

"Back to the source DiNozzo."

"Long Island?"



The boxing ring.

Of course.

Tony stepped back into the ring, both he and Gibbs wearing their designated gym clothing.

It was pitch black except for the one blinding light above them.

You could see a man's sweat and fear this way.

("Get ooofff!" Tony wailed.

"Then stop moving!")

He exhaled shakily at the memory.

Not Anthony D. DiNozzo's finest moment.

Gibbs stepped in front of him, patting blue gloves. "You ready?"

It's not fear that's the problem.

It's what you do with it, he reminded himself.

Calm down.

Take a deep breath.

Tony looked up a whole new man, eyes dark and determined.


Gibbs gestured towards himself, "Hit me."

He swung.

The ex-marine grabbed Tony's arm and bent it behind his back.

"AH! Uncle! Uncle, Boss."

"Nope. Not what I wanna hear DiNozzo," Jethro released him.

The kid nodded, starting to bounce up and down. Ready to fight back.

Gibbs smiled shaking his head, teeth showing.

Taught him well.

Tony watched him carefully, moving around in circles.

Red gloves guarded his face.

After letting him get a few good scuffs in, Jethro threw him to the ground.

His senior field agent looked positively rattled.

He thought Tony was too shook up to attack but he did.

A long leg swung out sending Gibbs to the mat on top of him.

A punch hit him square in the face.

Gibbs saw stars.

On instinct, he threw his fists into DiNozzo's rib cage.

Which knocked the breath out of him.

Tony wheezed and his entire frame began to tremble.

Gibbs knew the younger man was quickly veering into a traumatic memory lane.

He had to stop it.

"DiNozzo!" No reply. He smacked him across the head, "Hey! DiNozzo!"

Tony eyes went wild.

He didn't understand...

How could he take on killer after killer and come out on the other end of each fight totally and completely fine?

Why now?

Why had it all started 10 years later?

He felt paralyzed whenever Gibbs attacked him.

Then it finally dawned on him.

...it was Gibbs.

His boss was the trigger.

Suddenly he saw Senior sitting on top of him, hitting him into submission.


He tried to crawl away.

He tried to do anything but lie there and pathetically take a beating.

Oh God!

Tears fell from his eyes to his ears.

Please PLEASE stop! He mentally begged.

Gibbs got off of him.

The whole situation seemed achingly familiar.

Tony felt startled when he was pulled into a hug.

It snapped him back to reality.


Jethro just uncharacteristically held the younger man and rocked him back in forth.

Tony, uncertain how he felt about what was happening, just let himself melt into it.

Green eyes still wild.

Neither of them spoke.

And they didn't have to.

Whatever problems they faced they could fix together.

Tony just needed to confront his demons.


(Long Island, New York)

Thunder rumbled as rain splattered down on the Long Island grave yard.

Grey clouds completely filled the sky.

Tony stepped forwards and placed a bouquet of pink flowers on his mothers grave.

He read the engraved description on her headstone: Elizabeth Mary DiNozzo Born: April 1st 1946 Died: October 8th 1978

Swallowing thickly, he tried not to remember her last moment with him, but all the best ones they had together.

James Bond...

Boy did she love that guy.

Not nearly as much as she loved John Wayne but who could honestly compare the two?

Tony knelt down on his haunches staring silently.

Full of regret that they never had the relationship he would of liked them to.

Then again, it was the best it could've been considering the circumstances.

Her being crazy and Little Anthony Dinozzo being gone all the time.

Rain pelted his styled mane until laid flat against his forehead.

He couldn't honestly remember the last time he had been in Long Island.

But it had been a VERY long time.

Perhaps when he got sent to the Rhode Island Military Academy at age 15.

Tony let out a long, cathartic exhale.

The past couldn't be changed, but there were second chances.

Chances that people got every single second of every single day.

Chances people often overlooked with their obsession of the future or past.

Gibbs had helped him get over a stumbling block in his career and personal life.

Panic attacks weren't really useful out on the field.

McNosy-McProbie had tried to help the other night in the elevator but his people skills could really use some work.

His problems weren't a computer virus.

Violence couldn't fix it.

Pills couldn't fix it.

Time obviously did squat for him.

Maybe Gibbs and the others could be what he needed to move on.

Put in some roots and become apart of a family for once.

This lone wolf thing put a damper on the whole team effort Gibbs had going.

He was only 33 after all.

He could change.

Tony smiled wide.

He flipped a umbrella open when his cell phone rang.

"Very Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, how may I direct your call?"


"Abby?" He frowned, the goth sounded very worried.

Actually she sounded terrified.


He cringed and pulled the phone back away from his ear abit, "Abby, Gibbs gave me the rest of the day off--"

"GIBBS ISN'T ANSWERING MY CALLS TONY," She explained. "Gibbs ALWAYS picks up. Rule number 3!"

"--Always be available," he mumbled, thoughts racing. "Okay, Abby, just calm down, have you tried getting a hold of McGee or K--"

"NO! They were with him and their not picking up either, you have to come back NOW Tony!"

He was already walking back to his rental, keys in hand. "How long have they been missing Abby?"

"Since 11 o clock this morning. They left to go solve a case with a real-life Hannibal Lector and--"

"Whoa Whoa Abs! Hannibal Lector?" Tony's heart flew out and stopped dead.

The forensic scientist voice trembled over the line, "Tony...I think Gibbs, Kate and McGee were kidnapped by a real life cannibal."


Then, "I'm on my way."
Chapter End Notes:
Man...it's been weeks since I updated. I feel really bad about that but been busy. Life waits for no one. If anything needs to be fixed or edited let me know.
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