GIBBS' POV
Gibbs could hear the words that were coming out of his mouth. He knew
what he was saying, had planned it out. He couldn't look at Jenny
during any of it. It hurt him too much to be doing what he was doing,
but he knew he had to do it, or he thought he had to. He couldn't
move; he wouldn't let them take care of him. He would need a lot of
care and that was just not fair to them.
He was fighting back the tears as he said the words. He'd picked them
because he knew it was the only way to get Tony away from him and mad
at him. He wouldn't let Tony be saddled with him. He'd lost the
ability to walk and have feeling below the waist. He didn't know if
he would ever get it back, and that was just not something he would
let a young man like Tony have to deal with. He had a newborn, as
well as Jenny, to take care of and that was enough work for the both
of them. Now he would be something that needed to be cared for. He
just would not do it.
He listened to what Jenny had to say, and that stung him to the core.
How could he. No, he could; he had to stay strong. He couldn't have
his family saddled with his problems; they were his, and he had to
deal. He would, too. He could get his house easily wheelchair
accessible since when they adopted Matt they had started construction
on the house. They were having a large room added on the first floor
that he could turn into a bedroom and make it the master bedroom, and
then he was having two more rooms added upstairs, not that he needed
them now. He would also have the indoor heated pool now. Or he could
have that just stopped. Then there was the barn he was having built
to put the boat out in and he could work out there. Getting a walkway
paved wouldn't be hard.
Gibbs had to think like that to make sure he didn't crack when Jenny
said what she said. Then Tony walked out, and a tear rolled down his
face. Gibbs hit the morphine drip button; he just didn't want to
feel. He couldn't let himself feel. He'd just ripped out his own
heart and thrown it out the window, not to mention his lover's and
their little girl's.
"You know that was wrong, right, Lee?"
Gibbs turned his head and was now looking at Mark Walker, the only
other man he'd ever had sex with. Gibbs had loved him but had known
it would never have worked and they had gone their separate ways, and
Gibbs tried to forget and married three ex-wives.
"Mark."
"Lee, why did you just do that? You loved him more then you've ever
loved anyone in your life, save maybe Megan."
"Mark, I can't have him or them take care of me and be a burden on
them. You know I can't."
"I know that you loved him and you meant what you said to him on that
porch not so long ago. It's what lovers do, Lee."
For some reason Gibbs didn't even question that his ex-lover was
standing in the room, the only person who ever used the name Leroy
besides his mother and grandmother.
"He's young, he'll snap back." Gibbs tried to put on the ice-face.
"Cut the shit, Lee, you know that's not true. You just killed a part
of the boy."
"Mark, I had to."
"No, you didn't, but sadly you just can't see that. You know, I'm
glad that I died, Lee, since I would kick your ass if I was still
alive."
"Mark, I can't have him taking care of two of us."
"Don't you think he has that choice, not you, Jethro?"
Gibbs turned and saw his first wife walk into the room.
"Susan, I-"
"No, Jethro, you fucked up your life but good. You let your job get
in the way. That man you gave up the job, the corp for, the man you
made a life with."
"You did, Poppy."
Gibbs turned to were Mark was standing and saw Megan sitting on foot
of the bed now.
"Angel, how can I let him look after me and Matt and Jenny? I'll be
as much of a baby as Matt."
"Because it's like you and Mommy said, love is forever. Well, it
should be at least. You still love me."
"Everyday and forever, Angel."
"Then think about what you just did to that little girl, who I might
say I am happy that you found her and look after her."
Gibbs was in tears now, not really thinking straight. His daughter
faded from view. Gibbs just started crying harder.
"Fore."
Gibbs' head snapped around at the new female voice.
"Sharon."
"You know, I should hit you again with this golf club."
"Not you, too."
"Hell, yes, me, too. Leroy Jethro Gibbs, when will you learn? You
keep pushing people away and they might not ever come back. If I was
that young man I would never want to see you again."
"She's right, you know."
Gibbs saw his last wife standing next to his second wife.
"I wanted to kill you when I learned about Jen Sheppard, and thank
you, she was such a pain. Gibbs, you never could let people close,
and now that you have you fuck it up like you fuck up everything else
in your life." The lady walked over and put her hand on Gibbs'
forehead, pushing the hair up and making it neat. Or that's what
Gibbs felt.
"Jethro, you should pick up the phone and get him back. I wouldn't
want to, but you need to. He completes you, Jethro. You know I've
never been a fan of your relationships, but I'm happy for you that
you finally found what you were looking for all this time."
"Sherry, how could I get him back? He never wants to see me again. I
could see it in his face."
"And you don't think that he should feel like that, Boss?" The lady
in front of him was no longer his wife but now Cait Todd.
"Oh, Cait, I'm so sorry."
"For what, Gibbs? For my death? I don't think this is the time nor
the place for that. Right now you're the reason I'm here."
"Oh, Cait, why do I just keep fucking it up? Everything I touch just
turns to crap."
The image slapped him. Gibbs felt the sting.
"You are such an ass. Damn that felt good. That isn't true, Gibbs.
You won custody of that lovely little girl. You now have a son as
well, and you have a great man to share that with."
"Cait, you of all people know that I-"
"Know that you suck at this, yes, know that you do not want to put
anyone out, know that you think that doing this is protecting him.
Damn it, Boss, you know that is all a bunch of shit to make you feel
better for doing what you did to the poor boy. I agree with Mark, if
I was alive I would be here and kick your ass. Tony was the best
thing that you ever did. Gibbs, you need to fix this and I mean NOW,
before something stupid happens."
Gibbs had not noticed the time. It was about three and a half hours
since Tony and the kids had left. They had gotten to the hospital
about 7:00 AM and now it was like 10:30. Gibbs looked up and heard
Ducky yelling at the nurse for not calling him first thing, then he
turned and stormed into the room. It was obviously raining since
Ducky was carrying an umbrella that was wet.
"What the bloody hell are you doing, fucking things up?"
"Ducky," Gibbs almost whispered.
"Do not Ducky me, young man. Imagine my surprise when I woke up and
turned on my cell phone this morning and I found a voicemail from a
scared and crying little girl, telling me and begging me to come to
help her since her Daddy had just said mean and evil words that she
was not allowed to say and that her other Dad was in the bathroom,
locked in there for over two hours now, and the baby has been crying
for about an hour."
"Oh, God."
"Oh, God, is that all you can bloody say? I have a right mind to
thrash you with this umbrella."
"Go ahead, I deserve it."
"You're damn right you deserve it. What the hell did you say to him?"
"I, well, never mind, it's over."
"Oh, no, it is not over. You WILL fix this, Jethro. I will not watch
you kill that man. You took out his heart and destroyed that man. I
could tell by that innocent little girl crying for my help. How could
you? After all you have been through, and you go and do this to him.
What gives you the right? You didn't even think what he might want. I
guess you never cared a damn about him."
"How the fuck can you say those things to him?" A pregnant Abby was
now storming into the room.
Ducky stopped his tirade and let a hormonal Abby have her piece of
him.
"I do not even know why I'm here. I should be helping that little
girl trying to get Tony out of the bathroom, if he is still even
alive. How can you even do that to him?"
It hit Gibbs. Tony might do that. No, he wouldn't. He couldn't. The
kids, they were Tony's world. No, he was Tony's world.
"That man worshiped the ground you walked on. I cannot believe you
would push him away like that."
"Abby, relax."
"No, McGee, he fucked up, my friend. I won't let anyone do that to
Tony, not even Leroy Jethro Gibbs, the same man that stood in front
of a bullet for his daughter."
"Gibbs, how could you?" Ziva was now working on him. She went off for
about five minutes before Abby's cell phone went off.
"Yes?What?Damn him, I'll kill him. He is so not worth that." Abby
shut the phone. "You fucking ass. I can't believe you did this to
him. He might lose the kids now because of you."
"Abigail, what happened?"
"Tony was in the bathroom with a gun," she said and stormed out of
the room, going to her car. She was in the elevator before Ducky
could form words.
"Timothy, go with her. She might not be able to drive in her
condition." Ducky shot a look of death that made even Gibbs look
tame.
Tim found Abby kicking the car tire.
"Damn it, the fucking car. It's all your fault." Abby was crying and
kicking the tire. The front door was open.
"Abs."
"Tim, Tony was going to kill himself."
"We don't know that." Tim was holding his lover and mother of two of
his four children.
"Yes, we do. Director Morrow barged into the bathroom and Tony was
bringing the gun up to his head and it went off."
"Oh, God, is he hurt?"
"Just scared. Now he's packing his clothing and Jenny's stuff and
leaving the house."
"Why?"
Abby couldn't finish her words. She was nuzzled into Tim and crying.
"Okay, get in. I'll drive you there, and we can see about fixing
this."
"No. Gibbs is fixing this. Or I am going to kill him myself. He had
no right."
They got into the car and started driving to the house.
"Well, I guess he just didn't want to burden Tony."
"Damn it, McGee, that's not an excuse. They love each other. I would
do it for you."
"I know and me for you, but Abby, this is Gibbs."
"And that matters why, McGee? No, it doesn't, not at all. He is a
fucking bastard, but Tony has a say in this as well."
They drove the rest of the way in silence.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
JENNY'S POV
"You're mean. That word is bad, and you know it. You told dad that
you loved him forever, till death do us part. That is what you said.
I was there. You lied! You're mean!" Jenny ran out of the room and
was in the hall being consoled by a nurse when her dad and Matt came
out of the room. Her dad took her hand and they went to the car. Tony
secured them in the SUV and drove them home.
Jenny was crying the whole way home. Matt was quiet in the car.
Riding always put him to sleep. Tony, Jenny couldn't tell but knew he
was crying just the same. Once they got home, Tony walked Matt to his
room and then walked down to get Jenny a fruit snack and a drink box.
He walked Jenny up to her room, then her dad left. She just stayed in
her room, crying in her bed.
After about an hour her throat was sore and dry. She drank the fruit
drink and ate her snacks. She then went on her computer and emailed
Abby about what had happened. Jenny didn't know if she would get it,
being at the hotel and not at home. She didn't know if Abby had a
computer with her. After typing everything that her Daddy had said to
her and Dad, she head Matt crying. She didn't worry about it; her Dad
would take care of him in a few moments. She didn't know that her Dad
was still locked in the bathroom.
After about an hour of Matt crying, she walked down and was trying to
make Matt stop fussing. She wasn't allowed to pick him up without an
adult nearby, so she didn't want to get grounded for picking him up.
So she walked around the house looking for her dad. After looking
everyplace except the basement, again she wasn't allowed down there
without an adult, she walked back to the locked bathroom door. She
kept knocking on it. After about two hours of Matt crying she walked
down and went to her phone list next to the phone. It had been put
there after they had won custody of the little girl. It started with
Gibbs phone and worked its way down to Tom Morrow and Jimmy Palmer.
"Daddy, come home. Dad has locked himself in the bathroom and Matt
has been crying for a long time. Come home and fix this like you fix
everything. Please, Daddy, don't be mad at Dad."
Jenny was almost in tears. The next person was Tony. She knew he
wouldn't hear it, being that his phone was right there in front of
her. The next number was Abby. She called and it went to voicemail.
Jenny explained what had happened at the hospital and then what was
happening at the house. She did this with everyone, then the last
number on the phone list was Director Tom Morrow. She dialed it.
"Hello?"
"Hello, Mr. Morrow, sir."
"Jenny, is that you?"
"Yes, sir. Something is wrong with my Dad. See, Daddy said bad words
to him and made Dad cry, and now Matt's been crying for a long time,
and Dad is locked in the bathroom."
"Jenny, honey, where are you? Are you still in Baltimore?"
"No, sir, Mr. Morrow, sir, we're at home."
"Okay, here is what I'm going to do. I'm going to hand you to Jimmy.
I need you to tell him the words that Jethro said to you both and we
will be driving there right now, okay? Everything will be okay."
"I'm not allowed to say the bad word that Daddy used. It was very
bad. He told me about what Dad is."
"Okay, but I think you need to tell Jimmy. It will be okay, you won't
get into trouble."
"But I'm not allowed."
"I know, honey, but we need to know so we can fix this."
"Okay."
Jimmy got on the phone "Ok, honey, what did your daddy say?"
"He called Dad a-" Jenny stopped again. She didn't want to say the
words she was told were bad and not get in trouble, but she knew that
they needed to know. She had already told Abby and kind of told
Ducky, just not using the words.
"It's okay, honey, really you won't get into trouble."
"He called Dad a sissy."
"Okay, a sissy, not good."
"He also called him a faggot."
"Okay, faggot. Anything else, honey?"
"Something about being a toy."
"A toy. Okay, was there anything else?"
"Just that he never wanted to see him again."
"Okay, honey, we're almost there. Do you know why Matt is crying?"
"No, sir. He doesn't smell, maybe he's hungry."
"Okay, honey, we're turning in now, okay?"
Jenny looked out the window and saw the car pull up. Both men walked
into the house with their son, Tommy.
"Okay, honey, you help Jimmy with Matt, and I'll check on your dad."
"I want to help you."
Tom went down to her level. "I know, honey, but Jimmy doesn't know
where anything is, and he'll need help with that. After we get your
dad, you can help, okay?"
"Okay."
"Stay down here. I'll go get Matt and bring him down, okay?"
Jenny stayed with Jimmy and their little boy. Tom got Matt and
brought him down. Jenny and Jimmy went into the kitchen. Matt was wet.
"Okay, honey, where do you keep diapers?"
"In here."
Jenny walked to the cabinet in the living room and got a diaper and
walked back to Jimmy and Tommy. Tommy was sitting at the table eating
a fruit snack.
"Good. Now, do you know where a bottle might be? I didn't see any in
the fridge."
"Well, in there." Jenny pointed to the glass cabinet and then went
and got the formula off the microwave cart when she heard a crash and
then a loud bang.
"What? DAD!" Jenny ran out of the room.
"Honey, no, come back!" Jimmy picked up Matt. "Tommy, stay here,
okay?"
"Okay, Daddy."
Jenny ran into the bathroom and saw Tom blocking her Dad.
"Dad, are you okay?" Jenny saw what she could only think was blood on
the floor. She ran in.
Tom's head spun around. He's been expecting the little girl. "Your
dad is fine, honey. He just slipped and cut himself."
Jenny saw a naked Tony on the bathroom floor in front of the
tub. "Dad."
Tony looked up and a light went off in his head. "Hey, Peanut, what's
up?"
"Dad, you're bleeding."
"Oh, it's nothing, I just cut myself."
"Why?"
"I was shaving and dropped the blade and it hit my arm. It's nothing
to worry about. Now, how about you and Jimmy go down and start to
make some lunch for all of us while Tom and I clean up the mess,
okay?"
"Dad, are you okay?"
"Yes, Peanut, I'm fine."
Jenny knew her Dad was lying to her, but she hugged him anyway. She
didn't see the gun since Tom had put it in his coat pocket, then
moved it to the drawer in time before the little girl could get up
there. Tony only used one arm since he didn't want to get blood on
his daughter. Jimmy and Jenny went back and found Tommy still at the
kitchen table.
"See, Daddy, I stayed like you said."
"That's a good boy. Now, what would you like for lunch? How about
some grilled cheese sandwiches?"
"Yup," Jenny said. "Can I make the soup? My Daddy lets me make the
soup."
"What soup, honey?"
"Tomato. It's in the cupboard." Jenny walked over to the large wall
unit and grabbed two cans and showed them to Jimmy.
"Okay, but Tommy doesn't like tomatoes, so none for him, okay?"
"Okay."
"Daddy, can I help, please?" Tommy asked Jimmy.
"Sure. How about you hand me the cheese? Have Jenny show you where it
is."
Jenny put the cans on the counter. Jimmy opened them while Jenny
showed Tommy where the cheese was. She also got out the bread and
butter. Jimmy found the frying pan, but Jenny corrected him and he
got the griddle that Gibbs had on top of the cabinets in a little
space up there and started warming it up.
"Okay, Peanut, see, all better." Tony was coming down the
stairs. "But before we eat, you need to go up and pack a few things."
"Why?"
"Jethro wants us out of the house."
"Tony, be real. You know-"
"No, Tom, he said it and I'm leaving, so come on, Jenny, let's get a
few things and then we can have my friend pack up everything that is
ours tomorrow."
Jenny walked upstairs with her dad. "Dad, but I don't want to leave."
"Yes, you will. We'll find a better house, and you, me and Matt will
live together, maybe even have Abby and them live with us."
"But I want to stay with Daddy."
"Well, honey, Daddy doesn't want us anymore."
"Why not?" she asked as she took the clothing Tony was handing her.
"He is a-" Tony stopped. "Well, he is sick and doesn't want us around
anymore."
"He doesn't love us anymore."
"Nope, I guess he never really did."
"That's a lie! He said he never says things he doesn't mean, and he
said he loved us."
Jenny was bawling on her bed now. Tony was sitting next to her. He
had a short sleeve shirt on, and on one arm there was a bandage that
was slightly red at the top but not that bad.
"Hey, anyone up there?"
"Abby, what are you doing here?"
Abby saw his arm, then shot him a look. He didn't meet the gaze.
"Hey, half pint, how about you go down and eat your sandwich? Your
dad and I need to talk. Tim is down there now as well."
"Okay, Aunt Abby. Do we really have to move?"
"No, honey, you will NOT be moving anytime soon."
"Abby, you don't know-"
"Shut it up, you! Do not even start this. I am so kicking your butt."
"Be nice to him, Aunt Abby," Jenny said, defending her Dad. "Daddy
was mean already."
"I know, honey. I won't hurt him anymore than your Daddy already has."
Jenny got off the bed and was hugged by Abby when she got to her.
"Does Daddy really not love us?"
"No, honey, he loves you very much. That is why he said what he said.
He is scared, that's all. Trust me, before the day is out, we will
see your daddy, and he will say he's sorry, okay?"
"He will fix it? He always fixes it."
"Yes, he will."
"Like hell am I seeing that bastard ever again," Tony gritted out.
"You zip it. I'm about to kick your ass now."
"No, I'm out of here."
Tony walked past Abby but didn't get past Tim at the bottom of the
stairs. He tried but Tim had started working out and Tony was in his
room now on the bed with an arm behind his back. Abby and Jenny
walked down the stairs and she saw Tim holding her Dad down.
"Don't hurt him, Uncle Tim. He isn't-"
"Okay, honey. Go and see about lunch."
"Just be nice and no yelling."
"We promise, honey."
Jenny walked back down to the kitchen.
"Hi, honey, just in time," Tom said, seating Jenny at the table.
Jimmy put a sandwich on the table in front of her. Jenny ate the food
and she wasn't really talking, trying to listen to what was going on
up in the bedroom, but she couldn't hear anything.
After eating lunch Jenny and Tommy went into the living room and were
watching a movie. Tommy was sitting next to Jenny. Jimmy was in the
room watching the movie with them as Tom cleaned up the kitchen.
Jenny's head spun around when she heard her Dad and her Aunt and
Uncle come down the stairs.
"Okay, honey, let's get a jacket on you."
"Where are we going, Uncle Tim?"
"To see your daddy."
"Dad, are you okay?"
"Fine."
Tony was being nice, but Abby could feel the acid in the word and
slapped him upside the head. Jenny started to giggle. That made Tony
happy if nothing else did. Tim and Jenny with Tony in tow went out to
the SUV. Abby had Matt in her arms after a moment of talking to Tom
and telling him what the deal was and what was going on. They drove
to the hospital in Baltimore but no one said a word. Matt was passed
out shortly after starting their trip. Tim had put the suitcases in
the back already.
They got to the hospital and they went up to the floor where Gibbs
was.
"Well, hello, my dear. It's good to see you again," the Scottish man
said.
"Hi, Ducky."
"We're going to let your fathers talk for a moment, okay?"
"But I want to see my Daddy."
"I know, honey, but I think they need to talk first. From what your
Daddy told me he needs to say a few things first, okay?"
Jenny looked at Tony, who turned around and went to the ground. "It's
okay, Peanut, just give me a moment, then we're going home."
Abby shot him a look that said like hell with her lover, Ziva, right
next to her shooting the same look.
Tony hugged his daughter and handed Matt to Tim and walked in but
didn't leave the doorway and just shut the door.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
TONY'S POV
Tony and the family were the first to the hospital like everyday.
They walked in and the nurse told them that Gibbs had woken up
sometime in the middle of the night. This made them all happy.
They walked into the room, Jenny holding his hand as Tony sat in the
chair and they took their vigil. Tony felt the hand respond for the
first time since before they were in this whole mess. Gibbs woke up
slowly. Looking at the little girl he smiled then went stone- faced.
He then looked at Tony.
"Hey, Baby."
"You fucking faggot, you did this to me."
Tony let go of the hand from the shock of the word. "What?"
"You heard me, faggot. Get the fuck out. You are nothing to me."
"Daddy, that's not nice to say."
Gibbs couldn't say anything to the little girl. He'd hurt Tony enough
and this would kill Jenny enough.
Tony looked dumbfounded, just sitting there.
"You deaf? I said get the fuck out, you piece of shit. The director
was right. You were nothing but a boy toy and look what fucking
happened. Now get the fuck out, and I expect you out of the house by
the time I get out of this hospital."
Tony was in tears.
"Cry, you fucking sissy, it is what your kind does." Gibbs hurt with
every word he said.
Tony heart at that moment broke as did Gibbs'. The nurse came in from
when Gibbs hit the call button and Gibbs was now yelling.
"Sir!"
"Get them the fuck out of here and off my visitor list! I never want
to see him again."
"You're mean. That word is bad, and you know it. You told Dad that
you loved him forever, till death do us part. That's what you said, I
was there. You lied! You're mean!" Jenny ran out of the room.
"Fine, I see," was all Tony could say, and he walked out of the room.
He found Jenny at the nurses' station being comforted by one of the
nurses.
"Sir, he is just adjusting."
"No, he meant it, I could tell. The bastard that he is never says
what he doesn't mean. Come on, Peanut, we're going home."
Tony took them home, put Matt to bed and got Jenny a fruit snack and
a drink box, left it in her room and then walked to his room. He just
sat on the bed a moment, next to Matt, still in a fog. He felt like
shit. He didn't want to feel again. He got up and went to the gun
case. He unlocked the safe and took out Gibbs' backup revolver. He
went into the bathroom and locked the door. He first took off his
shirt, then he took off the rest of his clothing and sat on the floor
in front of the tub.
He was crying. He hated feeling like this. He hadn't felt like this
since he'd been in college. He'd never wanted to feel like that
again. It had been a dark time for him. Tony then knew what he had to
do. He got up and found Gibbs' razor. He had a straight razor. He
then went back to the floor.
`No, I can't do it again,' Tony thought, looking at the razor. `But
it helped me then. It hurts but this hurts more,' Tony was thinking.
With that Tony picked up the razor and started making small slices in
his arm. He was watching it cut his skin and then the blood forming.
It hurt like hell but it took away the other pain. He made four cuts
in himself to forget the pain of what Gibbs had said to him.
"You know that doesn't really help."
Tony looked up and saw Cait Todd in front of him. "Fuck you. What do
you know, you're dead?"
"Fuck me? Well, fuck you, Tony. What the hell? You have two great
children and a great man."
"Oh, yeah, he's so great. He's a fucking ass."
"You knew going in that he was a bastard."
"No, Cait, he went well beyond that part now."
"And it's reason to think about doing what you're thinking about
doing?"
"I just want the hurt to go away."
"And killing yourself and cutting yourself will do that?"
"Yes."
"Tony, look, what will happen to Matt and Jenny?"
"Gibbs will look after them. Now that I'm gone he will love them
again. It's me he's mad at, not them."
"That's a bunch of bull, and you know it."
"No, Cait, it isn't." Tony made another small cut on himself.
"You know you are almost as stubborn as he is."
Tony was in tears from the physical pain and the emotional
pain. "Just go away, Cait."
"Sorry, Tony, I can't do that. You're a friend, and I can't stand to
see you hurt."
"Like you're even here. You're just a figment of my imagination."
Tony sat there watching the blood slowly leave his body. It wasn't
flowing but instead was a slow stream of blood, not enough to die
from blood loss but enough to cover his body.
Tony didn't hear the baby crying. After a while he put the razor down
and picked up the gun.
"Put the gun down, Tony. What's the point? It won't solve anything."
"It will solve everything, Cait. He'll want the kids, and I won't be
around any longer."
"Have you thought about what that might do to that little girl?
She's already lost one parent. She shouldn't have to lose another
from stupidity and stubbornness."
Tony didn't hear the soft knock on the bathroom door. He was now
holding the gun and thinking about pulling the trigger.
He was bringing the gun up to his head and was about halfway there
when the bathroom door was busted open. Tony's head moved, and he saw
Tom Morrow, and Tony pulled the trigger from being startled. The gun
went off in the ceiling, and Tom ran over, grabbed the gun and put
the gun in his coat pocket.
Jenny didn't see the gun since Tom had taken it out of his pocket and
put it in the drawer in time before the little girl could get up
there. Tony only used one arm since he didn't want to get blood on
his daughter.
After Jenny and Jimmy left, Tom said, "What the fuck were you
thinking, DiNozzo?"
"Nothing."
"You're full of shit. Now let's get you cleaned up and back
downstairs. That little girl is scared shitless."
Tom helped Tony up and into the shower. While Tony was in washing the
blood off himself, Tom cleaned up the floor. When Tony got out Tom
had bandages and gauze for his arm. After cleaning the arm, Tony put
on a pair of jeans and a shirt. While Tony was in the shower, Tom
called Abby and told her what had happened.
"Okay, Peanut, see, all better." Tony was coming down the
stairs. "But before we eat you need to go up and pack a few things."
"Why?"
"Jethro wants us out of the house."
"Tony, be real, you know-"
"No, Tom, he said it, and I'm leaving, so come on, Jenny, let's get a
few things and then we can have my friend pack up everything that is
ours tomorrow."
Jenny walked up with her Dad. "Dad, but I don't want to leave."
"Yes, you will. We'll find a better house, and you, me and Matt will
live together. Maybe we'll even have Abby and them live with us."
"But I want to stay with Daddy."
"Well, honey, Daddy doesn't want us anymore."
"Why not?" Jenny asked as Tony was handing her some clothing.
"He is a-" Tony stopped. "Well, he's just sick and doesn't want us
around anymore."
"He doesn't love us anymore?"
"Nope, I guess he never really did."
"That's a lie! He said he never says things he doesn't mean, and he
said he loved us."
Jenny was bawling on her bed now, Tony sitting next to her. He had a
short sleeve shirt on and on one arm there was a bandage that was
slightly red at the top but not that bad.
"Hey, anyone up there?"
"Abby, what are you doing here?"
Abby saw his arm, then shot him a look. He didn't meet the gaze.
"Hey, half pint, how about you go down and eat your sandwich? Your
Dad and I need to talk. Tim is down there now as well."
"Okay, Aunt Abby. Do we really have to move?"
"No, honey, you will NOT be moving anytime soon."
"Abby, you don't know-"
"Shut it up, you, don't even start this. I am so kicking your butt."
"Be nice to him, Aunt Abby. Daddy was mean already."
"I know, honey. I won't hurt him anymore than your Daddy already has."
Jenny got off the bed and was hugged by Abby when she went by
her. "Does Daddy really not love us?"
"No, honey, he loves you very much. That is why he said what he said.
He's scared, that's all. Trust me, before the day is out, we will see
your Daddy and he will say he's sorry, okay?"
"Will he fix it? He always fixes it."
"Yes, he will."
"Like hell am I seeing that bastard ever again."
"You zip it, I am about to kick your ass now."
"No, I'm out of here."
Tony walked past Abby but didn't get past Tim at the bottom of the
stairs. He tried but Tim had started working out and Tony was in his
room now on the bed with an arm behind his back. Abby and Jenny
walked down the stairs and Jenny saw Tim holding her Dad down.
"Don't hurt him, Uncle Tim, he's not-"
"It's okay, honey, go and see about lunch."
"Just be nice and no yelling."
"We promise, honey."
Jenny walked back down to the kitchen. After Jenny was out, Abby and
Tim had Tony in the bedroom. Tim got off of Tony.
"Fuck you."
"No, Tony, fuck you. How the fuck could you put that little girl
through finding her Dad dead in the bathroom?"
"What, Abby?"
"Tom told me. Cutting yourself and almost killing yourself. Do you
know that right now the state can come in and take them both away
from you?"
"Whatever."
"No, not whatever. Tony you love them and YOU still love Gibbs."
"Fuck that bastard!"
"No, Tony. He loves you. He's just as scared right now."
"Oh, and I bet he said that."
"Yes, as a matter of fact, he did after Ducky and Abby kicked his
ass. Now it's your turn."
"I'm not ever seeing him again. He can fucking keep the money, the
house, whatever."
"Oh, you are more stubborn than him, you know that?" Abby hit Tony
upside the head.
"Ouch, stop that!"
"Or what? You'll hit me, you'll kill yourself? Tony, think. Is that
man really worth killing yourself over? No, no one in this world is
worth that. I can almost forgive you for cutting. I had a thing for
it in high school, but please, that little boy and girl need you more
than anything. She had to see her father get shot, then in the
hospital, then see him yell at you and her, then hear the gun again
in her own house. You think that is going away anytime soon?"
"It's not my fault."
"Tony, wake up, the hell it's not. Jenny needs her fathers, and that
would be together."
"Thanks, McGee, but not going to fly. He meant what he said."
"And how the hell do you know that?"
"He always-"
"Oh, Tony, get off it. He was trying to protect you and not have to
have you care for him anymore in a wheelchair."
"So let him fucking rot."
"Okay, listen to me, you pig-headed son of a bitch. You're getting in
that car or Abby and myself will fucking use the fuzzy handcuffs and
make you get in that car. Do I make myself clear?"
Tony froze at Tim's words. Tim had never said anything like that to
him, ever.
"And if I don't?"
"I think even seven months pregnant I can still take you, DiNozzo."
"Fine, but I am not staying, only going to tell him to fuck himself."
"Yeah, right, then we have backup. I think Ducky will beat you with
the umbrella like he did Gibbs."
Tony wanted to smile at that thought. He did get up and follow Tim
and Abby down the stairs.
"Okay, honey, let's get a jacket on you."
"Where we going, Uncle Tim?"
"To see your Daddy."
"Dad, are you okay?"
"Fine."
Tony was being nice but Abby could feel the acid in the word and
slapped him upside the head. Jenny started to giggle. That made Tony
happy if nothing else did. Tim and Jenny, with Tony in tow, went out
to the SUV. Abby had Matt in her arms after a moment of talking to
Tom and telling him what the deal was and what was going on. They
drove to the hospital in Baltimore but no one said a word. Matt was
passed out shortly after starting their trip. Tim had put the
suitcases in the back already.
They got to the hospital and they went up to the floor where Gibbs
was.
"Well, hello, my dear, it is good to see you again," the Scottish man
said.
"Hi, Ducky."
"We're going to let your fathers talk for a moment, okay?"
"But I want to see my Daddy."
"I know, honey, but I think they need to talk first. From what your
Daddy told me, he needs to say a few things first, okay?"
Jenny looked at Tony, who turned around and went to the ground. "It's
okay, Peanut, just give me a moment, then we're going home."
Abby shot him a look that said like hell with her lover, Ziva, right
next to her shooting the same look.
Tony hugged his daughter and handed Matt to Tim and walked in but
didn't leave the doorway and just shut the door.
Tony stood there in the doorway, not moving any closer. He was about
to bitch out Gibbs.
"Tony."
"Gibbs."
"Look-"
"No, you look, you fucking ass. How dare you say that in front of my
little girl?"
"Tony, look, listen-"
"No, you listen to me, you fucking bastard. I never want to see you
again. You hear me? Keep the fucking money, keep the house, but I'll
be damned if you ever see the kids again."
Gibbs sat there and took the words his lover said to him. He knew he
meant them.
"Poppy, tell him you love him."
Gibbs was seeing Megan sitting on the bed again.
"Tony, look, I love you."
"Like hell," Tony spat, shaking. "Now you're just feeling guilty, and
you should. I'm a faggot? Look in the mirror, Jethro."
"He's right, Lee. You know it."
"I know, Mark, but how can I ask him that without him thinking that
I'm replacing you?"
"Tell him, show him, make him see, make him feel again."
Tony was looking at Gibbs talking to nothing at the end of his bed,
lost and about to turn and walk out of the room when Gibbs sat
straight up in bed. Gibbs removed the covers from over him. He was
very shaky and almost falling out of bed from just that, very weak
and having no balance, still in the hospital gown. He was still
hooked up to an IV drip and antibiotics and morphine as well as a
heart monitor.
Gibbs moved his legs off the bed with his hand and now they dangled
off the bed. Ducky and the others saw this through the window but
Ducky wouldn't let anyone in that room. Seeing this, neither would
Tim or the rest. Ducky knew deep down Tony wouldn't let Gibbs hurt
himself. Yes, he might pull out a few things but they were easily put
back in.
"Look, Tony, I love you. I fucked up."
Tony was pissed but that was washing away in fear now. Gibbs was
about to stand up, but Tony knew he couldn't, he would fall right
down. Before anyone could think, Gibbs was getting out of bed and
Tony was gliding the body to the floor. The IV and tubing ripped out
of his body. Tony was holding his lover in his arms and leaning on
his legs. Gibbs was in tears.
"I love you, Anthony Michael DiNozzo, never doubt that."
Tony was in tears, holding the man he loved.
Chapter End Notes:
OK please have read No More Sick Days as well as And Jenny Makes 3.
Ok i would love to Thank G and BC and a few others
that will remain nameless for prereading this and letting me know
what they liked about it.
Ok i would love to Thank G and BC and a few others
that will remain nameless for prereading this and letting me know
what they liked about it.