Gibbs woke, blinking as he stared up at an unfamiliar ceiling, trying to remember where he was and how he'd gotten there. Bits and pieces came to him in random order: driving at night, Virginia, breakfast with a stranger, cabin, DiNozzo. He nodded to himself, slowly putting things together.
He yawned, headed cocked to one side as he listened for sounds of life. The faint patter of rain against the roof was the only noise to break the silence. Gibbs wondered when it had started raining. He glanced at his watch, squinting to see the numbers clearly. It was almost noon.
He stretched, enjoying the feel of high quality sheets and a top of the line mattress. He smiled fondly. Only DiNozzo would bother making sure some basic creature comforts were not forgotten in a place that probably didn't even have running water.
The Ibuprofen he'd taken before he laid down had worn off, but at the moment, Gibbs felt pretty good. He rolled over on to his side, snuggling under the quilt. A dull thump made him raise his head, looking for the source of the noise.
The book he'd grabbed earlier had fallen from the bed onto an area rug on the floor near the bed. Gibbs didn't even know what the title or what it was about. He'd only realized he couldn't read it after he lay down. He didn't have his glasses.
Gibbs gave the book a dirty look. It wasn't the book's fault he'd forgotten he needed glasses to read now. Although, he knew his forgetting them wasn't exactly a new occurrence. He'd been misplacing pretty much since the day the doctor proscribed them.
Gibbs sighed. It was more proof that it really had been fifteen years. Damn.
Gibbs grimaced as his bladder started demanding attention. It was likely what had woken him in the first place. He cursed, pushing back the warm blanket and getting out of bed. He swayed for a moment, gripping the bed post until his legs were solid under him. Damn concussions. They were never a one day deal.
He pulled on his pants. His shoes were at the foot of the bed. He sat on the nearby bench to pull them on. He hadn't noticed any other rooms to the cabin so it was likely going to be a trek outside to find the head.
Gibbs headed out into the main room. The fire had burned down to just a few embers but they were still enough to put off some heat, making the room noticeably warmer than the bedroom had been. Tony was curled up on the couch, looking surprisingly small for someone of his height and size.
He looked very young to Gibbs. Too young to be the seasoned agent Gibbs knew him to be. Gibbs frowned as an image of Tony asleep at his desk came to him. He knew he'd seen Tony doing that several times. He remembered marveling as how the younger man really could sleep just about anywhere and in some of the most uncomfortable looking positions.
Look down at Tony, Gibbs couldn't help smiling. At least he looked comfortable here. He eyed the blanket sliding off the edge of the couch. Gibbs assumed had come from the chest that appeared to be serving double duty as a coffee table. He hadn't seen the blanket lying around when they'd entered earlier. Gibbs reached down to pull it back up to cover Tony.
Tony's hand shot out to neatly capture his arm at the wrist with a surprisingly firm grip, halting his movement. Bleary green eyes studied him, brow furrowing in confusion. Tony blinked. "Boss?"
"DiNozzo." Gibbs kept his tone neutral, waiting for the younger man to wake more fully.
"Sorry." Tony immediately let go, his hand moving to rub at his eyes. "What time is it?"
"Almost noon."
Tony grunted an acknowledgement, eyes drifting closed again. "You need something?"
"The head."
Tony nodded. He made a vague hand motion toward the door. "Follow the path north. It's 'bout 50 yards or so."
Gibbs shrugged into his jacket, glad he'd been wearing one last night. The rain had tapered off to more of a heavy mist, but the air was still chilly. The path through the trees was obvious. It led directly to an outhouse.
Gibbs grinned. The outhouse looked like a miniature version of the cabin. He was pleased to find a plastic bottle full of water, a bar of soap, and a hand towel on the shelf under the eaves near the door. Also on the shelf were a small bowl and a mirror propped up against the wall. Gibbs rubbed his chin. Shaving could wait for a bit.
On his way back to the cabin Gibbs stopped at the edge of the clearing. He took a slow, deep breath, filling his lungs to capacity. He released it with a satisfied sigh. The air smelled fresh and clean, with a hint of wood smoke.
Gibbs rolled his shoulders, working out a few kinks. He did a few stretches as well, wanting to limber up a bit. He felt pretty good, all things considered. A cup of coffee was all he needed now. Gibbs slipped into the cabin, closing the door quietly behind him. If there wasn't coffee to be had in the cabin, maybe Mike wouldn't mind him stopping by for a cup.
"You find it okay?" Tony was sitting on the couch, a mug in one hand, blanket loosely wrapped around him.
"Yeah." Gibbs had expected the younger man to have gone back to sleep. He pointed to the mug. "That coffee?"
"Hot chocolate." Tony nodded toward the fireplace. "Coffee is perking."
Hanging from a wrought iron hook over the fire was a camping style coffee pot. Gibbs arched an eyebrow. The set up seemed a little archaic for Tony to be willing to use or even know how.
Tony smirked. "Yeah, I know. It's not really me." He shrugged before taking a sip from his mug. "The place was built before they had electricity and it's never been wired for it. Uncle Sal said the guy he bought the place from cooked everything in the fireplace. Can't quite see doing a turkey in there, but Momma C said it could be done."
"Momma C?"
"Mike's mother." Tony clarified. "She says it's not much different than cooking with gas. Well, other than that whole push button instant flame and fine temperature control thing. Since I can't cook worth a damn, I'm taking her word for it."
Gibbs picked up the empty mug sitting on the trunk. It was a match to the one Tony was holding. He used the hot pad on the mantel to pull the coffee pot to him, filling the mug. Straitening up, he glanced around, frowning slightly. There was no sink or kitchen in the cabin, and it didn't appear to have any plumbing. "Where'd you get the water from?"
Tony pointed out the back window. Only a few feet from the house was an old red hand-pump. Gibbs had seen one like it at his grandfather's place when he was a boy. Several minutes of working the handle would result in fresh, clear, cold water.
"Not sure how deep the well is." Tony rolled his head from one side to the other, stretching his neck. "I get the water quality tested periodically just to be sure it's safe to use. Other than being a little high in calcium from the limestone around here it's always come back clean."
Tony curled his feet under him, wrapping the blanket more securely around himself. Gibbs remembered Kelly doing the same thing Saturday mornings when she watched cartoons.
Gibbs sat on the opposite end of the couch, his back to the armrest so he could face Tony easily. He took a cautious sip of his coffee, pleasantly surprised to find it much better than he expected.
"You sleep well?" Tony asked, looking just a little smug.
Gibbs rolled his eyes. "Yes, I did."
"Good." Tony grinned.
It was annoying that he'd been right, but Gibbs couldn't really begrudge Tony for acting a touch superior. The bed was definitely comfortable. He did feel better for sleeping for several hours and the painkillers had been a damn good idea.
Gibbs sipped his coffee, enjoying the warmth and flavor. "How often do you come here?"
"Not as often as I'd like." Tony smiled ruefully. "Probably not as often as I need to."
Gibbs scowled, not pleased with the obviously honest but unspecific answer. "I thought you said you hated nature."
"No," Tony corrected quietly, "I said I usually prefer to experience it via television. And that I'd never been camping or hunting." Green eyes made a sweep of the room. "This is not sleeping on the ground in a tent or laying in wait for some furry animal to kill."
Gibbs snorted. "Semantics."
"Semantics are important."
"Bullshit."
"Flowers have a fragrance. Food has an aroma. Skunks have a stench." Tony grinned. "Without semantics, they'd all just stink."
Gibbs chuckled in spite of himself. He realized with some amazement that Tony often made him want to laugh. He'd smiled more in the last few years than he had since Shannon and Kelly's deaths.
"How did we meet?" Gibbs asked abruptly, determined to fill in the missing pieces.
"Dead sailor in Baltimore," Tony answered, not put off by the non sequitur. "I was in homicide at the time. So the case was initially assigned to me and my partner."
"Your partner...Levi...Lovitt?"
"Levitson." Tony supplied the correct name. "You hated each other on sight. He was a former Army Ranger."
Gibbs nodded. He couldn't quite picture the man but he had an impression of him as being big, like a linebacker, and tough as nails. The man hadn't wanted to give Gibbs the case. He was an ass; Gibbs clearly remembered that much about the man.
"Sailor was part of what looked like a serial killing. Already had two bodies killed the same way when the sailor was found." Tony grimaced. "Levitson wasn't keen on the idea of losing any evidence that might catch the son of a bitch."
Gibbs knew Tony hadn't been keen on it either; he was just better at trying to find common ground for them to work together. It might have come to blows between Gibbs and Levitson if Tony hadn't been there to soothe ruffled feathers. That willingness to work together, and never losing sight of the objective to put a killer behind bars no matter who got the job done, was something Gibbs hadn't appreciated immediately at the time.
"Different killers," Gibbs said, remembering that detail. The sailor's killer was a copy cat. A damn good one at that. Tony was the one to first propose the theory of a second killer. His instincts and thinking outside the box had impressed Gibbs even as Levitson had been a real jackass about making Tony prove he was right.
"Yeah." Tony eyed him. "You remember now?"
"The medical examiner." Gibbs didn't quite ask, but he wasn't completely sure either.
Tony nodded. "She had everything she needed to make it look like the same killer." He grimaced, looking into his mug. "Never figured Monica for the vindictive and violent type, but I guess that whole ?beware of a woman scorned' thing had to come from somewhere. She was definitely proof of that."
Gibbs grip on his mug tightened as memories of the end of that case made themselves known. Tony had confronted Monica with what they knew, accusing her of copying the murders to disguise another. She drew a gun on him. Tony just smiled and kept talking, confident she wasn't going to pull the trigger. Gibbs hadn't been so sure. He'd been ready to double tap her in the chest when she finally lowered her weapon and surrendered.
Tony's smile hadn't faltered until Gibbs smacked him upside the back of the head. "What the hell was that for?" Tony had asked, indignant. Gibbs had wanted to tell him it was for scaring the shit out of him, for risking his life like that, but he'd settled for glaring at the younger man instead.
"You offered me a job a week later," Tony said, pulling Gibbs from his reverie.
"Why did you take it?" He recalled Tony having gotten along well with his coworkers and was respected by his boss. Gibbs hadn't really expected the younger man to accept, but he'd made the offer just the same. Tony had good instincts, was sharp and had all the people skills Gibbs so obviously lacked.
Tony looked away, gaze shifting to rest on the fire. "I'd been there two years."
He said it like it should explain everything. Gibbs couldn't bring himself to tell Tony it didn't. He opted to let it go rather than ask for more information.
Tony uncurled from the blanket enough to lean forward enough to put his mug on the trunk. The white cotton sleeveless undershirt the younger man was wearing revealed the nice definition of his arms. Gibbs eyes narrowed as he noticed a scar on Tony's upper right arm. He unthinkingly reached out and traced the scar with one finger.
"This is fairly new...isn't it?" The skin was still a dark pink, a distinct line against the darker cream complexion around it.
"Last six months or so, yeah."
Gibbs traced the scar again, noting the faint puckering at one end that he recognized as being the result of popped stitches. He pulled back when Tony shivered. Tony readjusted the blanket, once more concealing his arms from view.
"Wasn't any big deal, Boss. Just a bullet burn."
"You left. After you got hurt, you left." Gibbs frowned, surprised by the accusation he could hear in his voice. He wasn't even sure why he was angry, why he felt betrayed. "You never take leave?and you just left."
Tony winced, not looking at him. "Not because of my arm."
Gibbs growled, unhappy with getting another honest but uninformative answer. Tony had left. No phone calls, no messages, nothing. His eyes narrowed, glaring at his senior agent. "Why?"
Tony shook his head, green eyes shuttered when he looked at Gibbs. "You didn't know then. You don't need to know now."
"God damn it, DiNozzo." Gibbs slammed his coffee mug down on the trunk, rising to his feet. "Do not play games with me."
"I'm not." Tony faced him squarely, shrugging free of the blanket.
Gibbs eyes narrowed, understanding the move for what it was; Tony was freeing his hands to either attack or defend. It was what Gibbs would have done. What struck him as most significant was Tony didn't look afraid of him. Wary maybe, cautious, but not scared or uncertain, and he definitely wasn't backing down.
Gibbs knew if it came down to it, he could kick Tony's ass. He'd done it before. He knew he had at the gym in the boxing ring, in the morgue demonstrating how to snap a man's neck. But he didn't want to, didn't want to be confrontational, didn't want to alienate or hurt Tony. Damn it, Gibbs swore silently, I like him so why the hell am I being such a prick? Gibbs took a deep breath and forced himself to back off. They weren't at the office, this wasn't about a case, or proving who was right or wrong. Kicking Tony's ass might make him feel better, for a moment, but it wouldn't get him the answer he wanted. It would likely ensure he never got it.
"I'm--" Gibbs took another deep breath, hesitating before finally getting it out. "I'm sorry."
Tony blinked, whispering, "Wow." He shook his head, eying Gibbs suspiciously. "You know, it's twice you've said that to me. I feel like I should be looking for more signs of the apocalypse. Four Horsemen on the horizon. Falling stars. Maybe a dragon or two."
Gibbs fought off another smile, enjoying the bit of humor Tony managed to infuse once more into their conversation. He also suppressed the desire to tell him apologizing was a sign of weakness. Franks said it all the time. When the hell had it become his own motto?
Gibbs sat down, rubbed a hand over his face, wincing when still healing skin reminded him it was tender to the touch. He sighed. "I shouldn't have asked?"
"You didn't ask," Tony's lips curled upward, "you demanded."
"Semantics." Gibbs could feel a smile of his own forming in spite of his efforts to stop it.
"Told you they were important." Tony laughed softly. "You wanted to know then and I didn't tell you. Not a bit surprise you'd still want to know. You're like a dog with a bone. Nice to know you always have been."
The last was said with an odd blend of respect and annoyance. Gibbs could feel his face warm. Most people found his tenacity infuriating when directed at them, not worthy of admiration. Tony was definitely one of a kind.
"Why make it a secret?" Gibbs cocked his head to one side, studying the younger man, unable to just let it drop even though it was probably a good idea to. He didn't think Tony kept many secrets; maybe that was why he felt betrayed, why he felt so lost when Tony had left. He didn't want there to be anything he didn't know about Tony.
"It's not a secret. At least not in the ?I tell you and I'll have to kill' you kind of thing." Tony shrugged. "It is just private." Green eyes met his easily. "I'm sure you understand private. Probably a hell of a lot better than most."
Private. Yeah, he got that. Private to him covered most of his past?his service record and his purple heart, his wife, his daughter, his loss. It was embarrassing to realize he hadn't even considered what might be private, too personal to share for Tony.
Tony said no one else from the office had ever been to the cabin or knew about Mike's family, yet he willingly, without any hesitation, shared it with Gibbs. He felt something ease and expand inside him, something wasn't even sure he could name. He also felt like an idiot for pushing for more than Tony was willing to give, for demanding more when Tony had already given him so much.
"I really am a bastard," Gibbs muttered to himself.
"It's okay. Not like I didn't already know that." Tony smiled. "You always said that's what the second ?B' stood for."
"Didn't think you'd hear that," Gibbs sat back in surprise, expression shifting toward sheepish.
"I got good ears."
"And eyes." Gibbs realized with another moment of insight. "Better than 20/20."
Tony's smile broadened, clearly delighted with Gibbs' spontaneous recall. "Way you are remembering things you'll be back to normal in no time."
Gibbs nodded, but for some reason the idea didn't excite or reassure him much. He wanted his memories back, wanted to fill in the blanks, but Gibbs wasn't sure what the hell ?normal' for him was. Or if he even wanted to go back to 'normal'. Some how he was sure 'normal' didn't include very many moments of time alone with Tony. How the hell could he miss something he'd never had? Strange.
"You okay?" Tony gave him concerned look, brow furrowing as he gave Gibbs a once over.
"I'm fine."
Tony nodded slowly. He was obviously just humoring Gibbs, but the older man was glad he let it go. He didn't want to snap at Tony, and he knew he would if pressed. He wonder if Tony knew and backed off accordingly. Shame Ducky never learned to do that. He usually persisted, forcing Gibbs to walk away.
Tony got up, stretching like a lazy cat; his movements languid and graceful. It was decidedly appealing. Gibbs realized with some astonishment he liked watching Tony, that he'd been doing so for a long time, since before he'd even offered him a job.
Gibbs realized he'd made a habit of hiding where he could watch without being seen. It wasn't about making sure Tony was working or trying to catch him goofing off?.he liked to watch him. He'd often done the same thing with Shannon, eyes always drawn to her no matter what she was doing.
Tony bent down to pick up his jeans from where they lay in a rumpled pile on the floor. Gibbs couldn't help noticing how nicely the boxer briefs he was wearing showed off his ass. He looked away. It had been years since he'd seriously looked at another man that way.
He bit his lower lip. No, it hadn't been years. He'd just forgotten that little detail along with dozens of other things. He'd noticed Tony was attractive the day he'd met him. For all he knew at this point, it might well have been one more reason he offered him the job.
Tony pulled on his jeans, sliding impossibly long legs into the well worn denim. Gibbs forced himself not to stare. Tony was his subordinate, his second in command, a coworker. But then he'd evidently already violated his own personal rule about sex with teammates at least once if what he remembered about Jen Sheppard was as accurate as it seemed. Maybe she was the reason for the rule. He really didn't know.
Tony pulled on his sneakers, tying them sloppily before shrugging into an Ohio State sweatshirt. "Going to hit the head."
Gibbs nodded. "I'm...ah...I'm going to take a walk."
"You want company?"
"Nah." Gibbs shook his head. "Just need some time to myself." He needed to do some thinking.
"If you head West, there's a trail that will take you on a loop that goes a couple of miles," Tony offered. "Crosses over into the park but it will bring you right back here."
"I'm not going to get lost," Gibbs ground out.
"Didn't say you were." Tony held up both hands, palms out. "You're a big boy, badass Marine and all that. Was just a suggestion."
Gibbs refused to apologize, even though he felt like he should. There was no call to snap at Tony. Not really. Just because he needed to get his head screwed on straight didn't mean he should take off DiNozzo's for trying to watch out for him.
"I'll be back in a few hours." That should give him plenty of time to think.
"I'll see you then."
It was not quite a promise but very close to it. Gibbs knew if he took too long, Tony would come looking for him. It was distinctly comforting to know the younger man had his six.
"I'll be on the trail." It had been a good suggestion. He didn't know the area. And if he got into trouble, Tony would know where to find him.
"Copy that." Tony smiled. "Try not to get eaten by any bears, Boss."
Gibbs rolled his eyes. The younger man was definitely irrepressible. And he liked that. Liked that a lot. Maybe too much. Maybe not enough. Gibbs didn't know for sure yet. But it was definitely something he needed to figure out.
TBC
Author's Chapter Notes:
Gibbs and Tony at the cabin
Chapter End Notes:
pre-slash. spoilers for too many to mention.