The Incident at Harry's Place
Chapter One – Tony's Dinner Party: In Which Tony Cooks Dinner and Talks about Mikey
Shortly after Ziva David had come to be a liaison officer with NCIS, she'd had a dinner party. Most of the team was there, including Gibbs, which was a shock because he almost never socialized. One person who hadn't been there was Tony DiNozzo.
He was hurt and disappointed. All he'd ever wanted in his life was to be liked, to be appreciated for his considerable positive attributes, never mind that he sometimes covered his need with a jokey, frat-boy attitude that was counter-productive to his first desire. Sometimes, when he made sexist remarks or bragged about his sexual conquests, he hated himself. And he could certainly understand if the persona he presented to the world caused people to dislike him. But couldn't they figure out it was a defense mechanism? A shield against the feeling that had been nurtured by his parents' emotional neglect, that he wasn't really wanted, that he had no value, no worth?
Tonight, though, things were a little different. He was having a dinner party for his colleagues—well, most of them anyway. Ziva certainly wasn't going to be there, nor the director. They didn't know about Mikey, and Tony for one wasn't ready to include them in the small circle of his coworkers who did know.
The team had to develop a strategy for dealing with their latest case, and someone had suggested—well, Tony had suggested—that Mikey might be able to help. Everyone liked Mikey; he was a beautiful cat and smart as Tony himself. Even his Tony-like swagger garnered more admiration than did Tony's own frequently flaunted machismo.
Gibbs was not enthusiastic about the idea. He had conceded that Mikey's help in the Jody Silverton case had helped crack WO Sheckelman's prostitution ring much sooner than otherwise, and he did agree that, based on that history, Tony's suggestion merited consideration, but any discussion couldn't take place at NCIS headquarters for obvious reasons. That's when Tony had another idea—he suggested that the team meet at his apartment, and he would fix dinner for them while they talked about the case. For him, it was the best of all possible worlds. And Ziva wouldn't be there.
He'd asked Gibbs for the afternoon off so he could do the shopping and the preparation. As the team gathered in his apartment, they could smell wonderful odors coming from the kitchen. He offered them vintage chianti with the little antipasti he'd prepared, but the fragrance of the lasagna made them inpatient for the main course, and they soon invaded the kitchen.
As he removed the huge pan of lasagna from the oven, along with the garlic bread in its aluminum foil, and as he poured the specially made vinaigrette over the salad, there was a chorus of ooos and aaahs. While dishing up, Tony informed his guests that he had made everything but the cheeses from scratch using his Nonna DiNozzo's recipes. The noodles, the tomatoey rich meat sauce, even the bread—everything created by his own hand. They were suitably impressed, especially after taking their first bites. Even Gibbs pronounced, through a mouthful of cheese and sauce and noodles, and to Tony's utter bliss, that it "wasn't bad."
Once the dinner platters had been cleared, he brought out the dessert. Tiramisu had become popular with the general population in recent years, but Tony didn't take the easy way out by stopping at Costco to buy it ready-made. Instead, he baked his own ladyfingers and generously soaked them with strong espresso and liqueur, whipped up his own mascarpone cream, and then piled on shaved chocolate and whipped heavy cream.
"Oh, god, Tony" said Abby through her first bite of the heavenly dessert, "you can cook for me any day."
Tony grinned his thanks. They did appreciate him. It had been worth the extra effort.
Gibbs put his fork down and asked, "What I want to know is how a cat can be such a good cook."
"I'm a creature of many talents," Tony replied to a general laugh.
Before serving the tiramisu, Tony had made a pot of coffee and some tea for Ducky. When the dessert had disappeared to another round of appreciative moans and groans, Tony set out more beverages and candies. They continued to sit around the table in a state of contented repletion until Gibbs reminded them that they were there for a purpose.
"All right," Gibbs began. "Thanks a lot, Tony. Too bad you can't cook for every staff meeting." He paused to take another sip of coffee. "Even your coffee's okay."
"Thanks, boss," Tony answered, his face alight with his brightest, broadest grin. His inspiration had worked; even his boss was impressed. If he died right now, he'd go out as the happiest man on earth.
Gibbs went on, "To business. We need a way to infiltrate this gang that's supplying drugs to Navy vessels. It's been suggested that we send Mikey under cover again. We have a lead on one person who's responsible for distributing the stuff and we know his base of operation, but we're pretty sure he's only the middle man. Someone else is supplying him, and what we want to do is take down the whole organization."
"Is there some reason that we shouldn't use Mikey?" Abby asked.
"The director is very suspicious. She somehow heard that a cat was involved in the Silverton case. She's really pissed, not so much about that, but because she isn't in the loop. That's one problem. Another is the extra degree of danger involved in doing drug investigations, even for a human, let alone a cat."
"There are a lot of advantages to using a cat," Tony reminded his boss. "It's a lot harder for the bad buys to make a cat to begin with. No one's going to believe a cat is surveilling them, and if it's a werecat with human intelligence and cat senses, well--."
Gibbs sighed. "I understand, but I really don't want to start relying on Mikey's unusual abilities. We should be able to solve our cases using the same, old-fashioned resources we've always had."
"But it really is kind of a fun idea to use a cat," Abby said with sparkling eyes. "Nobody, none of the bad guys, would ever suspect."
"They might not suspect the cat is surveilling them," Gibbs pointed out, "but there are a lot of nasty-tempered people out there who don't like cats and who wouldn't hesitate to kick it up against a wall or worse."
"Well, I'm pretty darned fast as a cat," said Tony. "I can avoid stuff like that."
"Accidents happen," Gibbs growled.
Ducky spoke up. "You know, Jethro, when Anthony was bitten by the werewolf Collins and we didn't know for sure if he would Change, or what would happen if he did, we had a lot of questions about the whole process. Tony's gained control of his…gift, but we've never really discussed how he does it."
"Yeah," McGee chimed in. "I've been there when he's Changed, but I still don't understand what happens or how he does it."
Gibbs looked at DiNozzo. "Maybe if you told us what goes on, we'll have a better idea of whether we should be using Mikey on investigations."
Tony took a sip of coffee. "Yeah, there were a lot of questions. First of all, there's nothing but folk literature that talks about werewolves and other were-animals. As Ducky pointed out, no one's ever done any scientific studies on lycanthropy."
He looked around the table with a smile. "Now we all know that it does happen, and that it happens just the way the old wives' tales said it did. The were-animal bites someone and infects the bitee with whatever the were element is."
"Sorta like with vampires," Abby said.
Ducky shivered slightly. "I don't even want to speculate on that," he said. "It's difficult enough to wrap one's head around the concept of were-animals actually existing." He brightened. "But of course the stories are all about werewolves. We had no idea what was going to happen when Anthony was bitten. We certainly didn't expect a werecat."
"Especially such a gorgeous one," Abby interjected, to which Tony responded with a slight bow and a smirk.
"Tony, go on," ordered Gibbs, trying to get the conversation back on track.
"Well, even though we were as prepared as we could be for my first Change, I still didn't know what to expect. Once I Changed, I found out I was still pretty much Tony, only with cat perceptions and body skills."
"Kate frightened you when she picked you up," Gibbs reminded him.
"Yeah, but it was partly my fault. I didn't know what my capabilities were, and when she got pissed because I was…um…touching her breasts and she threw me down, the cat part of me panicked, and I ran away."
"Tony!" Abby cried with a giggle. "You're such a bad boy. In either form."
He replied with a wink and went on. "The first few months were mostly a matter of getting used to going through the Change every time there was a full moon, and I still wasn't aware of whether I could Change on my own. Ducky helped me a lot. He was always with me at the time of the full moon. He told me to start out by trying to remember how my body and my mind felt while I was actually Changing. Then during times when there wasn't a full moon, I'd practice trying to replicate those feelings."
Ducky continued the story. "Anthony's first attempts to Change at will were rather frightening. Our worst fear was that he would Change once and then not be able to Change back until the next full moon. We did have a couple of scary moments, but fortunately everything worked out well. And now he is indeed able to Change successfully whenever he chooses."
"And I know your clothes kinda drop around you when you Change," McGee added, "and it's best if someone gives them back to you before you Change back."
"Now that I'd like to see," Abby said with a mischievous grin.
"If you're lucky…," Tony grinned back at her.
Gibbs had another question. "Do you still Change at every full moon?"
"Well, sorta," Tony responded. "So far, it hasn't been automatic. I don't Change as long as the moonlight doesn't actually touch me. If there aren't any clouds, I try to stay inside with the blinds closed unless there's something I need to do as a cat."
"And what about the silver bullets and all that?" Gibbs asked.
Tony explained, "Well, we know Collins died after being shot in human form. So it seems were-animals are mortal in their human form. I'm not really willing to do any experiments with silver bullets while I'm Changed, though," he added with a shiver.
"What's it like to be a cat?" Abby queried. "Do you have…um…tomcat urges and all that?"
Tony's grin was at its widest. "There's this hot little tortoiseshell named Susie in my neighborhood that I've been seeing. Ouch!"
Tony reached up and rubbed the back of his head where Gibbs had just smacked it.
Gibbs looked at Ducky. "Duck, are you confident that Tony is handling his Changes well enough that Mikey wouldn't have any problems going undercover again? Are his cat attributes enough to keep him out of most dangerous situations?"
Ducky said, "Anthony's job—the job all of you do—is dangerous enough that you are all constantly in peril. In his human form, Anthony is both smart and physically fit. As he pointed out, in cat form he retains those characteristics as well as the heightened senses and agility of the feline. If he can handle himself in bad situations as a human, I have no reason to believe he will be any less capable as a werecat. He has completely human mental comprehension. In fact, his only limitation in cat form is that his ability to communicate with us is…um…limited to the non-verbal."
Gibbs looked thoughtful for a long moment before he spoke again. "I'm still not completely convinced that it's a good idea. But the last time we used Mikey as an agent it seemed to go well, and it did help us resolve the case sooner than we expected." He looked around the room to see if anyone showed any hesitancy and saw only eagerness. "All right, we know what we're going to do. We'll start the surveillance tomorrow night. Now everybody go home and get a good night's sleep. We'll all need to be on our paws for this operation."
The team gaped. Gibbs had made a joke.
Story Notes:
The usual disclaimers.
Author's Chapter Notes:
In which Tony cooks dinner and talks about Mikey
Chapter End Notes:
The latest adventure of Mikey, undercover cat.