The third postcard was lying on the hall table as he slipped around the door. He had been true to his word; he hadn't wasted a minute getting to her once he had felt ready to go home. It was 3.30am and he had just got into town.
They all had keys to each other's homes for emergencies. He would just look in on her for now; to see for himself that she was well and safe. Then he would sleep on the couch. She would be happy to see him in the morning. He had come home.
He would just peer around the door to her bedroom, to see her beauty in sleeping serenity, already knowing that the site would arrest his heart.
His heart clenched at the sight, as expected. His fists and jaws clenched, too, as he left the room and her apartment as silently as he had entered.
I wanted something
That's purer than the water
Like we were //
(one week later)
She had cried in Tony's arms yesterday. It should have been better now that he was back but if anything it was worse. Tony had stopped sleeping over when he returned, he had done that even after the drinking had stopped. But when he came back, Tony thought he wouldn't be needed any more. She had needed him more than ever last night.
She had always stood up for herself against him, giving back as good as she got but then he had never really been angry with her. Gruff, demanding and impatient, but never, ever, really angry.
Yesterday he had shouted at her. Got up in her face and really laid into her. She had trembled in fear and anger and grief and he had called her the weak link in their operation. He was demanding the scientifically impossible from her but wouldn't let her tell him it couldn't be done.
It's not there now
Ineloquence and anger
Are all we have //
Tony had tried to intervene. He had stepped between them and shielded her from her former protector. If anything it intensified the situation, hardening him against her. With cold, quiet fury Tony had been told never to question his leadership again, or he would be questioning his place on the team. Had been informed it was already in jeopardy.
Like Saturn's rings
An icy loop around me
Too hard to hold
Lash out first
At things we don't like
Or understand //
Only Tony had caught the look on his face as the elevator doors closed and she fell into his arms sobbing; it was one of pure, unrivalled, pain-filled longing.
And it's beginning to get to me
That I know more of the stars and sea
Than I do of what's in your head
Are you beginning to get my point
That all this fighting with aching joints
Is doing nothing but tire us out
And no one knows what the fight's about //
He returned to his desk and pounded it with his fist in frustration. He had hurt her, made her cry…hurt them both, but it didn't make him feel any better like it should have.
He had watched her turn and bury herself in Tony's arms, arms that were now braced over his desk as the agent leaned into his face, a day later, hatred all over his face.
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